E's Journal

[determined]

FR++: Apr 20th, 2019

Had my first good experience with night game. I'm definitely not a nighttime person, but I was visiting DC where I didn't know anyone, so went out this Saturday.

I walked into my first bar which I chose based on the Latin music and the fact that it seemed from the outside to have a decent number of women. Started watching the band and dancing on my own, very minimally, and noticed a girl hovering next to me. I figured she probably wants me to say hi, so I turned towards her, put my mouth near her ear (it was loud), and asked her name. She looked good. Danced with her until the end of the song. I think I impressed her with my skills. Not that I'm an amazing dancer or anything, but I think significantly better than the average guy who'll hit on you at a bar.

At the end of the song I asked her if there's anywhere we can sit at this bar, and she said upstairs. Perfect, away from her friends . We went up and sat on a couch. The upstairs was almost completely empty. Some talking and figuring out logistics: she was a student, it was her friend's birthday, and this girl was the sober driver. I was completely sober, too, btw, which nicely put us in a similar state of mind. I barely drink - like I said, not a nighttime person. Learned a bit more about her, and based on her behavior I figured she's pretty damn attracted, so I put her hand around my head, put mine around hers, and kissed her.

We continued intermingling talking and making out, with the physicality escalating. At one point she told me it's too bad she's her friends' driver and that I should find a girl who can give me what I want tonight. I said I'm happy with her. I point out her goosebumps and she says, "Well, whose fault is that?" We escalated until her hand was on my crotch and mine was on her inner thigh underneath her dress. Then I told her we're going to go to the bar's bathroom. I had also taken down her number at some point just in case.

Bathroom was taken so we wait, and this is where the mood died a bit. It just took too long for us to get in there, and in the meantime we were standing somewhere downstairs where everyone could see us, maybe even her friends. It was a small bar and not the type of place where anyone else was making out around us. So while I remained physical while we waited, I didn't feel I could be as physical as we were upstairs on that couch. I think I only kept one hand on her, probably mostly on her hip, with some kissing. We also stood there longer than necessary because I kept my energy so focused on her to keep the mood up that multiple times I noticed someone going into the bathroom and realized that, "Damn, the last person came out and I didn't notice." Altogether we probably waited 5 minutes.

Once we got in the bathroom we started to make out again. I told her to take my shirt off. She did, then said she would not sleep with me in that bathroom. She's never done that before and she just met me. I said it's totally fine and we'll go only as far as she wants. I could see she was still uncomfortable, so I stopped and asked if she's alright. I told her, "Listen, it's totally fine if we don't have sex. You could say right now that you wanted to leave this bathroom and it'd be completely ok. I'm glad I met you and not everything is about sex. I don't want or need anything from you." Then I added, "Well, maybe want, but not need. " That made her smile and she said it's more believable, and that she feels much better because she doesn't really know me and you can get into some scary situations.

So we continue. In a bathroom I can't go slow like I usually do to tease her and make her comfortable or to spend time overcoming resistance. I pull her dress down below her breasts. Her hand makes it to my crotch again, and I slide my hand up her thigh. I squat down and kiss my way up her thigh as I lift up her dress. Her pussy smells bad and I decide it's not worth tasting to turn her on. Instead I stick my face in there over her panties. I stand back up and slip my hand into her panties and onto her clit. She shudders, then says we should stop and that I should find another girl who can give me what I want. She gave some reasons that made no sense, among them that she should get back to her friends. I say that if her friends needed her, wouldn't they have texted? She says she left her phone with them. I feel that she really does want to stop, so I acquiesce. Still wanting another chance, I say, "How about this: You go back to your friends, and I'll wait around here for another 5 minutes. If you don't come back by then, I'll leave."

She didn't come back and I left the bar. I texted her that it was great to meet her, I'm bummed she didn't come back, and hope she enjoys her night (I felt my risk here was attainability so it was best to be as warm as possible). She replies that yeah, her friends wanted to leave so she is now driving them back, but she actually did come back to say goodbye to me. I asked if after she dropped them off would she be way too exhausted to come back out. Over an hour later she responds that it took over an hour to drop them all off and she doesn't want to drive back into the city.

Next day I tried again even though I knew the magic was gone. She said with her schedule she wouldn't be able to make it to the city on a school night, and I was leaving soon.

Next I went to another bar and opened 2 pairs of girls, each of which had one hot girl and a less attractive friend. Spent a good amount of time with each and had decent conversations with both pairs, but no sexual tension.

Analysis?

First off, I don't think I did anything all that exceptional. All I did was notice the fact that she was interested and move things forward quickly. That begs the question, How do I get more girls interested in me like that off the bat? Fundamentals of course, but what specifically? It's not like I can ask her what it was about me she liked, or ask all the other girls what it is that's missing.

I do think going for that bathroom quickly was my best bet. Since she was driving and I was staying at a hostel, logistics would have worked against me the longer I waited. I also do think I could have made more happen if I had escalated better. If I could do it over, I would have moved her hand from my crotch to inside my pants. I think holding my dick in her hand would have affected her. I would also have put more of the escalation burden on her by asking questions like, "That feels great, baby. You're amazing. What else can you do?"

Lastly, I would not have pulled her dress neither down nor up. I think those escalation points make girls think, "Wait, we just went a step further. Am I sure I want to go through with this?" I think I would want to go directly from base 1 to home run, meaning that she would pull out my dick while she was still completely dressed, and in a moment of passion I would in one continuous flow turn her around, bend her over a bit, pull her dress up, her panties to the side, and slide my dick in her.

Thoughts from guys who have successfully pulled girls into bathrooms?

 

[determined]

Overheard my grandparents, with whom I'm visiting Paris, talking today

Grandmother: E is meeting today at 4 a girl he met 2 days ago.
Grandfather: A girl he met here?
Grandmother: Yes. I don't know how he does it.

hehe

 

[determined]

LR: Friday, May 17th, 2019

Slept with a girl I met on Tinder. Easiest lay ever.

First, chatting on Tinder I did a good job very early of turning the dynamic so she was qualifying to me with almost every message, and I responded by alternating between challenging her to qualify further, and rewarding her then asking to qualify further. So by the time we agreed to meet I was firmly in control.

She was very happy to see me. I took her to a rooftop bar. We grabbed a table and I ordered for us food and drinks. I even picked her drink for her because she at first said she wanted wine, but I myself wanted sangria so I asked if she would have some with me and she agreed. As for food, I asked what she wanted and she asked me to just choose. I paid for everything in the end, btw, like I always do nowadays. I know Chase says not to and in the past I didn't, but at this point I make so much more than all the girls I date, I WANT to pay. I often pay for friends the first time we hang out as well. So it comes from a place of strength, not weakness.

Anyways, at first we just talked. Deep diving and I don't think I even set any chase frames. After a while, as I was saying something nice about her, I reached out to brush her hair to the side. No push back, so a few seconds later I started touching her neck. From there I progressively escalated the touch. We kissed, and after that first kiss she would pull me in to kiss her again every once in a while.

me: Too bad we're in this bar full of people.
her: Later we won't be.
...
me (while stroking her back): You know, I love dresses, but sometimes I wish you were wearing a shirt so there was room for me to slip a hand underneath and touch your skin.
her: You'll feel my skin later.

Around the time we finished the food and drinks, our waitress came by to say it was going to rain so they were headed inside. It didn't rain at any point so I don't know what that waitress was talking about, but whatever. I got the check and started talking logistics because I was staying at a hostel and didn't feel comfortable taking her there. My girl had a roommate and said she would likely be home. She seemed a bit hesitant, but then said we could go to her place. I gave her the option of going straight to her place, or heading over to another bar closer to where she lived. She said lets stay here a bit longer and then go. We went downstairs to the lounge area and sat where there was a big window with a view. I touched her some more and she pulled me in for kisses and snuggled up next to me.

Then we left and since earlier I had sensed a bit of hesitation about taking me to her place, outside I said that I'd invite her to my place, but it's a hostel and I hadn't even seen the room yet so I wasn't sure if it was a place I'd want to take her. She said it's totally fine and we can go to her place. Not really any hesitation anymore. She said we should take an uber there and I offered to get it, but she got it.

In the car we talked some, but were mostly silent. Playing with each others' hands the whole way. Arrived at her place and the roommate was gone, which was great. She took me to her room and gave herself to me with 0 resistance.

On tinder she looked pretty cute, but in person was only passable. To illustrate: I could have slept with her again Sunday before leaving town. I would have, but it was out of my way so I decided to skip it.

 

[determined]

FR: Sunday, May 19th, 2019

Escalated on a girl sitting next to me on a plane. When I sat down she was already sleeping with an eye mask on, so I didn't get a good look at her until she got to the bathroom, but then I noticed she actually looked pretty good.

When she returned I commented on how she's wearing a tight dress on a plane. She said it's comfortable and I said, "I don't want to know what you wear when you go out then."

I did a good amount of qualifying and disqualifying and basically this girl just talked and talked at me. I didn't have much time on this flight, so I had to escalate quickly and there would be risk she wouldn't be ready for it yet. She was connecting to another city, though, so this was my only opportunity.

I reached the point of touching her leg, arm, side, and back pretty freely. She didn't touch me back, and gave some very weak token verbal resistance.

 

[determined]

FR: Thursday, May 23rd, 2019

Did only 2 approaches today, but I think there were takeaways from both.

First one, I was at the mall with my sister and she wanted to check out a store. I saw a beautiful girl sitting near the store so said I'd wait outside. Then I went to talk to that girl.

me: Are you a tourist or local?
her: What?
me: Are you a tourist or local?
her, with a look of "I'm not interested, don't hit on me": Why do you ask?
me, sitting down next to her: I'm curious.
pause
her: I'm not from here
me: Where are you from?
her: What?
I realize I've been speaking softly, which I often do. I raise the volume and slow things down.
me: Where are you from?
her: Why does it matter?
me: Maybe it matters, depends where you're from
her: Romania
me: Oh, I hear you guys have the most complicated language
don't remember her response, but she brightened up a bit
me: I only know one person from Moldova, and her family speaks Romanian bla bla bla

Now she opened up completely and we had a good interaction. She's a dancer in town with for a performance and her crew mates were in the store. I said I'm also waiting for my sister so we're together.

When I brought up meeting again while we're in town she said she can't because she's with her crew the whole time. I changed the subject, intending to bring it back up later.

She received a call from one of her friends in the store and I noticed my sister was sitting and waiting for us. Since the girl wanted to show me pictures of her town, I told her to show me quickly, then said

me: See that girl in the red dress?
her: Is that your sister?
me: Yes. I guess she finished and she's so nice she just sat down quietly to wait. So tell you what: I'm traveling right now and will probably reach Romania. Probably not your little town, but maybe it will work out. So how about I take your number and maybe we'll meet again.
her: Sure!
Gave me her humber
me: Great, I'll text you today so you have my number, too. And maybe I'll see you in Paris because I don't give up so easily.
her, smiling: Ok

Main takeaway here is this girl definitely did not want to be approached, but I was so cool she changed her mind very quickly. I'm not at the level where I can pull that off consistently - usually a girl either likes me off the bat or doesn't. This time I pulled it off very well, though. Beautiful dancer. 2 weeks later we were still texting and she invited me to visit her home town, so I must have made a decent impression.

Second girl
My sister and I were waiting outside a restaurant for our grandparents and I could see 2 pretty girls sitting by themselves in the patio. I wasn't going to do a completely cold approach in front of my sister, and also I had to choose one of the girls since as soon as I approached one the other would see, so I waited to see if one of them would make eye contact with me. They didn't for a while, until my grandparents arrived and we walked towards them. Boom. Eye contact with one the girls. Then I looked back to see if she'd look again and she did. I gave her a smile and didn't get one back, but it's fine. I had gotten my green light.

I waited for an appropriate moment and then excused myself to walk over to her table. Luckily we were sitting inside so my family didn't have to see. Got a good reaction, but I noticed 2 things:
1. She asked "what?" I was speaking too softly and fast again. I slowed it down and raised the volume
2. My body language (stance) wasn't confident enough. I fixed that when I noticed.

I sat with her and we talked for a bit. I didn't have too long because my family was inside so I asked her relatively quickly. She said no and I tried to recover with a chase frame:

me: Do you know one of the reasons I came to say hi?
her: What?
me: I noticed you looking at me as I walked in the restaurant.
her: Haha, no, I just noticed your eyes. You have pretty eyes.

No go despite some some more persistence, so I walked away.

I think it was my initial body language and voice that killed me. Thanks to the fact that she had noticed me earlier, plus the fact that I fixed my issues, I got a good reception and conversation, but the ship had sailed to get the type of attraction that would get her to go out with me after that short conversation.

Verdict
I need to speak more loudly and slowly on the initial approach, and also make sure my body language is assertive yet confident. I know I'm often weak there, but it's hard to remember in the moment. With the first girl it didn't hurt me too bad, but with the second it was the difference between success and failure.

 

[aray808311]

Hey I'm from San Antonio, who else is from here? Looking for a wing to go out with.

 

[determined]

Plane girl from 2 posts ago is still texting me and wants me to meet her in Budapest when she will be there in August. So I guess she liked me. Some fun and suggestive texting, but I won't bother to post unless I actually end up seeing her.

 

[determined]

LR: Sunday, May 26th, 2019

When I walked into my hostel, 3 people were eating dinner so I sat with them. 1 guy whom I already knew and 2 Indian girls. The girls were immediately very warm to me. When I asked what their plans were for the night they said they were going to see a bridge at night and invited me to come. I had nothing better to do so I said ok. Actually, I said, "Maybe" to tease them.

As we walk, I talk first to the one girl who's kind of cute (barely passable), but I find out she's engaged. So a bit later I'm talking with the other one, who I'm not into at all, but I flirt anyways. She says they've visited a few other cities and they saw a sex show in Amsterdam, which was boring because the performers weren't wild at all. I said I heard Indian girls were wild in bed, especially those from her city. She said she didn't believe me and I teased her that how can we build a relationship if she doesn't trust me?

She said something about sexual preferences and I asked if she thought she was good. She said yes. I asked how she knew and she said guys had told her. Then she asked if I was any good and I said that no, unfortunately I'm terrible and I'm sorry I won't be able to pleasure her. She said she didn't believe me and that I should answer the question.

This was all on the way to the bridge. And btw she's repeatedly kind of bumping into me as we walk. On the way back, near the hostel, she said, "You still haven't answered the question." I reply, "Maybe I'll tell you the answer later."

At the hostel first the whole group sat down in the common area and she touched me a bit as we talked. Then she and I went to another room. She said she wanted to wash her face and such, so I waited. When she returned she came to sit next to me on the couch in the second room. We were alone. After maybe 10 seconds of talking and light touching I kissed her, then told her to come with me. I took her into the shower because that was the best place in the hostel to be alone.

Now I was very surprised that she acted surprised that I planned to sleep with her and that she said she was on her period. I asked her how she could have been all over me like she had been all night if she wasn't looking to have sex and best I could tell was that her conscious mind didn't realize what she was really aiming for. She also asked how many girls I had slept with and told me she had slept with 6 guys, which was way less than I had assumed based on how forward she was with me. Anyway, I fucked her, but was very surprised at how clueless she was about her own motivations. I wasn't into her (the only reason things had made it so far is that she herself was so forward), and had a very hard time cumming. It was very good that she was leaving the next night because she started to get clingy and I didn't want to spend more time with her. So I was able to do that without being too obvious and disappointed her only a little.

 

[determined]

LR: Tuesday, June 26th, 2019

Met this girl in Amsterdam exactly a week earlier. It was my last day there, and it was very interesting because that evening I was just coming off a magic mushroom trip and feeling amazingly happy and content. I knew it was a good state to approach girls in.

So I'm scouring and first girl I see is this super cute bookish-looking girl. I open and she reacts very well. Based on her accent I point out that she's Russian (Russian girls are the most attractive in the world in my opinion). She had also done some weed earlier - idk how much of it was still in her at that point - but it's very on immediately. Not that she's super sexual or anything, but still clearly interested. I think my high also helped me because I was having trouble paying attention to everything she said. The resulting vibe was like she was my little sister - following me around, nervously seeking my approval, and me pretty nonchalantly leading her. It's my favorite type of interaction because I can just lay back, let the girl qualify herself to me, and then reward her for it with compliments and touch.

I was hungry so first place I took her was a Mexican place and we shared some nachos. She ate very little, but we sat next to each other and had some time to talk, touch, and build comfort and tension.

She often looked at me like she wanted to kiss me and I kept calling her out on it. We did kiss in the restaurant, but it was pretty awkward and I told her we can't do it again.

Next I suggested we walk by the water and headed in the direction of my place. I had seeded earlier that it was a nice airbnb with a balcony, and when we were close I lightly suggested we go up. She wasn't ready and said she preferred to keep walking, so 2 minutes later I suggested we sit by the water. We sat and talked more, and after a while I suggested again to go back to my place. This time she said yes. This whole time she's still often looking at me like she wants to kiss me and I continued calling her out.

We got up to the apartment and I had actually forgotten there was a fireplace as well. She noticed and loved it. We sat on the floor near it and she kept looking at me that same way. We started to make out. I lay her on her back on the floor and only now when I started to pull her shirt up and really touch her did I notice that she had an awesomely tight yoga-body. She said I'm really good at giving compliments and flirting with girls and I'm a Casanova. When I went for her pants she told me she's only had one partner before, her ex whom she was with for like 6 years or something, and they broke up 6 months ago. I had read that she was super into me and ready to go, but maybe I should have escalated differently instead of going for her pants.

I told her it's totally fine and we can just be friends. That was me kind of bluffing to show I'm not needy. It worked well I think, and of course we continued touching each other as we talked after I backed off.

I tried to escalate again once or twice with the same lack of success. After a break, I tried to bluff again by mentioning that it would probably be time for me to sleep soon. I think that was a mistake because she took it way too seriously and decided she needed to leave at midnight because of me. She also mentioned to me that most guys never talked like me that it's ok being just friends - usually when she tells them she wants to be friends they lose interest. So I think that worked in my favor by showing non-neediness. I responded by saying that I think there's a difference between those guys and me because I can SEE that she doesn't want to just be my friend. The way she's looking at me etc. If there was really no spark between us then I'd probably lose interest as well, but since there's a spark I enjoy spending time with her and I really don't need anything from her so I'll do whatever I think will make her happy.

Still, because of my failed bluff she left. However, I remained non-needy till the end. It was my last day in Amsterdam, but she lives in Moscow and I had told her that I'd be in Moscow next week, but I hadn't asked for her phone number or anything. That was the final bluff and this one worked - on her way out she asked if I wanted to take her number and I said, "Sure, why not." So now it would be a very high quality number.

In Moscow I invited her to meet me at a bar. She came dressed very nicely and one of the first things I said to her was that she's more sexy than I remember. That's to immediately re-establish the sexual frame. I also didn't kiss her on the mouth when we hugged, though she looked like she wanted me to. I kissed her on the cheek instead. Not sure if that's better or worse, but it's what I felt like doing.

We had food at the bar as well, and afterwards I said, "I'll get us an Uber?" She preferred to find somewhere nearby to sit instead, so I said sure and we found a spot by the water. After a few minutes I brought up the Uber again and she said sure. We get back to my place, I made tea, we sat on the couch, and I got 0 resistance.

I think my complete lack of neediness was very helpful here. Not sure if I could have closed her that first night in Amsterdam, but the way I acted made her extremely comfortable with me. She told me 2 things after we had sex. First, that she's surprised at herself for how laid back she's being about sleeping with a guy who she knows will leave town in a week. She never thought of herself as this kind of girl. And second, that she's a bit disappointed because in Amsterdam things felt so magical, and now when we met again it wasn't the same. I had felt the same way, Amsterdam was very magical.

 

[determined]

LR: Friday, March 5th, 2021

Met this girl about a month ago off tinder. Invited her straight to my place. We had a really good time and chemistry was there. She's a former salsa teacher and taught me a bit in my living room. But she did not want to get physical at all. Not even kiss. She told me she's a good girl and looking for something serious. That's fine, I don't have expectations.

I didn't text her after that because she wasn't hot enough for me to put in an effort to convince a good girl to change. Few days later she texted me to hang out again. I said ok with no commitment. Couple days later she followed up. I told her that listen, I'm looking for more passionate girls and I think it will be difficult for us to be together. She understood and agreed. I had given her an opening to backtrack, but basically she had to either join my frame or leave me alone.

Then few days ago she texted me again. I took that as a very good sign so invited her to my place again. She came, but again was not comfortable getting physical. I went to kiss her. She turned her head. I put her arm around me while we were looking at my view. She took it off after a few seconds. I put my arm around her and gently pulled her in. She resisted so I aborted. But obviously she wouldn't have come if she wasn't interested...

I persisted pretty relentlessly (but in a fun and sweet way with no pressure). She basically spent the entire night being touched and kissed, and constantly stopping me. Only break was when food arrived.

A turning point came when I asked her why. She said it's because she gets attached easily. She knows I'll leave her country and that she'd miss me. Ah, now I understand. I told her I understood and it's ok. Also proposed the frame of, "yeah, something serious with me is impossible. What would you regret more: having a great experience with me and then missing me, or missing your chance to have a connection with me and then wondering what if." She kissed me soon after that. And damn, she was definitely more into the kissing than I was! Like a child who starts to talk and then won't shut up haha.

But anyways, still didn't want to go further. It was slow going. I challenged her to tell me she hadn't fantasized about me. She couldn't. I pointed out that she knew what kind of guy I was so she specifically came to this 2nd date because she wanted me. I sang seductive songs in Spanish to her.

She said she had to go because she had work in the morning (on a Saturday...). Damn why didn't you tell me that and I'd have invited you a different day. I offered to order her uber, but she wanted to order her own. Yet she didn't order. So I kept escalating. She kept saying she needs to go. I replied that yeah, she should. Now the objection was no longer "no sex." It was "I want to, but can't. We can meet another time when I don't have work in the morning."

Eventually we ended up in my bed. She asked if I have condoms. Yes. She asked if I had wine. Seriously woman, you want to drink NOW? It's late and I don't feel like it... But she wanted wine to relax. So fine I got us some and chatted with her until her 2 glasses kicked in.

Afterwards she told me how gentle and patient I was with her. She'd never slept with a guy before outside of a relationship, and it's been 6 months since she broke up with her ex. So, good job me.

 

[determined]

LR: Saturday, March 6th, 2021

Met this girl off a dating app. I spent my Saturday exploring a new neighborhood so invited her to join me. Damn she was hot. 20 years old and exactly the look I fantasize about. Overall it was very smooth.

We walked around a bit to find a restaurant. She mentioned that she'd just quit her job and I asked if it was because she wanted to have more time to hang out with me. She brought up sharing food and I said we're a team so we have to share everything. She was super cute about ordering food, trying to help me pick before picking herself. So I complemented her on being a caring person. She asked if I had already had a girlfriend in her country. I said no, that I haven't been in the country long enough for that since I don't enter into anything serious so quickly. She said she broke up few months ago with a very long term boyfriend so also wasn't looking to jump into anything. Perfect.

Talked a lot about her life. I started some light touching. Went in for a kiss. Put my head right next to hers. She closed her eyes and didn't resist, but also didn't make the effort of coming the last few inches to me, so I preferred to back off and kiss her later.

I stuck a french fry out of my mouth and tiled my head for her to take it Lady and the Tramp style. I put another fry in my mouth, but this time when she came close I ate it all and pulled my head away. Later she was kissing me hard and I was sitting on the inside with my back against the wall, so I told her I'm trapped and can't escape her. She asked if I wanted to escape. Nope... I spent the whole meal putting french fries seductively in my mouth. Sometimes for her to come and kiss me and sometimes just to make us laugh.

Later she dropped her fork and got some sauce on herself. Some was on her skirt and some on her her stomach between her top and her skirt. I cleaned her skirt with a napkin and her stomach with my tongue. She dropped her fork again and I teased her that she just wants me to lick her again. She touched my leg and got my pants dirty because her hand had food on it. I told her that first she drops her fork for me to lick her, and now she gets my pants dirty so I take them off. I had finished eating and she went to use my fork, so when the waiter asked if we needed a new one, I replied that we're a team so we share.

After dinner I wanted to explore the neighborhood a bit more, so we did that. Then when I saw that parts I wanted to see, I invited her home. She was down.

I opened some wine and very quickly we started getting physical. Lifted her up and sat her on top of me. Than carried her to my bed. She said she has to tell me something. She's on her period. I said it's fine. I know most guys aren't comfortable with that, but it's part of her body. And how can I fully enjoy her body if I'm not comfortable with it. She agreed.

She's soooooo hot.

 

[determined]

LR: Saturday, November 6th, 2021​

Met this girl 3 weeks ago on my way to the supermarket. She was post-workout and on her way somewhere. Nice body, but she was wearing a covid mask so couldn't see her face. Luckily in her WhatsApp photo the face was good.

It was a bit of a long game with the texting. At first she didn't respond. Then to my next text a few days later she did respond, saying she was super busy and moving apts. Sent me a photo of the new apt though was was good investment. I said we should celebrate. Again due to being busy she could only plan for the weekend, which was yesterday.

So we met up at a cafe by my place. She pushed things back because she had to stay at work till 9. Turns out she has 2 businesses - she opened a vegan restaurant where their manager recently quit which is why she has to work so much right now. And also a supplement distribution company. So ambitious and hard-working - exactly my type. And pretty without the mask.

So we're chatting. She says how she's been working so much and it's nice to be out socializing. She does look tired and I say I appreciate her making the effort to come out because I know what it's like to have crazy busy times at work. Oh and also she wanted to pay for us both which is nice. I pushed back a bit and she said I'd pay next time.

She commented that I don't speak much and my answers are short, and that she's talking so much. Partly it's because we're speaking Spanish which I'm not fully fluent in. But I tell her it's because I'm a strong man and that I like girls who talk a lot because talking a lot is more a feminine energy. At first she disagrees and says many guys talk a lot, but after I push back she says that actually it's because they're trying to impress her and it's actually not attractive, so maybe I'm right.

Then things get interesting. Turns out she's bi and for many years has preferred women. Recently some experiences caused her to feel differently and hence why she's out with me. Later I found out she hadn't slept with a guy for 9 years. She says these (drug induced) experiences felt like being reborn. So I joke that it's her second life, and therefore when she sleeps with a guy again it's important for it to be really good because it'll be her first time and you remember your first time for the rest of your life. That second life and her being a virgin turned into our joke throughout the night.

When the cafe was closing after about an hour, I asked if she wanted to keep talking and invited her back to mine. She said she preferred to walk. So we walked a few blocks and she showed me a bar/restaurant she likes. We grabbed a drink.

Now she's making very strong eye contact, which is a pretty straightforward signal for me. I put my arm on neck and leaned in. But she doesn't move even when I pause mid-way to her face, so I back off. She says that it's working well, communicating without talking much (remember how before we'd talked about me being a man of few words). I say that yeah, you can communicate without talking if the connection is right.

Then she said I'm sweet and started touching my face quite heavily. Apparently she's a very touchy person and loves touching people she's close with, which is perfect for me because touch is my #1 love language. We talked about love languages and we are indeed a match. And so we spent the rest of our drink time talking little and mostly touching each other and looking into each other's eyes. Quite intense actually even for me. We also kissed once or twice and this time she did reciprocate leaning in.

When we had almost finished our drinks they were starting to close this place. She asked where we should go next. I asked if she wanted to go back to mine. She looked up in deliberation and didn't answer for a good few seconds, so that gave me my answer and I changed the subject. When we finished our drinks she again wanted to pay even though I said it was my turn. She said my turn is next time we meet.

We left the bar and I started leading towards my place. When we arrived she sat on a barstool which is not my ideal because we can't be next to each other. I sat on the couch with the intention that at some point she'd follow me. I put on some Enrique to show her the Spanish music I like. Then I even started singing along to her haha. She moved over to the couch to turn off the music and said it's better without it. I thought she wanted to hear me sing without the background music, but she said that no, she just wanted silence.

So then I asked, "Then what else is there for us to do ?" Aaaand it was on.

 

[determined]

LR--: Saturday, November 20th, 2021​

I went to the mall yesterday with the intention of buying some shirts and eating a big pre-workout meal because yesterday was work out day. Didn't end up doing any of those things.

As soon as I walked into the mall I see an attractive girl sitting by herself. I had to collect myself for a second because she really was good looking, and also looked like the type of girl who might not want to be approached. But she looked so good.

I opened her saying with a smirk that I like her zebra outfit as she was definitely wearing some forward fashion.

her: Thanks
me: My name is E
her: [no reaction]
me: [waiting for her to give me her name]
her: [silence]
me: What's your name?
her: [gives name, but matter of factly and nothing more]
me: I was about to go eat so can't stay long, but you looked interesting so I came to say hi
her: Oh, hi [ok, good. She's not being bitchy, she's just confused.]
me: Can I sit for a minute?
her: Sure. Where are you from?
me: How do you know I'm not from here?
her: Your accent
me: Ah, right. Sexy accent?
her: Haha, different accent

So it required a bit of confidence to get in there, but we were off to the races.

Chatted for a bit and I found that she had met her friends and now was about to go home. She was just waiting for the rain to die down. I invited her to eat with me and she said sure.

I removed my mask right as I said hi so she could see my smile and other facial expressions. She took off hers as well and without it I could see she was really beautiful. Now I learned she's a professor of philosophy and psychology and has lived abroad a few years. So she's educated and interesting and I'm interested. And if she's a professor she must be older than me even though she doesn't look it, but she didn't want to tell me her exact age and I don't really care so I didn't push for it.

She wanted to eat at a healthy-branded place and those typically serve small portions, so I didn't get my large pre-workout meal, but it's fine because I ended up too occupied to work out yesterday haha.

I let her do most of the talking and part of the time deep dived and gave a lot of interest and approval, while other times looking out the window at the view or only half-paying attention while she talked.

She asked me if I'm happy and I said that yes, I'm so lucky and have everything so it'd be pretty ungrateful for me to complain. I find that's a good line to convey that I have a great life and am a high quality person without bragging.

I asked her what she'd like to have that she doesn't yet. She said to change her job to have more freedom, and love. Easy chase frame that she's looking for love with me.

She said it'd been a while since her last relationship and she even tried dating apps but doesn't like them. We talked about dating apps for a bit. In the past I've had good conversations with girls about it, but in this case I saw it wasn't going in a conducive direction and she was going on about it so I cut her off and changed the subject.

She told me she wants to become some sort of content creator instead of a professor and that's she was at the mall, to shoot some stuff with her friends. I asked her to show me and it was a good segue for me to move to sit next to her in the booth.

She also told me one arm of her content that she's just starting is that her instagram followers can ask her questions about sexuality and with her psychological background she will answer them. Interesting. She told me about one person asking about threesomes and so we got into that topic. She asked me if I've ever had a threesome and that gave me an opportunity to share my perspective on sex which I think girls like. I told her that I hadn't had a threesome. That I'd be open to trying it, but I don't think I'd like it as much as sex with 1 person because for me the best part of sex is the emotional connection and intimacy, and I don't think I'd be able to get that from a threesome. But that I'd be open to trying it - what kind of girl would she want us to do it with? Then we made up some fake requirements for this girl haha.

That's the gist of our conversation. After eating I felt like I could invite her home. So I did. We'd agreed before that we both like sweet wines, and I have some at home so I invited her for that. She said no. I asked why. She said it's very fast since we just met. But I could see she wasn't sure of herself at all, so I laughed and said it doesn't need to be some big decision, she can leave after 5 minutes if she wants. She asked if I live close. Yes.

I ordered us an uber and here I fucked up, but it turned out fine. This mall is large and confusing with exits on different levels. So I didn't understand where this uber would pick us up. Even though I asked people who worked at the mall, we still ended up in the wrong place. We got wet because the rain was still pouring, had to backtrack, and the uber cancelled on us because we took too long. So not good leading and I started to worry that I'd lose her during this critical transition period. But I kept it light hearted, saying we were having an adventure and that it'd be a good story of how we met, and we were fine. We ordered another uber which was 13 mins away due to high demand with the rain, so to pass the time I took her into a starbucks to order something. There was a long line because of the rain and our drinks weren't ready in time so we had to ditch to catch our 2nd uber, but Starbucks served its purpose of killing time during the transition period.

We got in the uber. I pulled her close because we were wet and cold. Arriving at my place, I changed my shirt and offered her one. She accepted. I joked that now my shirt would smell like her so that'll be enjoyable. She had me smell her to make sure I liked the smell. I did .

So yeah, we talked on the couch. She wasn't sitting super close to me or making strong eye contact (she was at the restaurant, but not now). So that told me she's a bit nervous and not 100% comfortable at my place, so I just chatted with her. The conversation flowed well and at some point I realized that we'd been talking for a long time without any flirting and I really wasn't moving us forward.

So I started steering the conversation in that direction. I don't remember all of it, but I remember that when she finished her glass of wine before me and asked for more, I teased her for drinking so fast and then looked her in the eyes and seductively said that "some things are better done slowly. Maybe one day I'll teach you you." She laughed and asked for examples. After filling up her glass I told her to give me her hand and I'll show her. I pulled her close. I told her she needs to look into my eyes because she wasn't. Then I leaned in for the kiss. She didn't seem ready so I pulled back. But I got the point across which is what's important.

Man, I'm getting tired of writing. But short story is we talked, we danced, we made out. She also likes compliments so I gave her some and also teased her about wanting my approval. We killed the bottle of wine. She told me she hadn't had sex in a year or something and this is moving very fast for her. During dancing I picked her up and took her to bed. By the end of the night (7 hours after we had originally met), I was touching her everywhere but she was still clothed, albeit with her bra part of the time pulled down to give me access. I was naked with her playing with my body. She kept saying how much she liked it, how excited she was, and that this is so crazy. She had this surprised look on her face which I really liked.

And we had a great time. That was as far as she was ready to go, which is fine by me. If anyone thinks I could have taken things further, I'm interested to hear. She said she didn't want to leave me excited like this and I think she wanted to give me a handjob to completion, but I turned it down because I don't really want to be in that position of cumming without her and her doing me a favor.

Re the escalation process, she very rarely had to tell me to stop or slow down - I'd notice her body language and do it myself, and I think that's something girls appreciate a lot. She also commented a few times on how I so confidently go after what I want and that I'm forward. I made a point of explaining how I'm reading and reacting to her and that even though it's true I'm confident, a good leader leads for the good of their followers and doesn't just do whatever they themselves want.

Then she left. I invited her to sleep over, but she said she wouldn't be able to fall asleep at my place. Aaand I hope I see her again because this one's a keeper. She's currently sending me long texts which is a good sign.

Not sure if I could have I taken it further or if there was a way to run things better. Interested if someone has opinions.

 

[mist]

LR--: Saturday, November 20th, 2021​

I went to the mall yesterday with the intention of buying some shirts and eating a big pre-workout meal because yesterday was work out day. Didn't end up doing any of those things.

As soon as I walked into the mall I see an attractive girl sitting by herself. I had to collect myself for a second because she really was good looking, and also looked like the type of girl who might not want to be approached. But she looked so good.

I opened her saying with a smirk that I like her zebra outfit as she was definitely wearing some forward fashion.


So it required a bit of confidence to get in there, but we were off to the races.

Chatted for a bit and I found that she had met her friends and now was about to go home. She was just waiting for the rain to die down. I invited her to eat with me and she said sure.

I removed my mask right as I said hi so she could see my smile and other facial expressions. She took off hers as well and without it I could see she was really beautiful. Now I learned she's a professor of philosophy and psychology and has lived abroad a few years. So she's educated and interesting and I'm interested. And if she's a professor she must be older than me even though she doesn't look it, but she didn't want to tell me her exact age and I don't really care so I didn't push for it.

She wanted to eat at a healthy-branded place and those typically serve small portions, so I didn't get my large pre-workout meal, but it's fine because I ended up too occupied to work out yesterday .

I let her do most of the talking and part of the time deep dived and gave a lot of interest and approval, while other times looking out the window at the view or only half-paying attention while she talked.

She asked me if I'm happy and I said that yes, I'm so lucky and have everything so it'd be pretty ungrateful for me to complain. I find that's a good line to convey that I have a great life and am a high quality person without bragging.

I asked her what she'd like to have that she doesn't yet. She said to change her job to have more freedom, and love. Easy chase frame that she's looking for love with me.

She said it'd been a while since her last relationship and she even tried dating apps but doesn't like them. We talked about dating apps for a bit. In the past I've had good conversations with girls about it, but in this case I saw it wasn't going in a conducive direction and she was going on about it so I cut her off and changed the subject.

She told me she wants to become some sort of content creator instead of a professor and that's she was at the mall, to shoot some stuff with her friends. I asked her to show me and it was a good segue for me to move to sit next to her in the booth.

She also told me one arm of her content that she's just starting is that her instagram followers can ask her questions about sexuality and with her psychological background she will answer them. Interesting. She told me about one person asking about threesomes and so we got into that topic. She asked me if I've ever had a threesome and that gave me an opportunity to share my perspective on sex which I think girls like. I told her that I hadn't had a threesome. That I'd be open to trying it, but I don't think I'd like it as much as sex with 1 person because for me the best part of sex is the emotional connection and intimacy, and I don't think I'd be able to get that from a threesome. But that I'd be open to trying it - what kind of girl would she want us to do it with? Then we made up some fake requirements for this girl haha.

That's the gist of our conversation. After eating I felt like I could invite her home. So I did. We'd agreed before that we both like sweet wines, and I have some at home so I invited her for that. She said no. I asked why. She said it's very fast since we just met. But I could see she wasn't sure of herself at all, so I laughed and said it doesn't need to be some big decision, she can leave after 5 minutes if she wants. She asked if I live close. Yes.

I ordered us an uber and here I fucked up, but it turned out fine. This mall is large and confusing with exits on different levels. So I didn't understand where this uber would pick us up. Even though I asked people who worked at the mall, we still ended up in the wrong place. We got wet because the rain was still pouring, had to backtrack, and the uber cancelled on us because we took too long. So not good leading and I started to worry that I'd lose her during this critical transition period. But I kept it light hearted, saying we were having an adventure and that it'd be a good story of how we met, and we were fine. We ordered another uber which was 13 mins away due to high demand with the rain, so to pass the time I took her into a starbucks to order something. There was a long line because of the rain and our drinks weren't ready in time so we had to ditch to catch our 2nd uber, but Starbucks served its purpose of killing time during the transition period.

We got in the uber. I pulled her close because we were wet and cold. Arriving at my place, I changed my shirt and offered her one. She accepted. I joked that now my shirt would smell like her so that'll be enjoyable. She had me smell her to make sure I liked the smell. I did .

So yeah, we talked on the couch. She wasn't sitting super close to me or making strong eye contact (she was at the restaurant, but not now). So that told me she's a bit nervous and not 100% comfortable at my place, so I just chatted with her. The conversation flowed well and at some point I realized that we'd been talking for a long time without any flirting and I really wasn't moving us forward.

So I started steering the conversation in that direction. I don't remember all of it, but I remember that when she finished her glass of wine before me and asked for more, I teased her for drinking so fast and then looked her in the eyes and seductively said that "some things are better done slowly. Maybe one day I'll teach you you." She laughed and asked for examples. After filling up her glass I told her to give me her hand and I'll show her. I pulled her close. I told her she needs to look into my eyes because she wasn't. Then I leaned in for the kiss. She didn't seem ready so I pulled back. But I got the point across which is what's important.

Man, I'm getting tired of writing. But short story is we talked, we danced, we made out. She also likes compliments so I gave her some and also teased her about wanting my approval. We killed the bottle of wine. She told me she hadn't had sex in a year or something and this is moving very fast for her. During dancing I picked her up and took her to bed. By the end of the night (7 hours after we had originally met), I was touching her everywhere but she was still clothed, albeit with her bra part of the time pulled down to give me access. I was naked with her playing with my body. She kept saying how much she liked it, how excited she was, and that this is so crazy. She had this surprised look on her face which I really liked.

And we had a great time. That was as far as she was ready to go, which is fine by me. If anyone thinks I could have taken things further, I'm interested to hear. She said she didn't want to leave me excited like this and I think she wanted to give me a handjob to completion, but I turned it down because I don't really want to be in that position of cumming without her and her doing me a favor.

Re the escalation process, she very rarely had to tell me to stop or slow down - I'd notice her body language and do it myself, and I think that's something girls appreciate a lot. She also commented a few times on how I so confidently go after what I want and that I'm forward. I made a point of explaining how I'm reading and reacting to her and that even though it's true I'm confident, a good leader leads for the good of their followers and doesn't just do whatever they themselves want.

Then she left. I invited her to sleep over, but she said she wouldn't be able to fall asleep at my place. Aaand I hope I see her again because this one's a keeper. She's currently sending me long texts which is a good sign.

Not sure if I could have I taken it further or if there was a way to run things better. Interested if someone has opinions.

Such a nice Journal man.

7 years of development here too starting from college at 21. Very inspirational.

Hopefully you continue to update it and look back on things

Cheers

 

[determined]

LR-: Thursday, November 25th, 2021

Met this girl online. It actually took over a month to meet her in person. She's busy working 6 days a week and so it was difficult to pin down a time with her. Also when I saw her instagram I decided I wasn't confident she looks good enough, and I also knew she's not really in my circles in terms of education etc and so I stopped trying at some point. But last week I didn't have much going on and so I texted her and finally she was ready.

I invited her straight over because like I said, I wasn't super into her and so didn't feel like putting in the effort of going out. But when I met her in person she actually looks quite good. So nice surprise. This was 11am because she works in the afternoons until night.

We broke the touch barrier quickly and took it in a flirty direction. However, she wouldn't kiss, saying she prefers to get to know someone first. Fine by me. However, through persistence and good vibes I got it done.

She said she likes to dance so I put on some music and invited her to dance, but she was embarrassed to. She said she used to go out dancing much more when she was younger, but now doesn't have time. I told her she should learn to dance in the living room. But she still didn't want to dance.

I noticed the lines on her hand are really deep. She asked if I know how to read palms and I said of course, I know everything. So I "predicted" that she's very sweet and fun, but very busy, and so she needs to learn to dance in the living room. Ha nailed it.

Speaking of lines in the body, she started talking about wrinkles. She told me I look young for my age and I said that yes, with our good genetics our kids will be very beautiful. I took the opportunity to start touching her face.

Giving her the romantic eyes so she told me she's intimated by me. Telling her that good, she should be.

Gradually escalating the touch until she was ready to kiss. For the 2nd kiss I moved my head close to hers and told her that she needs to pull me in. She didn't want to and I told her I wouldn't kiss her until she pulls me in. Took a while and a few more teases but eventually she did. Always funny when a girl says no to something, and a bit later on she's asking/begging for more of it.

By this time we were in bed, and from here things went quite smoothly. She said she can't have sex because of her period. I asked her if she wanted to have sex with me and this was the only reason why she's not and she said yes. I didn't fight her too hard on it because she seemed pretty certain and said she'd tried sex on her period before and didn't like it. Also, only on Monday I had a mishap with another girl on her period and still haven't put back my mattress protector, so I didn't want to risk making a mess and destroying the mattress.

She started to go down on me and I let her because unlike the girl from the last post, I wouldn't be upset if she didn't want to see me again.

In the elevator down as she was leaving she put on a sweater. It was red and had these little balls hanging off that looked kind of like small Christmas ornaments so I asked her if it's for Christmas, that she could be Mrs. Santa Claus, and where are my gifts? She replied that I'm a very bad boy and she doesn't have any gifts for me. Haha made me laugh.

 

[determined]

Aay, girl from Nov 20 doesn't want to see me again. Turns out she's 40 (man good genetics on that girl), and "we're looking for different things." She doesn't want to get more specific, but we can guess what she means. Gonna try to save it still, but honestly I'm bummed.