Long-Term Satisficers vs. Maximizers

[Chase]

I ran a poll on X.com to see what % of men are satisficers vs. what percent are maximizers. 297 guys voted.

x.com

x.com

Result: 60/40 split satisficers vs. maximizers.

If you're unfamiliar with the terms:

• Satisficers are men who prefer comfort and ease over having "the best." They will opt for the lower maintenance less attractive girl over the more attractive but higher maintenance one.
  
  
• Maximizers are men who prefer having "the best" over comfort and ease. They will opt for the more attractive but higher maintenance girl over the lower maintenance less attractive one.

There's a study on these preferences that is pretty enlightening... the researchers found that maximizers get happier the hotter their wives are, while satisficers actually get happier the uglier their wives are

I probably want to write an article on this topic at some point.

For now, I think it's an interesting point worth considering whenever this topic of "which chick to choose for a long-term settled LTR" comes up.

There was a bit more discussion of the topic on X in this thread.

Chase

 

[TomInHo]

That poll you did was interesting, but I have some questions because...

If you say attractive girls are always a lot of trouble, how do you explain girls who are pretty but also easy to get along with?

Do you think they don't exist? And what about girls who are mid but are still a massive headache? Do you think those girls don't exist either?

Could it be that if you think pretty girls are always difficult, you might only notice the girls who are difficult, and ignore the easygoing ones? Or maybe secretly more attracted to difficult women?

One of the studies you referenced says more attractive women want a man with both good genes & resources. But then it also states at the end that MOST women want that, not just pretty ones—so which is it?

Also, looking at the study, it relied on how men rated attractiveness. But isn’t it possible that narcissistic women, who invest more in their appearance, could be skewing the data?

Research like the one titled, "Do Objective and Peer-perceived Qualities Moderate the Relationship Between Narcissism and Social Outcomes?" shows that narcissistic women are often perceived as more attractive

Probably because women with those traits tend to spend more time on grooming and their appearance

Therefore when a man is rating a woman on attractiveness there is a possibility he could also rating her based on narcissistic traits without his knowledge. This could potentially skew the data collected and conclusions in your first study

Because some people could have be rating on narcissism rather than just objective beauty.

Meaning that even if there were attractive women who were not demanding, the presence of a smaller number of highly demanding narcissistic women could have significantly raised the average perceived "high-maintenance" score for the "attractive" category

And this is especially true when the sample size of the study is not large. The study you used only had 214 participants

Therefore, isn't it possible there will be beautiful women that don't also display those narcissistic traits and might be easy to get along with?

The premise is interesting, but it seems like it presents a false dichotomy that doesn't address some complexities of human attraction. Which leaves strong potential for confirmation bias

 

[Skills]

That survey/study makes no sense i agree with thominho....

Going into red pill territory(i am worry about you chase hanging out in twitter too much).... chase please tell me that you going to twitter is not brain washing you...

You can have a really hot girl (your 8 or above) and be low drama, cool, chill etc... the characteristic you are giving the 6

you can have a troll or a mid, 6 that is a massive drama, pain in the ass (the characteristics you give to the 9)....

with that being said most guys that i seen in 20 years in the community usually make main(the 8 range) to their particular taste, seems to be their sweet spot....

Also i would love to know who here is goes "let me marry a 6" cause she is low drama blah blah

most guys make main their onitis.... (at least i do), due to onitis, or good screening (she was the best out of the different girls you were saying)... Usually tends to happen every 3 years or so, for my experience and what i have witness...

 

[PaulieFlyn10]

Each time this conversation comes people always say: "There are 9s & 10s who are low maintenance... less of a headache and less drama. They exist"

Yet... I've been in the pick up space and I haven't seen guys get low drama 9s & 10s as partners. Not saying they don't exist...

But then again why are very few me (read: almost no one) dating them.

 

[TomInHo]

Each time this conversation comes people always say: "There are 9s & 10s who are low maintenance... less of a headache and less drama. They exist"

Yet... I've been in the pick up space and I haven't seen guys get low drama 9s & 10s as partners. Not saying they don't exist...

But then again why are very few me (read: almost no one) dating them.

Ok so first we need to address somethings

What exactly is a low vs high maintenance woman? I think getting clear on both definitions can help with confusion

Because what one person considers 'high maintenance' might be another's 'normal.'

Secondly I recently had a friend show me the girl he was dating. He rated her a 9 but on my scale she was a 7. But is either of us wrong in how we view her attractiveness?

Based on the initial logic my friends GF will be BOTH low drama and high maintenance depending on who is looking at her. Plus have dated women I was extremely attracted to and they weren't a headache to manage and we didn't have massive flare ups. Those relationships dissolved when I didn't want to commit further

Think there's more nuance when it comes to relationships personally and broad generalizations can be limiting

 

[topcat]

Based on the initial logic my friends GF will be BOTH low drama and high maintenance depending on who is looking at her.

Schrödinger’s Bitch

 

[Skills]

Each time this conversation comes people always say: "There are 9s & 10s who are low maintenance... less of a headache and less drama. They exist"

Yet... I've been in the pick up space and I haven't seen guys get low drama 9s & 10s as partners. Not saying they don't exist...

But then again why are very few me (read: almost no one) dating them.

what is drama (the king of drama talk bd definition):

"Drama – Any harsh negative actions directed from a woman to man where the man is the target of said negativity. Screaming, nagging, complaining, arguing, demands, crying “at you”, threats, ultimatums, the “silent treatment”, refusing sex because of non-medical reasons, all of these things are drama, and there are many others. Drama is not “anything negative”. Specifically, it must be harsh (sweetly lying would not be considered drama) and focused at the man (angrily complaining about her boss at work would not be considered drama). Drama is a female trait. (Men have guy-drama.)"


^ this will happen with most women unless is a dude, but any seducer dating the girls should be able to handle the "drama" to the point that she starts getting in line, get frustrated and complies........ Or she is out..... No saying guys will not get the occasional drama due to seducers are a pain in the ass to date(specially the sleeping around and no committing)..... Seducers are the most difficult partners to deal with even with other seducers, imagine a women having to deal with nutcases like us... Have you ever been in a seduction chat with top guys, you will kill yourself or have a multiple mental break downs.....

But seducers are difficult to deal with.... Girls have to deal with a lot of shit, is not easy for a women.... And even then they usually comply and stay in line or go to your frame, or get frustrated and leave.... it does not matter the rating...

as i said i seen the guys usually with the 8 sweet spot... But i seen 9s and 10s (specially does 18-23 range)... The problem in itself is that seducers are dumb enough to marry that demographic, makes sense?? they are retarded... including myself ( i married a 23 year old hot russian/hungarian) ask me how it went??

"what is high maintenance:

A "high maintenance woman" is a term often used to describe a woman who is perceived to have very demanding needs or standards, requiring a significant amount of attention, effort, and sometimes expensive things to keep her happy, often associated with a focus on appearance and lifestyle, which can be seen as burdensome by others, particularly in a relationship context. "


^ . Do any of us will buy expensive things to make a girl happy regardless of the scale???? well maybe bait and switch with A FEW girls... unless is sugar daddy game(,most guys here don't do that shit).. or the passboard bros...

Last time i check we bypass high maintenance with good sex and having the girl invested (mainly through sex, excitement (aka no being boring), emotional stimulation and non neediness)