Alright Jolly Roger,
I have some ideas from what little you wrote above, but for Night Game in which you said there was an attractive girl by herself and you got the feeling she gets approached all the time and it's pretty ordinary....
(And I am a Day Game guy, but getting good at Day Game actually makes Night Game a lot easier! - I'll have an example at the end...)
First (and anyone on the group feel free to jump in and correct me)... First, if she's attractive and alone at a bar drinking, and she's not an alcoholic, according an article I read that Alek Rolstad wrote, that means she is horney and looking to hook up. Quite possible you warmed her up. Made her feel noticed, and then whoever guy swung in and probably scored her later.
I don't know for sure, but that's what I am hearing here.
Second, you got the feeling she gets approached a lot and it's quite ordinary. It sounds to me you probably gave her what a coach I began with calls "the thirty minute conversation to nowhere" or the "interview conversation." At which at the end you get the "nice ta meet ya," from her. And as he jokes in his coaching video, at a certain point you hear "Nice ta meet ya..." So many times you want to punch the wall, and that's when you START TAKING A CHANCE with the Girl and begin talking to her MAN to WOMAN...
That's when you start to TEASE, PUSH PULL, FILRT, and begin doing sex frames, misinterprets, or what they call chase frames. Something like if she says "Ohh, I had such a long-hard week, I'm exhausted" you jump back with "Whoooah. Hey. We just met here and are complete strangers... (Devious grin, deep eye contact, then normal) But I get what you're saying about a tough week at work." Something like that.
It all starts on how you opened her. Depending on how busy or crowded it was. Or noisy. If she can hear you. Do what Alek writes, approaches next to her, but not obvious, Pre-Open - "Wow, it's a bit slow here tonight." Or "It's pretty crazy here tonight..."
Have her acknowledge. "I came here to check out Band XYZ, but I haven't been to this place alot." Or say the opposite depending on whatever... Have her respond. Then check for "logistics" - "Just curious... (Pause) Where's you're group?"
See if she's really alone, or not, or BF is coming. Assuming she is alone and says "No, just came here to see XYZ Band..." Then you can begin to tease, Push-Pull, "Well, maybe we ould get alongm cuz you like XYZ Band, but I gotta say you seriously don't look like an XYZ Band fan. You look too nice. Or too much like trouble. Or whatever. The model the coach above uses is called "Question, Answer, Tease." And it really doesn't matter what you tease, as long as it's not an insult.
You can tease about fashion. her taste in things. BUT NOT anything Physical that she can't change...
Do this and then you have to MOVE HER. Isolate her. "Hey it's getting crowded her, let's go over here where there's some space...."
Someone on here told me a month ago "Open, Banter/Tease, Qualify and Win, then Deep Dive - Win, Escalate" Wash rinse, repeat, based on how she responds...
Finally. Like AspringStoic says - You gotta do at least 100 approaches. I'd recommend Day Game. But there are guys here who are experts at Night Game...
I wasn't even trying to Approach and I put in 3 today with 3 very different reactions.
First Girl I had to literally had to jog a block to catch up to her, and by the time I did, she took a hard right as I did the "Policeman Stop." She kept walking, faster this time... I said "Hey, 2 seconds, any chance you could stop, you looked so much like "Jen Logan" a girl I dated in High School, I had to come over and say hi... What's your name?" She replied "Oh, sorry I'm in a rush on my lunch break, my name is Kennedy." I asked her where she was going, and what her job was, all while dodging tourists and people in Little Tokyo like an action scene from Rush Hour and finally we got to the entrance of the coffee shop, with me out of breath and having heavy Approach Anxiety because I haven't approached in 2 weeks. I said, "Listen, I'm illegally parked and I literally have 2 seconds, but you reminded me that girl from high school, and I we're strangers, but I also know we'd never cross paths again, so I had to come say hi. Is there a way we could connect and have a real coffee when there's time?"
She stared at me this this heavy smile, and these open eyes, and oddly said "Well no, I can't just give my number out to a stranger but..." And kept staring at me with those open eyes, and smile.
***And this is where I Fucked Up. And I'm still kicking myself.
The Approach Anxiety got to me. Plus the out of breath (and I'm not out of shape), but also I got nervous about the illegally parked car. I said - "That's cool. It was nice meeting you..." And she was like "Yeah... Thanks so much for coming to say Hi!"
The second set was a Duo. Turned out to be Sisters. Both exotic as Hell, Columbian or Venezuelan. This time in East L.A.
Told the older sister, who was dressed down - "You and I could totally get along, but you're sister here, she's trouble!" My target the sister Wicked, Red Hair, mid-riff, etc... Older sister said "I'm the trouble, she's the good girl..." And they both laughed. We bantered. I said "Hey, let me get to know your 'good girl' sister. Maybe coffee?" The older sister said "You seem like you'd be cool to date my sister, but she has a boyfriend." I was like, "Ah, that's cool." Looked at my target, deviously "I don't want to make your boyfriend jealous. Or get you in trouble..." Then I went back to the sister and gave what I call the "consolation prize." Basically had her look me up on google to see my creative stuff. I don't do IG, but you can add them to your IG as a "consolation prize." It seems to be a calibrated way out of a no go - she has a BF.
Seemed sincere. Both sisters were cool.
And AGAIN they were enthusiastic I approached.
Why am I writing this?
To get you to get out there and start approaching more than 2 experiences... And have experiences like these.
(And I'm learning as I write it out.)
Last note. The first girl. If it were Night Game, I probably could have gotten her A LOT easier. I think she was stunned about the Day Game approach that's not in the Frame, like she would be if it were Happy Hour, and she was at a Bar where an approach like mine could've landed easier. Maybe not because of the racing to get her.
Should have used the Coaches line for running sets like this - "Man, I got all my cardio in to just come say hi to you..."
However, I brain-farted on how to play it, because given her behavior, it seems like she didn't want me to leave, or wasn't trying to shake me off...
There you go!
Inviting Advice for how Jolly Roger should get out there and do better than I did above...