RadEng Going All In

[ProblemSolving]

Don't you then lose then all the girls unsatisfied of their current relationship?

In my experience, no. In daygame, I don't believe there is a better way to screen for sexual availability, then asking, "Are you single?" I didn't understand how powerful this line was for screening chicks when Ricardus first posted his article. I, like you, thought I would be losing a lot of girls who were unhappy with their relationships. In the end, you get the same amount of girls, except you quickly screen out the time wasters (girls in relationships).

Night game screening is a different ball game. Here, don't bother with relationship status, just put your hands on her and see how she reacts. She reacts neutral or positively, she's available.

 

[ProblemSolving]

What do you think I should do to increase my quality night game pulls? My only solution so far has been to just keep doing what I'm doing and occasionally a really hot one falls in my lap. You seem like you must be experienced in this realm. Where'd you learn and how did you learn and what we're you're results that are different than this? Even in Aleks articles he recommends sticking with the cute girl that hooks rather than going for something hotter and ending up with your dick in your hands.

Here is what I do:

In a semi busy bar/club, I sit back with a warm, relaxed, and approachable facial expression and check out the surroundings. Look for girls who are alone, or with one or two friends. These girls are highly likely to be sexually available. I usually wait for eye contact, if she looks more than once she's interested. Go and approach, small talk, get in her space, and touch. When she reacts positively to my touch, I give her an excuse to leave with me.

Approaching girls in large groups is usually a waste of time. She has to maintain status in her social circle, so the odds are very low of her going home with any stranger. This is where going for the number might pay off.

In crowded bars/clubs with lots of distractions, I touch girls to move them out my way as I'm going through the crowd. I've basically started the chase by doing this. Interested girls will look at you a lot, physically grab you, all kinds of crazy stuff. From there, it's just small talk, more touching, and providing an excuse to leave.

It doesn't take long for a girl to feel comfortable leaving with you in environments like this. You'll lose far more girls by moving too slow, than by moving too fast.

 

[ray_zorse]

Another thing to think about is that the relentless focus on "quality" as judged by externals like looks, fashion, fitness, ambition/drive, achievements etc... is basically equivalent to pedestalization, I never use a ratings scale and I try to judge a woman solely by the emotions she arouses in me, i.e. how I feel when I am with her. Looks certainly play a role but for me it's basically about the quality of the connection I feel with her. A case in point is my gf Sayuri. I was just fucking around and having fun, building preselection (had been on a date with another JP girl who I did not really like that much and who left to go find her friends, but not before telling me she thought she could hear JP being spoken from Sayuri's direction), anyway Sayuri caught my eye and I could sense a mutual attraction and spent the next few hours flirting with other girls while trying to push through the crowd to get closer to her, after the event finished I spent just half an hour with her, but the conversation was so warm and relaxed and comfortable that I was able to get her on Skype later and eventually arrange a meeting in her city in which we fucked on the beach about 2hrs in... this is what I mean about a high quality connection, she is also hot but that's not an issue. I suggest to have a binary 0-1 ratings system and just go after any girl who is even remotely fuckable, then see how it goes.
Ray

 

[lux7]

Don't you then lose then all the girls unsatisfied of their current relationship?

In my experience, no. In daygame, I don't believe there is a better way to screen for sexual availability, then asking, "Are you single?" I didn't understand how powerful this line was for screening chicks when Ricardus first posted his article. I, like you, thought I would be losing a lot of girls who were unhappy with their relationships. In the end, you get the same amount of girls, except you quickly screen out the time wasters (girls in relationships).

Night game screening is a different ball game. Here, don't bother with relationship status, just put your hands on her and see how she reacts. She reacts neutral or positively, she's available.

Well, extrapolating on very large number, might be right.
Yes, you can also have countless examples of missed opportunity.

I met last summer a married girl.
She went out with me not knowing for sure if it was just a friend thing or more.
When I made my move, she stopped me.
I didn't try anymore, just played it coolly and she hang around at my place for another 20 mins or so talking. She wanted to stay friends and I made fun of that and never contacted her anymore.
Wasted time, one might say.
Yes, for 40-50 days maybe, when she contacted me again saying her marriage wasn't working.
And she became a great LTR.

So yes, maybe lots of times it is wasted time, yet there are plenty of exceptions and many high quality girls do are often in relationships.
And there's also the "worst case scenario", which is you might make a great new friend..

 

[ProblemSolving]

Well, extrapolating on very large number, might be right.
Yes, you can also have countless examples of missed opportunity.

I met last summer a married girl.

How did you meet this girl and in what context? If it was a cold approach in the day and she wasn't vacationing alone, then it's egg my face and a VERY rare event.

You may not be there yet, but eventually you'll get tired of the go-nowhere numbers and start screening girls instead of letting them screen you. How many times have you met a chick, had a great "connection", so you grab her number, she responds positively to your ice-breaker, then goes MIA when you text for the meet up? She was never available and you could've found that out in the first thirty seconds of meeting her.

Approach however you want, but don't rule write something off without trying it. Log your dates to approach ratio with screening, then do it without screening. I think you'll find that you get the same amount of dates, with less time and energy spent chasing down cold leads.

 

[lux7]

Well, extrapolating on very large number, might be right.
Yes, you can also have countless examples of missed opportunity.

I met last summer a married girl.

How did you meet this girl and in what context? If it was a cold approach in the day and she wasn't vacationing alone, then it's egg my face and a VERY rare event.

You may not be there yet, but eventually you'll get tired of the go-nowhere numbers and start screening girls instead of letting them screen you. How many times have you met a chick, had a great "connection", so you grab her number, she responds positively to your ice-breaker, then goes MIA when you text for the meet up? She was never available and you could've found that out in the first thirty seconds of meeting her.

Approach however you want, but don't rule write something off without trying it. Log your dates to approach ratio with screening, then do it without screening. I think you'll find that you get the same amount of dates, with less time and energy spent chasing down cold leads.

Lol no man, no eggs in nobody's face, like you say it's a number question, it might have been a lucky coincidence and, in many ways, it did was.
Yet, would she have gone with a guy she found completely unattractive? And if her relationship wasn't already unsatisfactory?
Later i would get to know she actually asked her ex husband for permission .
Yes, it was a lucky shot in many ways, but a lucky shot i wouldn't have had with a super strong screening.

 

[Lotus]

Hey Bro,

Looks like your about to make some gainz!!! I like your journals, your very analytical in your approach to them. Very enjoyable to read.

One huge realization I have had is that I have completely fell off my mental practices. A month or so ago when I was actively doing visualizations, affirmations, and more regularly meditating with a focus on "man mantras" as I like to call them. I was feeling so good and had a crazy amount of inner confidence that inspired strong action taking and really helped me hammer down some smooth fundamentals. However, lately I have not been doing ANY focus on keeping my mental game strong and instead I find my head constantly spinning with ideas about what I can post, what I need to work on, what I need to do to get better.

It's funny I just realized I had dropped off these exercises as well and Saturday I went back into them before going out. The impact was massive! I can relate it to my sports playing days, when you warm-up and get in state before game days, loads better.

Confidence is everything, if there is any bit of self doubt conscious or unconscious it creeps up into interactions. With the "man mantras" and affirmations your game is on another level, like your a completely different person all the sudden. All of the sudden you were struggling with fundamentals and poof! Now your fundamentals are God Mode!

Realization 3:
Stop asking for the pull before starting the pull. Aka go ahead and start leading to car, apt, etc and just talk. Props to Rob on the pull tips! Also, seed the pull early. Litter the conversation with oh you have to meet my puppy! oh I love that show youll have to come watch it with me. Go ahead and get the plausible deniability rolling for the girl so it seems totally natural and not just like an excuse for sex when pull time comes.Also, just attempt to pull more often.

This one was big for me as well, fully arming yourself with pull options before going in. Specifically deep diving on TV shows and alcohol preferences to prepare for the pull.

Just a couple things I could relate to as reading.

-brum

 

[ray_zorse]

Bullshit man haha in the sense of this is some unbelievable shit you've been making happen. I'm in awe. As for me I came out swinging in the GST but became distracted by other matters, I did go out to some clubs somewhere in the middle once or twice but I am def planning to hit up nightgame and see if I can pull off some actual crazy shit, have had some moments in the past, mainly at dance parties but I want to hone my skills in the more hostile club environment. There's this club down the road that is perfect cos it's a very challenging environment (lots of drunk guys, lots of other dudes approaching, major bitch shields up) but is also filled with hot arse young Asian biyatches dressed to kill, have pulled from there but it's an exceedingly rare event.

Thanks a lot for the kind words in regards to my breakup with Leticia, I didn't expect that and it helped a lot. You have to have a pretty thick skin as a seducer and also here on the boards, since guys are pretty practical and are happy to help where needed, but generally don't give (or don't know how to give) a whole lot of encouragement or validation when the chips are down, so again, thanks. I would have PM'd you but based on the PM sent ages ago, I suspect you haven't discovered PMs yet, haha, look into it if you haven't already.

Ray

 

[ProblemSolving]

Weekly Takeaways:
-Keep inviting home, already surprised at what this can do if done consistently in night game.

You got it man. Getting a girl home is actually fairly easy, just make sure you give her a good reason to come with you. In other words, make coming home with you sound better than whatever she's doing at the moment.

I've actually got a question for you and Ray. Where do you guys meet all these girls? When I'm out running errands, I'm lucky to run into one or two attractive girls by themselves. Yet you guys are cranking out approach numbers like it's going out of style (super jealous lol). Do you guys both live downtown in large cities, or do you just spend a lot of time prowling?

 

[ray_zorse]

I live downtown in a large city, yes, and I'm pretty sure radeng lives downtown too (but he says his city is not as large as Atlanta at least)... but there's more to it than that. Check this article by Sasha Daygame. I make a daily practice of approaching, whereever I happen to be. Well, there is room for improvement, I usually don't approach on super early or late trains cos it feels weird and exposed, hard to do it casually... and often I feel like I'm too tired or not in the mindset to approach, which is also bullshit. But I get enough "spontaneous" approaches out, to keep me limber. In the last month I only went out once specifically for approaching, that was to the beer cafe near my home. But I am planning on upping this because my game sucks at the moment, I'm too platonic/friendly on dates and they're losing interest. So I have to do a lot more dates to get back in practice. I lost a lot of skills due to LTR and hence lack of thirst, even though I was still approaching/dating sporadically. Anyway, I digress, but look, I see a lot of guys complaining "there's no-one to approach" and I refuse to believe it. It's just approach anxiety in another guise IMO.
Ray

 

[ray_zorse]

Hey man, good read. I find your analytical approach quite inspiring -- my journals are more a detailed factual account of what happened, and I have started to question whether this is efficient (there was a post about this which got me thinking).

On the subject of goal setting/analysis, it's taken a few months but my sexual vibe has improved a fair bit, it's baby steps but I am getting a little more interest and engagement now. A fun interaction was the cashier at the ramen shop (big titted JP gal), I asked her a little about her background and so on, the register was at the end of a bench so I was standing very close to her in a crowded, loud restaurant... My eyes didn't leave hers once (even as I got the money out), I think I complimented her jewellery and I said a little flirtatious shit bit basically it was all in the nonverbals, I didn't smile much and just stared into her soul and felt the electricity. At a certain point I said "do something for me, put your number on the receipt, I will take you out to eat ramen somewhere else", I'm not sure of her response and I think I could've persisted. A similar interaction took place outside my office the other day with a new girl, though I didn't ask her out yet. So anyway, thanks for the advice, I am gradually implementing it.

I highly recommend that you move to DC, Atlanta, Austin (would also be my preference -- I'm keen to visit TX after reading Lyndon Johnson's biography by Robert Caro... Texan BBQ sounds fucking awesome even if we do a good BBQ here in Aussie too mayte). I have heard that the girls in Austin are as hot as shit as it's kinda going-out central, Texas (there are also some Tucker Max escapades there). Why not retrain -- if there's anything the breakup with Leticia has taught me -- when you detect a dissatisfaction with the status quo -- take decisive action, if you're thinking about it then it's already late, you should have done it spontaneously!

Anyway, my life improved a lot since moving to the city, I think about 5 million live here, including around 100,000 young university students of whom half are international, and most of those live near me in the downtown. I highly recommend you get into daygame, honestly, it is just so easy, easier than Tinder... you just have to be able to close (same as Tinder)... I have not really been gaming much lately because of a strong focus on work, which I largely neglected for 6mth or more after becoming obsessed with game... but decided to take an early day (worked till 3am last night but left office at 5pm today after my last meeting), and go out to eat. I approached 6 or 7 girls and grabbed a number, if she follows through as agreed then my pipeline looks healthier. Daygame is extremely easy, no cockblocks or bitch shields!

Ray

PS I have to laugh that Asian nurse is hitting you up and grabbing makeouts off you cos this is exactly what Leticia did, took four or five fuckin months and multiple NEXTings due to slow progress (pauses of 1-2 months after which she re-initiated) to finally bed her. Them VN chicks brother

 

[ray_zorse]

Hey man nice daygame approach

At risk of Anatty jumping all over me and saying "I can't tell you to be complacent -- fear is your friend -- destroy your personality and rebuild -- etc", I'm all for being kinder to yourself, this might be why I make such incredibly slow progress, but I feel I'm building a solid foundation and you can do the same. If I were you I'd just approach whoever, it's a subject of endless debate on these boards but I personally go for the low hanging fruit, I will fuck just about anything (drunken bar makeout with morbidly obese chick followed by pulling her home and then regaining consciousness with her in my bed some hours later -- I still tried to fuck her on multiple occasions even though I couldn't get it up and couldn't find the hole, hahaha she's nice tho, works in child protection and I saw her in Court one time as an application against ex-wife ground through the system, but I digress...) and I think you need to normalize cold approach for yourself before you put yourself in more uncomfortable situations.

Ray

 

[ray_zorse]

I see, well I may be on the boards a bit too much, it's a form of relaxation for me, a bit like grabbing a cigarette or a coffee between stressful tasks I suppose. hehe.

The question that occurs to me here is, although you're being very social on a day-to-day basis, how often are you getting dates or numbers through daygame? It sounds like not very often. I found it was quite a long process to normalize approaching for me, but not asking for the date or number was a huge sticking point that persisted long after that. Some rather poisonous mindsets in this regard are:

• It's been an interesting conversation and we've connected well. I don't want her to think I had an ulterior motive.
• We haven't talked for long enough to establish a connection, so it would be pointless to ask for the date or number.
• I know where she works/trains/etc, we can talk more next time and I will ask for the date or number at that time.

The other problem is just moving too slowly, if you don't escalate at a high point then she quickly becomes distracted (gets off the train at her stop, serves another customer or whatever). It's best if you're basically always checking logistics and moving things towards the date request. ABC -> Always Be Closing. When it's a train approach what I'll do is ask her quite early on what stop she's getting off at, and then I'll try to structure things so I ask her out about halfway.

I would also attack it from another angle which is, when you see a real hotty, at least go for compliment-eject, this is just being honest and true to yourself. Edit: In connection with this, you can also focus on your specific approach technology, I find street stops are good practice, and good for compliment-eject.

Ray

 

[Edd--19]

I'm going to second what Ray has said here. When I started to properly do day game I approached loads of girls (or what felt like loads at the time) and then just walked away. It's a good way of getting over any anxiety especially since you don't have to worry about any interaction afterwards. Though a word of caution, after a while of compliment ejecting it'll be easier to leave than to overcome the fear of a conversation, you have to power through anyway. Best of luck!

 

[ray_zorse]

I remember in first FRC you'd just challenged me to use no compliments, touch or sexual frames and to achieve same end by means of sexual vibe, well I felt I was competing with one hand tied behind my back, but I stuck at it with only a few minor lapses and I am totally glad I did so. Your journey is more important. Persevere my brother.
Ray
BTW I just met a cute tourist chick from Atlanta, stars didn't align but I have her email so if I come to meet u I have 1 other friend there, haha. Don't know when that'll be though

 

[ocantu1987]

yeah man direct has only worked 1 time for me out of all my approaches, the only dates ive had, have been indirect. Ive gotten that "aww" before.

 

[ProblemSolving]

Tuesday, still in class but went to lunch at whole foods down the street. Did one direct approach which I was very nervous about.

Hey, I know this is random, but I just saw you and thought you were really cute.Are you single by chance?


I got a big

"awww thats so sweet but I am not Im so sorry!"


Does anyone else get this type of reaction, I feel like this is the reaction I get everytime I go direct. I say it with a lot of sincerity and here my fundamentals were a bit off. I was nervous and way more smiley than I normally would have been. Give me some feedback on that type of "Awww!" reaction if you have any peeps.

I would get rid of the "by chance" part, since it feels like you're HOPING she says yes. Even then, I don't think it really matters. A girl is either sexually available or she isn't, and a girl is either attracted to you or she isn't. "Are you single?" cuts through all the bullshit. If you have worked hard on your fundamentals then raw attraction shouldn't be problem, that leaves only her sexual availability (ie: is she open to meeting new guys?)

"Hey" (Make sure I have her attention)

"Can I ask you a question?" (Builds compliance and anticipation)

"Are you single?"

Here is the thing about being so direct, the girls get screened in or out very quickly. This is what you want when you are after RESULTS instead of reactions. The vast majority of women out there on the street are not on the hunt for a new man, your job is to find the ones that are. Nothing is more efficient than being direct, so approach a bunch of hot girls until you find one that is single AND wants to hang out.

Then I got my lunch and sat down beside a short but cute girl, and I opened indirect, which I am way way way better at.

me:Its hilarious that we just came to wholefoods to pretend to eat healthy.(she had pizza and I had barbeque)
her:*laughs* and says yeah I know that is funny, but it makes me feel better about it!
me:whats your name?....



We ended up having a great conversation about how I want to travel more and how she backpacked europe. However, I found out really soon into the conversation she was married and just found out she was preggers.

There's nothing wrong with going indirect in situations where you are both locked in and both of you aren't going anywhere soon. Most guys start out going indirect because it leads to longer conversations, more phone numbers, and minimizes "rejection". However, it is less efficient because you waste a lot of time and energy on sexual unavailable girls.

I read a blog that captured the difference between direct and indirect approaches perfectly. The guy was starting a new job as basically a street hustler in Rome. He had to cold approach tourists and get them to buy tickets to a Roman Coliseum tour. He was new and afraid of rejection, so he went the indirect route. He'd see a guy wearing a New York Jets hat, so he would open him with, "Go Jets!". He would start conversation, then eventually give him the sales pitch. Sounds like a good idea right? Wrong! Way too inefficient.

All the veteran hustlers were very direct and to the point. They jumped in peoples' face, shouted their sales pitch, and moved onto the next one within seconds. Guess who sold more? The veterans by a landslide. They understood that people don't need to be convinced, they just needed to find the buyers.

Sales, like picking up chicks, is a numbers game. This video explains it perfectly. Coincidentally, this guy actually met his wife while cold approaching for his business.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kZcNMykXUXk

 

[ray_zorse]

I was going to say much the same thing as ProblemSolving about the singles opener in that it demands investment and compliance right off the bat, so it is rather dominant but also must be used dominantly, just as already said. However, I do not use this opener. I think it is too abrupt, but more to the point I do not screen hard, at least initially, because I think the most important thing is our interpersonal vibe, with some girls I just click immediately, and if that's the case I want to see where it goes, even if it's just like "Sorry, I have a boyfriend" "Oh, haha, lucky him, if that wasn't the case I certainly would have invited you on a date... so your boyfriend is also Chinese?"... blah blah blah. I guess this is not conducive to fast seduction and screening girls till I find the girl I'm gonna take home that night, but at the same time, daygame is a pretty mixed bag in any case and it works best for me if I just take the attitude of making women smile. Also I have no issue with fucking another man's girl, if she's down, in fact I prefer it because she's less likely to want a relationship even if I take her on dates (but strangely they still try it on, what on earth can they be thinking, hahaha).

For a similar approach to demanding investment and compliance off the bat I like the "shopping bag / cart" opener due to Glenn somebody, a daygame coach that Chase used and whose book Chase recommended in a GC newsletter, sadly I could not order the book cos his e-commerce site was broken and neither Glenn nor Chase responded to my email queries about it. Anyway, based on what they're carrying: "Oh, no! Sandwiches for dinner AGAIN! I have told you and told you, I do not even LIKE sandwiches!"... if she picks up the ball and runs with it (participates in the game), she should be DTF hahaha, although I must admit my delivery needs practice, often she's completely at sea haha.

Going direct is good practice and good for getting out of your head and stopping "ego preserving" approaches, I like the "totally cute" opener... "I was just walking past/sitting here/looking in your direction/I saw you come into the room/I noticed you earlier and [grounding your opener] it was hard not to notice how AMAZINGLY cute you are, I wanted to meet you/introduce myself/get introduced/talk to you... I'm RadEng". I have gotten plenty of dates and numbers with this, it seems to work well on train platforms for some reason... the tailored compliment also works well and is good with street stops: "Stop for a moment! [pre open with an elbow touch] I just HAD to stop you and tell you how AMAZING you look in that one piece dress, are you on your way to an event?"... I also like to introduce boyfriend talk early (logistics talk and hinting at sexual intention)... sometimes in the opener "Texting your boyfriend AGAIN! tsk, tsk"... or, compliment + "... on your way to meet your boyfriend?"... and if she's thirsty she'll say "oh no, I don't have a boyfriend"... ZZzzing game on, go to an introduction. I think much smoother than the singles opener, maybe it's just me?

Hope it helps. Happy hunting

Ray

PS In JP lately just an excited wave at her can do the trick.

 

[lux7]

For a similar approach to demanding investment and compliance off the bat I like the "shopping bag / cart" opener due to Glenn somebody, a daygame coach that Chase used and whose book Chase recommended in a GC newsletter, sadly I could not order the book cos his e-commerce site was broken and neither Glenn nor Chase responded to my email queries about it. Anyway, based on what they're carrying: "Oh, no! Sandwiches for dinner AGAIN! I have told you and told you, I do not even LIKE sandwiches!"... if she picks up the ball and runs with it (participates in the game), she should be DTF hahaha, although I must admit my delivery needs practice, often she's completely at sea haha.

(... ) sometimes in the opener "Texting your boyfriend AGAIN! tsk, tsk"... or, compliment + "... on your way to meet your boyfriend?"... and if she's thirsty she'll say "oh no, I don't have a boyfriend"... ZZzzing game on, go to an introduction. I think much smoother than the singles opener, maybe it's just me?

Hmm they sound very "gamey" TBH, not very "mannish".

 

[ray_zorse]

The shopping cart opener might be a bit gamey, that might be why I haven't had consistently good results with it yet. I just mentioned it as a way of rapid screening and compliance building, like the singles opener. On the other hand the texting opener etc are just playful, they have to be delivered with a smile and a twinkle in your eye, or exaggerated "this won't do" body language. Very fun, maybe best to do when warmed up and in a more playful mpod.

Ray