Nearly every time a girl lets me cum in her (unprotected) on the first date, she ghosts me

[Dragonetti]

Sorry for the vulgar title but it's a pretty straightforward question. Why does this happen?

If a girl enthusiastically lets you to cum in her without contraception, that's a pretty big deal. It almost certainly means she's attracted to you and respects you as a man.

The latest girl really wanted it. We had sex multiple times and she loved it and came. She asked to make plans a few days away. Then poof, disappeared.

I thought the move is to always have sex on the first date. And I don't text much at all between dates because that's good game. Am I overgaming? What am I doing wrong? This is really annoying me.

 

[Rakehell]

First date? You’re a wild guy, I don’t do this but I have before (never on the first date). Whenever I do though i’m left with this feeling of responsibility like I know the dynamic is teetering on thin ice.

To me this is because the level of risk, danger, degradation, etc that you persuade a girl into doing with you, needs to be matched with at-least just as much after care or investment in you as a person after the fact.

Especially if she isn’t the most promiscuous of girls.

If she feels like she wasn’t properly rewarded with extra time attention or affection after doing something she doesn’t usually do, or you make her feel worse for doing it, she will resent the fact that it happened altogether.

 

[Rakehell]

First date? You’re a wild guy, I don’t do this but I have before (never on the first date). Whenever I do though i’m left with this feeling of responsibility like I know the dynamic is teetering on thin ice.

To me this is because the level of risk, danger, degradation, etc that you persuade a girl into doing with you, needs to be matched with at-least just as much after care or investment in you as a person after the fact.

Especially if she isn’t the most promiscuous of girls.

If she feels like she wasn’t properly rewarded with extra time attention or affection after doing something she doesn’t usually do, or you make her feel worse for doing it, she will resent the fact that it happened altogether.

Basically this isn’t one of those times where you call her a lyft and send her on her way afterward. Being too laid back will cost you her.

 

[Dragonetti]

Looks like I was overreacting this time. SHe texted back, no ghost

 

[Chase]

@Dragonetti,

IME there's two kinds of girls you can nut in the first night:

• Girls on birth control
• Girls not on birth control

The girls on birth control who let you nut in them typically let any guy nut in them, and it doesn't carry any more meaning for them than condomed sex. The whole point of them being on birth control while single is so men can nut in them without them needing to be in a relationship with the guy or trust the guy.

The girls not on birth control will not allow you to nut in them unless they are really feeling it with you. Nutting in these girls bonds them to you super tight usually. Especially if you nut in them multiple times, like it sounds this one did.

If she ghosts you after you nutted in her, fair chance she's on birth control and just sleeping around.

That said, back when I used to pick up girls really drunk, I had the odd incident here or there where we'd both be shitfaced and the girl would ask me the next day if I nutted in her or not and I'd be like "Yeah but just a little" (lol) and she'd be like "You can't do that!" and get angry/horny (then ghost). IMO the alcohol messes it up; she doesn't feel like she was making clearheaded decisions and is a lot more likely to have sex regret ("OMG I can't believe that random bar guy nutted in me... I have to get a Plan B now... I'm never drinking that much again!").

Chase

 

[Skills]

Looks like I was overreacting this time. SHe texted back, no ghost

Correct causation correlation....

 

[Hue]

I think that nutting inside a girl and / or doing very kinky shit on the first fuck and spike ASD and lead to buyers remorse sometimes.

This chick from SC who I absolutely freaked (still today some of the best sex I've ever had. She was so good at taking it lol) and I fucked in the ass, gave her a bunch of deep spot and A spot orgasms.... she felt like a huge slut for it and we haven't fucked since. RIP

 

[Hue]

Humble brag, my bad lol.

But yeah ASD can get triggered when you don't handle things in a leading way that balances her belief she can see you again (for physical or emotional reasons)

 

[Skills]

I think that nutting inside a girl and / or doing very kinky shit on the first fuck and spike ASD and lead to buyers remorse sometimes.

This chick from SC who I absolutely freaked (still today some of the best sex I've ever had. She was so good at taking it lol) and I fucked in the ass, gave her a bunch of deep spot and A spot orgasms.... she felt like a huge slut for it and we haven't fucked since. RIP

Again causation correlation.... Some girls will ghost no matter what... Most important is how you follow up and the actions you do post sex to prevent this... The more thing you do the more trust and compliance she is giving you...

 

[Lantern]

A good heuristic is the crazier/faster/more slutty/kinky etc. the sex is initially, the more of a romantic you should be in the aftermath and followup?

 

[Skills]

A good heuristic is the crazier/faster/more slutty/kinky etc. the sex is initially, the more of a romantic you should be in the aftermath and followup?

No necessarily, i have a whole post on what to do post sex i will link later... @Lantern here is the post:

How to increase odds after having sex with a girl for the 1st Time

What to do after having sex with a girl for the first time: A guys i am trying to help a fellows seducers exhibit a and exhibit b (both got laid post lay game went to totals shit), so i will make a full post, so in the future i can help other dudes going through similar (trust me i wish i had...

www.skilledseducer.com

 

[Hue]

Again causation correlation.... Some girls will ghost no matter what... Most important is how you follow up and the actions you do post sex to prevent this... The more thing you do the more trust and compliance she is giving you...

Yeah I'm admittedly only giving part of the story there. There were a ton of things at play and I had fucked a bunch of her friends.

If a girl isn't used to kink and you show her kink it can be too much at once though I think. But that's something you'd probably deal with the night of / in the present not days after.

 

[ChrisVirtue]

I think cumming inside the girl can give a lot of validation...

I think it's better to make them earn that rather than jumping to it on the first date.

It kinda takes some of your power away imo.

I've been thinking about this a bit over the last 2 weeks and I think overall, not wearing a condom, and cumming inside a girl can both be potentially perceived as low status behaviors depending on the girl

 

[Chase]

I think cumming inside the girl can give a lot of validation...

I think it's better to make them earn that rather than jumping to it on the first date.

It kinda takes some of your power away imo.

I've been thinking about this a bit over the last 2 weeks and I think overall, not wearing a condom, and cumming inside a girl can both be potentially perceived as low status behaviors depending on the girl

Interesting theory.

"This guy cums in everybody" vs. "This guy wants to cum in ME."

Don't be the guy who cums in everybody, lol...

I have actually had girls interrogate me over how common it is for me to go raw and how many other girls I've came in.

So there may be some truth to this...

 

[Skills]

I think cumming inside the girl can give a lot of validation...

I think it's better to make them earn that rather than jumping to it on the first date.

It kinda takes some of your power away imo.

I've been thinking about this a bit over the last 2 weeks and I think overall, not wearing a condom, and cumming inside a girl can both be potentially perceived as low status behaviors depending on the girl

Correct in one of my post on cum control i made this exact point... here is by skills:

Some things that will put you in the UP position, will give you an edge and some more leverage and power:

- obviously if you make her cum
-if you make her cum and you don't cum (this gives you tons of power and control)
-if you don't cum and she does not cum you are at level plain field

 

[Skills]

Interesting theory.

"This guy cums in everybody" vs. "This guy wants to cum in ME."

Don't be the guy who cums in everybody, lol...

I have actually had girls interrogate me over how common it is for me to go raw and how many other girls I've camno e in.

So there may be some truth to this...

No! it is that when you don't cum, you become more of a challenge more of the conquest... As long as she is not feeling inadequate...(fine balance)

Yeah I'm admittedly only giving part of the story there. There were a ton of things at play and I had fucked a bunch of her friends.

If a girl isn't used to kink and you show her kink it can be too much at once though I think. But that's something you'd probably deal with the night of / in the present not days after.

See, the you banging the girls she knows has more to do with the ghosting... No the kink

 

[OldGuy]

One reason go bareback once and then ghost is that they are using you for your sperm, and don't want to spend a lot of time with you for fear that their provider will find out.

 

[Skills]

One reason go bareback once and then ghost is that they are using you for your sperm, and don't want to spend a lot of time with you for fear that their provider will find out.

Nope... Guys seriously girls ghost for all type of reasons giving them orgasms, going raw, and sexually opening them with kink is the opposite effect of ghosting... Is investment and compliance... Most of you have a massive case of causation correlation

 

[Skills]

Related to op

Atmosphere - Dick hardness and cum control

cum control and hardness are important... specially during the 3 sex times sex rule, again: - one time sex means nothing now a days - two times you hook - 3 times you lock.... In theory that is how it works if things are done right(the better seducers can shorten time in theory), if not it may...

www.skilledseducer.com

 

[Hue]

One reason go bareback once and then ghost is that they are using you for your sperm, and don't want to spend a lot of time with you for fear that their provider will find out.

Seppuku literally had this happen lol.

LR - The Inseminator Request

Disclaimer: The following will not be endorsed by Girls Chase. Don't try this at home - unless you really know what you are doing. I was about to post this in my journal, but I think there is a lot to learn here from the feminine psyche, and it is worth showing in a distinct Lay Report entry...

www.skilledseducer.com