How do I get girls at work that I like?

[Destiny]

Somebody posted this, if I’m not mistaken it was Skills: https://www.theskillsmethod.com/the-2-types-of-men-when-it-comes-to-seduction/

This is also incorrect and outdated, it’s only partially true. It somehow presumes that provider is a guy who doesn’t like sex or is bad, asexual. Don’t believe that, there are guys who are bad but there are also great guys in relationships who provide great sex. Think about it: classical provider may wait little bit, couple weeks or months, but then he gets laid multiple times a week for months or years. This provider has more sexual encounters with one woman in one year than lover does all together with bunch of women, and virtually without any effort (other than initial waiting). Read it one more time, good provider has an access to sex easily 365 times a year without any effort. So much sex he is tired of it. Top lover can’t beat that. The woman develops way deeper connection with provider over time than she can ever have with lover.

Madonna/whore is in my opinion becoming ridiculous concept, it’s just a black and white thinking, reality is different. Of course women love sex, but they can‘t sleep with everybody either. They can’t be easy with guys they like because that decreases their value. This concept was maybe true some 20 years ago when there wasn‘t much information about relationships and dating available. It somehow assumes that woman is either pure virgin Madonna or cheap whore. Madonnas with low count are of course better fitted for relationship, I don’t know any guy who would want LTR or marry a whore. Nobody wants cheap woman for LTR who sleeps with a guy the first day either. Just think about it, do you want LTR with woman who sleeps with you right away? I would be very hesitant. What makes you think she didn’t sleep with dozens of other guys already? What makes you think she won’t be cheating on you behind you back If she is so easy?

Hence traditional women who don’t sleep around have high value, they are not pure Madonnas but they don’t necessary sleep around with bunch of guys either. They are simply using sex as leverage, as negotiation to get what they want. If you were woman you’d be doing exactly the same. And if you as a provider can also negotiate well, you have access to sex 365 days a year.

You're (maybe) unconsciously misinterpreting everything you're reading, either because you have blinders on or you're deeply emotionally invested in this topic.

For example:

Where are you getting these ideas? Nobody who posts about the Madonna/whore complex is advocating for it... And why do you assume that a "lover" can't lay the same girl repeatedly? And you can't just assume the "provider" relationship is gonna last for months or years, it could fall apart in days or weeks.

and go bang some 5-6. Not interested in 5-6, thank you though.

Wick didn't tell you to do that, you're just assuming this to be the case to preserve your idea of "my way = quality, any other way = 5-6".

You're assuming the best case of your own "side" while assuming the absolute worst case of the other "side".

Problem is, this isn't a sports match, there's nothing to attack or defend.

You need to figure out why you're so emotionally invested in this subject, and why you're so vehement in your idea before anything can get through to you.

 

[ulrich]

- Women are women, but can be divided into two groups: liberal and conservative. Liberal women have different values than conservative women

Lost me there.

You need to be aware of the simplifications you believe (and defend) not because they are right but because they reduce your mental load…

In other words, do you believe this because it is true or because you’re too lazy to accept a more nuanced truth?

Look at the answers you get from more experienced seducers here.

There’s two possible realities:

- You have a very simple truth of how women work that for some reason very experienced guys are unable to grasp.

- You have an over-simplified and incorrect vision of how women work that you’re defending out of convenience/bias despite evidence of the contrary.

You get to choose your reality.
#1 ends in frustration and lack of results
#2 starts with shame but opens an opportunity to get better

Think about it.

 

[Kaida]

I’m not an expert by any means, but neither are you. So maybe it’ll make what I’m saying more relatable.

Think about it: classical provider may wait little bit, couple weeks or months, but then he gets laid multiple times a week for months or years. This provider has more sexual encounters with one woman in one year than lover does all together with bunch of women, and virtually without any effort (other than initial waiting). Read it one more time, good provider has an access to sex easily 365 times a year without any effort. So much sex he is tired of it. Top lover can’t beat that. The woman develops way deeper connection with provider over time than she can ever have with lover.

I feel like when others say they are "very experienced," beginners may not fully understand the extent of their experience and may argue with them. It's hard to grasp the difference in skill without concrete numbers.

So let me break it down for you: most of the men giving advice here have slept with hundreds (some over 300) of women. These are not repeat encounters, by the way. Compare that to your own body count right now. They must be doing something right. Open your mind.

These men have also had deep, connected relationships with beautiful, high-quality conservative women with low body counts, even virgins if that's what you want. Most have had (or currently have) multiple relationships like this at the same time. And, they are the dominant ones in these relationships.

And these guys are not just sitting in their rooms staring at pictures of women and salivating. Many of them have successful businesses, platonic relationships, and just fun and high-status lifestyles outside of seduction.

Right now, you're like someone who has never seen or driven a car before and wants to learn how to drive. There are driving instructors right in front of you trying to give you tips, but you don't accept them.

Instead of trying to completely understand this new concept on your own, getting frustrated and making a lot of mistakes, take the tips of the experienced instructors. You'll make good progress in a short amount of time.

Even if you think there's a different way to achieve these goals, there are people right in front of you who have already done it. Accept that all your theories are just that – theories – because you don't actually have any results from them. At least nowhere near the results of these men. You'll be going in blind if you try your own untested strategy instead of following the advice of those who have already succeeded

 

[Fuck This]

You find high quality girls by banging and having relationships with tons of girls

The reason that works is when you meet a special girl, you realize that if it doesn;t work out, you can replace her in a matter of days or hours. This in turn makes you more genuine in your interaction with her, because you don't fear "scaring her off". THAT GENUINENESS is the most attractive thing about a man.

Build your life to go in the direction you want.
Be a good Friend, and the kind of person folks value as a friend
The women will come.