Where to first kiss: Public or Private

[MickDavies]

I know the official GC line on this: within the first 10 minutes of getting her back to your place. It seems like a common scenario though is that beginners get to the point with a girl where the mood is just right for a kiss when out in public (especially in more traditional date locations). If they hold out & try to get to their place first, the moment is lost & they are unable to recreate it (the attraction window has closed).

I had a case of this a couple of weeks ago. I was messaging a girl I met online, I was just about to invite her out when she messaged me saying that it was way out of her comfort zone to ask but would I like to go for a coffee with her. I agreed & she came to meet me in a little cafe next to my house. We talked for a while & then I suggested we go for a little walk in the park, we walked & talked together for a while, then headed into the next park. By this point we had been 2 hours together & it seemed she was having a really great time. Then she looked down at her watch & said that she felt really bad but she hadn't expected to be out for so long & she'd promised to meet a friend who was going through a bad time & she had promised to help.

Perhaps I could have challenged her at that point & invited her back to my place (by then a 10 minute walk). Instead, I walked her to the station. She stood there for a while, talking & seemed highly excited, I assume in anticipation for the kiss, but we had already talked about meeting up again at which point. I thought that I might be able to get her back to my place & carry out the seduction from there, so I held off. Two days later she messaged me & said 'Hi, it was good meeting you. Sorry for the delay. I thought we really got on probably more as friends. I enjoyed our afternoon & thought we really got on'.

So I'm curious, both how I could have handled this situation better but also more generally how to handle the situation where she wants the kiss before you are logistically able to seduce her, while avoiding the window closing. Is it better in those situations to just go for it anyway, in public?

 

[Fuck This]

Punctuate the date with a kiss at an emotional high point. Generally at a moment of "alone at last".
Let me give you an example of some particularly effective kisses...

• Long distance online meetup after 4 weeks of phone and text. Passionate kiss upon meeting. Back to my hotel and in bed as soon as we are through the door.
  After 2 beers with kino on a patio while talking with a third wheel. We get up to leave and the third wheel goes to the bathroom. Kiss in the lobby of the bar before she comes back.
  In the elevator after flirty conversations and kino at the bar downstairs on the way to her room.
  After a hard climb up a mountain, standing at the summit still breathing hard.
  After a dinner where she was shit testing me endlessly. Walked her out to the car in the parking lot and laid one on her and she pounced on me there in the parking lot.
  10 seconds after she walked in the door to a party. Got her name after we broke embrace, and left 5 minutes later.
  After she invites you into her room...

Kisses that didn't go anywhere:

• In a loud club, at the bar 20 minutes before closing time. friends swooped her up and she was gone....
  After an info date, in the parking lot where she said she would love to take me home but couldn't, but "would I kiss her?"
  On the dance floor early in the evening before she was ready to go...Some other drunk guy decided to give it a go too with her later. I still took her home, but she would have gone home with any live dick at that point...
  Girl with 2 friends. Buddy and I isolated 2 of the 3 but the 4th wheel felt abandoned and cockblocked the rest.
  At the conclusion of any date on the front step of her home she shares with other people.

 

[MickDavies]

You climbed a mountain alone with a girl on a first date? That's some story.

 

[Fuck This]

You climbed a mountain alone with a girl on a first date? That's some story.

More than one.....

 

[MickDavies]

Cool. I have quite a famous, steep hill which I like to make use of but England doesn't run to too many mountains

 

[journeyman]

Punctuate the date with a kiss at an emotional high point. Generally at a moment of "alone at last".
Let me give you an example of some particularly effective kisses...

• Long distance online meetup after 4 weeks of phone and text. Passionate kiss upon meeting. Back to my hotel and in bed as soon as we are through the door.
  After 2 beers with kino on a patio while talking with a third wheel. We get up to leave and the third wheel goes to the bathroom. Kiss in the lobby of the bar before she comes back.
  In the elevator after flirty conversations and kino at the bar downstairs on the way to her room.
  After a hard climb up a mountain, standing at the summit still breathing hard.
  After a dinner where she was shit testing me endlessly. Walked her out to the car in the parking lot and laid one on her and she pounced on me there in the parking lot.
  10 seconds after she walked in the door to a party. Got her name after we broke embrace, and left 5 minutes later.
  After she invites you into her room...

This!!!

In my most recent experience, using a brief kiss in public can be a great tool to solidify the interaction, or to set the right vibe if for example you have been talking too platonically. Always on a high emotional point though!

Also, not kissing at all has worked well for me as it can make girls wonder whether you like them and keep them on their toes. This makes the pull easy as they wonder whether you are going to make a move later, and are relieved and happy when you escalate in your place.

The no-no for me is a full makeout in public. Then she gets slutty feelings and when you try to pull gonna create trouble.

Experiment with all and see what works for you!