I think I am missing something big here, because I'm also trying to present similar things, but I don't feel it obviously leads to these results. I mean I am indeed changing career trajectories, want to explore myself, and I am not sure of what I'll be doing few years down the road, so I personify all these things extremely well.
But in general, I feel that even if I talk about things along these lines I don't get any obvious reaction that they see me as a lover and not a boyfriend. If I ask them about men, they still talk about how they like their relationships to be, and they mention attractive characteristics of guys mostly under the lens of going for a relationship. I feel I have to be extra obvious with all the exploring thing and liking new experiences in order for them to realise how this is going.
Could it be that I set the right frames but I don't see it? Because I get the feeling sometimes that ok she doesn't seem to get it, I have to start talking about how I like new sexual experiences, and how I love exciting fast sex. But then it feels like I am force feeding her all this stuff, which has the opposite result.
From your reports (and I've read most of them) it seems to me that you simply don't embody and express the person you want to be.
Remember, she's not responding to the
fact that you're changing course in life and exploring new things, she's responding to
how that makes you feel. Does it excite you? Does it make you feel free and happy? Does it fill up your senses with possibilities? You still have to express, in your emotions and body language, the other 95% of the frame that you set with your words. It's not something you can just make up on the spot. A person's real emotions effuse out of them like a vapor without regard for their intentions, and it either smells good or it smells bad.
It seems to me, from what you write, that you feel internally as if you are struggling and somewhat lost in life. Perhaps you also feel many other things, but what is coming through to her is your internal state of tension and frustration, which robs your emotions of power and affect when it's time to express yourself.
The way I see things - and maybe some other guys feel differently, maybe it goes against the idea that game is just some technical thing you learn and put out regardless of your internal state - but I don't think anyone can spend very long being someone they're not, at least not me.
For me, game is 50% seducing myself, and 50% seducing her. If I'm not enjoying myself already, if I'm not at peace with myself and who I am, or if I'm stuck in my head because the present moment is not pleasant enough for me to want to be there, I can't succeed. It doesn't work. All the worst experiences I've had in seduction, that horrible, cold feeling of grind, and the most unpleasant rejections, have been when I thought I would just ignore the fact that my mind is in the gutter, and act like everything is fine.
That doesn't mean you have to be on cloud nine all the time, but you have to be able to stay within a sort of garden inside your own mind, where you are able to live in the moment, project your attention and your expressions outward, and smell the roses. Because if we aren't offering looks, money, or status, we are offering to share with her the world that we experience. And it has to be a good one.
Another issue I have, which may be connected to the previous one is how to set all these frames without coming off as a loser that they want nothing to do with. I suspect having strong fundamentals helps, then they see you as an exciting sexy guy, and since, you have nothing else to offer you just have sex. Maybe I'm just not there yet and when I become sexier all these previous issues will disappear.
Yes, I strongly suggest to work on your fundamentals, I think you are being neglectful of it. That's one of the great things about Girls Chase, the emphasis on fundamentals and having a strong and powerful seductive base. If the base is not there, a few words won't help.
Sounds good. Guess I'll just have to test back and report. I hear a lot of people saying you have to do things like go out of your way to hide success, or otherwise you get instantly slotted into husband category. Your approach is elegant, and it feels like it would override those concerns, but I guess I'll just test and see.
I've always believed you should never try to work against your own identity. Every guy (and this goes back to the fundamental point that attraction is not a rare commodity) every guy has an archetype, an identity, that a lot of women desire. He's more close to that archetype than all the other archetypes, but he isn't able to present it in an exciting way, or with the right frames. To succeed, he needs to find out how to present the archetype, not simply how to present some universal generalized attractive identity.
The reason is that when you internally feel at one with your archetype, your expression is at its most powerful, you are happiest with yourself, you are congruent, and you are exceptionally attractive to girls who are particularly attracted to that archetype. The same way that game is not about creating attraction, neither is it about creating an archetype from scratch. It's about learning how to channel your archetype in a sexually evocative and stimulating way, learning how to tune down the boring parts and tune up the exciting parts, and how to make girls see a side of it that turns them on.
That's why some guys succeed being arty and moody and seducing her with his internal world, other guys succeed by being social and 'alpha', other guys succeed by being witty and giving her an enjoyable experience with him as a 'third party observer of life'.
That's what makes the difference, in my opinion, between seduction making you feel like a weird chameleon, and it making you feel like the more you do it, the closer you get to the person you always felt that you could become. Disqualifying is not about becoming something else entirely, it's about making that archetype attractive in a transitory context.
