Is game harder than it was 10 years ago?

[climbingup]

Interesting discussion guys. I think the distinction might be simply in how much you stand out, i.e. novelty factor. That's an advantage for white guys in Asia, Africa and certain regions of Latin America, and for non-whites in Western countries like Europe.

Roosh stood out in Poland based on his Persian ethnicity and I've heard the same from other non-white friends. They had an easy time in Eastern Europe, even in places where White veterans I know didn't have it easier (Serbia, Ukraine etc.), "Hard" Eastern European countries are easy for the "Latin Lover" types because... they are a novelty there. I guess Poland isn't much easier for guys who ethnically look like they might be Polish. Teevster you probably didn't stand out as a foreigner in Poland, so no advantage. Only a disadvantage, the language barrier.

I've spent all my life traveling and living in different countries. Last count I had 23 flags so I've seen all kinds of situations and permutations. I haven't done much Eastern Europe because I hate messing with language barriers. My game is all charisma and verbals. South East Asia however is definitely way easier for Westerners, whether you use money or not - same reason mentioned above, novelty and standing out. I have dozens of lays in SEA without even buying drinks for the girls and while I wrote about this on a small closed and private forum, I didn't even call those lay reports. I just called them journal entries cause the girls were just into it and not much skill was required.

I've also spent a lot of time in Latin America... here it depends a lot on where you go. A friend of mine did an experiment in Medellin, he asked all his tinder matches if they want to come over to have sex for money, he said almost all of them said yes. So I guess guys have an easy time in Medellin in particular because there is a lot of gold digging and covert prostitution on the apps there. Girls who would fuck for money would also go on a date with a foreigner without asking for money up front, but with similar motives medium or long term. This is nothing new, I saw this going on in the 90s.

Latin America is easier if you stand out. I've seen some gringos with the blond surfer look have a downhill battle here like I did in South East Asia but for average looking white guys it's not that much easier than other countries, unless you deal with these covert prostitution situations on the apps, or in clubs and bars that are known gringo hangouts and that have gringo hunters hanging around. Culturally women are friendly up front so it may seem easier but then you have a lot of mistrust of strangers due to high crime, and a lot of catholic bullshit and LMR. For average Joe, it pretty much evens out (unless you're that blond gringo that sticks out like a sore thumb and gets a lot of novelty attraction).

I could write a book about this topic after 2 decades traveling the world but in summation I would say: if you don't use money, then the one distinction is this novelty factor and standing out from the ethnic group of the place you're in, which gets a lot of attention, curiosity and in many cases attraction. In most parts of Brazil there is so much European heritage that 100% of people I talk to assume I'm a local for example, so I don't get bonus points there even though it's not a first world country. On the other hand, Japan was piss easy for me, just ridiculous, even though it is a first world country and all those girls have money... but I was the proverbial sore thumb there too.

Thanks for this post Karea, very educational and always great to hear from someone who has traveled to lots of countries

 

[Michal]

By the way, back on the original topic of the thread... So since the introduction of tinder, the amount of men who are not having sex has more than doubled from ~12% to 28%. I think screen time in general has increased, which contributed, but mostly I'd like to ask one question:

These additional 16% of men who used to get sex but aren't anymore... are they only using the apps and otherwise being wall flowers in real life situations around girls? Did they get their self confidence crushed by the apps and hence take less initiative now?

In other words, we have data that guys are getting laid less, but has the real-world SMP actually changed, or has it only changed on tinder AND for guys who behave differently now DUE TO tinder and other screen nonsense going on?

And if the answer is the latter, could this actually be an advantage, because these 16% have been removed from our competition now? I'm not saying I know the answers to these questions, I'm just speculating but it's interesting to think about.

Good questions. I can only speak for myself and it did the opposite in a way. It made me approach more. During covid, I had absolutely no real success, just some chats, here and there. So I realized the online dating world is not an avenue I can rely on. Especially because my profile generally was not the best one. So I started to approach more after the restrictions were lifted. Online it was just a meat grinder. In the real world, my chances with the prettier girls were higher and wrnt up. And because of that I got more confident. Which leads me to question whether I really want to have that one girl and have a family one day and just settle.

I will add that the older I get the different expectations I feel from the girls imposed on me. Meaning I am expected to be professionally successful and have my shit together. Which I do, with occasional mental low points twice a year on average. At school it was different, I was learning so it was more about being cool to hang out with.
So, did the game change or did we just get older?

 

[Baron]

Interesting discussion guys. I think the distinction might be simply in how much you stand out, i.e. novelty factor. That's an advantage for white guys in Asia, Africa and certain regions of Latin America, and for non-whites in Western countries like Europe.

Roosh stood out in Poland based on his Persian ethnicity and I've heard the same from other non-white friends. They had an easy time in Eastern Europe, even in places where White veterans I know didn't have it easier (Serbia, Ukraine etc.), "Hard" Eastern European countries are easy for the "Latin Lover" types because... they are a novelty there. I guess Poland isn't much easier for guys who ethnically look like they might be Polish. Teevster you probably didn't stand out as a foreigner in Poland, so no advantage. Only a disadvantage, the language barrier.

This is a good point, it's not just about "being a westerner", definitely certain ethnicities will give you an advantage, e.g. being of a slightly darker complexion in Poland back in the day was a massive advantage, girls would stare at you all the time. Regarding the language barrier, at that time it wasn't a huge issue as you didn't really need much "verbal game", you just needed to communicate on a basic level and if that was impossible you'd use a pocket dictionary. Many girls were happy to practise their English, anyway.

Nowadays, you're totally right, the language barrier is an issue if you need to rely more on charisma and verbals, which I find is the case when you get older. I notice that when I meet an American traveller, for example, it's easier to be sexually direct without sounding crass (which can happen when you're forced to dumb down your verbals with a local girl).

So, in that sense, Teevster is right, Poland is no pussy paradise, far from in fact. But for guys with shitty verbal skills, no charisma, no charm, especially young guys of a darker complexion, it's going to be easier as they can still rely on the novelty factor to some extent. Even though the average level of English spoken in Poland has improved a lot over the past couple of decades, the locals are not native speakers and the language barrier is going to even the playing field a bit.

(Btw, knowing the local language doesn't help that much either, it's a horribly unseductive language. I guess you need a native speaker level to use it well in a seduction.)

 

[POB]

Interesting discussion guys. I think the distinction might be simply in how much you stand out, i.e. novelty factor. That's an advantage for white guys in Asia, Africa and certain regions of Latin America, and for non-whites in Western countries like Europe.

Roosh stood out in Poland based on his Persian ethnicity and I've heard the same from other non-white friends. They had an easy time in Eastern Europe, even in places where White veterans I know didn't have it easier (Serbia, Ukraine etc.), "Hard" Eastern European countries are easy for the "Latin Lover" types because... they are a novelty there. I guess Poland isn't much easier for guys who ethnically look like they might be Polish. Teevster you probably didn't stand out as a foreigner in Poland, so no advantage. Only a disadvantage, the language barrier.

I've spent all my life traveling and living in different countries. Last count I had 23 flags so I've seen all kinds of situations and permutations. I haven't done much Eastern Europe because I hate messing with language barriers. My game is all charisma and verbals. South East Asia however is definitely way easier for Westerners, whether you use money or not - same reason mentioned above, novelty and standing out. I have dozens of lays in SEA without even buying drinks for the girls and while I wrote about this on a small closed and private forum, I didn't even call those lay reports. I just called them journal entries cause the girls were just into it and not much skill was required.

I've also spent a lot of time in Latin America... here it depends a lot on where you go. A friend of mine did an experiment in Medellin, he asked all his tinder matches if they want to come over to have sex for money, he said almost all of them said yes. So I guess guys have an easy time in Medellin in particular because there is a lot of gold digging and covert prostitution on the apps there. Girls who would fuck for money would also go on a date with a foreigner without asking for money up front, but with similar motives medium or long term. This is nothing new, I saw this going on in the 90s.

Latin America is easier if you stand out. I've seen some gringos with the blond surfer look have a downhill battle here like I did in South East Asia but for average looking white guys it's not that much easier than other countries, unless you deal with these covert prostitution situations on the apps, or in clubs and bars that are known gringo hangouts and that have gringo hunters hanging around. Culturally women are friendly up front so it may seem easier but then you have a lot of mistrust of strangers due to high crime, and a lot of catholic bullshit and LMR. For average Joe, it pretty much evens out (unless you're that blond gringo that sticks out like a sore thumb and gets a lot of novelty attraction).

I could write a book about this topic after 2 decades traveling the world but in summation I would say: if you don't use money, then the one distinction is this novelty factor and standing out from the ethnic group of the place you're in, which gets a lot of attention, curiosity and in many cases attraction. In most parts of Brazil there is so much European heritage that 100% of people I talk to assume I'm a local for example, so I don't get bonus points there even though it's not a first world country. On the other hand, Japan was piss easy for me, just ridiculous, even though it is a first world country and all those girls have money... but I was the proverbial sore thumb there too.

I pretty much agree with what Karea said here.
My 2 cents:
- the combination of looks + novelty factor mean a lot more than we give credit for...sometimes they can even trump game level.
- if your look is favorable in that particular place, you gonna get action despite major holes in your game. The same can be said of the opposite: unfavorable looks may be stronger than the tightest game.
- But this is not the only factor....more traditional places, for example, require adjustments that new/intermediate guys may not be able to do. E.g. I'm tall, bulky, have dark curly hair and a mix of european/arabic look. When I went to Thailand in 2014, I had no trouble picking up foreigners; but the locals did give me some trouble (I'm not the typical good looking EE white guy they crave). When I went to Chile and Colombia, although my look is considered more "average" in those places, it still was way better/different than those from the local dudes, so I had no trouble.
- Brazil is not a place you can compare to others because there's not a defined ethnic "look" here (too much mixed races). Although blondes and white dudes tend to do good, if you go to the southern states, there's a good chance you just gonna be another joe in the crowd. But if you go up north or to rio, there will probably be a long line of brown skinned/black chicks waiting to shag you.

 

[Beck Bass]

Although blondes and white dudes tend to do good, if you go to the southern states, there's a good chance you just gonna be another joe in the crowd. But if you go up north or to rio, there will probably be a long line of brown skinned/black chicks waiting to shag you.

100%. If anything, if you have darker skin or is Asian/Indian/whatever and have tight fundametals (and game), the novelty/rarety factor is gonna be big for you, here on the south. The average dude is taller than Brazil's average and most people are "white" (or at least have lighter skin, though most people are different mixes of native "indians", Africans, Europeans and Asians, pretty much anything lol). I myself am mostly Italian descent but my greatgrampa was Japanese and part of my family German and Turkish as well.

 

[Bismarck]

Again this is viable strategies to places were the sexual market place has taking more hits, mainly some parts of usa/england/canada i actually recommend this as one of my solutions, though no practical for people that can't travel (again one of the many solutions i give in the post made about this)...

The post has gotten derrailed by the average convos that have nothing to do with the op question (average guys are beyond fucked is sad to see), no only average are beyond fucked, a lot of naturals are fucked too, all the naturals in my corner disappeared, i mean all of them... Same with a lot of the puas are gone in my corner.... They pretty much gave up. I think pua forums can be a representation such as economic indicators for the economy, you may be able to use for example this forum or the mainstream seduction as indicator of the seduction players society in general, you can not compare this patheticness to back in the days, i don't know why we need to be in denial is silly. Have you seen our lay report section just lol...

I think as tribal elders we have a responsibility to be a bit more practical this tony robbins shit: be masculine, we are not average, and all this feel good keywords... Is not practical is embarrassing is the new be confident bro! Not talking about you (cause your shit is super practical), but to the tribals elders in general, lets be more mindful.

A member of this forum, who is still quite young and so without that many lays under his belt, traveled to a major city in the US recently and in the space of little more than a week, using the best tech available (real tech - Gun/Bacc, etc.) got 3 lays, all with tasty twat.

(Hot) American chicks are actually awesome, which calls into question much of this doom and gloom bs one sees pasted on the boards day in day out. Guys complaining probably have other issues (autism, etc.) they need to fix, as opposed to the "market" being rotten and it being necessary to travel to EE/Thailand/Brazil to get pussy.

 

[Skills]

I will agree with this an is one of my recommendations, on the solutions to deal with this market place, but is not automatic if you are average you may still encounter issues... finally does not have to be out of country, you can go for a second or 3 tier city...

Some of the advantage is when you are new to a country your pick up exitment and motivation will go up..

New women to you will be more attractive due to novelty...

You can be viewed as new shinny object dtf...as a matter of fact women respond well to dudes new to town or out relationships.

You get the it does not count vegas dynamic, foreign going back does not count in womaneze...

White guy specially blonde in some patrs of asia and latin america more desirable..

Women may see foreign as a way out to 3rd world. Not ideal for raw sexual desire but you can bait and switch


Personally i am not impress with white men gaming in favorable market places... but that is me...

@Skjöldr recently went to poland and rack up lay count as example there is definetly an advantage...

Now if you paying for vagina of course disgrace

@Bismarck ^ read the above, also what does a dude coming to usa and getting laid 3 times in a week corraltes to doom and gloom and the game being harder now a days than 10 years ago and my point that if you have good fundamentals and game is actually easier, but if you dont you are fucked and as one of the many strategies as explained in multiple paragraphs specially read karea response is to travel.... we have multiple guys doing 3 times a week or more consistantly in usa one is @TomInHo

 

[Gunwitch]

@Bismarck ^ read the above, also what does a dude coming to usa and getting laid 3 times in a week corraltes to doom and gloom [/USER]

He said "calls into question" not correlates.

To the actual topic, the game is easier than 10 years ago because there is more advanced tech now. I can't speak to a guy just entering the community and starting out though. Some guys pick it up in weeks, some guys languish for months because they won't listen and do what they're told/instructed. I've had students who have been doing sidewalk game asking for directions for a year, finally break and use some curiosity openers on stationary targets, results go up ten fold in a month.

Goes back to ego, a guy thinks he's smarter than everyone and won't listen, does it his own way, he's gonna have a longer process to learn of course. That's any time post hell 2000ish when tech started becoming available for masses. Women aren't quite as uptight about one night stands since maybe 2010ish, so little bit easier in USA at least.

Fairly irrelevant thought exercise though, I mean we aren't building any time machines on this forum , gotta work within this framework, with these women, these social conditionings.


Gun

 

[Regal Tiger]

As a lurker who can't honestly put forward a real opinion on this specific topic, I can't help but say I'm thoroughly enjoying this thread. Thank you

 

[Karea Ricardus D.]

So I started to approach more after the restrictions were lifted. Online it was just a meat grinder. In the real world, my chances with the prettier girls were higher and wrnt up. And because of that I got more confident.

Pretty interesting case study, pointing towards the SMP only being harder for guys who are stuck on the apps and (at least based on your experience) easier for guys not stuck on the apps... hmmm.

Which leads me to question whether I really want to have that one girl and have a family one day and just settle.

Sinn quoted a study on his blog way back when that said something like... people in a relationship are happier than people who are single, except for singles who get at least one new partner per week.

So seems like the 1 lay/week is the tipping point where it starts to be more fulfilling to be single than to be committed. And at that point, priorities and goals change.

Ironically, that would be the best time to get into a relationship (if you do want one long-term) because you'll have the most options, the most power in the relationship and it'll be set up in the best possible frame.

 

[ulrich]

Sinn quoted a study on his blog way back when that said something like... people in a relationship are happier than people who are single, except for singles who get at least one new partner per week.

So seems like the 1 lay/week is the tipping point where it starts to be more fulfilling to be single than to be committed. And at that point, priorities and goals change.

Ironically, that would be the best time to get into a relationship (if you do want one long-term) because you'll have the most options, the most power in the relationship and it'll be set up in the best possible frame.

Agreed to that.

When I was younger, I used to despise being single… at times I felt like I was low status and other times I felt like women did not appreciate me.
That went on for years.

By the time I became proficient in seduction, I started loving it.

It boils down to wether you are confident that you can get quality pussy or not.

Once you get to the point that you KNOW WITHOUT A DOUBT that you can get hot women, your outlook changes dramatically.

 

[Karea Ricardus D.]

When I was younger, I used to despise being single… at times I felt like I was low status and other times I felt like women did not appreciate me.
That went on for years.

By the time I became proficient in seduction, I started loving it.

Haa... dude, I once got a GF after "being single and loving it" for 5 years straight... and I actually felt like "my girl-friend" are the most beta words to ever come out of a man's mouth. Just felt so wrong. What you mean, you let yourself get caught?

Right now I wouldn't mind having one! But I also know that'll change again as momentum picks up and I get the ball rolling. Always the same story, seen it so many times back and forth.

The one caveat is personally I aim to pull the rip chord before age 50 cause after that it does seem to get a fair bit harder... at least if you want the cuties in their 20s. Or play on with the 30+ ladies I guess... but priorities shift too at some point. I know only a handful of PUAs still going after 50.

 

[Bismarck]

I've had students who have been doing sidewalk game asking for directions for a year, finally break and use some curiosity openers on stationary targets, results go up ten fold in a month.

Actually, your curiosity tech also works on day game moving sets. The guy I'm referring to went after chicks (even ran after them) in the Torero London Day Game model way, but using sophisticated hand gestures from Bacc to stop them, followed by verbals extracted from your magick potions.

I've just depleted my resources, so will be adopting a disciplined regimen of applying the lore regularly on the hottest baes I see auf der strasse, practicing this like a sport until it clicks. With a bit of advanced tech, I can probably start reaching for the stars.

 

[Warped Mindless]

Actually, your curiosity tech also works on day game moving sets. The guy I'm referring to went after chicks (even ran after them) in the Torero London Day Game model way, but using sophisticated hand gestures from Bacc to stop them, followed by verbals extracted from your magick potions.

I've just depleted my resources, so will be adopting a disciplined regimen of applying the lore regularly on the hottest baes I see auf der strasse, practicing this like a sport until it clicks. With a bit of advanced tech, I can probably start reaching for the stars.

Bacchus hand gestures?

The search in GC isn’t working for me for some reason. You have a link or remember the name of the articles or resources? Would be interested in reading about that.

 

[Beck Bass]

make sure that one arm is partially stretched out towards the girl's solar plexus. Slowly and deliberately bring this arm downwards before you finish your opener. Be assertive. . . but do not fully extend your elbow or grope at her.

Can you give us some drawing/picture of what this looks like? I'm trying to picture it but I'm having trouble

 

[juandon]

I think a HUGE part of men not having sex as much anymore is the dominance of cell phones, internet, and computers.

It has changed the dynamics for both men and women:

- For men, it's given the average man a very easy "out" to sexual frustration through the form of pornography. Rather than work to seduce women, he can fire up a video, a game, or a VR scene of his favorite sexual fantasy and just skip right to pleasure with minimal effort or expenditure. Why spend time going out and talking to women and risk getting shot down if you can just spend a few minutes on your computer, or VR device, or cellphone and get your rocks off easily that way? Additionally, the majority of men who are not high-value to women will find the distractions of video gaming and pornography far more appealing than facing the harsh reality of their value and status not being able to bring in the women they crave. This is not helped by media, both online and traditional, pedestalizing the most beautiful women, desensitizing the average man to the average woman, who in times past, before the Internet and Television, would be more than happy to accept an average woman as a partner, but is now influenced by media into thinking that he needs, and deserves, the most high-value, beautiful, youthful woman.

- For women, it's basically inflated their value and self-worth to stratospheric levels due to constant barrage of validation they receive from posting pictures on Instagram and Facebook and other social media. Women thrive on attention and these social media platforms give them copious amounts of it. Before the Internet, they had to actually go out and dress up and walk around and flirt with men to get this attention, and in a given year the average women might get a handful of men, either in her school, or work environment, or sometimes in the street, to give them the attention they crave. Now all they have to do is post a provocative picture online and sit back in their pajamas and watch the thirsty comments come rolling in. This reduces their desire to engage in actual socialization with the average man in real life, and when they do want actual sex or a relationship, and not just validation, they will narrow their focus to only a select few high-value men.

 

[Gunwitch]

I think a HUGE part of men not having sex as much anymore is the dominance of cell phones, internet, and computers.

It has changed the dynamics for both men and women:

- For men, it's given the average man a very easy "out" to sexual frustration through the form of pornography.

That's the name of the game man. I've been talking nofap (well like once a week) for 2 decades. Easy cure on our end as men.

- For women, it's basically inflated their value and self-worth to stratospheric levels due to constant barrage of validation they receive from posting pictures on Instagram and Facebook and other social media.

That's all academic too, still when she meets you in person and you give her an intense experience it outweighs simple ego validation. They'll still be aroused and infatuated and shit. Again easy fix on our end.

Gun

 

[Michal]

I think a HUGE part of men not having sex as much anymore is the dominance of cell phones, internet, and computers.

It has changed the dynamics for both men and women:

- For men, it's given the average man a very easy "out" to sexual frustration through the form of pornography. Rather than work to seduce women, he can fire up a video, a game, or a VR scene of his favorite sexual fantasy and just skip right to pleasure with minimal effort or expenditure. Why spend time going out and talking to women and risk getting shot down if you can just spend a few minutes on your computer, or VR device, or cellphone and get your rocks off easily that way? Additionally, the majority of men who are not high-value to women will find the distractions of video gaming and pornography far more appealing than facing the harsh reality of their value and status not being able to bring in the women they crave. This is not helped by media, both online and traditional, pedestalizing the most beautiful women, desensitizing the average man to the average woman, who in times past, before the Internet and Television, would be more than happy to accept an average woman as a partner, but is now influenced by media into thinking that he needs, and deserves, the most high-value, beautiful, youthful woman.

- For women, it's basically inflated their value and self-worth to stratospheric levels due to constant barrage of validation they receive from posting pictures on Instagram and Facebook and other social media. Women thrive on attention and these social media platforms give them copious amounts of it. Before the Internet, they had to actually go out and dress up and walk around and flirt with men to get this attention, and in a given year the average women might get a handful of men, either in her school, or work environment, or sometimes in the street, to give them the attention they crave. Now all they have to do is post a provocative picture online and sit back in their pajamas and watch the thirsty comments come rolling in. This reduces their desire to engage in actual socialization with the average man in real life, and when they do want actual sex or a relationship, and not just validation, they will narrow their focus to only a select few high-value men.

What comes to mind regarding this is that the traditional gender roles which were relevant 40 years ago are now mostly gone. Women do not have to rely on men as much as in the past. The value an average man provides to a woman's life has gone down.
There is an argument that women hypergamous which in my experience, from seeing how friends, coworkers, family members, friends of all these groups, picked their partners... generally it is the case they are in a very similar and close social standings. Often the man makes more money. Sometines the girl may be quite dominant herself and is with a guy who is not so dominant. But he makes it up with his leadership skills and taking charge or at least charting the course. He may have a fuckboy past so he is well equiped for handling her, even though he is not so dominant. I do not see that many cases where the man is a leagues above the girl.

So what is left for a man to provide to a woman?

There are traits like leadership. Something most women are pretty shit at and still rely on men to do. Vast majority of women want men to take care of things. I see this even in the smallest of things like when I go with girls to places, or I enter a train waggon, even if they are closer to the enterance, they slow down and let me go first. They don't want to deal with picking the spot. Also, you cannot lead very well if you do not have the experience, hence why a lot of dudes struggle. For me personally, this is one of the biggest things I still need to work on even though I am miles ahead than where I was years ago.

Next that I can see is "an experience". When I was going for oure coffee dates as this site suggested it did not work for me in 40% of the cases. When I paired it with walking through the city later, my chances went up.
Overall, I think there is some truth to one saying which is like "women catch men with their looks, men catch women with their lifestyle". Women want to feel and if a man provides a great experience for a girl, he has much higher chances with her. I saw some short clip of some guy talking about how he would seduce Kim Kardashian, and he basically said he would take her and go clean his car with her from mud, or something like that. Build a closet from ikea. He was making fun of a hypothetical guy taking her to a restaurant where she knows the owner or even has been many times.
But having and providing unique experiences is much harder nowadays I think. But then again, the experience is quite different depending on who you are with.

Great sex - I think generally they cannot get the same pleasure just from dildos. And if more guys are having less sex then they will be less experienced, less skilled, etc.

Sense of humor - from my experience, most women are not that funny. If you want to get that abs workout or almost pee yourself from the laughter, it is most definitely gonna be a guy who tells the joke. This plays into that unique experience.

There is probably more. But what I wanted to illustrate is that if an average guy needs to be above average, many dudes will do what you highlighted instead.

 

[Warped Mindless]

What comes to mind regarding this is that the traditional gender roles which were relevant 40 years ago are now mostly gone. Women do not have to rely on men as much as in the past. The value an average man provides to a woman's life has gone down.
There is an argument that women hypergamous which in my experience, from seeing how friends, coworkers, family members, friends of all these groups, picked their partners... generally it is the case they are in a very similar and close social standings. Often the man makes more money. Sometines the girl may be quite dominant herself and is with a guy who is not so dominant. But he makes it up with his leadership skills and taking charge or at least charting the course. He may have a fuckboy past so he is well equiped for handling her, even though he is not so dominant. I do not see that many cases where the man is a leagues above the girl.

So what is left for a man to provide to a woman?

There are traits like leadership. Something most women are pretty shit at and still rely on men to do. Vast majority of women want men to take care of things. I see this even in the smallest of things like when I go with girls to places, or I enter a train waggon, even if they are closer to the enterance, they slow down and let me go first. They don't want to deal with picking the spot. Also, you cannot lead very well if you do not have the experience, hence why a lot of dudes struggle. For me personally, this is one of the biggest things I still need to work on even though I am miles ahead than where I was years ago.

Next that I can see is "an experience". When I was going for oure coffee dates as this site suggested it did not work for me in 40% of the cases. When I paired it with walking through the city later, my chances went up.
Overall, I think there is some truth to one saying which is like "women catch men with their looks, men catch women with their lifestyle". Women want to feel and if a man provides a great experience for a girl, he has much higher chances with her. I saw some short clip of some guy talking about how he would seduce Kim Kardashian, and he basically said he would take her and go clean his car with her from mud, or something like that. Build a closet from ikea. He was making fun of a hypothetical guy taking her to a restaurant where she knows the owner or even has been many times.
But having and providing unique experiences is much harder nowadays I think. But then again, the experience is quite different depending on who you are with.

Great sex - I think generally they cannot get the same pleasure just from dildos. And if more guys are having less sex then they will be less experienced, less skilled, etc.

Sense of humor - from my experience, most women are not that funny. If you want to get that abs workout or almost pee yourself from the laughter, it is most definitely gonna be a guy who tells the joke. This plays into that unique experience.

There is probably more. But what I wanted to illustrate is that if an average guy needs to be above average, many dudes will do what you highlighted instead.

Your whole mindset is fucked up. All this talk about what you provide to her… what about what she provides to you?

Wanna know what so many men have so much trouble getting laid? Because they are to busy trying to figure out how to prove themselves to women. What do you offer her? Your self! If yourself is lame then go fix that.
Stop trying to impress women, go see if they impress you.

 

[Beck Bass]

The value an average man provides to a woman's life has gone down.

I mean, not really, it's only in terms of money, anyway. And there were always providers and players, trust me, people are people, after all. So it wasn't that uncommon for a woman to marry a guy for financial security back in the day, and some day she leaves with her lover, or worse, the guy raises some other dude's kid (I mean, it can be good for the kid, but I suppose most men wouldn't find it too enticing).

Women also provide less value nowadays, if that's the mindset. Back in the day women were supposed to have a whole skillset dedicated to being good housewives and entertaining men in general (think about all the stuff geishas in Japan learn, or other artistic stuff women learned to please men, like piano, dance, whatever). Nowadays it's rare to find a girl that can cook for shit, not to mention being able to clean a house properly.
So where's the "power inbalance", really?

Of course the times are different, women have more financial independence and get a lot of attention online, but women still women, and men men. That part about the experience you talk about is very real, most girls have really boring lifes and want a men to help them take charge, to lead them towards a better, more fulfilling life (even if most women won't admit this). Leading is an essencial skill to get women, but this is nothing new, it always was that way.