Outing 31.01 [& 01.02]
Background
First time out since exams and foot healthy. It’s 6°C out, warmer than expected! Still have full winter gear on - hat, scarf, pullover, jacket and winter jacket.
And yet, I came across one girl who had a jacket on - open - revealing a crop top and plenty of midriff. I walk past, bug-eyed, feeling slightly cold even with all my thick layers on. How is this possible!
The goal of this outing was to get back into the habit of approaching - it has been like 3 months because of both injury and exams consecutively - so I wanted to get back into it. Doing the approach was more important that getting far along in it. Am following the little system
@Skippy and I created in NY where in line with prudent goal setting, we say an approach gives you one point, and going for the close (number) counts as three - whether you get it or not. The point is to incentivize pushing forwards as much as possible, without caring or feeling pressure for results. So for every outing I go out here, my goal has been 10 points. Worst case that means 10 approaches, best case one approach and three numbers.
Girl 1:
Cute brown coat and pants at main station. Walk after, when it becomes clear she’ll enter train I jog the last bit and compliment her style. Kinda eject after too, could’ve asked if she was single
Girl 2:
She's walking confidently, so area opener.
She stops says she’s she’s working, but do I need anything? But with smile and good vibe - mirroring me.
Finish opener and then let her go. Could’ve just continued as nothing was though!
Girl 3: HBBlondie
Super cute gorgeous blondie on other side of street. She crosses as I am at cross walk so I take out phone and stop for timing. Area opener.
She isn’t, I finish it, ask where she’s from (not far actually), ask if she works here then. She says oh, she studies, with a smile. A go, “oooh…” and am thinking if I want to directly cold read because I just asked a few questions already, albeit she is smiling and receptive.
Pause, she says, “But I’m meeting someone, and I’m already late,” since right behind us is a café. I let her go. STUPIID.
What I should’ve done is cold-read statement her like, “Hmm, well if you study… I feel like you’d be doing something… creative”. And then golden question. Which gives me basis to close already if she mentions being in a rush again.
But she was this beautiful girl walking confidently. Glad I approached!
Girl 4:
No two-punch but just one-punch compliment on her hair as we get close. Super sweet accented “thanks” but we don’t stop. Retarded xd
Girl 5:
Blondie coming out of building I was wondering about what it was for. She tells me but is not hooked.
Should’ve cold read her e.g., after what she was doing there then.
Girl 6:
By now am deeper in banking sector. Hot brunette walking towards me obviously vibing to the music on her headphones.
Area opener, she laughs and agrees, then show the Niki Minaj song she’s playing.
“Well it’s always interesting how… when you have a good vibe, good energy… you can feel how it somehow exudes into the world,” I say.
She agrees happily.
Then she goes, “well, I wish you a great day!” and somehow I find myself ejected.
Girl 7:
Am posted up, see this girl in red jacket and a really hot booty walk by nearby. I just look at her for a bit before I think to myself, screw it, I’ll just go ask if she’s single.
Walk/jog after her, she’s walking fast. At some point she stops at a traffic light just before I get to her, and I know traffic light approaches have strong jarring effect it turns green, so I wait and walk after.
Then actually do area opener, this time I focus on being more intent and sexual in my vibe since I was reflecting how my previous approach probably failed to hook due to too social of a vibe.
Then go into how interesting it is how knowing a surrounding can MAKE YOU FEEL comfortable.
Then get what she does (studies), I cold read it’s something creative (”I wish”). Go into if she would do it again. Do the golden question (Would work at a beach), I do a brief description of it. Then soon add false time constraint and close.
“Can I trust you with my number?” I ask. She mirrors the question. Then puts in her number, and says, “And do you trust I’ll put in my real number?” (Bad sign I feel). I am just nonchalant and say it’s up to her.
Then do a small reaffirmation with her of how spontaneous… but interesting this was.
She says, “Wow. First time I was approached where it was not creepy”:
Hahahahahhaha.
Girl 8:
Blondie walks past, I rush after and just shoot a are you single line. She says no, also not very enthusiastically. Overall uncharacteristically rushed and thus unrefined but something in me went, “Just do it!” And so I went and did it. Something I’ve been training specifically, action-taking uninhibited moments.
So this was my 10 points (1x per approach, 3x for a close)
Then went to gym and fitness, also to do exercises for my foot. After, decided to go down to center again for some more approaches
Girl 1: HBRedShoes
She’s waiting for tram in my direction. Red shoes. Open on it, compliment how it needs bravery to wear, and lead into cold read how she probably is the type of person that has neon colored shirts for sports. She hooks.
Then tram comes, I enter and chase frame her as “following me already” since luckily she is taking the same one. “Haha yes seems so,” she says. We find seats and then I golden question her, SOT music since she started playing eGuitar and dances (which I find super sexy), find out early where she gets off. She says her buddy joins at x station, so I say I am getting off there. Close when we almost get there, somehow one of us accidentally calls her apparently because once I’m outside walking, after a minute I see her number calling me… and I didn’t have time to give her my number…
Me, wondering how in the seven heavens she got my number: “???”
But super good sign she even called me! Overall very receptive. Beautiful brunette with very curly hair.
Girl 2: HBStairs
Me walking down, her walking up. The path has both stairs and smooth incline.
“Hey, I have a VERY important question for you,” I ask. She stops and takes out her headphones.
“Because we had a discussion recently amongst friends. Which one is easier to go up… left or right?” [Big long stairs or the smooth incline]
She laughs and we agree both are bad! And she is out of breath so I mini cold-read on it, turns out she came here by bike too, so I say, “don’t tell me you’re here to do sports too”. She is. Gym, for the gains (in my eyes she was already fit and perfect though). Cold read whether she does teamsports (opposite), how she gets focused and aggressive in sports (I know her type, ex-gymnast. But she disagrees, interestingly enough).
She mentions her friend is waiting, I golden question her a bit, she says she has no time (studies medicine and works on the side), soon initiate closing sequence.
“But just as friends,” she says, “I just came out of a relationship so I have no intentions.”
“Oh, no absolutely,” I say, “Anyways, expectations are BS, no matter what.” Could’ve done this better:
“Yes, well have to say it, otherwise people get expectations, then get disappointed,” she says as she types in her number.
I somehow like this frame, because it seems to easily lead into a no-expectations gambit.
Girl 3
Standing outside at supermarket. Walk past, then act like I got a call, wander back past her again without looking at her.
Then open once ‘call finished’, compliment style, she is actually super sweet. Taller than me, and takes her hand to wave goodbye when I eject. It's weird how I will go in with the thought of, "Ok whatever, let me do this approach, I'll just compliment/open and then eject". And then when she's receptive I'm in this autopilot. Should add the contingency for when she's receptive!! Hahhahaa.
Girl 4: HBFrench
Petite brunette with blue eyes. Open with who she looks like, except I say like heroine actress in 1900s spy movie. Express fascination, then ask what she’d do if she met her double!
I had to switch to English since she didn’t understand. From French speaking part.
Found out she’s here for working, does architecture. I do a setting-up qualifier where I say there are two types of people from where she comes from. Does she know this? And then frame one as super boring and lame, and the other as fun and adventurous. Which one is she? ”I don’t know,” she says. Oh man.
Well I close, she tells me she’s ‘not confident in these things’ but gives me her number. It’s close with the tram though so I actually enter and ride with her one stop since it suits me anyway. In these minutes I setup by saying how people who moved always find themselves missing something the most, perhaps unexpectedly, and ask what she misses the most from home. It’s a restaurant. But not missing much.
Which in hindsight was a missed opportunity to frame her as forwards-looking and open for new things. Oh well.
Last girl did not respond to texts but all other three did. Although HBRedShoes, by far the most receptive one, postponed the date twice already by the time I’m writing this a few days later. So we’ll see…
Outing 2: 01.02 & HBUk
Background
Go out at 2:30pm, feeling tired for some reason
Missed Opportunities
- Light blue jeans swaying ass girl: I was seated, she rushed past, waited too long
- Autumn colored girl, great fashion: Walks fast, I walk after but she turns into building
- Side cut girl RUSHING past me as I was going after fast-walking girl. Gorgeoouuuus but really speeding away!!
- Blondie bstr. PIVOT AND GO AFTER
- Blue eyed tram stop: Stop immediately, act fast!
Field Thoughts & Ideas
- 3pm good for leisure areas. Where I went was BS
- [PLACE] 4pm Wed is just Ghetto. Wack people, not even hot girls
- DO RAINBOW RUSE AFTER DFO
Girl 1:
Blue coat, knee high boots. Compliment on outfit, but said super weakly. She walks on but after 2 seconds I see her (from the corner of my eyes) snap out of autopilot and turn around abruptly to thank me - I had already chuckled and continued walking
Girl 2:
Lots of makeup, dressed up, not super my type but I think why the hell not, good practice for approach muscle.
Area opener, but she continues walking saying she doesn’t speak the language.
Girl 3:
Blondie with sexy body. Walk after, she enters this passage and I go too, then open to ask where bathrooms are with idea of going “omg you know who you look exactly like” after.
Well a way too young face looks back at me, nervously. Takes off her headphones. Quick eject! What a trap.
Girl 4:
Hot brunette walks past my bench I am now sitting at and thinking. It’s 3pm. I first think she’s not so cute but when she gets close and I open it turns our she is super beautiful…
Open with style compliment; ask if she’s from area (not really but nearby) and pace on how when someone is from somewhere and feeling comfortable and at ease… it shines through.
“Ooh, how cute,” she beams, then motions to continue walking. Dammit.
Should’ve just brute force rainbow ruses her, goddammit.
Girl 5:
Autumn coat, area opener, don’t RR and she moves on. Dammit
Girl 6: HBNIreland
-area approach
-Switch to EN
-RR nature
-What surprised her here
-Nr close weak
Girl 7: Confident HBAsian
Asian woman walking very confidently. Am back in banking/rich area so I can already feel where she’s coming from.
Bitch face on, I think to myself, alright… out of principle I’m doing this.
Area opener, she laughs, says, “Because I’m not SWISS?”
She’s indeed speaking in that haughty bossy tone of someone who has been in authority. I like the challenge in general.
Well asking where she’s from (she only spoke English) is not the winning move here because she thinks about it and says it’s complicated, but technically American.
But the thing with this is that while it’s the easiest transition in the world… it also has a degree of finality to it.
DO RR AFTERRR
Girl 8
Lakeside approach. She took my pic, I went through entire process including RPO lake. Didn’t close since was not as cute as hoped from front.
HBUk
Lastly, just wanted to mention how I love how social circle inspires you to up your game. There is this one girl I do sports with that literally has a personality and body straight out of my vision board. (Face is ok). If I weren't cold approaching I would for sure get oneitis for her. Literally models globally, is here because of the war.
And now, I have this feeling that I
do not believe that in one month of diligent cold approach, I cannot meet a girl just like her.
And this... is very freeing.
On a sidenote, I realized I really love athletic girls. Not buff gym bunnies but the type of girl that loves to go to cardio and do body-weight workouts - makes them nicely toned and lithe - and gets me very aroused. So every time I to the gym or sports, I will likely see one girl I really like the body of.
And while I do not do approaches there (why would I)... I realized I can just camp in the area of the university sports halls (which are all right by campus) and catch them coming or going to sports! In fact HBStairs is exactly this. Hot body, on her way to do sports. Perfect!
On another note; I noticed that going out at 2:30pm, while nice that I put in the effort, is not so fruitful for the areas I went to. Makes much more sense to go out later, or to go to different spots. 3pm is a good time for leisure spots, but the issue right now is that it is freezing and windy outside, which makes no one go to leisure spots outside now... so might think about either going later or going to the main station where there really should be enough people. Means I'll have to open with the ex-gf DFO more often and really be precise and fast, because people have actual trains to catch.
And planning for the next semester, I actually prefer approaching under the week in the late afternoon/evening after academic obligations and before my sports, rather than approach on the weekend. Saturday and Sunday I don't remember being as such great days for approaching, but I may be just going about it wrongly. Hmm.
Outlook - Future Deliberate Practice
Overall, I fulfilled my goals of going out and getting the number of approaches (points) I wanted; 20 and 10 respectively. The main learning I made was that I remembered how vital a Rainbow Ruse is quickly after the opener, as shown by all the approaches were it seemed to go very well fast but then the girl just ejected. Which is actually unusual at first, but then you remember the difference between approaching students and working women - latter need more tech and calibration to hook. Or so it seems as of now. Is great, because it's not far off and just makes your game more solid overall. Which drives me a lot actually.
And perhaps I was a bit too remembering of my approaches in NY and Brussels, where as a tourist I have a really nice stack and super hook rates. Made me remember how culture might flow into it; my country is very well known for aloof people (coconut people - hard shell but warm soft inside) where expats have big difficulties making friends. Of my international friends, I am often their only local friend. And going to any other country it is much more normal to have small-talk with random people. Rather unusual here.
But then again. Personally I scoff a bit at any "my country is harder bro" victim-mentality whining thoughts, because humans are humans and girls are girls. There will always be a way to make it work! In fact, I get this thought when I hear people from other parts of the country complain about my city having the most aloof and bitchy women. Well... I get along with them just fine, and for me they are amazing, lovely, incredible creatures. So this reaffirms my belief. And I even like it much more if this is the case, because it means I can cut my teeth in tougher training grounds!
But this last paragraph was just kj, so never mind. Just keep my dedicated focus and goal, and take action to get there. Conceptually, easy as pie. Now just be the man and work for your own vision, goals, and life.
Onwards,
-Dev