Tinder Tips and Tricks

[Bboy100]

I was listening to Tucker Max's podcast on Tinder (The podcast sucks. The only reason I listen to it is cause its kind of entertaining. lol) Basically, his theory was that you really didn't have to do anything on Tinder. You could just ask her out for coffee and you're good. The reason being that just her swiping right meant that she's already interested in you. So his idea for an opener which was supposedly "field tested" was this:

You: Coffee or Ice Cream? <---This can be any two low-commitment, public places. So, it could be bubble tea, brunch, sushi etc. Basically any of the type of dates GC teaches.
Her: [She answers]
You: Cool, let's meet up at x place for [Whatever her answer to the question was]

So it would look like this:

You: Coffee or Ice cream?
her: Ice cream!
You: Ok, cool lets meet up at Baskin robbins next to Fred Mayer at 5:00?

In practice, this didn't work very well. Usually, once I actually propose meeting up, she either stopped replying, gives a non-commital answer like "maybe" or avoids the question entirely. However, I did notice that the opener itself worked very well. The opener "Ice Cream or Coffee? " had a very high return rate (about 75% of the girls replied). My issue is that I don't really know how to turn this into a convo that goes anywhere. Any ideas?

 

[bbartman33]

I think it has to do with the fact that you didn't attempt to built some connection with those girls. In addition to that, you have to deal with her personal experience on Tinder, where backward rationalization is most likely making it harder for you. Girls have to deal with so much bullshit on Tinder, plus, they may have come across most tinder tactics (blame the internet, everyone have access to similar sources). I've realized that around 4 replies within the space of an 1 hr 30 min to 2 hr (where 1 message from me and one from her counts as one reply), try to set up logistics.

 

[Bboy100]

Yeah, ofc. I kinda figured that too. I would have been very surprised if this strategy as a whole actually worked. I'm more interested in figuring out how I could use just the opener effectively. Mainly because it has a higher response rate than almost everything else I've tried so far.

 

[Big Daddy]

I like Tucker's idea, but I wouldn't suggest going for "this place, this time. Yes or no?"

I'd do something that radeng said to me some time ago:

Me: Coffee or ice cream?
Her: Coffee!
Me: Oh you're a coffee girl and I'm a ice cream guy, our love isn't strong enough we can't be together/can't marry
Her: Laughs

Of course you'd say that to whatever she says. Then after a little bit of back-and-fourth I'd say something like

Me: Well, I'll give you a chance to convince me that coffee is better. When you're free this week?

I haven't been on Tinder lately, but opening was never an issue for me. Matching with hot girls (due to my pics -- yup, didn't solve this yet) and fucking them after the date is. I'd say I get the number from 90% of girls I talk to, and I go on dates with maybe 30-50% of them considering the flakes.

 

[bbartman33]

Lol, that's the opposite of me. I tend to only go on dates with 10-20% of my matches, I tend to lay on the first night. Then again, that's because my profile is pretty direct and tend to ask to meet up nearly immediately within matches. With that said, I want to try out what you lads are doing. Btw, what profile messages work? I have experimented with a few, but I forgot to save them.

 

[Big Daddy]

I don't seem to be consistent with my profile messaging testing. I just mention my height (6 ft) and some other shit like that. I quit the banter/playful thing as I thought it didn't set the tone right.

Actually, I'd be more interesting in how you do this. Invite straight to your place? Coffee date?

 

[Bboy100]

Btw, what profile messages work?

Include anything you're affiliated with (i.e. your job, your school etc.). If you're tall, include your height. Also write anything which might make you unique/stand out from other guys immediately. For me, that's the fact that I'm Bulgarian. Other than that, anything that's witty or funny works well. Interesting ones do ok too.

Currently, I swap off between two:

1. WWU student. [Book emoji] Bulgarian. [Globe emoji] Looking for someone with strong emoji game [Tongue out and winking emoji]
2. WWU student. [Book emoji] Bulgarian. [Globe emoji]
Two truths and a lie: I've been on a gameshow. I share a birthday with a celebrity who I personally know. I've known how to break dance since I was in 4th grade. Good Luck!

 

[Bboy100]

Btw, what profile messages work?

Include anything you're affiliated with (i.e. your job, your school etc.). If you're tall, include your height. Also write anything which might make you unique/stand out from other guys immediately. For me, that's the fact that I'm Bulgarian. Other than that, anything that's witty or funny works well. Interesting ones do ok too.

Currently, I swap off between two:

1. WWU student. [Book emoji] Bulgarian. [Globe emoji] Looking for someone with strong emoji game [Tongue out and winking emoji]
2. WWU student. [Book emoji] Bulgarian. [Globe emoji]
Two truths and a lie: I've been on a gameshow. I share a birthday with a celebrity who I personally know. I've known how to break dance since I was in 4th grade. Good Luck!

 

[Verisimilitude]

Hey guys, I downloaded tinder about a month ago, and I have a couple things I've noticed and a question.

So the way I see tinder (or really any time you pick a girl up in general) is a set of hurdles/levels to pass.

Level 1 is opening. I usually use something like hey x pretty smile and it works really well. I might add something from their pics if I find it interesting.

Level 2 is conversation. I usually am able to start a good convo, but I've been struggling recently, especially in the first 2 or 3 messages.

Level 3 is phone #. I haven't had a serious problem with this yet.

Level 4 is dates, and those usually are easy once you get a girls #.

From then on, it is just regular game.

So does anyone have any advice on how to start a good conversation to keep her interested? I hate losing matches in the first 2 or 3 messages.

I've found keeping it short works best, but I still feel like too much of a nice guy when I start out.

I also have trouble moving from platonic to flirting (but maybe I should save that for dates)

What do you guys think?

 

[Fuck This]

Best bet is find similarities. Show you can relate. Kids, animals, school, career
Next best is to pique her curiosity. "Remind me to tell you about my trip to ( someplace cool you have been) last summer", or "there is a funny story to go with that tiger picture"
If she hooks she will ask , "Oh really?" or "I'd love to hear about it", or "that's cool"
If she is just giving 1 or 2 word answers you don't want her anyway....
When she hooks, ask for the Phone #. This is a go/no go moment. No go , cut off conversation and move on.

Remember you can be selective in the Tinder world too. Just remember that she is doing the hard work for you if she doesn't respond. Saves you from a time waster...

 

[Skippy]

Here's whats worked well with girls that I match with in my college:

I'll open with "[name]! I like your aesthetic" (for some strange reason, this opener has worked the best for me)

If they respond, I'll just send a couple messages back and forth and then say "we should grab shakes sometime". Usually if they are responding to my previous messages they will be down to meet up. then we exchange numbers etc...

One question I had was, during the actual tinder date, the topic of tinder experiences sometimes comes up. The girls will ask "what are you on tinder for?" or "do you do this often?" How do you answer these? I just say "I do it occasionally--but not that often since I'm sometimes busy on weekends" (I want it to sound like I'm trying to reassure them that I don't do this with every single girl, even though I might be)



I probably need to get some dslr pics and some muscle shots. I don't actually look that good in my first pic, but I think it does well because the social proof and preselection is through the roof. I do okay in terms of getting matches, but my results are significantly better with girls in my college.

 

[Bboy100]

One question I had was, during the actual tinder date, the topic of tinder experiences sometimes comes up. The girls will ask "what are you on tinder for?" or "do you do this often?" How do you answer these? I just say "I do it occasionally--but not that often since I'm sometimes busy on weekends" (I want it to sound like I'm trying to reassure them that I don't do this with every single girl, even though I might be)

I get this a lot. Just give her a sly smile and playfully say something like "you know what they say...curiosity killed the cat"
Or you can just give her a playful shrug+a sly smile then say "I dunno...wbu?". If you don't like this approach, you can also just humerously misinterpret what she's asking you

Ex.
Her: So what are you on Tinder for?
Me: To find dates...duh!
Her: Haha, ok, but like, what are you looking for?
Me: Out of life? Well, I want a douchey job as a lawyer, a mansion and a trophy wife. Wbu?

It's important that you don't come off as actually trying to hide something. Rather, you're simply communicating that you either choose not to discuss it, or at the very least, you're going to make her work harder for an answer.

Check this article out: https://www.girlschase.com/content/using ... hasing-you <---its related to this topic

Also, if she asks "what are you on here for", that would be a great time to use a BF disqualifier.

 

[lux7]

Hey guys, any of you has noted their matches going down (or maybe up for you) without changing anything?

I'm pretty sure there must be something, I got Tinder pro and changed my location to a place where I know for certain I get a certain percentage of matches and I got nothing.

There are 3 reasons I'm thinking this might for:

1 too many swipes
I swiped too much, so now m profile has been queued for many women who haven't seen my pictures yet, and that means I"m at the bottom of the queue for new ones as well (I've been trying to swipe less lately, not yet sure it's the right strategy).

2. location changes
2. I changed location too often, the system got somewhat out of what whack (ie: it doesn't want to match people who are too far away, so it put me on the back burner).
I'm not convinced about this one though

3. Super likes for sales fucked up the game for non payers
You now can buy as many super likes as you want and many guys are buying loads of them and jumping ahead of the queue


What do you think?

 

[Eternity]

Had 3 matches these two weeks ive been using Tinder. One was a bot trying to scam me. Im thinking of getting professional photos to use, idk though what u guys recommend?

P.S I aint ugly, get checked out on the streets every now n then

 

[Bboy100]

Had 3 matches these two weeks ive been using Tinder. One was a bot trying to scam me. Im thinking of getting professional photos to use, idk though what u guys recommend?

Depends. Is Tinder something you seriously want to use as a way of meeting women? If so,then the answer is yes. If it's just something you're doing casually, then maybe the effort isn't worth it. Just don't expect to meet many women if you don't.

 

[Eternity]

Im a vain mofo so yeah... Still, I saw some of the profiles of men out there, fucking atrocious. I guess I want some of the fun y'all have...

 

[Verisimilitude]

I posted this on my LR but it feels like it'd help here too.

Here are my observations from 5 months of tinder:

I use the pretty ____ opener and add in something different (how's your weekend, how'd you like traveling to X?) to be a little unique. I get her talking about something, travel is my go to. We talk about the same stuff like food, tv, etc. for a bit, then I ask her out. This usually happens in a day , sometimes less. You should be able to feel when you should ask her out, just like you should feel when you should move a girl. 7 messages each is a good number, but I think I could usually ask her out even earlier than that. You just need enough time to show her you're a normal everyday person and not a serial killer.

The best tip I have is ask her out first before you get her number!

I have no idea why this works, but I kept getting no responses when I asked for a girls number, but I nearly never get rejected if I ask them out first. I went from getting rejected 85% of the time to getting a yes 85% of the time. Once you ask them out, then just throw in some b.s. about how you like to text better and then she'll be happy to give you her number. I even had girls give me their number as soon as I asked them out.

Keep things simple too. You don't have to do a show and dance, you know she's already attracted to you. Just be normal like you would at a bar or any other approach, and then ask her out when the time is right.

The downside to this is you have to meet with her quickly. I'm not funny or clever over tinder message (I don't want to be funny), and there's only so much you can say over message/text. So if you have to wait a month, then it might not happen. But I think that will be the case no matter what you do. I'm better at connecting in person anyways.

Something I haven't tried for long term tindering is after you grab her number, to say, "Hey Idk about you, but texting after a while gets boring, would you be cool with talking more when we can both meet up?" It's a risky play. But I don't really see any other way to keep things going.

So:
1. Have an opener, but add in some unique element about her if you can (or just how's your weekend/day going)
2. Get her talking about an interest, keep it simple
3. ASK HER OUT FIRST
4. Grab her number
5. Meet quickly

-V

 

[Bboy100]

I get a lot of requests from people to see what my profile looks like. Here it is: http://tinder.com/@exampleprofile

I interchange the last few pics a lot. The only ones I keep consistent are the main pic, the pic with the dog, and the shirtless pic. My results don't really change too much as long as I keep those in place.

 

[GeneralFap]

Bboy100 The link doesn't show your picture

 

[Bboy100]

Bboy100 The link doesn't show your picture

Not sure why that is. I'll email them and try to get it figured out