should probably clarify. my work involves coaching people. so the incentive is also $$$.
Most people who come to me are already open to help, so it's not usual to find people resistant like OP...
but this guy did come to the forum for help.
Did he though?
These kind of bans are always debatable and the exact line is hard to find, but let's look at things for a second.
The main thing you need to have to be able to teach someone is a willingness to learn on their part. It's tempting to think you can confront a stubborn person on the internet and by saying the right words and everyone piling in to reinforce it, you can get them to change their minds. Since when has that actually happened on this forum, or anywhere? I can't remember a single case in all the time I've been here. What really happens is that it becomes an ego battle where they feel they must defend themselves by all means possible, it ends in a big meltdown, and they are forced out the door in much more dishonorable circumstances.
Even if they did change their minds, they probably would not be able to let go of their disdain for this place and what it did to them, and no one would ever know. It's very easy to wound people's egos, especially those who have a very artificial sense of their own identity.
For people like these, in my opinion, the only thing that has any chance of effecting a change from outside (that is, unless he just develops a slow realization himself) is personal coaching by a skilled teacher who knows how to avoid ego conflict. Unfortunately that is not possible on a public forum. And is it what we really want to do? Are we a charity of therapists?
All the psychoanalysts of old, such as Freud and Jung, knew that the worst possible thing you can do if you want to effect deep change in someone is to get into conflict with their ego. You have to find a way to become a mirror to the parts of them that you want them to see, without them feeling the intrusion of your presence. And not only that, the ego of the teacher (or analyst) is as much of an obstacle to getting a good result - the need to be right, or the need to feel one's own authority, can make everything disfunctional and ensnare the parts of the student that you want them to overcome.
On a public forum, that sort of relationship is not possible. We are not all skilled psychologists or therapists, nor can we be such a thing in this setting anyway. This place represents information on seduction and fellowship of seducers, and exactly like
@ulrich said, when the student is ready they will appear. The successes of this forum have all been enthusiastic, willing, ambitious guys who have put things into practice, taken feedback, and gotten results. We will have to content ourselves with this.
The other thing is that drama is a black hole for energy. Despite the fact that spats between individuals and the community never resolve into anything useful, they draw in the focus and energy of everyone, some because they want to help the hard cases, others because they want a part of the drama. If too much of this is allowed, all the energy that could otherwise go into creating useful information for willing students will end up being wasted in useless effort, brawling or tit-for-tatting. And people who come here ready to learn will see the mess and wonder what we are really about.
In this case, I think
@HighVoltage has a concept of women and male self development that is entirely artificial. Do you really want to sit there and dismantle all the hundreds of hours of videos of fast cars, parties, instagram muscle mommies, and rhetoric from gurus that he has doubtless consumed? Seems like a waste of time, focus, and energy to me, and destined to fail. Maybe he will succeed somehow in making that a reality for himself, but this isn't really the best place to help him do that.
Just like there are countless women in the world, there are also places on the internet to cater to all the kinds of people there are at all the stages of development. Let him go where he belongs right now. And that keeps this place focused on what it is really for - seduction.
