Journey of Guys who shifted from online dating to cold approach

[empath]

I am posting this thread to get motivated to make a shift from online to cold approach

So I have laid quite a girls from online
in last 2 months so its been

1 kind of boring, its very time consuming and emotionally drainIng
- I am kind of impatient and these girls can take forever to reply

2 Quality issues - you are a taker on the app + catfishing

3I feel you cant find relationship material girls there, at least articles by @Chase indicates that

I feel after setting up a date through cold approach the rest of the process should be same as online.

FYI my first lay was from cold approach so I have full trust on it but rest were online so I kind of rusty now

What I want to know is

How your journey turned out

What changes you had to make in your game

How much approach / time it took for your first lay

What venues did you targeted

Day game or night game

How did you made time just for appraching

Your reasons for approaching or shift from online

My biggest mental block is cold approach takes time and energy. Like specifically going out to pick girls feels weird and too much energy consuming from return

Why I want to do it is, cold approach skillset is superior to online in a way I know I can consistently get high quality girls and wont give heartbreaks soon like I am having right now and resolve quality issue for me.

I got very quickly attached to 2 girls in sucession and was not able to lock them after laying. (I know a separate issue from cold approach) But if I knew I could pick different girl I would have not chased them and kept feeling eternal pain.

 

[empath]

I think one would be social frame.

Few years back meeting guys of dating app used to feel like sort of uncool. Yoh cant get guys easily.

I think these days its more socially acceptable for guys and girls.

Nd then its not exactaly cold approach, you build a little bit of connection and banter before the date.

First thing in cold approach I guess would be taking care of social frame.

So she ease into interaction.

 

[isildur1]

you said yourself that you wanted to find a wife? Cold approach is a great tool for broadening your options and finding new women from around the world. And finding a wife is tough - its one of the decisions that will define not only your life but your children's also.

For me i gained a lot of benefits - it improved my social confidence, better sales skills, social skills, gained me more respect from women and it also gave me my girlfriend today.

Of course it is mentally intensive but what form of game isnt? it continues additional benefits that other forms of game do not for example you can form new friendships with wingmen , date women who don't use online dating , be independent and free off apps and pick what you yourself want.

Why I believe daygame will always be the best form of dating for the majority of men to meet new women :

Disclaimer: I am not a dating coach nor am I selling any dating products or services this blog is really for recreational usage to reflect on my previous experiences in daygame and to share my insi…

mindful-masculinity.org

 

[Stark]

I've always enjoyed being outdoors. I love movement - walking around. Doing stuff. I see tons of girls daily when I'm on the move.
Hot ones. Women that I want to bring into my sex life. A lot of them I picture naked. Wonder what would it be like to cup those tits/ass

You can see how this translates naturally into an affinity for daytime cold approach.

If you stay indoors 95% of your daily life, forget cold approaching. It won't work. You'll see it as a big investment and rightfully so.

My friends who own a car, and use it for all their commutes, without ever setting out for a walk, find cold approach hard as hell. Not to mention how out of shape they remain.

--

I easily find anywhere from 20 minutes to an hour daily for cold approach without intentionally setting out to do so.

When I first dipped my toes in daygame over a decade ago, I was running 'neo-direct'.

Towards the end of last summer, I switched to the daygame method Chase teaches on this forum that's far superior in terms of results.

My biggest mental block is cold approach takes time and energy. Like specifically going out to pick girls feels weird and too much energy consuming from return

This cracks me up everytime. Just put a time tracker on the amount of time you would spend on dating apps and subsequent back and forth per week. Money spent on app subscriptions. Not to mention the emotional impact from women on a screen suddenly disappearing after you had 'built a solid emotional connection'.


To be fair, running neo-direct is draining with very poor returns as you said. I use the approach mentioned in this thread and it yeilds high returns.

 

[isildur1]

I've always enjoyed being outdoors. I love movement - walking around. Doing stuff. I see tons of girls daily when I'm on the move.
Hot ones. Women that I want to bring into my sex life. A lot of them I picture naked. Wonder what would it be like to cup those tits/ass

You can see how this translates naturally into an affinity for daytime cold approach.

If you stay indoors 95% of your daily life, forget cold approaching. It won't work. You'll see it as a big investment and rightfully so.

I easily find anywhere from 20 minutes to an hour daily for cold approach without intentionally setting out to do so.

More than a decade ago when I first dipped my toes in daygame, I was running 'neo-direct'.





This cracks me up everytime. Just put a time tracker on the amount of time you would spend on dating apps and subsequent back and forth per week. Not to mention the emotional impact from women on a screen suddenly disappearing after you had 'built a solid emotional connection'.


To be fair, running neo-direct is draining with very poor returns as you said. I use the approach mentioned in this thread and it yeilds high returns.

exactly- doing online game you have the mental drain of swiping and looking at your screen constantly, daygame you are moving and actually making real life connections with real people .

I found a lot of men heavily invested in online game were too egotistical to do the jump to daygame- in the end they just stayed the way they were and never made the positive change to doing more daygame and were stuck at the mercy of algorithms/ apps - the convenience of online killed their lust to work hard and build real life connections with strangers.

Of course it's not for everyone and OP is already doing well in his love life- daygame has a high drop out and failure rate and understandably sometimes its too much

 

[empath]

exactly- doing online game you have the mental drain of swiping and looking at your screen constantly, daygame you are moving and actually making real life connections with real people .

I found a lot of men heavily invested in online game were too egotistical to do the jump to daygame- in the end they just stayed the way they were and never made the positive change to doing more daygame and were stuck at the mercy of algorithms/ apps - the convenience of online killed their lust to work hard and build real life connections with strangers.

Of course it's not for everyone and OP is already doing well in his love life- daygame has a high drop out and failure rate and understandably sometimes its too much

Tbh I find day game/night game superior then online.

My first lay and gf came out of it.

It showed me I can be very attractive to women.

The thing is the place I am living ironically dont have enough volume esp. on weekdays.

So travelling and not getting enough sets to apporach seems like a wasted effort.

I approach if I see someone beautiful or someone in a close proximity (mostly without second thought excet sometime when I have AA)

But to build the proper skills I need to have enough volume.

Mostly girls are out in group. They are talking to their friends and at my skill I need lone wolves first to build some positive experience and become smoother then I want to move to groups.

 

[isildur1]

Tbh I find day game/night game superior then online.

My first lay and gf came out of it.

It showed me I can be very attractive to women.

The thing is the place I am living ironically dont have enough volume esp. on weekdays.

So travelling and not getting enough sets to apporach seems like a wasted effort.

I approach if I see someone beautiful or someone in a close proximity (mostly without second thought excet sometime when I have AA)

But to build the proper skills I need to have enough volume.

Mostly girls are out in group. They are talking to their friends and at my skill I need lone wolves first to build some positive experience and become smoother then I want to move to groups.

yeah i daygamed in low volume city called Cambridge in the UK with a wing back in 2021 and it was pretty frustrating as the first two women i caught Igs of actually were friends and new each other i did it for only 2 days there but i can imagine if i'd done it for a week or longer i'd have gotten noticed.

definitely feel like a major city makes things a lot easier- somewhere like London, Shanghai , Seoul , Tokyo has fresh people on a weekly basis and provides a lot of opportunity - i spent about 90 percent of my daygame career in london so maybe im speaking from a more fortunate place in comparison to those who live in low volume towns

 

[empath]

yeah i daygamed in low volume city called Cambridge in the UK with a wing back in 2021 and it was pretty frustrating as the first two women i caught Igs of actually were friends and new each other i did it for only 2 days there but i can imagine if i'd done it for a week or longer i'd have gotten noticed.

definitely feel like a major city makes things a lot easier- somewhere like London, Shanghai , Seoul , Tokyo has fresh people on a weekly basis and provides a lot of opportunity - i spent about 90 percent of my daygame career in london so maybe im speaking from a more fortunate place in comparison to those who live in low volume towns

So this is Mumbai.

I will write the problem in precise.

See I work office - 8 a.m to 5p.m. (good days, lets say 2-3 in a week)

Now i can reach home get freshen up and leave around 6:30.

Now from this place anywhere good I need to reach will take me an hour so its 7:30.

Now while walking on those street I wont find as many girl.

Because those who had to leave college left around 2-3 p.m. now either they are at their home or with their friends.

Now here most people dont go for shopping themselve, they are using app which deliver stuff in 10 mins.

Or are too tired from work etc. or need to head to work next day etx.

Same for girls going back from office. Around 7 pm they are in rush locals are filled with people.

Why they are in rush because they live around 2-3 hours from office.

Nd here its a norm to work at least 9-10 hours a day in office.

So you see tough to catch a girl.

Mostly on fridays and weekends you can get them.

Pubs here are not filled on weekdays.

If you go on any weekends they deny entry to stag (single male) or charge crazy cover.

So most people are in groups you see.

Mostly u can catch girls only on beaches etc. (again not great volume and very far from where I live)



See the problem.

The city has a huge population.

The kind of girls I like live in gated socities travel by cars etc.

U mostly just dont catch them walking on street.

Its different from west where everyone is living on their own.

Nor here full campus town sort of things is there.

But if I get a solution to get volume of girls to approach I will be gald.

I want to do it consistently, to build a skill.