PH's Daygame: I meet girls.

[phuasjn2]

Dinner Date
Plan
Coffee Dinner > Shopping > Ice cream > Pull
She was busy with work and no one drinks coffee at night

Brief summary
I wore a new shirt. It was thicc. Felt like having a heat injury wearing it. I was barely attracted to the girl today, as her text lacked confidence and her looks weren't great either. I went anyway for the practice.

Factors positive (+)
- Did a push pull in Chinese
M: We should jog together since we both like jogging
H: Laughs
M: How many times a week do u jog
H: 4 times a week
M: Wow that's crazy. I don't think I can keep up. Maybe 1 time a week we jog together, the rest u jog by yourself haha

Factors negative (-)
- Uncomfortable shirt, too hot
- Having to speak in Chinese and translate material on the fly
- Not being fully attracted to her
- Being too excited and too much unnecessary movement -> Needs to be more poised. Focus attention onto her before eating.

 

[phuasjn2]

Date

Date plan

Push pull
1) I think we look good together, wait are you wearing those [clothes/accessory] ok then we can't be together anymore. Then again u seem really fit and toned. I think I can make an exception for you.
2) Talking about beaches
M: I love the beaches in Phuket, they take me back to a simpler time. They create a really relaxed environment. It's the best feeling being there with someone close and just enjoying the moment spent with each other, hearing the waves seeing the water.
H: Yeah I really like the beaches too, the other time I went ...
M: We can both go to the beaches together. Imagine us just lying down on a beach bench looking at the sky and drinking tea
H: Yeah we can even go swimming
M: Salty haha. I don't want to swim. Go without me.

Chase frame
1) Show me your dance video. Watch her dance video and say. Cool dance moves. We just met today and you are already showing off your body to me.
2)
M: Tell me about your favorite food.
H: I like Japanese food and sushi
M: Wow, tell me what sushi do u know?
H: Sashimi, tuna, swordfish
M: Oooh trying to show off your food knowledge to me. My favorite is sashimi

Screening
1) Do you travel?
2) Have you ever played an instrument?

Qualifying
1)
H: Yeah I like travelling
M: That's really cool, I like people who travel because they are adventurous, and willing to try new things. It's like being a kid again, curious and exploring new things.
2)
H: Yeah I have ever played a clarinet
M: Oh wow, that's so unexpected. I love hearing and playing music. Whenever I play my ukulele I feel like time flies and I just enjoy myself endlessly

Compliance
1) Show me ur necklace/hand
2) Turn around, let me see your dress from behind
3) Sit closer, let me see what ur typing

Date plan
Dinner -> Shop -> Drinks/Ice cream -> Her home
Additional stops if needed: Park

Queuing for the restaurant
Opened her in the mall where I was queuing in the restaurant where we decide to eat. She walked past me and didn't recognize me. Then I turned around and saw her staring at me. Today I was focused on being more stoned-face and showing less interest to prevent myself from being seen as too eager and interested.

Me: Hey are you xxx?
Her: Yeah, are you xxx?
Me: Yeah, I thought u had yellow hair, should've been super obvious
Her: Yellow hair? Blonde u mean, yeah I used to have that.
Me: Brown hair looks good too, where did u dye it?
Her: In some hair salon.

(pause)

Me: How are you?
Her: I'm good, how are you?
Me: I'm good too. I saw your airplane photo and you seem to really like travelling
Her: Yeah I travel to a lot of places
Me: Which places are you going next?
Her: Melbourne to Sydney
Me: Sounds fun (Missed opportunity here to qualify her on her travelling)

(pause)

Her: Do you travel yourself?
Me: Yeah I have been to Thailand
Her: Other places?
Me: And Malaysia
Her: Only these 2?
Me: Yeah, I don't travel often.
Her: Nowadays I also never, it's been 3 years
Me: The pandemic is stopping us

(pause)

Seated inside restaurant (Facing each other)
Then we talk about food and then took a seat inside the restaurant. I moved my water away from my desk so that I can focus on her instead of the water. I asked her to move closer as the restaurant was noisy and she complied, moving her chair a little closer to me.

We didn't have the best conversation, it kept stopping, as we took some time to eat in between.

Me: What do you do in your travels?
Her: Usually I go and eat and go visit the tourist places, then I will go shopping
Me: I like the food, especially Western food in most places like fish and chip
Her: Yeah Australia serve fish and chip everyday, eat until bored
Me: What else do u do, got go theme parks to play?
Her: Yeah not this time though, the other time I went to Goldcoast Australia
Me: Nice sounds like you like theme parks
Her: Yeah I like theme parks.
Me: Have you been to the USS?
Her: Yeah I been there plenty of times
Me: I really like the feeling of riding cylon when I was there
Her: Cylon is the red one right
Me: Yeah. I was so surprised when I sat it and it started ridiculously fast, I wasn't ready when it launched me right off my seat to the start
Her: Haha yeah that one was fast
Me: Yeah, really unexpected that one, I was used to the old school roller coasters

(pause)

Me: What do you do for fun in the weekends?
Her: I mainly watch dramas and go out with friends
Me: I watch dramas too like 90 day fiance
Her: Isn't that more of a reality tv show
Me: Yeah I guess, but it also has lots of drama
Her: Oh yeah I only remember them saying. "I like the view" and "You are my best view"
Me: You talking about Big Ed and Liz is it?
Her: Yeah Big Ed and Rose
Me: Rose is his first girlfriend, 2nd girlfriend is Liz.
Her: Ohh yeah
Me: It's really awkward, it's like a train wreck, just can't look away.
Her: Yeah

We finished our meal and then I went to the toilet. Reconnected with her saying I wanted to eat some dessert. We eventually began walking to the next location. We got stopped by a pancake shop in the 2nd floor of the basement.

Eating pancakes (Facing each other)
We ordered pancakes and started chatting again

Me: How did u first started working?
Her: Me you mean my intern work or my after graduation?
Me: Yeah the first time that you work where was it?
Her: I worked as an analyst

We talked about our jobs, she specifically wanted me to share my profession because I have been pretty vague about it up till now. I teased her a little about having to exercise after the massive pancake that we just ate.

Seated in public (Side by side)

Talking about Thailand
Me: The other time I went Thailand with a friend it was super last minute.
Her: What was it like?
Me: I went there and we went to Bangkok. There were some ladies there who were very excited to meet us. We walked past a massage parlor. There was this lady who tried to hold my hand and pull me in. For like 1 minute they were trying to pull me in.
Her: Haha these people only want your money only
Me: Have you ever felt that way?
Her: They only pull guys in la

(pause)

Me: Have you ever felt like you were forced to do something even though u may not want to?
Her: So I went on a date with this guy and we went drinking and then he got a little drunk at the end of the date. He tried to pull me into the handicapped toilet.
Me: Oh no, sounds like u didn't want to but he wanted to
Her: Luckily I was standing behind him so he couldn't shut me in.
Me: Yeah that's ridiculous sia
Her: He nearly raped me. If I was standing in front it would have been a different story
Me: Yeah maybe, but u also can unlock the door and run ma.
Her: What if he close the door and shut me in.
Me: Yeah
Her: That's why now I very scared to go to the toilet, I make sure the guy goes in front of me.

(pause)

Me: Let me see your tik tok
Her: See it on your phone
Me: I don't even have tik tok downloaded yet.
Her: My tik tok have a lot of personal stuff, like those honey trap
Me: Ah, u have been surfing a ton of naughty stuff on tik tok
Her: No la I mean the thirst trap. You ownself go back download and see

(pause)

I tried to setup another date. Kept thinking what she does and enjoy to set up another date. She watched drama, have a background of dance from a long time ago, loves theme parks, likes travelling, hates hiking, plays bowling/darts but not that into it. Ended up thinking we could a movie together for another date.

We walked back to the train station. As we went up the escalator I held her arm and tried to turn her body. She resisted. Then as we reached the top I opened my arms to signal a hug but she rejected and said bye. Needless to say the ending was bad

Strengths
1) Used low voice mostly
2) Facial expression calm, not eager to please. Could use more questioning looks to encourage her contributing to the conversation

Weaknesses
1) Did not follow date plans at all -> Only 1 time teasing her sexually
2) Chase frames 0, push pull 0, screen and qualifying 1.
3) Not speaking on emotional level

 

[phuasjn2]

Date
Oh man date reports are really long. Is there a faster way to do this. I'm giving myself 30 minutes.

Met through bumble.
Looks bigger than the photos, fat thighs
Personality wise great. Does a lot of hobbies. Goes to church, but may question it's beliefs

Date plan
Opener -> Coffee/tea -> bowling -> home

Opener
I opened her while facing the wall. Her body was half tilted towards me, half wanting to walk off.

M = me, H = Her
M: Hey you must be xxx, you look great today
H: Hi

She signalled with her head to go forward to the coffee/tea session, but I stopped her.

M: Lets talk first.
H: Ok, sorry I was late, got caught delivering some audio circuit board for the church
M: Woa, didn't know you were expert at audio technologies
H: Haha not really, I just supposed to give them. The people in my church will repair the speakers
M: Didn't know u went to church
H: Yeah, I go to the xxx church nearby here, but I don't go to the other church like the one in the news
M: That's interesting, got different beliefs is it?
H: The way the pope inteprets the bible. It's different in my church. In the other church, they intepret it in whatever way they want, so it's not as god's word
M: Yeah, that's bad. I don't go to church myself, but the one time I went it was weird. I went to this church nearby her as well
H: So you went to the church near here too?
M: Yeah but it's a different church. When I went there, it was dark in the large auditorium. People were dancing with bible music playing.
H: What, yeah it's this different interpretation.
M: I mean there were chairs and all
H: Yeah, you shouldn't have to experience that
M: It's not bad, it's just weird haha

With that we went on the date as I felt we talk enough about the church. We went to the coffeeshop and ordered our drinks. Did some fluff talk while walking, about the church, where she stayed, whether she came to the mall etc. She talked about travel once and I said I didn't like it, as we haven't explored our home country yet. Then I changed the topic.

Coffeeshop
We were seated 90 degrees from each other, it was great.

Topics discussed
I emphasized a lot about my feelings about my job in healthcare, feelings of playing my music (angklung and ukulele), feelings of reading self-help books. She was also talking about her job, how she worked with the elderly, comparing the music that we like (pop music and "romantic" music)

Our conversation twist and turned, from movies in 1990s to the latest blockbusters, to our childhood school days, to the hobbies that we have in those childhoods.

Facial expression
Something that I played around with in this date was facial expression. I had a mild skeptical look when questioning her, until I feel she satisfactorily answers me, then I felt satisfied and expressed a delightful smile. When it was her asking me questions, I would let my feelings guide me in my answers and express the feelings while answering. As much as possible I avoid those "boring questions", like factual questions, processes.

Transition
Transition to bowling was bad. We both finished our drinks already. I felt like asking and I waited, so there was this unnecessary pause for several seconds. It felt really long. Then I randomly asked her

M: Lets go bowling
(pause)
H: Sure, where is it though?
M: It's at [place]
H: Ok, what are you doing after this?

Bowling
Not much to say here, except she is really good for someone who didn't played in years. I taught her how to play and she was a natural. We connected on the high points. It may have increased her interest a little bit, but overall I don't really feel that it helped the seduction process much.

Home?
I thought about it. We haven't kissed or even hug. So far we only did some incidental touching here and there, with me guiding her directions. No sex talk too. That's something I did before to some success previously, will implement in the next date.

Logistics was viable, I had about 3 hours till her next destination.

I decided to wait for next date. So I cut short the date. It was about 6pm

H: Where shall we go now?
M: Lets go back, you need to prepare for your [event] in the evening.

More fluff talk ensued as well continued on the train till the intersection. I felt connected to her facial expressions. As we are about to leave I wanted to hug her on the escalator. I held her and felt resistance. Decided against pulling her as she may feel unsafe on the escalator.

M: Alright where are u going next
H: I'm going to that exit
M: Ok I'm going the other side
H: Lets catch up again soon
M: Lets catch up again some other time

Let's see how this goes next time

 

[Railer]

Something that I played around with in this date was facial expression. I had a mild skeptical look when questioning her, until I feel she satisfactorily answers me, then I felt satisfied and expressed a delightful smile.

That sounds impactful. Congrats on the many moves too.

 

[phuasjn2]

Day 40
Another day, another insta-date

I really should be trying to K-close these girls. On the bright side I finally started sexy talk.

Opened 6 girls today. The first 5 girls were walking approaches. They were too mobile and I didn't stop them. I was rusty, haven't been going out for approaching in like 2 weeks. I was thinking this time it was going to be bad since my initial approaches kept failing. I was pleasantly surprised

I was walking and saw a girl in front of me wearing a black top and blue short jeans. My mood was down as I didn't click with the first 5 girls that I talked to today so I wasn't particularly excited. I followed her nonetheless. She went into a female clothing shop and I was hesitant to enter the shop and make the approach. I walked half pass the shop, turned around and saw a banner. I was like fuck it lets approach her. I didn't even see what she looked like but I knew I would commit to the approach no matter what.

She was wearing a black top with shiny sparkly pearls on the shirt and blue short jeans. Probably in her 30s.

Indirect direct (InDi) approach

M: Actually I just thought ur hair was really cute
H: Thank you
M: You don't seem like ur from around here. Where are u from?
H: I'm from Indonesia. Where are you from?

I cheekily said I'm from Indonesia as well. The look of doubt on her face was so funny I couldn't help laughing

M: You caught me haha. I was just kidding, I'm from Singapore
H: Yeah, u look abit but I think u Singaporean
M: So what brought you out today?

She started facing the clothes and touch them, turning attention away from me.

H: Today's my off day so I want to see some clothes
M: I see

I felt like I was losing her attention so I turned and asked her to see this clothes. I took a black dress and said

M: hey this looks really fitting on you. Do you like dresses with buttons
H: Haha that one can't fit me, I need M size

I turned around seeing her body. Nah she's not an M size.

M: Can fit u see ur waist small
H: Yeah it will be tight
M: Fitting is good, it can show off your body and look great

She started moving a little away to the next clothing. I felt like she was leading me and I was following and I didn't like the dynamic

M: Hey lets go take a walk.

(pause)

H: I want to see this clothes. (She said half convincingly)
M: We can go to another shop
H: Ok

Insta-date
And that was the start of the insta-date. Other female customers in the shop were staring at me but I couldn't care less.

So we started walking along a corridor. As we walked I could feel she was increasingly walking closer to me. I put my hand on her waist by the time we finished walking across the corridor.

She was flirty asking a lot of personal questions like my age, where I work etc. I didn't tell her yet, and she was like ur so young. I rebutted saying I was old enough.

M: Lets go to the coffee shop around here. There is starbuck and there's is Joe and dough.
H: Ok

We went to the Joe and Dough coffee shop and we ordered our drinks. I decided to pay for her as I felt she didn't earn too much. She was thankful.

We started off with her asking about my age question. Apparently she was 36. I had her guess my age. She guessed right, but I said I was 3 years older. No matter what she said I was going to say I was 3 years older than that, making it feel like I am older than she expected. She said that guys can never be too old unless above 40.

I drank my tea while she drank her cappuccino. I complimented her watch and got her to show me her tik tok videos. Unfortunately she wasn't a dancer so I showed mild disapproval, but I like that she still does tik tok it makes her seem young.

We ended faster than usual as I needed to go for an early dinner to make it for gym. We had about 30 minutes together as she needed to go home too. Before that we exchanged numbers and will go to the beach together another time.

Definitely had the opportunity to bounce her again and try to K-close if I didn't have anything on. I felt it was still an amazing attempt since I haven't daygame for awhile.

In other news
Asked a colleague out while at work on Sunday 21/8/22. She was interested. Already planned a date by the end of the shift.

 

[phuasjn2]

Date
K-close
Went on a date with a girl I met on day game.

Strengths
- Well planned. Coffee -> Rooftop park -> Move to another mall to have dinner

Weaknesses
1) Showing too much interest.
Evidence:
Tried to K-close, she deflected.
Did not go all the way back to neutral position, still leaning in a bit and tried to K-close again after 1 minute. She deflected again.

Ideally:
Try to K-close, she deflect.
Slowly lean back to neutral position.
Continue deep diving about her instead.
Only go back if you feel her compliance level is comfortable enough

Eventually I found out my mistake because there was a black reflective surface in front where we were seating. The non-compliance was bad that she didn't want to talk about herself. I had to lean back from her, sit normally and start talking about a short story of myself. I then asked her about herself. She was non-compliant again. I gave her a skeptical look while turning slowly away and she started a story of herself.

2) Sometimes fail to punish non-compliance
Evidence:
M: Take off your mask
H: Shakes her head*
M: You gonna have to take a drink
H: Shakes her head*
(chasing her)

Ideally:
M: Take off your mask
H: Shakes her head*
M: Bored look* slowly drifting attention away.
M: So what brings you to [thread cut]

3) Competitive vibe in conversation
Evidence:
H: What's your age?
M: I'm old already. How about you
H: Same.
M: Show me your IC first

She takes out her card. I opened my palm to signal her to give it. She didn't want to hand it, flipped it around me. My hand chased her hand. Really unnecessary now that I think about it. Supposed to be using my bored look.

We got to the point where she wouldn't let me talk about the accessories she was wearing. It was like I was encouraging the non-compliance

 

[tearsofjoy]

Hey man, been lurking around in your journal for a bit but just wanted to say inspirational stuff! I think you're a few steps ahead of me in terms of my journey as a seducer, so it's awesome to see you going for the insta date and not afraid to escalate on dates, etc.

 

[phuasjn2]

Day 41
I haven't been going on sarges for a long while in my standards (1 week). Recently the game I was playing had a major update and I was totally hooked onto their new raids 3. Played it for about a week continuously and haven't been active on this forum. I loved the game but I hated the after effects. I knew that in 1 year from now, I wouldn't give 2 hoots about the game and would much rather have a full platter of F-buddies. That's why I decided to change, to limit my gaming time to after 5pm. I knew the reason to stop gaming, but changing behaviors is really tough. Today I downloaded an app to help me on my journey, even paid for the full version to limit behaviors are not helpful for my self-progression.

Moving on to today's sarge.

Another day, another instadate. This time with 2 girls who are sisters on a vacation who was shopping at a sports shop selling sneakers.

I notice I change my sarging location and that led to better results. Previously I used to sarge at the meeting points, those places near the bus stops, train station exit ways, and other places where people are expecting to meet someone. I did that because I wanted easier to approach stationary targets who are standing or seated. Nowadays, I avoid sarging in those places. One of the main reasons is that there is a good chance you would be interrupted by their friends, boyfriends etc. I find big shopping malls with large individual stores to be much preferable, as most girls shop alone and they usually don't have much time constraints, which means it's much easier to move her and take her on an instadate.

For instance today I went out and opened this brown haired girl looking at some clothes by herself. I was lucky and she opened really well. I used my indirect-direct (InDi) opener

M: Do you know where [mall] is?
H: It is here
M: Actually I find that your hair is really cool and I wanted to talk to you
H: Haha
M: Where are you from, you don't seem like you are from around here

She didn't hear what I said and she leaned in closer to me, turning her head slightly to the left. I repeated myself slightly louder and she smiled and told me her home country Philippines while I told her I was local. I asked her name and she asked mine. Apparently she was here on vacation with her sister till Saturday. We stood really close together and she started to ask me for wifi connection.

M: We just met and you are already asking me for connections

She didn't catch the chase frame. I shared my phone's connection anyway. Then something unexpected happened.

H: My sister is over there. She asks me who you are. I said I just met you.
M: Oh I see. Let me add you on whatsapp (I didn't really know what to say. I mean I am used to dating 1 girls, but 2 and sisters?)

Her sister came over and I was in between both of them. She took my number and texted me.

H: So what brought you here?
M: I was here to do some shopping and grab some food. If you are hungry, lets eat together!
H: My sister is hungry too.
M: Alright lets go then.
H: Wait I think she wants to buy something.

She spoke to her sister before agreeing to go to eat together with me. This was the part where I talked too much. The walk to the food area started well, with her walking really close to me and I held her waist initially, with her sister being the 3rd party. I remembered having to talk more on transition points, but she didn't understand me too well so the more I talked the more she felt the disconnect.

H: I stay at [place] because it was the cheaper place to go
M: I know we should go to somewhere cheap. Lets go to Mc donalds, or we can go to the hawker centre but it has no aircon.

I seldom recommend fast food for dates but if that's what they prefer I don't mind. She didn't understand hawker centre and repeated "no aircon".

H: Is it inside this mall?
M: Yeah its around here.

During the walk I felt she was increasingly distance physically so I asked her questions. None of them were sticking, but they trusted my lead and I lead them to the place. We went to the ordering kiosk and I ordered our food.

M: What do u want to eat
H: Same as you
M: You sure? I am really healthy one u know, u sure u want corn?
H: Sure, wait I want fries

Her sister was next. She said she didn't eat burgers. Ooof. At least she eats nuggets so we ordered that for her. No curry. We took a seat and I asked them to repay me the food cost. I noticed her finger having a golden ring and touched it physically.

M: That's a nice ring. Are you married?
H: Haha, nope

We talked for a while and her sister abruptly said they had to go somewhere for work. Well, maybe she didn't like being the 3rd wheel there. So they changed the order to takeaway. I didn't want to follow them so I insisted on eating in the shop.

What a day! Didn't expect to insta-date again so soon after a long break

 

[phuasjn2]

Summary/progress	June	July	August
Days of sarging	18	13	11
Number close	9	2	9
Dates	5 online 0 day game	4 online 0 day game	2 Day game 4 Instadates 3 Online dates
K close	0	0	1
F close	0	0	0

It took awhile, but day game is finally becoming rewarding. Feels good. Onwards to the next month!

 

[phuasjn2]

Went out on a date on 6th Sept with the girl I K-closed previously, brought. Tried to go for the close, but she resisted. I took it easy, restarted again 5 minutes later but still not really gaining traction.

Another 1st date on 7th Sept, she wasn't really comfortable with touches.

Day 42
Trying out some new openers today. Direct in nature compared to before. Opened about 4 girls but none let to much substantial conversation as I ejected. Getting lazy to do long journals. Got to restart the habit.

 

[phuasjn2]

Wow it's already October. Ngl I had been lazy and took most of this week off. To be fair, I also got sick for like 2 weeks and grandpa passed away so that's another week of prayers.

Going to start sarging again, 1 day at a time.

 

[phuasjn2]

Day 43
Omg the approach anxiety is back. Its just like the first day again, compliments and stuck after 1 line.

Approached 2 girls today.

 

[phuasjn2]

Day 44
Half day today since I was going to be going to the gym directly after sarging. Took a long time to get started sarging, partly because I wasn't approaching well and also there was not many people about at lunch time at that shopping area. Approached another 2 girls. This time one was a conversation at least. Opened her with the earrings she was buying saying it was really nice and big and that her type must be big earrings. She said she didn't work there. I told her I know and I picked up another earrings to ask her if it was big enough.

Yeah just some idle chatter. The other girl was older and I just opened her for the sake of opening. Onward to better days!

 

[jentle]

@phuasjn2 Hey wondering if u are still sarging?