Orgasmatron

[Orgasmatron]

Okay, so I need to give this shit a proper go. I did a journal before and it was more of a mental dumping ground and I doubt it was terribly useful. I’ve not done any approaches for a while so I lost any momentum I did have, so it’s back to the starting blocks for me.

Anyway, I’ll be more concise this time and stick to the point.

What do I want to achieve?

• I want to be able to see a cute girl, go meet her, see what she’s like, decide if I like her, choose how I want things to proceed, and be able to make it happen.
• I want to be a guy who actually takes action and gets things done and not the guy I have been in the past who just wishes he had
• I want to enjoy doing all of this and have more fun in my life

Things I’ve got going for me

• Good social skills
• Funny
• Smart
• Not terrible looking
• Like learning stuff and want to get better

Things I’ve got working against me

• Age - I’m 43, I don’t think I look it, but I do think it complicates things - maybe that’s just in my head. We shall see.
• Lack of confidence in myself - Figure that as I do more approaching women, this will improve
• Lack of follow-through on pretty much everything in the past - the solution? Take more action
• Fear. Yep, scared to talk to cute girls. I don’t know what’s so scary about them, most of them seem quite nice. Part of me is scared things will go well, then I’d really feel out of my depth!

My main problems right now

• Doing enough approaches and spending enough time interacting with chicks I like the look of
• Not knowing what I’m supposed to be doing. I’ve read a lot of stuff, but I haven’t taken enough action to really learn anything yet, so that needs to change.
• Getting my head round the fact that it’s okay to have sexual desires and communicate that to girls. Still can’t quite grasp that chicks want to get laid too. I think the solution is sex with multiple women.

Stuff I’m working on at the moment

• Fundamentals - diet, exercise, all that stuff
• Working out what I’m supposed to do in a cold approach and how to move things forward
• Taking action - I feel this is by far the most important thing

Anyway, that’s this thing started. I’ll put up some challenges for myself next, and then it’ll be time to rock n roll at the weekend

 

[Beam]

Good to see you back man! Lets get it

 

[Orgasmatron]

So, I need to build some momentum and get out and I'm going to do the Newbie Assignment.

Day 1 - Observation

Let's find 4 places in the town where I can meet plenty of hot chicks.
There has to be lots of foot traffic and it has to be convenient for me to get to.

I've got a list of 12 places to go through and I'm going to see how long it takes to see 10 bangable babes in each location.

So, I'm off out to see what I can see...

 

[Orgasmatron]

Well, I've got some places to go now

1. Stockbridge
   • Right on my doorstep.
   • Even though the weather was pretty bad and it was a quiet morning, I still saw 9 cute girls in about 10 minutes.
   • So. I've really got no excuse when I literally just have to walk out onto the street near my home.
   • There's also Inverleith park nearby which is good in the summer or even if it's a nice day any other time of year. Also, the weekly outdoor market brings in lots of people on a Sunday.
2. St James Shopping Centre
   • Lots of girls here.
   • I'm not entirely sold on this place at the moment as we still have to wear facemasks, but once that's over, this could be good.
   • I am going to try and not let the facemask thing be an excuse though, so it's on the list.
3. Grassmarket
   • Decent amount of traffic here, places to sit and chill and hang around. Market stalls here at the weekend and lots of bars and cafes nearby so plenty of girls too.
   • Some streets nearby seemed quite good too, with girls coming from the university area, and others coming from tourist areas.
4. The Meadows & University area
   • A wee bit farther out, but lots of chicks walking through here.
   • Grab a coffee, take a seat, and see who pops along.
5. City centre shopping streets
   • George Street, Rose Street, Princes Street
6. Some other places that are okay, or could be good depending on weather
   • Princes Street Gardens
   • Royal Mile
   • The Castle
   • St Andrew's Square

Some places that will be good in a few weeks

• Christmas markets - open from 10am until 10pm from 19th November, which should have bar and food places
• Princes Street - East and West markets
• George Street

That's plenty of places to go. so I'll be going out again tomorrow for posture day. I was tempted to skip days 2 and 3 and go straight to day 4, but having read nino's Newbie Assignment I've decided to stick with the program and do each day properly. I think it's important to be aware of how other people's body language influences how they are perceived, so I'll be looking out for that.

 

[Orgasmatron]

Day 2 - Posture

This is something I've been working on for a while anyway. But, I went out for 2 hours this morning mainly to look at what other people, other dudes really, do. I didn't really see anyone who looked like they had a commanding walk or seemed very purposeful. Most people are just wandering about, looking aimless. Hand in pockets and meandering seems to be the main thing. Lots of people walk around looking at the ground or on their phones.

When I walk around, I have Daniel Craig playing James Bond in mind, and people seem to move out of my way for the most part. I didn't notice many chicks checking me out, 2 I think, and there were 2 or 3 yesterday too. I don't know if that's the walk or anything else, or just the law of averages. I mean if you walk around for long enough, you're going to walk past someone who likes the look of you, aren't you?

I dunno. I'm still not quite there yet, I do have to remind myself to stand up a bit more straight at times. But doing posture exercises as part of my daily exercise regime at the mo. And I'm going to look at the Code of the Natural posture stuff linked to in the Body Oriented Therapy article.

Conclusion - Posture, most dudes don't have great posture and don't have a commanding walk. I have read that it's one of the things that chicks notice about dudes. So, it's definitely important if you want to become an attractive man.

Next up, eye contact. I'll try to win 10 eye contact battles and see how people react.

I've been doing this for a while too, and girls 9 times out of 10 look down, almost never up. And sometimes I get a few seconds eye contact, but usually, it's quite short and she looks down. So, let's see how this goes this afternoon.

 

[Orgasmatron]

Day 3 - Eye Contact

Went out this afternoon, and it was pretty much the same as I'd been experiencing so far.

Chicks overwhelmingly tend to look down quickly after we make eye contact, and occasionally I get an eye contact hold for a second or 2 and then they look down. I don't know if this is a good thing or not.

I don't know what it's like elsewhere, but here in Scotland, people seem to be terrified to make eye contact with other people. I'm not an intimidating looking dude by any means, but when I look at people, especially chicks, they are often looking at the ground and desperately trying not to make eye contact with people. I don't know if it's just because we're so reserved and emotionally repressed here or if it's just normal.

Made eye contact with some dudes too, they broke pretty quickly, but tended to look sideways afterwards, one guy looked down.

I don't know what to make of any of that, but as it's something I've been practising for a while and am conscious of, I feel I'm pretty comfortable with the whole eye contact thing. I just try not to break first.

Tomorrow is about saying hi to girls. Got to do 6. I'm at work, so I've got the morning walk in, lunchtime, and the walk home. And I can always wander around near my flat for a bit, so I'll give it a go. If I can't do 6 tomorrow, then I'll just have to do 6 on Tuesday, so no moving on until I've done the day's challenge.

 

[Orgasmatron]

Day 4 - "Hi."

Well, I'm out in town, it's a nice afternoon. So, I've got to say hi to 6 cute chicks.

Well, pretty pathetic so far. After avoiding trying to do anything under the guise of 'shopping' I got lunch, then wandered aimlessly around the city for a few hours. Couldn't manage to say hi to anyone. It doesn't help that everyone stares at the ground or straight ahead or at their phone, but still, I don't get why I can't do this. And I can't blame other people for me being a pussy. Went to the park near the university, got a coffee and sat down on a bench beside a girl on her phone with headphones on, hoping she'd look up so I could say hi and get one under my belt. No luck, she got out a book and started to read whilst I sat drinking my coffee, pretending to do stuff on my phone and feeling super awkward, thinking I should ask her about her book or something, but obviously I didn't.

I'm starting to wonder if there is something wrong with me. Like, seriously, it shouldn't be this difficult. I'm an adult man and I can't say hello to girls. Going to stay out a bit longer, if only to punish myself until my feet hurt to much to continue.

It's really fucking annoying to feel so inept and pathetic.

I guess this is where a lot if dudes give up, but I reckon I just need to keep going and eventually I get so annoyed with myself I just do it.

Walked past a woman on my way home, not particularly attractive, made some eye contact and smiled, she smiled back, made my day. Man, do I suck.

 

[Orgasmatron]

A new plan is needed

I'm going to ditch the newbie assignment. I don't think wandering about and trying to say hi or how's your day going 6 times is really going to help me very much. My big issue is failing to approach and being a wuss, so even if I managed a hello, pretending that saying hi is some sort of achievement just lets me off the hook.

I haven't actually done a proper approach in 2 months. I lost the momentum I did have when I went and did some family stuff, got injured, did some more family stuff, then tried to go out and couldn't approach.

Currently, a typical day game session looks something like this:
Andrew gets ready to go out on Saturday, feels confident and optimistic, has an idea that he'll do tonnes of approaches and will get some numbers, which will lead to dates and sex. Andrew wanders round aimlessly for hours, looks at girls, thinks they look nice, continues to wander around and do nothing, gets increasingly frustrated, angry, depressed about this shit, goes home and resolves to do better tomorrow. Repeats this process on Sunday.

So that's pretty shit.

A couple of issues that suck and need to be fixed.

I have no friends. I have no social life. I don't seem to be able to approach.

I'm not happy about any of this. It fucking sucks, and I fucking suck too.

Really fucking annoyed about my total bullshit attempts to not suck and frustrated as fuck.

Not trying to be self-pitying and woe is me - just want this here as motivation to be better and to look back on when I actually do manage to make some progress.

 

[Skills]

A new plan is needed

I'm going to ditch the newbie assignment. I don't think wandering about and trying to say hi or how's your day going 6 times is really going to help me very much. My big issue is failing to approach and being a wuss, so even if I managed a hello, pretending that saying hi is some sort of achievement just lets me off the hook.

I haven't actually done a proper approach in 2 months. I lost the momentum I did have when I went and did some family stuff, got injured, did some more family stuff, then tried to go out and couldn't approach.

Currently, a typical day game session looks something like this:
Andrew gets ready to go out on Saturday, feels confident and optimistic, has an idea that he'll do tonnes of approaches and will get some numbers, which will lead to dates and sex. Andrew wanders round aimlessly for hours, looks at girls, thinks they look nice, continues to wander around and do nothing, gets increasingly frustrated, angry, depressed about this shit, goes home and resolves to do better tomorrow. Repeats this process on Sunday.

So that's pretty shit.

A couple of issues that suck and need to be fixed.

I have no friends. I have no social life. I don't seem to be able to approach.

I'm not happy about any of this. It fucking sucks, and I fucking suck too.

Really fucking annoyed about my total bullshit attempts to not suck and frustrated as fuck.

Not trying to be self-pitying and woe is me - just want this here as motivation to be better and to look back on when I actually do manage to make some progress.

dude you need the newbie assignment to get rid of approach anxiety...

The reason is seems silly is cause it is giving you baby steps, easy stuff to deal with aa... A year ago during corona, i did one of those with the mask on, it totally works...

 

[Orgasmatron]

dude you need the newbie assignment to get rid of approach anxiety...

The reason is seems silly is cause it is giving you baby steps, easy stuff to deal with aa... A year ago during corona, i did one of those with the mask on, it totally works...

Hey dude, you're right of course.
Tomorrow is another day. I need to learn some patience and stick with the program.

Cheers dude

 

[Starboy]

A new plan is needed

I'm going to ditch the newbie assignment. I don't think wandering about and trying to say hi or how's your day going 6 times is really going to help me very much. My big issue is failing to approach and being a wuss, so even if I managed a hello, pretending that saying hi is some sort of achievement just lets me off the hook.

I haven't actually done a proper approach in 2 months. I lost the momentum I did have when I went and did some family stuff, got injured, did some more family stuff, then tried to go out and couldn't approach.

Currently, a typical day game session looks something like this:
Andrew gets ready to go out on Saturday, feels confident and optimistic, has an idea that he'll do tonnes of approaches and will get some numbers, which will lead to dates and sex. Andrew wanders round aimlessly for hours, looks at girls, thinks they look nice, continues to wander around and do nothing, gets increasingly frustrated, angry, depressed about this shit, goes home and resolves to do better tomorrow. Repeats this process on Sunday.

So that's pretty shit.

A couple of issues that suck and need to be fixed.

I have no friends. I have no social life. I don't seem to be able to approach.

I'm not happy about any of this. It fucking sucks, and I fucking suck too.

Really fucking annoyed about my total bullshit attempts to not suck and frustrated as fuck.

Not trying to be self-pitying and woe is me - just want this here as motivation to be better and to look back on when I actually do manage to make some progress.

Look man I know your frustration we're in the same boat. I deal with the same issue myself. When I take time off from approaching the same fears and worries I had when I was a beginner who had never approached would come up again.

Even if I had plenty of references points and experiences from my past of approaches going well and women being nice to me and talking to me I still can worry about being too weird,uncalibrated,awkward etc. Our brains have a recency bias and only cares about what happens recently in our lives. It doesn't care if you approached a few hundred girls and nothing bad came from it. If you're more of a introverted guy and you take a break from doing game it will be harder for you to get back to the mind state you were in before.

I have periods of doubt and frustration too you can read in my journal. I approach a lot of women and even if I feel like i'm progressing and getting better I get back to square one.

It's important to watch your attitude. Saying you suck,your life sucks that self talk doesn't help you. You have to condition to yourself to think more positively otherwise you won't improve yourself or make progress. If in the back of your mind you have these kinds of thoughts while talking with women then chances are she's gonna pick up on this in your body language. Learn to meditate and do it every night or whenever you feel like shit.

 

[Orgasmatron]

Look man I know your frustration we're in the same boat. I deal with the same issue myself. When I take time off from approaching the same fears and worries I had when I was a beginner who had never approached would come up again.

Even if I had plenty of references points and experiences from my past of approaches going well and women being nice to me and talking to me I still can worry about being too weird,uncalibrated,awkward etc. Our brains have a recency bias and only cares about what happens recently in our lives. It doesn't care if you approached a few hundred girls and nothing bad came from it. If you're more of a introverted guy and you take a break from doing game it will be harder for you to get back to the mind state you were in before.

I have periods of doubt and frustration too you can read in my journal. I approach a lot of women and even if I feel like i'm progressing and getting better I get back to square one.

It's important to watch your attitude. Saying you suck,your life sucks that self talk doesn't help you. You have to condition to yourself to think more positively otherwise you won't improve yourself or make progress. If in the back of your mind you have these kinds of thoughts while talking with women then chances are she's gonna pick up on this in your body language. Learn to meditate and do it every night or whenever you feel like shit.

Hey dude,

Thanks, I appreciate you taking the time to post.
You are correct of course, negative self-talk never helps.
I'm usually pretty good with that, but just a bit frustrated at the moment and I let it get the better of me.

Funny you should mention meditation, as it's something I'm trying to do in the morning and night. I need to be more consistent with it though, and build it into my routine.

I'll read your journal too, I think seeing how all you other guys to deal with stuff will help

Thanks man

 

[Orgasmatron]

dude you need the newbie assignment to get rid of approach anxiety...

The reason is seems silly is cause it is giving you baby steps, easy stuff to deal with aa... A year ago during corona, i did one of those with the mask on, it totally works...

hey @Skills how did you get on with approaching with a mask? We still have to wear them here in stores, malls, bars which doesn't really help. I wouldn't even consider approaching with a mask tbh

 

[Orgasmatron]

Day 4 - "Hi." Take 2

Well, today was a lot better than yesterday. It did start off slow but picked up later on.

I didn't manage 6 "hi's", I did 3.
Well none of them were actually "hi's", there was an "I wouldn't fancy having one of those chase after me", a "That's a very small bag, what have you got in there?", and "Ahh, you're making healthy choices I see."

I did my usual aimless wandering, there were 3 or 4 girls I could've approached, but chickened out, which was annoying. But I resolved to stay positive and carry on. I decided to go to the museum.

"I wouldn't fancy having one of those chase after me"
Again, another chicken out in one part of the museum, the fashion exhibition, so I went to another part, the dinosaur and prehistoric bit. Saw a presumably good looking brunette, mid 20s? Nice figure and her ass looked great in her jeans. Hard to tell if she was pretty though, still have to wear stupid masks here FFS, I'm siding with she probably was. Anyway, she was making her way around the exhibit, I went ahead of her so she'd have to pass by, and she started looking at giant insect-type thing (trilobite maybe?)

so I said... "I wouldn't fancy having one of those chase after me".
Her - "they were actually about 30 times smaller than that"
Me - "Well I think I'd still be quite scared if it was chasing after me"
Her - "I would squash it"
Me - "wow you would just go straight in and kill it?"
Her - "yes. I would"
Me - "That's terrible, it's a living thing, you can't just kill it" PS not being serious here, mainly joking around.
Her - "yes I would, they're disgusting"

I noticed she had an accent, so I asked her about it - She was from Poland, and was just up from London to visit a friend. She was going back down the day after next. Talked about London briefly, she's not a fan, neither am I. I asked what she did there, did she like her job, and did she want to do anything else, she wants to be a dada analyst because of the money. She seems impressed I worked in marketing (I don't think it's very impressive but hey), she also asked my name and where I was from. I guess these are good signs. But I ran out of steam and didn't really know where to go after a bit. Anyway, she's off home in a day or two. I said if she was up for longer I'd have asked her out, wished her well and went on my way.

Good things
I made a start - probably could have done better, but it was a start.
Fun situational opener, was playful with the insect-killing thing, asked about hopes and dreams type stuff, and logistics question.
Discovered a new place to go to meet girls, especially tourist girls.
Did this despite masks.

Bad things
I don't really know how to structure my approach or what I'm supposed to be doing
probably bailed too early - wasn't sure if she was interested - and I was probably just coming across as a social guy not a sexual guy. Think I could've done better here, but was first approach in ages so I'm happy to have just said hello or whatever.


"That's a very small bag, what have you got in there?"
About to cross the road, saw a hot blonde, mid 30's, petite, slim, nice figure, very pretty, so I went over to where she was standing and crossed the road with her, when we got across I gestured to a gift bag she was carrying and said "That's a very small bag, what have you got in there?" It was skincare samples, I asked if she was treating herself, no they were gifts. The street was quite busy so we sort of got a bit split up by that, then some dude came over and I got distinct husband vibes from him so decided to split. She seemed nice though and was very hot.

"Ahh, you're making healthy choices I see."
In small local supermarket, saw (again masked so hard to tell) seemingly attractive women, 30ish, buying some fruit, so I went over and said "Ahh, you're making healthy choices I see." "I guess so" she said, "but I need to ignore the chocolate aisle right there. I said something about having to pretend it wasn't there too.

Anyway, so 3 interactions which were instigated by me and all went well, nothing bad happened, and it was quite nice talking to the girl in the museum, I think I may have been able to have taken that somewhere if it hadn't been my first approach in months, and felt pretty good about it all - I think that's the point of this exercise, rather than saying hello.

I've got 3 more basic interaction hello type approaches to do - I'll try on my lunch at work.

I feel a lot better now, so that's pretty good.

Thoughts/To do

• Need to work out what I'm supposed to do on an approach and how to structure things - what am I trying to achieve and how to do that?
• How to be sexy and not just social
• Go on trip advisor and find out the top places to go for tourists in Edinburgh - Where would you go if you were a chick who was visiting for a short while?

 

[Orgasmatron]

Day 4 - "Hi." Take 3

I hoped I could get passed this one today, but still can't do 6 hello's in a day. I live in a city, it shouldn't be this difficult surely. I'm finding it quite hard to find women who are on their own, are cute, and seem approachable - I think I mean if they are walking down a busy street on phone, listening to headphones etc then they aren't very approachable, but if they are standing around not doing much then they are.

So, went out this morning, warmed up by chatting with 2 sales assistants, both cute, when I bought some jeans and some cologne. I could make them both laugh and had a quick, nice conversation with each one (I realise they're paid to be nice to you, but anyway, I like to chat to them) Felt warmed up.

Did my usual wandering about but couldn't really see any opportunities to walk over and say hello, which is ridiculous because it's Saturday, in a city, and there are loads of people about.

Went to the museum, and saw a nice looking girl outside, eating ice-cream, with some luggage, looking at a statue of some guy, reading the inscription stuff. I hung about for a bit, nearby, tried to induce an AI, no luck.
So I went over and said "so, you must know all about this guy then?"
Her: not really
Me: it looked like you were reading all about him there
Her: some other stuff, I can't remember, it was about the statue.
Me: You sound like you're from Manchester
Her: Lancashire actually, so close.
So, chatted for a bit, she up to see her sister for a few days, told me where she'd been in the town so far, where she'd been the recently, she seemed nice and chatty. I liked her, she seemed cool.

I felt that I ran out of things to talk about after a while, didn't seem like it could've gone anywhere, as she's only in town for a short while and was staying with her sister, so I said I was going into the museum to look at old stuff.

Seems like running out of steam and bailing is what I do now. So I need to stop doing that.

I don't know how dudes manage to do 10 approaches in a day, I start off quite optimistic and believe that I'll do 10 easy, then it doesn't happen and I feel like a dick.

Anyway, I'm learning that girls like it when guys talk to them and they tend to respond pretty well. I just need to find more ways to start conversations. Although it is quite frustrating that I haven't managed much volume. I'm not going to get anywhere doing 1 a day.

Maybe tomorrow I'll do 6...maybe.


Some thoughts:

This happened last week with the girl I spoke to as well - Things seemed to be going well, she was enjoying talking to me, I was enjoying talking to her. There was a bit of a lull in the conversation when no-one said anything for a few seconds, which felt a bit awkward to me. I couldn't think of anything to say and felt that I'd run out of steam, so I said something to the effect of "well, it was nice speaking to you, goodbye" and ejected. And told myself that logistics were terrible anyway so nothing would've happened.

So, the main issues at the moment are...

1. Simply not doing very many approaches - It's not going to work, if I can't get this sorted out
2. Running out of stuff to say - What is it I'm supposed to be asking, doing, talking about? I don't know.
3. Ejecting when it feels awkward

Some things to work on and read about there I suppose

 

[Will_V]

Day 4 - "Hi." Take 3

I hoped I could get passed this one today, but still can't do 6 hello's in a day. I live in a city, it shouldn't be this difficult surely. I'm finding it quite hard to find women who are on their own, are cute, and seem approachable - I think I mean if they are walking down a busy street on phone, listening to headphones etc then they aren't very approachable, but if they are standing around not doing much then they are.

So, went out this morning, warmed up by chatting with 2 sales assistants, both cute, when I bought some jeans and some cologne. I could make them both laugh and had a quick, nice conversation with each one (I realise they're paid to be nice to you, but anyway, I like to chat to them) Felt warmed up.

Did my usual wandering about but couldn't really see any opportunities to walk over and say hello, which is ridiculous because it's Saturday, in a city, and there are loads of people about.

Went to the museum, and saw a nice looking girl outside, eating ice-cream, with some luggage, looking at a statue of some guy, reading the inscription stuff. I hung about for a bit, nearby, tried to induce an AI, no luck.
So I went over and said "so, you must know all about this guy then?"
Her: not really
Me: it looked like you were reading all about him there
Her: some other stuff, I can't remember, it was about the statue.
Me: You sound like you're from Manchester
Her: Lancashire actually, so close.
So, chatted for a bit, she up to see her sister for a few days, told me where she'd been in the town so far, where she'd been the recently, she seemed nice and chatty. I liked her, she seemed cool.

I felt that I ran out of things to talk about after a while, didn't seem like it could've gone anywhere, as she's only in town for a short while and was staying with her sister, so I said I was going into the museum to look at old stuff.

Seems like running out of steam and bailing is what I do now. So I need to stop doing that.

I don't know how dudes manage to do 10 approaches in a day, I start off quite optimistic and believe that I'll do 10 easy, then it doesn't happen and I feel like a dick.

Anyway, I'm learning that girls like it when guys talk to them and they tend to respond pretty well. I just need to find more ways to start conversations. Although it is quite frustrating that I haven't managed much volume. I'm not going to get anywhere doing 1 a day.

Maybe tomorrow I'll do 6...maybe.


Some thoughts:

This happened last week with the girl I spoke to as well - Things seemed to be going well, she was enjoying talking to me, I was enjoying talking to her. There was a bit of a lull in the conversation when no-one said anything for a few seconds, which felt a bit awkward to me. I couldn't think of anything to say and felt that I'd run out of steam, so I said something to the effect of "well, it was nice speaking to you, goodbye" and ejected. And told myself that logistics were terrible anyway so nothing would've happened.

So, the main issues at the moment are...

1. Simply not doing very many approaches - It's not going to work, if I can't get this sorted out
2. Running out of stuff to say - What is it I'm supposed to be asking, doing, talking about? I don't know.
3. Ejecting when it feels awkward

Some things to work on and read about there I suppose

Dude always pull the trigger, no matter what. It's good for the soul. Even if you run out of things to say just go 'I gotta run, but you seem cool, what do you say we catch up sometime?' even if there seems no chance. There's nothing to lose at that point, you're about to walk away forever so it changes nothing.

Also, with the hello thing, just imagine if someone said 'I'll give you $50 to say hi to some random stranger'. You'd just walk up, say hi, and walk back to collect the money, without caring about the response. This is no different. It's not important what the reaction is, the goal is to simply express yourself out into the world so that it doesn't seem strange any more.

For me personally, I very rarely do more than 5-10 approaches in one session. After that, unless I'm really enjoying myself for whatever reason, like I've had a great conversation or whatever, I find it starts to feel bland, I start to feel bored.

My suggestion would be focusing on whatever your sticking point is (like not going for the number no matter what) and doing it at least 3-4 times, that's what I find to be enough to make me feel a bit more comfortable the next day.

Remember when you have sticking points, it's not about her it's about you. All you have to do is your part to get past the sticking point. Like saying 'hi', it doesn't matter what the response is - you will have it for future reference - but the point is you achieved your objective, you could even just walk off if you want. Or if you keep bailing, just blithely going for the number when you have nothing left to say, it just trains you to know that you can depend on yourself not to be the one to waste an opportunity, even if she says 'no'.

 

[Skills]

Day 4 - "Hi." Take 3

I hoped I could get passed this one today, but still can't do 6 hello's in a day. I live in a city, it shouldn't be this difficult surely. I'm finding it quite hard to find women who are on their own, are cute, and seem approachable - I think I mean if they are walking down a busy street on phone, listening to headphones etc then they aren't very approachable, but if they are standing around not doing much then they are.

So, went out this morning, warmed up by chatting with 2 sales assistants, both cute, when I bought some jeans and some cologne. I could make them both laugh and had a quick, nice conversation with each one (I realise they're paid to be nice to you, but anyway, I like to chat to them) Felt warmed up.

Did my usual wandering about but couldn't really see any opportunities to walk over and say hello, which is ridiculous because it's Saturday, in a city, and there are loads of people about.

Went to the museum, and saw a nice looking girl outside, eating ice-cream, with some luggage, looking at a statue of some guy, reading the inscription stuff. I hung about for a bit, nearby, tried to induce an AI, no luck.
So I went over and said "so, you must know all about this guy then?"
Her: not really
Me: it looked like you were reading all about him there
Her: some other stuff, I can't remember, it was about the statue.
Me: You sound like you're from Manchester
Her: Lancashire actually, so close.
So, chatted for a bit, she up to see her sister for a few days, told me where she'd been in the town so far, where she'd been the recently, she seemed nice and chatty. I liked her, she seemed cool.

I felt that I ran out of things to talk about after a while, didn't seem like it could've gone anywhere, as she's only in town for a short while and was staying with her sister, so I said I was going into the museum to look at old stuff.

Seems like running out of steam and bailing is what I do now. So I need to stop doing that.

I don't know how dudes manage to do 10 approaches in a day, I start off quite optimistic and believe that I'll do 10 easy, then it doesn't happen and I feel like a dick.

Anyway, I'm learning that girls like it when guys talk to them and they tend to respond pretty well. I just need to find more ways to start conversations. Although it is quite frustrating that I haven't managed much volume. I'm not going to get anywhere doing 1 a day.

Maybe tomorrow I'll do 6...maybe.


Some thoughts:

This happened last week with the girl I spoke to as well - Things seemed to be going well, she was enjoying talking to me, I was enjoying talking to her. There was a bit of a lull in the conversation when no-one said anything for a few seconds, which felt a bit awkward to me. I couldn't think of anything to say and felt that I'd run out of steam, so I said something to the effect of "well, it was nice speaking to you, goodbye" and ejected. And told myself that logistics were terrible anyway so nothing would've happened.

So, the main issues at the moment are...

1. Simply not doing very many approaches - It's not going to work, if I can't get this sorted out
2. Running out of stuff to say - What is it I'm supposed to be asking, doing, talking about? I don't know.
3. Ejecting when it feels awkward

Some things to work on and read about there I suppose

As you can see you not always need to force an ai, your opening was awesome, situational, look how when you open situational like that, shit! seems to flow better and seem more natural and spontaneous and women hook....

You should have flirted by saying something such as "i am going to be your tour guide" or "after you meet me and get to know me you are never going back" don't be afraid to escalate the convo , flirt, or/and get a bit touchi calibrated

 

[Skills]

hey @Skills how did you get on with approaching with a mask? We still have to wear them here in stores, malls, bars which doesn't really help. I wouldn't even consider approaching with a mask tbh

yes, it is more challenging but duable:

 

[Orgasmatron]

Dude always pull the trigger, no matter what. It's good for the soul. Even if you run out of things to say just go 'I gotta run, but you seem cool, what do you say we catch up sometime?' even if there seems no chance. There's nothing to lose at that point, you're about to walk away forever so it changes nothing.

Also, with the hello thing, just imagine if someone said 'I'll give you $50 to say hi to some random stranger'. You'd just walk up, say hi, and walk back to collect the money, without caring about the response. This is no different. It's not important what the reaction is, the goal is to simply express yourself out into the world so that it doesn't seem strange any more.

For me personally, I very rarely do more than 5-10 approaches in one session. After that, unless I'm really enjoying myself for whatever reason, like I've had a great conversation or whatever, I find it starts to feel bland, I start to feel bored.

My suggestion would be focusing on whatever your sticking point is (like not going for the number no matter what) and doing it at least 3-4 times, that's what I find to be enough to make me feel a bit more comfortable the next day.

Remember when you have sticking points, it's not about her it's about you. All you have to do is your part to get past the sticking point. Like saying 'hi', it doesn't matter what the response is - you will have it for future reference - but the point is you achieved your objective, you could even just walk off if you want. Or if you keep bailing, just blithely going for the number when you have nothing left to say, it just trains you to know that you can depend on yourself not to be the one to waste an opportunity, even if she says 'no'.

Thanks dude, that really helps put things in perspective.

Thanks for the sticking point advice too. I'll try that.
Yeah, you're right, I've got an objective and I need to just focus on doing that and not worry about the results.

Cheers

 

[Orgasmatron]

As you can see you not always need to force an ai, your opening was awesome, situational, look how when you open situational like that, shit! seems to flow better and seem more natural and spontaneous and women hook....

You should have flirted by saying something such as "i am going to be your tour guide" or "after you meet me and get to know me you are never going back" don't be afraid to escalate the convo , flirt, or/and get a bit touchi calibrated

Thanks man.

Cool, yeah I need to start doing things like that, those would be good here, lots of tourists, thanks for the suggestions and the video.

Cheers dude