Gameboy's Journal

[gameboy]

Okay, apathy seems to be ebbing off, albeit slowly. I guess it was just fatigue from doing the same shit every day. Needed a couple days' break.

Today I did one "hello" opener to a cute little girl, she was wearing huge headphones though (and a rainbow handbag) and may not have heard me. Didn't get a reaction either way.

Then saw another girl coming towards me, she was wearing full war paint and looked quite serious. Walking fast. I liked her hair though, dyed partly copper and glowing. When we were close enough I said "I love your hair!" to her. Fully expected to get ignored, she said thank you though but kept walking. That was nice.

In the afternoon I had to go to a different part of town, walked around there a bit hoping to open but walking around in the heat was like torture. No further opens today.

 

[Marty]

But it's still hard for me getting them to hook.

The last hook was that older woman in a cafe, who said she was working for the government. That was cool, but I didn't like her enough to ask for her number. The girl I talked to today didn't hook at all, she just gave me brief polite responses to my questions.

Indeed. The hook is a tricky one. Probably I have girls "fail to open" at least as many times as I have them hook, even if I am moderately selective in approaching based on at least mild indicators of interest.

And then even if you have a natural conversation and number-close, if there is no connection built, most often the girl will not reply.

The third other one was from Venezuela, and seemed a bit neurotic. She was uncomfortable when I went for the kiss and decided to leave.

I've searched for the field reports I wrote at the time, in case you're interested:
FR 1
FR 2
FR 3

Thanks, I read all of them; of these I liked the third one best.

 

[gameboy]

Damn. Today I'm angry at myself.

I saw quite a few single girls on the beach. At least two of them openly checked me out. Both were okay to good looking. And I didn't approach. Why? Because I was in a bad mood (because of some other stuff that happened). And now I'm in a bad mood beacuse I didn't approach.

Gotta do better than this. I have to stop rejecting myself. Approaching is self expression, and self acceptance.

 

[Marty]

Approaching is self expression, and self acceptance.

This.

 

[gameboy]

Man what a day. I was in good spirits in the morning, saying hi to cute girls in the street but not really opening. Then in the afternoon it was really hot, and my energy dropped. I went to the beach and cooled off in the water, but couldn't find suitable girls to approach. I remember one that was by herself and looked cute, but she was far too young. When I saw her throw an IOI at a kid walking by that was certainly not 18... I decided this one's not for me lol.

Had a nasty episode when some big guy got super pissed at me for something I apparently did inadvertently. I had @ChrisXKiss 's recent experience in mind and was super apologetic... In the end succeeded in calming him down, and quickly changed the area to leave the bad vibes behind.

I walked around some more, then grabbed the bike to drive to a different part of the beach. Took me a while to become internally calm again.

While riding, I finally saw a girl sitting on a wall by herself, and plucked up the courage to ask her for her favorite color. She seemed to think about it a bit and then said "green". I told her "Green? Yeah green is lovely!" but chickened out of continuing the conversation. I'm not sure if she was attractive or not, she had large sunglasses on but otherwise was okay looking. I wasn't prepared to flirt with her more since I was on the bike and she was sitting on a wall above me, so I said Thanks and Goodbye.

Parked the bike and went to the sea side. Saw another girl by herself, but she had huge headphones on. I've approached girls with headphones on before, but something about her vibe didn't make me want to approach her. I guess we can chalk it up to AA.

Sat down somewhere. There were 2 pretty girls nearby talking. One had a blue bikini on. While I was sitting, the blue bikini girl suddenly turned toward me and said Hello! I said Hi back, but she turned back to her friend. I deliberated for a while but wasn't sure how I knew her.

In the end I decided to walk 2 steps over to her and tell her "Actually I don't remember where I know you from!" - This felt like an approach, even though she had said Hi first. She said "From X restaurant!" - a restaurant that I used to go to often, but rarely go anymore. I chatted with her a bit, she's not working there any more but presented me her friend who works there now as a waiter. I know she has a boyfriend who's also working there, in fact I mentioned him to her saying "Oh I haven't been at X in ages. Actually I went there once recently, and your boyfriend was there" and she was like "Oh yes he's still there" so I know they're still together.

After a short while I said "good to see you" and left. I guess I should have stayed to chat longer, but I felt I was interrupting the convo she had with her friend. The friend actually also looked quite nice, maybe I should have hit on her instead! But I didn't think of it at all in the moment. Which is a pity. I hope I will one day soon remember to stay in sets longer.

And possibly I should get lunch at that restaurant one of these days

Walked around some more as the sun was setting, and saw one girl in a way-too-elegant red dress sitting on the beach. I complimented her on the dress as I walked by. She just made some weird grimace. She moved her mouth so it's technically possible she said thanks, but if she did I didn't hear it. Oh well better to get rejected than rejecting yourself!

Doing that last opener I felt I was now warmed up, but the sun was going down and it was getting dark.

TAKEAWAYS FOR TODAY

Happy how I handled the episode with the angry guy. That could have turned real nasty, he was big and he did look like the violent sort.

I should have stayed in set with the favorite color girl, she seemed really nice and pensative. But my anxiousness (is that a word?) was still too high.

Glad I opened the red dress girl even though she wasn't receptive.

Need to stay in the sets longer!

 

[AspiringStoic]

Had a nasty episode when some big guy got super pissed at me for something I apparently did inadvertently.

Was this because you approached a girl or something random?

Need to stay in the sets longer!

Very apt takeaway. Unless you really stand there and continue the conversation for 20-30 seconds and she clearly snubs you, you can't really count it as a rejection.

 

[gameboy]

Was this because you approached a girl or something random?

No, it had nothing to do with approaching.

 

[bgwh]

But I didn't think of it at all in the moment.

Need to stay in the sets longer!

I've noticed this is a pattern for a lot of us doing journals like. Like I had so many sets where I go home and i'm like "duude, I should have xyz", but didn't think of it in the moment". Same with other forms of auto-rejecting like ejecting from set too quickly.

Man what a day. I was in good spirits in the morning, saying hi to cute girls in the street but not really opening

I know you're a similar situation where you're in a country where people generally don't say hello back. Has this improved over time, do you find they respond?

 

[gameboy]

I know you're a similar situation where you're in a country where people generally don't say hello back. Has this improved over time, do you find they respond?

Oh yes they do. Of course many are on the phone, in a rush, or just plain ignore me. But some will say Hello back, and some will even smile and seem happy I said Hi. It depends a lot on my own state.

 

[ChrisXKiss]

I had @ChrisXKiss 's recent experience in mind and was super apologetic... In the end succeeded in calming him down, and quickly changed the area to leave the bad vibes behind.

Glad I’m helping somehow But for real, great way of handling it.

Need to stay in the sets longer!

This is something good to have in mind if you eject too early for sure. I only want to say that sometimes the vibe is just polite and nothing will come out anyway.

What I mean is that I have chatted with girls for long times, with things going nowhere. Other times they tell you they have a boyfriend after you have even flirted with them, and you realise they just wanted to feel still desirable while in the relationship.

So depending on the feeling you get from the girl, it’s possible that even if you stayed longer, nothing would have happened. In situations where I feel vibes like that, I just ask if they are single to know whether staying or leaving makes more sense time wise.

 

[gameboy]

Just got back home after a frustrating day in field, didn't see any approachable interesting girls today. Just reading a few posts here though and I'm already motivated to go out again tomorrow

This forum rocks!

 

[iceberg slim]

Today I was super lethargic, barely got out of bed or left the house for groceries, but ended up doing 20 approaches today like a breeze

Wow where did you do 20 approaches? That's a shitload. I've done like 12 in a day and was pretty gassed afterwards. I agree though that tracking approaches is motivating and fun. It can be a bummer though when you aren't doing as many as you hoped. Last summer for exmple I did like 300 approaches and this summer I'm nowhere near that, which is disappointing (and my lay count reflects that). The other side of the coin though is that more approaches isn't necessarily better. You could do a bunch of low quality apps that go nowhere versus a couple highly targeted approaches that lead to somewhere. But there is something to be said about getting your reps in.

 

[gameboy]

Just wanted to do a quick update, even though there's not much to report. It's been super hot here recently, and I'm taking it easy until temperatures become a bit more comfortable again.

I did a few drive-by approaches. The most notable one was a girl that I think was checking me out. She was sitting on a bench eating. I walked over and said "Enjoy your meal". I noticed she had lots of tats on her arm. She smiled and said thanks. I should probably have stayed in set and followed up with something like "Do you work around here?" because that was what it looked like. But I didn't... it was the first opener of the day and intended as a warm-up. Still could have said something more I guess.

Shortly after I did a compliment opener to a girl in a 2-set. One was a girl who's t-shirt I liked, it was in English so I told her in English "Nice shirt!" She looked at me, but didn't reply. I never know which language to use here

Today I saw a 2F-set of two girls who I think were very attractive (I didn't check them out much before opening, because I didn't want to stare). Both were wearing bikinis, coming toward me frontally. I was on the way to the beach so I asked them "How's the beach?" Again, they looked at me, but didn't reply. Guess for 2-sets you really need to pick a target and address her very specifically, otherwise none of the two will feel like she is the one that should answer you. Or alternatively, stop them with "excuse me, quick question" before you deliver the opener.

Oh and the other day I met up with a female friend on the beach. She's a bit chubby and physically not much my type, but I like to hang out with her because she's fun to talk to. I sat close to her most of the time and did a bit of light teasing and touching, just for fun. Had a good time but keeping it platonical.

 

[AspiringStoic]

Just wanted to do a quick update, even though there's not much to report. It's been super hot here recently, and I'm taking it easy until temperatures become a bit more comfortable again.

I did a few drive-by approaches. The most notable one was a girl that I think was checking me out. She was sitting on a bench eating. I walked over and said "Enjoy your meal". I noticed she had lots of tats on her arm. She smiled and said thanks. I should probably have stayed in set and followed up with something like "Do you work around here?" because that was what it looked like. But I didn't... it was the first opener of the day and intended as a warm-up. Still could have said something more I guess.

Shortly after I did a compliment opener to a girl in a 2-set. One was a girl who's t-shirt I liked, it was in English so I told her in English "Nice shirt!" She looked at me, but didn't reply. I never know which language to use here

Today I saw a 2F-set of two girls who I think were very attractive (I didn't check them out much before opening, because I didn't want to stare). Both were wearing bikinis, coming toward me frontally. I was on the way to the beach so I asked them "How's the beach?" Again, they looked at me, but didn't reply. Guess for 2-sets you really need to pick a target and address her very specifically, otherwise none of the two will feel like she is the one that should answer you. Or alternatively, stop them with "excuse me, quick question" before you deliver the opener.

Oh and the other day I met up with a female friend on the beach. She's a bit chubby and physically not much my type, but I like to hang out with her because she's fun to talk to. I sat close to her most of the time and did a bit of light teasing and touching, just for fun. Had a good time but keeping it platonical.

I feel you. Same here with the temperature. Really saps your energy. Been missing your updates to be honest I always look forward to them. That is the great thing about this forum. Following others who are also undertaking this epic journey.

I think autumn should be a great time for us. Ideal temperatures for daygame.

 

[Higher]

I never know which language to use here

Are u fluent in the local language? And do u open in it by default?

 

[gameboy]

Are u fluent in the local language? And do u open in it by default?

Yes, I am. I open in the language that I think will work best, so if she looks like a tourist I'll use English sometimes. But in general I use the local language. Some girls don't understand me and then I switch to English.

However, when she just ignores me, it gets me guessing whether I picked the wrong language.

 

[gameboy]

All right. Gonna start approaching again tomorrow. It's tough in August, but doing nothing at all sucks even more.

Plan is to open 1-4 girls per day until the end of August. For starters, any opener will do, as long as she gets a chance to reply. So e.g. asking for her favorite color counts, but just saying "hi" walking by doesn't unless I follow it up with something.

 

[gameboy]

Been out a bit around noon. No opens so far. First cute girl I saw got genuine AA, she seemed to be searching for her way on the phone and my AA excuse was "I don't want to scare her like a beggar". Then I got distracted by something and when I remembered I wanted to open her she was already far away.

Walked around some more but it was really uncomfortable with the heat. Saw one more single girl but she was talking on the phone, facing a house portal. Not a good circumstance to approach. Then later came across a 3-set walking slowly towards me, but I made some gesture of exasperation from the heat and I think that was already enough to land me in the "unattractive/creppy" territory. As I walked by them they were of course busy looking the other way pointedly.

I realize these are all excuses and in hindsight should had opened at least the first and 3rd set. Maybe not the one talking on phone. Going out again later in the afternoon, by then it should be cooler. Can't be that hard to get at least one approach in. Gotta remember how much fun it is!

 

[bgwh]

Been out a bit around noon. No opens so far. First cute girl I saw got genuine AA, she seemed to be searching for her way on the phone and my AA excuse was "I don't want to scare her like a beggar". Then I got distracted by something and when I remembered I wanted to open her she was already far away.

Walked around some more but it was really uncomfortable with the heat. Saw one more single girl but she was talking on the phone, facing a house portal. Not a good circumstance to approach. Then later came across a 3-set walking slowly towards me, but I made some gesture of exasperation from the heat and I think that was already enough to land me in the "unattractive/creppy" territory. As I walked by them they were of course busy looking the other way pointedly.

I realize these are all excuses and in hindsight should had opened at least the first and 3rd set. Maybe not the one talking on phone. Going out again later in the afternoon, by then it should be cooler. Can't be that hard to get at least one approach in. Gotta remember how much fun it is!

One way I got over the "too late I'm already in creepy territory" was to open anyway, just to "test" the assumption. I don't know what course I learned it from, but it was an approaching/aa course, and he was like "you have to test your assumptions, just to see how often you're wrong".

I specifically opened all the ones where I was like "oh it's too late, she already saw me hesitating and hovering", and it was wrong in all by but one case (they opened fine despite the hovering and akward hesitating previous). And even in that one case where it didn't open well, her response would have been better if my approach was better.

Ironically the "I hesitated too much, they'll respond badly" is self-fullfilling prophecy and it was in that one approach. For the others I was like "ah screw it, don't care what they think, me go open, what happens happens" and those other ones opened just fine.

 

[gameboy]

TLDR: Finally got over AA and did 2 opens on the beach.

So much KJing here on the forum recently, with guys asking the most hypothetical of questions... I completely agree with Chase that if you're not actually in field everything else is a form of mental masturbation. I'd even go further and say it's really another symptom of AA.

Not gonna lie here, I still personally have a lot of AA myself. It took me quite a bit of cycling and walking around today until I finally managed to do the first open. Did some rounds in the center, but no luck there. Both my openers today happened on the beach.

GIRL 1

I saw a girl in a bikini, standing by herself, looking down at her phone. She was facing away from me. Good body, pretty tall, lots of tats.

I had the bike in hand and pushed it right past her so as to not open from behind, stopped for a second in front of her, then said "Excuse me, quick question..." She slowly looked up. I smiled at her and asked "Can you tell me your astrological sign?" She paused for a split second, then said "Aquarius" with a serious face. I said "Aquarius eh? Okay." and followed up with "Just curious!" but she was already looking down at her phone again.

I walked away, bike in hand. I was feeling like a complete clown on one hand, but grinning and feeling good on the other because I had gotten that all-important warmup opener out of the way.

GIRL 2

Parked the bike and walked over to the beach. Saw a girl sitting by herself in the shade of some palm trees. The girl was really a hottie. She gave me a quick look as I walked by her, but quickly looked the other way. That's an IOD (indication of disinterest) in my book, so I kept walking. I thought, "she's probably waiting for someone, probably her bf".

I wanted to get in the water, cause I was really hot. So I went for an extended swim, dried off in the sun, then finally walked back to where my bike was.

The girl was still there, and still by herself. She seemed to be watching some guys who were playing football. Either one of them was with her, but I didn't see any guy's stuff near where she was sitting. Or she was just hoping to meet one of them.

Anyway, I decided I can't let this one pass and walked past right in front of her. Still found her amazing! At least a 9, possibly 10. And she wasn't even staring at her phone. The moment I talked to her she was actually looking down at the floor, letting her body collapse momentarily in a lazy sort of way. I asked her "You're not from here, are you?" She said "No" so I asked where she was from, she said X country.

She told me she doesn't speak the local language right away, so I asked if she speaks English. She said a little bit. Asked her a bit how long she was staying, what she had been up to, where she was from in X country, the usual get-to-know you stuff. At first she replied but after a short while it started to feel like pulling teeth. The girl didn't understand half of what I said, and neither would she give me much to work with. Once I knew for sure she was definitely not interested, I said "All right, nice to meet you. Have a good day!" and shook her hand, just for style. You never know who might be looking on. Maybe even the next girl (happened to me once actually)!

I'm pretty happy about this one! I did what I could. I mean I read her as not being interested right from the start and taking that into consideration I still made a decent attempt. It feels good to be approaching again!