When she says "well I should go" when in your apartment. Escalate now or use words to persist to get her to stay?

[sinksink]

No one size fits all, just curious on your thoughts on the pros and cons of these options.

Ideally, you've escalated before she said this. But let's say you get to this point.

In a bar, the girls chase articles suggest you say something like "no, stay two more minutes" and persist.

But if she is in your bedroom, should you just escalate now without saying anything or should you just tell her to stay longer like the above? The thing is, she seems to be in a withdrawing kind of mood if she is saying "well, I should go" which may be a bad time to get compliance by escalating

 

[ChickenWing]

Great question. Hopefully some of the pros chime in!

 

[Mr.Rob]

Totally depends on the context of the situation and how she's saying it or what led up to her saying it.

I.e. is she saying it because her escalation window is closing because you have failed to escalate?
Or perhaps youve escalated too aggressively or said something to make her feel uncomfortable.
Or perhaps neither of the two and she's just saying it to test you and see if you'll get needy.

Each situation requires a different response.

However as a general rule you want to proactively avoid this by making sure a girl you pull home is A) comfortable B) enjoying herself C) actively upping sexual vibe and responding to your escalation.

 

[ulrich]

You insist but always in a confident, understanding and socially savvy way.

I had a woman once in my home, after the first date, where I was fingering her and just before she came, she jumped out of the bed, said she needed to use the bathroom and then she had to go.
I insisted very charmingly but she still left.

The thing is different women have different barriers. Some women you just have to get the first kiss and everything next is downhill... some other women will get almost naked with you and then they will stop complying... some other rare times they can get an orgasm and then start resisting.

The only thing you can do is being very insistent but in a non-needy way ie. “C’mon let’s do it, it’s fun”, “Tomorrow is uncertain”.

Sometimes girls will storm off of your home. It happens. Many women are not used to skilled seducers and freak out when they realize they have let themselves go that far. “Is this really me?”, “Shit, I gave all this power away”.
Also, they know instinctively that if they have sex with you, they will most likely fall in love... and they want to protect themselves.

This is something that is going to happen occasionally depending on the kind of girls you pull off. With sexually open, raunchy party girls it will be uncommon... with conservative good girls, it will happen more often.

And always remember, if she decides to leave and you can’t convince her to stay, it doesn’t matter the outcome, always smile and frame it like you got what you wanted.
“Did he just wanted to show me his place and have a private chat? Maybe... he’s not angry... he seems actually enjoying himself”
“Maybe he is mad I didn’t stay to make him cum... but he is looking so chill... did he just wanted to make ME cum?”

 

[naturalmikey]

i’m like “yeah i think you should go.” she’ll likely be like “really?” “well yeah if you wanna go you should.”

it makes no sense, i realize that. you’ll probably never try it but it works way better than beggin.

 

[ulrich]

i’m like “yeah i think you should go.” she’ll likely be like “really?” “well yeah if you wanna go you should.”

it makes no sense, i realize that. you’ll probably never try it but it works way better than beggin.

To make that one work, delivery is key.
Maybe you should expand a little on the frame and/or the mentality. Otherwise our guy here might get confused.

 

[naturalmikey]

To make that one work, delivery is key.
Maybe you should expand a little on the frame and/or the mentality. Otherwise our guy here might get confused.

fair point. it can’t be said in a reactive/butt hurt way. more like, “that’s okay if you want to go i don’t want to keep you hear.” then if she is gonna go let her. but just before she’s about to leave, like at the door, be like “i would like for you to stay but it up to you.” you really can’t control her.

 

[Skills]

No one size fits all, just curious on your thoughts on the pros and cons of these options.

Ideally, you've escalated before she said this. But let's say you get to this point.

In a bar, the girls chase articles suggest you say something like "no, stay two more minutes" and persist.

But if she is in your bedroom, should you just escalate now without saying anything or should you just tell her to stay longer like the above? The thing is, she seems to be in a withdrawing kind of mood if she is saying "well, I should go" which may be a bad time to get compliance by escalating

This is the wrong question, you should never get to this point were she is saying i should go... if it gets to this point she is not sold on having sex with you and is anxious and nervous... You need to find out either by cold reading (what is going on) or by direct asking her what is the issue, or guesstimate the issue an then address it... gimmicky responses is silly and won't work... A change of strategy so you do not get to this point is the solution...

 

[sinksink]

This is the wrong question, you should never get to this point were she is saying i should go... if it gets to this point she is not sold on having sex with you and is anxious and nervous... You need to find out either by cold reading (what is going on) or by direct asking her what is the issue, or guesstimate the issue an then address it... gimmicky responses is silly and won't work... A change of strategy so you do not get to this point is the solution...

1. Cold reading in this case is saying something like "you think you should go because it is late, right?"
I jest, but actually what would be an example in this scenario of cold reading her?

2. I've never heard someone say "I should go"
However, Commander Sheperd in the Mass Effect series says this often and I guess that is where the idea behind this post comes from

3. Safe to assume if she says "i should go" then it is way too late to do anything and might as well "yeah, you should go" ?

 

[sinksink]

i’m like “yeah i think you should go.” she’ll likely be like “really?” “well yeah if you wanna go you should.”

it makes no sense, i realize that. you’ll probably never try it but it works way better than beggin.

! This is actually really funny. I think pappy on girls chase also recommends this.

So sometimes she actually doesn't just go and stays to figure out why you said that?

What would you say if she said "wait, wait but do you want me to leave?"

 

[Skills]

1. Cold reading in this case is saying something like "you think you should go because it is late, right?"
I jest, but actually what would be an example in this scenario of cold reading her?

2. I've never heard someone say "I should go"
However, Commander Sheperd in the Mass Effect series says this often and I guess that is where the idea behind this post comes from

3. Safe to assume if she says "i should go" then it is way too late to do anything and might as well "yeah, you should go" ?

forget the cold reading since it takes women intuition that comes with experience... For example one girl was in my house moving around nervously, i told her, relax nothing is going to happen, why are you moving around so much (i knew she was nervous cause she knew she would get fucked, and i knew her ex bf)....

 

[ulrich]

! This is actually really funny. I think pappy on girls chase also recommends this.

So sometimes she actually doesn't just go and stays to figure out why you said that?

What would you say if she said "wait, wait but do you want me to leave?"

It really depends on what kind of girl you are dealing with and what you want from her.

If you go for conservative girls, this could happen often and if you tell her “yes, you should go”, she is going to leave and not wonder too much why you allowed her to do that.

You need to keep in mind the kind of game you are running here.
Many guys pick up girls from nightclubs, they are not looking for relationships and want to rack up their numbers. Any girl that is not down to fuck is a waste of time. Hence the “yeah, you should leave”... it serves as a screening device more than as a way to save the situation.

Is that what you want?