Nueva década, nueva vida

[Científico]

I have decided to start a new journal today – just to turn over a new leaf in 2020, and recognize that the four year relationship I ended in 2018 is less of an influencing factor these days in my life overall. The journal needs a new title to reflect this.

The new title is Spanish for “new decade, new life”. It comes from the conversation over whatsapp I’ve been having with the Colombian girl that I approached last year, in my first ever approach and instant-date in Boston almost exactly one year ago. A bit cheesy I know, but I found what she said apt for the title of this journal, especially coming from her. That experience convinced me of the power of cold approach pick-up.

There are some things I will do differently going forward

Immediate changes for 2020:

• No more cannabis until I meet certain professional and personal goals (Professional, meeting KPIs and goals at my company, personal being, more consistent success with women, and at least 1-2 new lays under my belt).

• One cold approach per day. Bare minimum. Ideally three per session. Make cold approaching normal and part of my routine. It doesn’t take long and can be part of everyday errands. My main obstacle is getting over the rustiness and return of AA – making approaching “normal” everyday will help destroy this obstacle.

• Regular fitness routine – work out at least every other day. Cycle between cardio and lifting weights. There is no doubt this helps my mental clarity and health.

• No more drinking when out dancing socially. I have observed the nights when I do not drink, I have more energy, more mental clarity, sharper wit, more assertiveness and able to make quicker decisions. This is especially important now that I am aiming for faster pulls. The further benefits for my wallet and for my health make this a no brainer. The only time I will allow myself to drink is when on a date with a cute woman that is also drinking.

Longer term goals for 2020:

• Work on my investments. Put money in low-cost index funds and think about building wealth in the long term.

• Joining a dance performance team. This would leverage the experience I already have with dancing to be a more high-value guy in that community, thus easier access to more social circles and women. This takes some commitment and practice however, so I need to get more established at my new job before embarking on this. Targeting second half of 2020.

• Plan a trip to South America, for daygame, and to follow up with a few leads I have down there. Second half of 2020.

• Work on my social media presence with some select photos and posts to better communicate high value, both to women and business connections.

• Continuing my language learning progress. Solidify German conversational skills I already have, continue studying Russian. Turn Russian studying in a consistent weekly routine.

Looking forward to a remarkable and prosperous 2020.

 

[Científico]

The party was good last night. However, this Vietnamese woman I met a few days prior and took home got clingy - she didn't like seeing me leading women from one place to another. I had to tell her that she is looking for a level of commitment I cannot offer her right now.

Tried some fast pulls last night, with one standing out in my mind as well executed but with resistance from the girl, although she was interested in me for sure. A lot of this is just picking the right target - a girl that is DTF that night from the way she is dancing and interacting. The vietnamese woman messed with my vibe a bit and I let a potential fast-lay opportunity slip away, unfortunately.

However, plenty of leads from this party to follow up with now in January.

Today, the first day of 2020, I also met my approaching goal and did three approaches. Two blowouts, followed by a very pleasant interaction with a young, cute Jamaican girl that gave me an IOI before I approached. There was definately a sexual vibe to this interaction - I did the so-called "Maradona move", in which after introducing myself and shaking hands, I simply held on to her hand - and she didnt pull away for a solid 20-30 seconds. She is going back to NYC tomorrow, and unfortunately we could not schedule a date for today. It's fine since I have things to do. A person to follow up if I ever make it up there.

 

[Científico]

Didn't take long for me to break my "one approach per day" goal. The problem is, there really are some days that approaching is not possible - like when I am in Florida all week with my company going to meetings, dinners, and socials.

It's clear to me that stabilizing my career has to come first right now. Women are a secondary priority.

My biggest problem right now is lack of intrinsic motivation. Some moments I feel like I am in a complete rut. Constantly tired, and low motivation to do many tasks, not just approaching women. Besides laying off drugs and alcohol for a while, I might have to curb my masturbation habits as well - despite having tried and failed many times.

I'm still getting dates here and there, especially from women I meet at dancing events who are there to meet men, and Im always high value at these events since I dance well. I had an indian girl I met at salsa just agree to a date with me.

The vietnamese woman I met at the NYE festivities is also around - she wants to hang, despite me telling her I can't give her the commitment she wants. She then says she wants to be friends. I tell her "men and women cannot be friends" and kiss her. She likes it and kisses back. Then she asks for commitment and I tell her no. The constant cycle.

If only I could supplement these dancing girls with women from cold approach consistently, then I would have more numbers than I know what to do with.

 

[Científico]

Last week was absolutely crazy work-wise. But so far so good. We are getting sales, and looks like I'll be making more money in Q1 this year.

Like I said last post, it's clear that women are a secondary priority right now. I have a few other things going on the first half of 2020 that need to be taken care of first. First and foremost getting my financial house in order and making sure I am hitting key goals at work.

However, I thought I would take some time with this post to discuss the data from 2019 - I kept a pretty good record of most of key interactions with women starting in March of 2019 and onwards, and its clear to me that my biggest problem is CLOSING during dates. The rest of the pipeline seems actually okay for the most part. I'll discuss why below.

I met women in 2019 three ways principally:
1.) Daygame
2.) Meetups (defined as any event with a common interest, social circle or business, or a happy hour - not necessarily from meetup.com)
3.) Dancing events

There was no online dating here. I dont use it much. Though I might dabble in it more in 2020 later on when I have time, since I know it has some potential as a supplement.

The last ten months of 2019, I got 183 phone numbers from all three sources. This is a little over 18 per month, which isn't bad at all. More dedicated daygame sessions would increase this (WHEN I have time), as well as going out to more events - I am working on ways to increase my energy day to day so I'm able to be out in the field more often and get more leads.

Out of 183, 89 responded to the ice-breaker text and we initiated some kind of conversation. This is about 48.6%, or about half. Ive seen a girlschase post in which this is roughly the norm, so no big problems here. I don't always follow up when the girl doesn't respond when my interest is only lukewarm, especially lately with all the other stuff in my life. More consistent follow ups with another re-engage text or phone calls could increase this.

Out of 183, I scheduled a date with 26. About 14.2% of total numbers. Or taken another way, roughly 30% of the girls that I conversed with in some manner after getting their contact info. Looking at the post above this isn't terrible either but I think has room for improvement. Better text game and overall fundamentals as well as a refinement of where I get my numbers could improve this - hope to get this up to 20% this year.

Out of 183, I went on dates with 19. A little over 10% of the total, and a "flake rate" of a little over 25%. Not awful. Perhaps better text game and fundamentals could improve this too.

Here comes the big problem: Out of the 19 girls I went on dates with, I successfully escalated all the way to sex with only 1. Thus my closing rate is horrendous 5.2%. This is clearly the biggest problem in my game right now. Curiously though, I would say over 50% ended up back at my apartment and I kissed (I will keep track of this in 2020). So I'm getting bouncebacks. The girls are just not fucking.

I have some ideas for how to improve this awful close rate:
1.) No kissing at all until back at my apartment. Instead use more sexual tension, like hand holding.
2.) Incorporate more sex talk into my dates.
3.) Move to a different apartment (in the works for March - it might be that my apartment is just too high end, but I don't have much evidence for this yet)

I welcome more feedback on this if anyone is reading.

One final note: Out of all three methods I discussed above, "meetups" seems to be the most effective. It was also the smallest part of my funnel. I got 23 numbers from meetups. 15 (65.2%) responded and had a conversation with me. 7 (30%, or almost half of the ones that responded) set up dates and 6 went out on actual dates. My one lay also came from this group! So a low flake rate, much higher overall conversion rate. It might be that need to stop going out dancing so much (to a community that might be more saturated since I know a lot of people) and start going to other kinds of events to meet women.

 

[Científico]

Copied Field Report --------

Hey all,

Decided to post this one for analysis. Anyone that knows me has read my journal knows I have little trouble getting dates various ways – its actually closing and getting sex from these dates that is my problem. This is another curious instance that follows the same pattern.

I met this woman at a professional networking event last week. I was making my rounds and talking to everyone, young and old, men and women. I end up approaching a group of young looking students – one of these is a big-eyed short Latina woman that oogles me with very strong eye contact and takes immediate interest. I have a brief chat with her and we speak about her professional background, but then I get distracted by another woman approaching me (who I was also attracted to and end up number closing, hope to get her out on a date at some point) so I lose track of her.

I catch up with her later when I go back to her corner of the room and she is still there with a group of students. She throws me an IOI by looking in my direction immediately – not directly at me, but turning her head enough for me to know that she is taking notice of me. I approach and she is happy to chat. Turns out these “friends” of hers weren’t really that close friends after all – they leave, leaving me isolated with her in the corner of the room.

What follows is a lot of deep diving. We switch to Spanish once I realize she is from Colombia and she travelled to the USA 10 years ago by herself on an exchange program and ended up staying. She also reveals she is married to an American guy (!). I’m not throwing in any specific dialogue here since I honestly don’t remember, but we talk about dance, her travels, her professional path and what she likes to do for fun.

During the conversation there is a lot of light touch initiated by her and eye contact. I ask her out for a drink and she says sure. Gives me her number without hesitation. I then excuse myself and she leaves.

Actually at this point I was thinking maybe I should have escalated more and lead her to a different bar. It’s always a constant question in my head, thinking about how fast to escalate in different situations.

I text her an icebreaker text that evening (last Wednesday) and she responds the next day warmly. Then I ask her out on Saturday, asking her for her schedule, and she responds telling me Thursday of the following week works for her. I tell her this is fine for me.

On Tuesday she initiates and asks me what I have in mind for Thursday. I tell her a wine bar in my town and we set up the time.

Thursday comes around (tonight) and I’m running late at work. We have the following exchange (posted in original Spanish, with English translation in parenthesis)

Científico: Problablemente llegaré tarde, lo siento. (I will problably be late, Im sorry)
Científico: Te aviso cuando salgo de aquí – terminando una demonstración (I will let you know when I get out of here – finishing a demo).
Colombiana: Ok vale (thumbs up).
Científico: Ya saliendo (Leaving now)
Científico: Nos vemos 6:10 o 6:15 (See you 6:10 or 6:15)
Colombiana: Yo voy saliendo también (I’m leaving now too)
Colombiana: Llego a la misma hora (I’ll get there at the same time)

All normal, right? Then I get this text in English from her:

Colombiana: Love I’m going to yudo tonight. At what time do you get off work?

At this point I’m laughing my ass off. Clearly this is the text she meant to send to her husband. I almost wished she had not sent it though because in my mind it would draw attention to the fact that is doing something illicit by going on the date with me, letting me know she is lying to her husband.

She then says

Colombiana: lol ese era para otro jajaja yes estoy aquí (lol that was for someone else hahaha yes I am here)

I decide to proceed as normal and ignore the text. My plan was to do the standard two-venue set-up in my local neighborhood followed by the bounce back home.

First venue is a brewpub – we get beers and appetizers and sit across from each other. She is a talker and has no problem opening up to me about her past, languages, travel, etc. There were a few moments where I spiked things up – asking her about her secret addiction, what kind of guys she likes, where she immediately answers “Australians” (referring to a previous part of the conversation) and then asks me what kind of women I like, to which I answer “Adventurous and spontaneous” (matching her and referring to a conversation we had previously) but then throwing in “tall blonde and slavic” (clearly not her). She accuses me of learning Russian just for the women and then I deflect.

Before my planned move to the second venue, I excuse myself to go to the bathroom. I come back to see her looking at her phone laughing – then she shows me a joke on her phone that “someone sent to her” that makes me think for sure “I’m going to get laid tonight”.

I don’t remember exactly, but it was something in Spanish like “I talk to my husband after making love – by calling him afterwards”. I ask her “when was the last time you made love like that” and she laughs hard, looks at me and says “Im not telling you”.

Here is when I think now I should have taken her to my place right then and there. That really should have been my cue, and in retrospect it seems ridiculous that I waited. What she showed me on the phone should have sealed the deal in my mind and I should have reacted better to that situation. But in my mind I’m thinking I still have to do the second venue, sit next to her and escalate physically before moving to that step. So I take her to a nearby (5 min walk) dimly lit lounge bar and order another round of drinks, this time wine.

We sit next to each other and I gradually spike things up, taking her hand at times (she accepts this escalation, but I sense about maybe 25% hesitation on her part and a slight tendency to pull back). The exact moment when I do this we are talking about cannabis, and she says

Colombiana: I really don’t like to alter my mental state with any substances
Científico: Cariño, I have bad news for you
Colombiana: What?
Científico: taking her hand you are altering your mental state right now with the wine and with me
Colombiana: I guess that’s true

At another point 5-10 minutes after that I show her some videos on my phone and pull her in close, another physical spike. However I also try to fractionate and not always be close, pulling away at times during the conversation.

I finish my drink and decide its time for the bounceback home. I tell her we are going somewhere “to listen to music” of artists we had been talking about, and to “dance”, without specifying exactly where. She says okay. I take her hand and she holds it for a bit on the street while we are walking, but then pulls away to put gloves on.

Here is when some resistance starts to manifest itself. She says she has to go soon. I tell her she can’t stay very long anyway (false time constraint). She asks me where we are going. I say “Disneyland”. She asks me if I saw the text she sent. I say “what text?”. She says “good”.

We go up to my apartment, making small talk along the way. Knowing that she is under a real time constraint with her husband, as soon as my apartment door closes I go in for the kiss. Perhaps uncalibrated. She pulls away and says “what are you doing, I should really go” and starts pressing me again on if I saw the text. I deflect again. She says “look at your phone”. I say “okay, yes I saw it”. She then lets me know that yudo class was over 25 minutes ago and she should head back. Then she says “you should put on some of that music real quick” and I say “If there is no time, there is no time”.

At this point it dawns on me that I problably didn’t move fast enough. We talk about a few other things right inside my door, before I pull in close again, move inches from her face and manhandle kiss her – there is some resistance but it is weak, token resistance, and she kisses me back. I ask her “why did you go out with me tonight” and she says “I don’t know – networking ”.

Then she then gets a text from her husband, and it’s clear at this point she won’t let me proceed. She says “I really have to go – he gets jealous”.

I walk her back to her car, making more small talk. We make some vague plans to do this again and she seems interested, but time will tell. Unlike some of the other girls I go on first dates with, I am in fact very interested in taking this one out again. I do not kiss her again.

Plan to proceed with this one is to text tomorrow regarding something work-related we talked about in the second venue – her response will be a strong indicator if she is down to meet again. Then I might ask her to come here directly.

But, this seems like it follows my usual pattern. I get dates. I get the kiss. I get the bounceback to my apartment. But I don’t get laid. In this case, probably because I failed to react to this situation of going out with a married woman under an actual time constraint and not moving fast enough. My mind still struggles with "how fast is too fast" constantly. I have to say this is the first time I have gone out with a woman like this so I am cutting myself some slack. I'll see if I can get her out again.

 

[Científico]

Things are going quite well right now. Work is great and although busy things are progressing quite nicely. Really can't complain.

On the woman front, I've been averaging about one date a week since I got back from my trip to Florida first week of January (2 dates this month so far). Got 2 more scheduled, both leads from dancing.

I have no problem getting leads from dancing, and meetups (to a lesser extent since I go to less events). What I would like to do is supplement this with more leads from cold approach/daygame. This requires the most discipline and is the hardest to get a consistent flow. The problem is that the "I'll just approach whenever I see a cute woman during my day to day errands" simply doesn't work very well. The mind comes up with all kinds of excuses not to approach, including "I can't waste time talking to a woman when I have xyz to do" along with the usual "she isn't that hot anyway", "it's cold", blah blah blah. So silly considering I know that when you just grab your balls and approach it WILL often work.

The solution is to get back into a routine of going out JUST for daygame and approaching women. Then there are no excuses and I force myself to do it. Lately I have had very little time for this. However since it appears I have decided where to move to, and have taken care of many other priorities I had on my list, I may have more time to get this done starting this weekend.

 

[Científico]

Had a great night last night, first at a happy hour and then dancing. Got 6 numbers total, 4 have responded (thus far). It's tragic that the one I like the most (a sexy, multilingual colombian girl) is among those that haven't responded yet. But as we all know, a response isn't necessarily required for an icebreaker text.

Today got out one cold approach at a lunch line. This woman gets in line behind me, and I notice just how cute she is - she looks vaguely latina. I hesitate and dont open right away. Start to order my lunch in Spanish (since everyone that works at this place is either from Honduras or El Salvador). I notice she starts to order in English, so I open about her being latina and me expecting her to order in Spanish. She is receptive and attentive - doesn't have this "distracted" vibe that I sometimes see with women that are uninterested in talking. But there isn't any hook. I make more small chat about her being vegeterian since she is only ordering falafel and vegetables.

Then, close to the cashier, I go in for the kill with my usual line:

Científico: So I just have one question
Her: Whats that?
Científico: Are you a beer girl or a wine girl
Her: Neither
Científico: Oooo, nobody's perfect. How about tea or coffee?
Her: Yes sometimes
Científico: *look her straight in the eye* how about I get your number, I send you a message, and we'll get tea or coffee one of these days

One of the beautiful things about delivering this confidently, is that the women often experience a surge of "wow, this guy has balls". I saw it in her face, the way she looked at me in the eye and leaned in after I said this. Alas, she says "I just started dating someone". I respond with the usual "I don't want to be your boyfriend, I have a very rigorous application process for that".

The cashier says non-chalantly "Are you together?"
I say: "no, but she wants to be"
She laughs - but is persistent in her refusal and I don't push too much.

Thus, no number here, but the approach felt good.

 

[Científico]

Copied Field Report-----

I’m trying to get into the habit of posting all of my dates now for feedback. As anyone who has read my journal knows, my main problem is overcoming LMR, and although I get many dates I have a very poor lay/date ratio.

This was a lead I got from dancing last Saturday. I went to one of my typical Salsa/Bachata venues where there are lots of good dancers, and lots of women. I was having a good night and meeting many new women, as is typical whenever I go out to these events.

At this event I notice a full-figured, big-breasted woman who appears to be alone making her way around the two dance floors. Estimating late-30’s. We do not run into each other right away as I’m dancing/interacting with other ladies. Eventually I catch up to her in the bachata room.

I ask her to dance and she says yes, but tells me “I do not do sensual stuff”. I don’t remember my exact response to her, but it was something along the lines of “it’s okay I’ll go easy on you” (as in, not taking her seriously). When we dance I still lead some sensual moves and she actually does a decent job following, meaning what she said was BS. The entire time she is laughing, enjoying herself, and the vibe is immediately sexy with strong eye contact.

After this dance we converse a bit. Unfortunately, I don’t remember the exact dialogue, but it ends with my typical “are you a beer girl or a wine girl” and the number request. She actually refuses this request at first, and deflects with “why do you want my number, what are you going to do with it?”. Again, I don’t remember my response, probably some BS like “I’ll only call you 18 times a day” or “I’ll take you to church”.

It wasn’t a hard rejection, just token resistance, which is the theme here with this woman in particular even more than others. I decide to lead her to the salsa room and she complies. We dance again. Again, really fun, she laughs, enjoys herself, makes strong sexy eye contact. More conversation afterwards that I don’t exactly remember, just some background info about herself, then we go back to the bachata room, and this time when I ask for the number again she gives it to me.

We part after that and I don’t see her again the rest of the night.

I send her an icebreaker text the next day and she responds in about 3 hours. Even though she is salvadoreña she prefers English:

Científico: Hola, nice dancing last night
Sexy Salvadoreña (SS): Hola, happy Sunday! Thanks for the dance and adjusting to the non body roll disclaimer . -SS
Científico: I did try, but are certainly able to do body rolls. I saw the evidence
SS: laugh/cry emoji. Well, you gently eased me into it. Didn’t see it coming. Good job!
Científico: Gracias, I can have that effect
Científico: Let me know what your schedule is like this week for that vinito we discussed.
SS: Where do you work? (getting info about logistics)
Científico: answers question, you?
SS: *Gives information about where she lives works*
SS: This week Thu and Fri look good wine emoji
Científico: Let’s shoot for Friday. ok-sign emoji
SS: Cool

At this point the conversation dies, and the date is still 5 days away. I consider sending some kind of pinging text during the week before the date but decide against it – if she is interested she will show up.

Friday rolls around and I text her in the morning a proposed time and place. She responds quickly and confirms. So everything is okay.

The plan is my standard two-venue date + the bounceback to my place, both venues within walking distance of my apartment building. It has become my go-to format for attempted first date seductions.

I’m running late from work (as usual) in the evening, but since the place is a 5 minute walk from my apartment I am only about 10 minutes late. She shows up minutes after me.

Venue one is a wine bar with a chill vibe and live music. She shows up looking great, and better than the night I met her. She had curled her hair, put on make-up and bright red lipstick, had a top on with leopard pattern and a mesh in front of her chest that showed off her breasts (but not in an obvious way), and black jeans. We sit at the corner of the bar where there was room, not side-sitting exactly but perpendicular to each other.

Conversation flows nicely. We talk a lot about dancing and travelling of course, but also her family history and work. I find out:

• She has previously been married, it lasted 8 years. Hinted that she broke off the relationship
• No kids
• Only child, non-existent relationship with her father (who she thinks is
  “somewhere in San Francisco”) and regularly speaks to mother in El Salvador

Tried some verbal escalation routines in the venue, like asking her:
“Why are you single? Do you murder all of your boyfriends/husbands?”
And
“what kind of guys do you like?”

In response to that second question, she says “I like all guys”. I respond “all guys?” eyebrow raise. She quickly qualifies, touches me lightly on the arm – “no, not like THAT, I just don’t discriminate on nationality/race”. Also told me she is a bit reserved and sometimes has trouble opening up to guys at first, hence the problem with doing sensual bachata moves with guys she just met. She also tells me she “used to think” bald men are sexy, and since I am completely clean-shaven and have no hair it’s a sly compliment. I tell her “good to know”

Overall I was happy with how it was going, and on a high point I pay for the drinks (a red wine taster then individual drinks, so we are about 1.5 drinks in) then I initiate the move to the second venue – a hookah lounge bar close to my place (the same one I fact I took the married colombiana to in my last FR).

We sit in exactly the same place side-by-side that I sat with the married colombiana. She has no problem getting a hookah and smoking it, which is nice (most girls I take to these places don’t want to do it). We also order another round of drinks, I get a beer and she gets more wine. The place is playing hiphop and has a mostly afro crowd, but in general I like the vibe.

Here I escalate more the physical touch, (take her hand to look for “secret husbands”), and building of the topic of her catholic upbringing, try to use some of the sex talk routines from Alek, specifically:
- The “8 different types of orgasms” routine
- The “Most women don’t know where their G-spot is” routine

She has no problem talking about sex, and in response to the “8 different types of orgasms” routine, she starts talking about how simple men are sexually – only one (or perhaps two, if you count anal) types of orgasms.

I also seed the bounce back to my place at this point, talking about how my playlist is better. We are at this place for over an hour (total time out at the two venues slightly over 3 hours).

Eventually, after the venue has turned up the music and we are already close to each other due to the loud volume in the place, I tell her we are going to “le chateau Científico” to listen to better music, have more wine, and dance. She agrees.

We walk back to my place making small talk along the way. Once in my apartment, I turn on the lights, put on music, and pour some wine for us while she makes herself comfortable on my couch. I give her her glass, then stand her up and start dancing with her. This is when I kiss her for the first time, and she kisses back.

What follows is a solid 6-7 hours of LMR. It’s a sexy game where we are dancing or on the couch watching music videos, I am escalating physically by kissing her, she would reciprocate for a minute or two then pull away (or physically push me away playfully), then I would fractionate and try again a few minutes later – or not, making it look like I was about to kiss her (while are dancing) but then pulling away at the last second. Then trying again. A few times she initiated the kissing which was nice. But then would pull away again.

One key moment:

SS: You just want my pussy huh. That’s why you invited me out tonight
Científico: *Feigning ignorance* Huh, no I would never do that.
SS: My pussy is nice you know. So is my ass. You just want to fuck. Just admit it.
Científico: Starting to get into my routine about how I’m a good Christian boy
SS: JUST SAY IT COÑO
Científico: Okay, I want to fuck kissing her

Eventually I lift her and carry her to my bed (literally) and the game continues. She lets me get a little further, and I’m feeling up her breasts and almost getting to her vagina (I notice she has shaved her pubic hair). Her body is magnificent and my dick is rock hard. But she puts on the brakes again.

Another key moment:

Científico: You’re sexy
SS: What is sexy about me?
Científico: Your body of course. But also that you are adventurous and interesting, and have no problem with new experiences.
Científico: What do you like about me?
SS: That you lead.

During one of the points that I am fractionating I turn away from her and close my eyes, finding myself asleep (after my dick calms down). I wake up 2-3 hours later and it’s 4:30 am. She wakes up with me. I try to escalate again but she puts on the breaks again. We go back to sleep.

At 6:30 am, we are both conscious again and she says:

SS: Científico, I’m gonna go home
Científico: Why? It’s almost morning anyway, just wait till the sun comes up.
SS: I want to sleep in my bed and with my clothes off.
Científico: You can just take your clothes off here.
SS: I don’t want to put you in that situation
Científico: I can handle it, besides, I’m not going to let you walk outside by yourself in the cold at 6:30 am
SS: I’m a grown woman and I can handle it

She appears to have made up her mind, so I don’t push further, but keeping my word I put some clothes on and walk outside with her. More small talk on the way back to her car. There are a few people out but it’s mostly quiet and barren at that hour.

Once at her car she drives me back to my place. We kiss again for a nice while (and I playfully tap her cheek) before I get out of the car.

I go back to sleep. Around noon I text her in Spanish. Here is the exchange (translated into English):

Científico: Now it’s noon and finally I got up
Científico: Where did this woman go that was sleeping with me?
SS: Sleeping beauty went to her palace.
SS: She sleeps without clothes
Científico: Que rico (kinda like saying “how delicious”)
Científico: I had a lot of fun with you. I hope you slept well
SS: I also had fun smile/blush emoji

That is where it is now. Chance of date #2 is high in my book. I always struggle to think of a good follow up date to a date that was just drinks and had a successful bounce-back and failed escalation, but I’m thinking maybe live music or walking in the city. I may send a scheduler text tomorrow to try to get something on the calendar for next weekend, since I have several other dates with other women planned for the coming week.

Feedback is welcome. This fits into my typical pattern of getting the bounce-back with LMR, but in this case I actually don't see a lot of things wrong with how this went - other than the fact that I didn't get laid. I was genuinely enjoying my time with this sexy woman. She may just need more time before sex.

 

[Científico]

Today, Sunday, found some time to do a proper daygame outing at a local shopping mall.

Whenever I go to this mall now, I think of my trip to St. Petersburg (Russia) not even two months ago - what an amazing place to daygame. Alas, here the quality is women is not at that amazing caliber.

My goal was to do 10 approaches and I did 11. This by itself is a victory, since I did 12 in the entire month of January (despite what I wrote in the beggining of this journal ). These trips to an in-field location specifically to do daygame are MUCH more effective at motivating myself to approach. Daygame is very difficult otherwise. As you, dear reader, will see below, it's also important to actually do these 10 approaches - most of my succesfull ones came at the later ones compared to the earlier ones.

Note - I am always opening direct, saying "Hey, I'm going to say something cheeky - I think you look very nice"

#1 - Very hot, dark skinned, asian looking (filipina) woman. Slightly taller than me. She blew me off completely

#2 - Blonde girl waiting on the second level of the mall for someone. Her friend arrived and interrupted the set. There wasnt any hook and I let them go.

#3 - No hook. But she looked intrigued.

#4 - listened to sales pitch, again, but no hook and refused number.

#5 - Gorgeous slow walking chinese girl. I saw her immediately from the second level and thought "MUST APPROACH". Since she was walking slowly, my approach completely stopped her momentum. Conversation was good - looks like she is here by herself. Suggested instant date and she refused. But then gave me number when I asked. I'm unsure if she will response since there was no strong hook.

#6 - Blowout. Didn't stop momemtum

#7 - Blowout inside of a clothing store by red-headed cutie. She looked intimitated, even slightly afraid. Some girls are just not used to being approached during the day.

#8 - Blowout by tall blonde. Instead of saying "I'm going to say something cheeky", I went "Can I say something cheeky?" asking the question can provoke an immediate knee-jerk "NO" reaction, which is what happened in this case. I don't know why I reverted to old habits here.

#9 - Gorgeous indian girl walking out of Victoria's Secret. Accused her of being a good cook for Vegetable Korma or Jalfrezi, which she denied, and I challenged her on this. She was intruiged and looked attracted, at one point looking at me saying "you're nice". I had a solid 10 minute interaction with her, eventually stopping her momemtum in front of a Macy's. Talked about India, food, wine, etc. Revealed I am not the first guy to approach her at a mall. Went for the number and she told me she had a boyfriend. Persisted, and after the third (and last time) asking for her number she relented. Continued the interaction for a few minutes after the close. We will see if she responds.

#10 - Short filipina with a nice booty in an H+M. Hooked immediately when I approached. She was laughing and looked happy when I was talking to her. Closed and she gave number without a problem.

#11 - Bonus approach - ethiopian girl with a big booty and very stylish/sexy clothing (big fluffy scarf, little black dress). Hooked when I accused her of working for the CIA and she told me she was actually in cybersecurity. When I asked her out, she says "as friends? Because I have a boyfriend" and I followed with the usual "I dont want to be your boyfriend". Gave out number.

11 approaches, 4 numbers - and three of them were from the last three approaches. Hence why it's important to actually do 10 approaches or more when daygaming - it may be that one is more calibrated and has tighter game after getting blown out in the beginning a few times.

 

[Skippy]

Went for the number and she told me she had a boyfriend. Persisted, and after the third (and last time) asking for her number she relented. Continued the interaction for a few minutes after the close. We will see if she responds.

Nice. I'm curious how you persisted after she mentioned she had a bf and how you continued asking her for her number. Like did you change the subject and then rephrase the ask? I'm very bad about persisting after a girl mentions she has a bf and I usually just end the interaction or let it end smoothly.

11 approaches, 4 numbers - and three of them were from the last three approaches. Hence why it's important to actually do 10 approaches or more when daygaming - it may be that one is more calibrated and has tighter game after getting blown out in the beginning a few times.

I found something similar where I noticed my 5th approach would usually go well. Theres only 1 instance where I actually approached as many as 11 girls though. There is something true about your later sets going better. I guess it's because you're in a more social and warmed up mood by then.

 

[Científico]

Hey Skippy, thanks for reading my journal!

Nice. I'm curious how you persisted after she mentioned she had a bf and how you continued asking her for her number. Like did you change the subject and then rephrase the ask? I'm very bad about persisting after a girl mentions she has a bf and I usually just end the interaction or let it end smoothly.

I really wish I had gotten the recording, but I forgot my microphone at home this time. Otherwise I would be able to give you exact dialogue. It went something like this, not exact dialogue but approximation:

Científico: So how about I get your number, I'll send you a message, and we'll get some wine soon
Sexy Indian (SI): Well I have a boyfriend.....
Científico: I don't want to be your boyfriend, I have a very rigorous application process for that. That's not something I grant right away!
SI: I know...

note - here I can sense some conflict within her. It's really important to pay attention to what women are doing rather than what they are saying. She is talking about her boyfriend yet she has stopped all her momentum and is 100% focused on me now, meaning she is open to persuasion.

Also, instead of saying "That's not something I grant right away!" (implying I might want to be her boyfriend in the future) I should have said something like "I dont even know if you're my type at all".

Científico: Good, I know of a great wine bar you will like *taking out phone*
SI: Well, I dont know if this is a good idea....
Científico: Listen, I'll send you one message, not 18. I am not that type of guy,
SI: I know...

After this I remember talking about something else, I just don't know what. Then I close with

Científico: Well I have to go, but I'll ask for your number again, one last time.
SI: Ok *puts number into my phone*

It's a real number since I see my phone call go into her phone. She hasn't responded to my icebreaker text though.

I found something similar where I noticed my 5th approach would usually go well. Theres only 1 instance where I actually approached as many as 11 girls though. There is something true about your later sets going better. I guess it's because you're in a more social and warmed up mood by then.

I've had this happen many times. One time in October last year, first six approaches were shit, but then #7 was an epic strong hook and I ended up taking the girl out on two dates. Another time, first 8 approaches were mediocre, but then #9 was an instant date with a very charming woman. It's important to put the volume in - 2,3 approaches here and there does not cut it.

 

[Científico]

I almost find it kinda funny that when women now try to control where we go for dates, and attempt to pick some place far away with horrible logistics, I get slightly annoyed. lol.

 

[Skippy]

I really wish I had gotten the recording, but I forgot my microphone at home this time. Otherwise I would be able to give you exact dialogue. It went something like this, not exact dialogue but approximation:

Científico: So how about I get your number, I'll send you a message, and we'll get some wine soon
Sexy Indian (SI): Well I have a boyfriend.....
Científico: I don't want to be your boyfriend, I have a very rigorous application process for that. That's not something I grant right away!
SI: I know...

note - here I can sense some conflict within her. It's really important to pay attention to what women are doing rather than what they are saying. She is talking about her boyfriend yet she has stopped all her momentum and is 100% focused on me now, meaning she is open to persuasion.

Also, instead of saying "That's not something I grant right away!" (implying I might want to be her boyfriend in the future) I should have said something like "I dont even know if you're my type at all".

Científico: Good, I know of a great wine bar you will like *taking out phone*
SI: Well, I dont know if this is a good idea....
Científico: Listen, I'll send you one message, not 18. I am not that type of guy,
SI: I know...

After this I remember talking about something else, I just don't know what. Then I close with

Científico: Well I have to go, but I'll ask for your number again, one last time.
SI: Ok *puts number into my phone*

It's a real number since I see my phone call go into her phone. She hasn't responded to my icebreaker text though.

Thanks, it's clearer to me now! If she ignores your texts because she has a bf, maybe you could try texting her again in 6 months

 

[Científico]

Last night had great sex with the Blonde MILF I met dancing, as I detail in the two FR's I posted on the other board. This is a very sexually liberated woman that has had threesomes/moresomes before per the post-sex conversation we had - this is getting my mind going about finding some other MILF and making something good happen.

Otherwise, this weekend I was lazy on the woman front - not much cold approaching or other lead generation. Was focused on getting some work done this afternoon since I have some big projects coming up.

Also, next weekend I wont be around anyway since I am traveling back to Mexico to meet up with a lover I've had there since 2018.

Life is good. Need to keep up the momentum and make it even better.

 

[Científico]

Just too busy this week with all my work stuff to do much lead generation/finding new women. Will problably see the MILF again on Thursday (my first real free night) and, then, my short get-away trip to Mexico.

I did get contacted by a matchmaker from a website in which people pay said matchmaker (men and women) to find them candidates that fit their criteria to date. It's an interesting concept. I must be on their "good" list since back when I lived in California in 2018, I went on dates with two women from that service, one of which went really well (before going south later due to my poor game at the time). Ever since then they have contacted me sporadically but nothing has panned out.

The blinde date with this mystery woman will happen in 2-3 weeks. I have not gone a date like this since 2018, but it looks like one is coming soon. With this particular website the matchmaker chooses the date location, but once I know I can plan a venue-two with more favorable logistics, and try a fast pull if conditions are right (she is attractive and responds to my physical touch, etc). I am much more experienced now with attempting fast seductions - should be interesting to see how this one plays out.

 

[Científico]

Just got back from my trip to an undisclosed location in Mexico, for a short get away but also to meet up with a lover I've had there since 2018, as I've mentioned previously.

This post will not be about her (that is a story for another day), but instead will be about the approach I made at the airport after we parted.

I'm in the terminal and already past security. I look around and I honestly do not see many sets I want to open. Once in a while I see one that looks tantalizing - only to find out a boyfriend is nearby or with her.

I go to my gate unsure if I will open any sets at all, and thinking maybe I'll be content listening to podcasts. There are a few girls at the gate I think about opening but none that drove me to make a move just yet. I go to a station that has lots of outlets for charging phones close to my boarding gate, and plug in and stand next to it (I find this is a good spot sometimes to casually open girls that are also charging their phones).

This is when I see her. The woman looks vaguely Latina but with white skin. She walks to the gate, looks at it, then turns around and heads over to a row of chairs to ruffle through her bag looking for something. I like this girl immediately but I wait to access the situation before opening (boyfriend or other obstacle coming?)

She comes over a few minutes later to charge her phone next to where I am standing. This is when I decide to open - in Spanish since I thought there was a very good chance she was Mexican. I ask her if she is Mexican. She responds, in Spanish, but with an american accent (to my surprise), telling me she is. It's likely this was just a knee-jerk reaction on her part since just a few minutes later in conversation she tells me she actually isn't Mexican but that her father is from El Salvador.

Overall she responds well, and hooks within the first minute or two by asking me about my trip, my work, etc. I do my usual "are you a beer girl or wine girl" close and go for the number, which she agrees to give me. We chit chat some more before they call my group and I go into the plane, saying goodbye to her.

I think it's over and I can relax now. But lo and behold - the girl walks up to my row, looks at me and the seat next to me, and says "hey I'm actually sitting there".

I respond:
"whoa, that's surprising"
Her -
"Yeah, it is. What are the chances?"

She takes her seat, and again repeats "this is so crazy".

I'm thinking this is going to test my game since now I have a 3 and a half hour flight to be sitting next to this girl. Nothing I couldnt handle though.

We talk on and off during the flight. The first 15-20 min during take-off was some great deep-diving about her family, work, and life. Then there is a lull in conversation before I open her again maybe 30-60 min later.

Crucially, at one point I intentionally let the conversation die, hoping she will pick up the slack and re-engage me with a question - she does! Another point in the conversation that I took as high interest - she asks the stewardess for some headphones to watch a movie (since she had none, and the ones I tried to give her from my bag did not work). She gets the headphones but then gets distracted talking to me that she doesn't end up watching the movie for a good 30-45 min. Towards the middle of the flight we have another long deep-diving session about her work, family, life history. She is talking well over 50% of the time about herself as is the gold standard for this kind of interaction.

I do try to spike things up when she talks to me about how busy she is at work:

Científico: So how do you meet guys then? Do they just come up to you randomly at airport terminals?
Her: *smiling and looking away* Well I am kinda seeing someone right now....but I really don't see him often

I like this response since she is pretty much bringing this person up as information for me but disqualifying him in the same sentence.

Científico: Got it.
Her: You know, I just dont date that much. All I do is work and sleep.

After this mid-flight session the conversation dies again, and I end up dozing off for a time. Towards the end of the flight we just have a few comments to each other before the plane lands. When it does and I stand up as people start to get off the plane, I feel a nice sense of rapport with her - she looks to me and shares things she is thinking, such as "I miss my friends so much" and "hmm, I think that couple were on my flight TO Mexico as well"

When we finally part, she goes to shake my hand, but instead I pull her in close, give her the cheek kiss and say "I'll talk to you soon okay". she says "sounds good".

We'll see where this one goes. I love cold approach for this reason - you can turn something as mundane as travel into something much greater. Once I know where this story ends I'll turn it into a FR on the main board.

 

[Científico]

Sadly, the girl from the airport cold approach described above has not responded to my icebreaker text 24 hours later. I'm surprised but not surprised - this is just how the game is sometimes. Women do not behave in ways we expect often.

I'm thinking I may call her tomorrow and see if she answers, if not, ping her with a scheduler text/date request.

I also pinged some old leads tonight with scheduler texts/date requests, but after these old leads dry up my pipeline is dry again. Happens sometimes after busy work and busy travel.

Need to get back out in the field this week.

 

[Científico]

Managed a nice cold approach Thursday morning at a site I normally work at (big research institution).

On Thursday I was heading into this site for work. As I go in through the visitor gate and security, I notice this asian girl with a friendly-looking face. Something about her told me she would be receptive to my approach, maybe it was a subtle IOI when I caught her looking at me once or twice. I dont remember exactly. But something drove me to approach even though when I go to this location I try to minimize it - I try not to mix work with pleasure.

I open direct once we both walk out of the security screening. She is immediately receptive as my gut told me. Hooks within a minute or two. Is a Ph.D. student visiting from China, but doing her Ph.D. here. I close with my normal "Are you a beer girl or a wine girl" and she answers "BOTH". Surprising since a lot of asians I run into dont drink. I get her number and date is scheduled for next week.

 

[Científico]

Today (Sunday) in the afternoon I was working at a local coffee shop. I really dislike having to work on weekends but unfortunately my current job is making it necessary sometimes - just too much going on during the week and not enough time to sit and focus.

Still, these are great opportunities to mix work with pleasure - as what happened in this case.

When I first walk into the coffee shop, I notice it's not as crowded as it has been on previous Sundays when I have worked there before. I notice a spot open next to a cute and slightly dorky-looking brunette girl reading a book. I naturally go over there and sit. As I glance at her I notice she has a bag that says "Barranquilla, Colombia" written on it. Immediately I know this is a perfect opener.

I do not open right away though, and spend maybe an hour immersed in my work. After this time she gets up to go to the bathroom, looks around nervously then looks at me "hey can you watch my stuff?"
"Sure" I say.

At this point I make the decision to chat her up when she comes back. My opener is "I was going to ask about that bag, have you been to Colombia before?" The dialoque continues:

Girl: Yes, I spent three months there and it was the best thing I ever did in my life!!
Científico: Really? The best thing in your life?? *eye brow raised*
Girl: Well, top three!!
Científico: What are the other 2 things?
Girl: Errrm, ummm - maybe where I went to school in Michigan is #2.
Científico: I think Colombia is light-years ahead of Michigan.
Girl: I know you're right hahaha

There is some more banter like this for a minute or two before she reaches the hook point when she asks me where I am from (why am I so bad at remembering conversations?). I tell her I am originally from Puerto Rico, and since I notice she can say some names in Spanish properly I ask her (in Spanish) if she can speak Spanish. She answers me in Spanish but with an obvious american accent. From there we continue the conversation in Spanish which solidifies the rapport - I get some of the attraction signals (eye contact, playing with hair, slight lean-in).

I do my normal "Are you a beer girl or a wine girl" close and ask for her number. She says sure but then gives me the standard "I have a boyfriend" line. I reply with what I normally use "I dont want to be your boyfriend, I have a very rigorous application process for that". At this moment I notice her smile is reduced slightly (she was thinking something, which could have been any number of things) but she says ok and puts her number into the phone.

More banter in Spanish after that for a few minutes before she decides she has to go, thus initiating the end of the interaction. Interestingly I was about to tell her I need to get back to my work but she beat me to it. I told her it was nice to meet her and that we'll chat soon.

This is the third time in a row I've done just a single cold approach in a random circumstance and had it gone well (airport girl, girl from Thursday and now this coffee shop girl). It's been interesting since my previous thinking was that daygame needed a lot of volume in terms of approaches to get real results, clearly that is not the case when one can recognize good opportunities and capitalize. It is still good to go out on dedicated day-game missions but it's also possible to integrate cold approach into day to day life once the approach anxiety is completely dealt with, which is very good.

Thus far in February I've done 17 approaches and 5 have hooked, which is almost 1/3. Of course none of these numbers have translated into actual dates yet (keeping my fingers crossed for the one from Thursday), but it's great progress for me.

 

[Científico]

Ever had those days when you are just pissed at the world? When motivation is low and negative self-talk predominates your thinking? Today and to a certain extent yesterday were days like this. This is when this whole "inner game" aspect comes into play, as it's important to remain positive and forward thinking even things aren't going your way. I can't always control myself though. I missed out on several cold approach opportunities today because "I just didn't feel like it". Even though things are going well at work, I haven't worked out in several days and that likely has to do with it.

Part of this also likely has to do with the fact that I have had a lot of flakes lately. The airport terminal girl never texted me back and did not answer my phone call thus is a complete dud, I had another MILF I met at a fitness studio cancel our date for tomorrow (though hopefully can reschedule), and now the experience I just had with this girl the matchmaker hooked me up with on Monday seemingly may go no where.

That last point is interesting. Just to quote myself, here is what I said in an earlier post:

I did get contacted by a matchmaker from a website in which people pay said matchmaker (men and women) to find them candidates that fit their criteria to date. It's an interesting concept. I must be on their "good" list since back when I lived in California in 2018, I went on dates with two women from that service, one of which went really well (before going south later due to my poor game at the time). Ever since then they have contacted me sporadically but nothing has panned out.

The blind date with this mystery woman will happen in 2-3 weeks. I have not gone a date like this since 2018, but it looks like one is coming soon. With this particular website the matchmaker chooses the date location, but once I know I can plan a venue-two with more favorable logistics, and try a fast pull if conditions are right (she is attractive and responds to my physical touch, etc). I am much more experienced now with attempting fast seductions - should be interesting to see how this one plays out.

I will write a full FR for how this went down and post it on the main board, likely over the weekend when I have some time to sit and reflect about it, and hopefully have more information about the outcome.

In a gist though, this matchmaker set up a meeting place - a restaurant in the city, about a 30 min drive from my apartment (thus poor logistics). I see this girl and I am in fact very surprised - she is quite a cute brunette! I am wondering why in the world would this girl need a matchmaker if she can probably get dates without a problem from men normally.

We have one drink at this venue, and I am spiking things up as well as deep diving. Then I take her out of there and lead her to a cocktail bar I know of with a good vibe, about a 30 min walk (which she does with me no problem). In the cocktail bar I spike things up both verbally and physically, get her number, kiss her, then walk her to the metro (no attempt is made at a pull due to poor logistics).

Now she hasn't responded to my text sent about 24 hours ago, and I'm thinking my mistake was probably the kissing - turning up the heat can lead to flaky behavior later as we have seen before. Though I'm honestly not sure.

At least I have the Blonde MILF coming over tonight after she teaches one of her classes for food, wine, and more sex - that will likely cheer me up.