The Ladykiller Chronicles

[Kvothe]

Starting a new journal because I’m not happy with how the last one went. Previous journal: https://www.skilledseducer.com/threads/the-postgrad-life.19234/

New username and journal title are references to the fantasy series by Patrick Rothfuss, which features a Byronic hero who becomes quite the hit with the ladies. Here’s to making it happen to me.

Today I did 5 approaches. It was hard, I’m quite rusty and so my vibe wasn’t as good as it could be. I realized I’m also comparing myself too much to me at the end of my internship two years ago. I can’t keep doing that because it took me three months of grinding every day to reach that, and it’s likely going to take twice that amount to get back there.

Today I set a goal to approach 5 girls, and didn’t let myself go home until I did.

I also ended things with my FB, which I think is the best move at the moment for my fastest growth. Feeling more motivated as a result (could be all in my head, but I’ll take it). Will keep focusing on approaching without making it feel like a big deal and improving banter from the get go. Both of those should help me hook and end up on dates.

 

[Kvothe]

Had a coaching session yesterday and did 3 approaches. They all hooked which was good. The first girl had just gotten into an exclusive relationship, so no chances there. What was good was that I carried the conversation in a relaxed way.

After that my coach had me try more indirect approaches while incorporating teasing into the mix. So I’d go to girls sitting down and open more indirectly. I’d make it sexual by teasing them and saying things like “coming to the park hoping a cute guy will catch your eye?”

Second approach I sat next to her and waited for like 10-15 seconds before opening. She responded well and I delivered the teasing line to which she laughed. She seemed busy with work stuff, and I wasn’t as attracted to her so I bounced.

Last girl was a Russian 20 year old. I noticed her reading while looking at her phone, so I opened with something along the lines of, “that’s some next level multitasking you have there.” She laughed in an uncomfortable way, but it became smoother after that. She basically gave me her entire life story, about how she was having a rough time because she has to leave the US today because she couldn’t get sponsorship for work. She also has a boyfriend in Russia, but when I asked about whether any cute guys here caught her eye, she said that she could, but she just didn’t want to, which I did take to mean she would be open to a fast casual fling with the right guy. Unfortunately I had two commitments after so I didn’t try for an instant date. I definitely think that would have been the right move. In the future I should definitely blow off my friends to do so.

It was still a good couple of reference points and I think incorporating the teasing into my early banter will do wonders for my approaches.

 

[Kvothe]

Did 5 approaches a few days ago. Took less time than before, but getting to the first approach still took an hour. Most of them were pretty bad, but at least I'm getting more comfortable with it.

Yesterday I approached again. Did 8 approaches. The first two were really bad, so I didn't count them towards my total of 5. The next one after that was ok, got to the introduction, but the girl was on a phone call. After that approached a girl in a cute yellow dress. Talked for a bit. She said it felt kind of like she was interviewing her, which is how I feel a lot of my initial openers are going. I need to add more teasing/flirting into the beginning. Doing so will get me a much higher success rate. Going to read up on that topic today. After that did another few approaches, without much extra happening. Since I had hit 5, I decided to head home. I was waiting for my bus when I saw a cute asian girl with short shorts and a camera. I just really wanted to say hi, so I did (which I haven't felt in a while), and I started talking to her. I was still too in my head though, but I think if I had been able to have better conversation, she would definitely have given me her number.

 

[Kvothe]

Did two approaches yesterday. Both were decent, but neither girl said they were single.

First one I'm really happy with my decisiveness and vibe, and I gave her a direct compliment. She took it well, I introduced myself, and then she had to leave to go move stuff, so I tried a quick number grab, and she said she had a boyfriend.

It took me a while after that to do another approach, partly because I didn't see too many girls I liked, and partly because I was congratulating myself so much on the first approach that I used the feel good to avoid approaching girls I wasn't completely sold on (still need to improve lowering standards slightly).

Second girl I also was pretty decisive but she was married so no dice.

Next week I'm heading home, so I'm feeling less excited about approaching, since I don't have much time to schedule things.

 

[Kvothe]

On Sunday I spent most of the day approaching. I did about 6 or 7 plus one where my coach opened one and introduced me into the set. That was the only one that I talked to the girl for. Conversationally, I'm feeling stunted and out of practice, which I am. I should read up again on hooking and teasing in the opening and on the approach. Chase's zero small talk flirting will be something to implement once my fundamentals are better.

Yesterday went out and approached, but was only able to do 2 girls. Neither went well. But got a haircut and started exercising, so I'm looking more sexy than before.

Today, I dressed really fucking well, and went out. Did 6 approaches. First 4 were bad, mainly due to my voice and timidity. I need to work on projecting, speaking louder, and making the approaches less timid. Those are the three things to work on tomorrow. Last two girls I talked to. First one I talked for half a minute, then she ejected, and I couldn't keep the conversation light and interesting. Second girl was way less cute than I thought, so I ejected after opening.

 

[Kvothe]

I’ve been focusing on my voice recently and have noticed a huge improvement in girls stopping. From most girls blowing past me it’s switched to them stopping. Need to step up conversationally. Got a number on Thursday that didn’t go anywhere.
Approaches today and ran into this really attractive dance major at NYU. Opened policeman style and just said that I thought she looked amazing (very genuine). It went really well and I’ll try to set up a date this week. Have a good feeling I’m going to start getting more number soon.

 

[Kvothe]

Went out last night. Nothing too important of note outside of that I did two approaches.

Came up with an opener I liked for night game. It's a variation of the one the guy in Vicky Christina Barcelona, except I substituted it with "New Yorkers", with a mild question inflected, but trying to keep it more of a statement. Also made sure to be loud and authoritative. It was received well, but the girl in question seemed more interested in a wing, so bad luck there. Disclaimer that I originally got the opener from one of Hector's articles.

Did one other approach at the very end of the night that went nowhere, but that's okay. I did the approach.

The girl I met yesterday texted back, so I think if I text properly I should get her on a date. Pretty excited, and I have a good feeling that I'll be getting many more leads during the next few weeks.

 

[Kvothe]

5 approaches today. 3 girls hooked, and one of them I asked for the number but she wouldn't give it to me. Suggested adding on IG, but I don't have that...

Also had an instant-date, will try to get her out again:
viewtopic.php?f=5&t=21366

 

[Kvothe]

Did some approaches yesterday, and didn’t get a second date with insta-date girl. I’ll ping her again on Sunday, but I think my texting probably came of as needy, so it’ll be hard to recover.

The approaches were okay, and some girls hooked, but none enough to grab a number or set up a date.

I learned an important lesson about texting-you have to calibrate it to the approach. If it was a short street stop, then it makes sense to have a slightly longer text exchange before inviting out on a date. If the exchange was longer, then you can ask out sooner. Lost out a really attractive girl for this reason.

Back to the grind.

 

[Kvothe]

Went out by myself yesterday, but not much success. My approaches have been going well, and girls have been hooking and responding much better.

Today I talked to about 5 girls or so. Most of them responded well, and got two numbers.

I've been focusing on three things for the past week or so: not being timid, talking with a good voice, and making approaches consistent. I think for the most part, I'm doing much better, so I've started focusing on being more teasing and making my initial conversations more statement-based and less question-based.

The first girl whose number I got had a boyfriend, so probably not going to reach out. The second girl was super warm, and we had a great playful vibe. She's from Austin, TX and just graduated. She's interning until September, but trying to move to the city. So good conditions for a quick thing.

I'm expected to start getting more numbers and dates soon. Can't wait

 

[Kvothe]

Did two approaches before my date today. First one went well. Having more success with policeman stops than other kinds, so sticking with that. I was also dressed really well. Got the number, she's not exactly my type, but looked cute all the same. Had a piercing through one eyebrow, so I don't think I could ever do something long term. She's a sophomore in college, so I'll invite her to coffee next week or so.

Had a date after, FR here: viewtopic.php?f=5&t=21402

 

[Kvothe]

Made two bad texting mistakes that I want to document so as not to forget them.

1. Messed up the girls name in the text, and easy one that should never happen
2. The first time a girl flakes on you, if it seems legit, don’t punish the behavior-it comes off salty and isn’t good. Keep same warm tone unless the flaking becomes a pattern.

 

[Kvothe]

Had a second date with Swiss girl. Will put up another FR. Trying to get her out one more time to seal the deal.

Approached 3 girls yesterday and got the number from the girl I found most attractive. She didn’t respond to the save my number text, but will send an icebreaker later today. I still need to work more on teasing and making conversation more statement based.

 

[Kvothe]

2 approaches yesterday, 5 today. Vibe and energy are shit, and my momentum from the previous few weeks is gone. Will have to build it back up again.

Need to focus on voice projection and approaching boldly without trepidation.

 

[Kvothe]

4 approaches yesterday. Still shitty vibe. First approach was to a really hot girl, but she wasn't giving any investment back, and I didn't know how to deal with the aloofness. Second girl was Lithuanian, but she had a boyfriend. We still chatted for like 10 minutes before we parted ways. Third girl just said she wasn't interested. Fourth one was on her way to an audition, and stopped when I told her I thought she was cute. I told her that since she was in a rush, that I wanted to grab drinks, and she was down. Chatted while grabbing her number, and then wished her luck on her audition. As I left, she said that I should text her (which I take as a good sign).

I messaged her about 45 minutes later, and got a response very quickly, so I asked how the audition went. She replied, and then I sent a quadruple text which in retrospect was a very bad idea. In the future I should limit myself to double texts. Got lucky and she seems to have responded well to it. Will invite her out and see how it goes.

 

[Kvothe]

3 approaches yesterday. Only one worth mentioning was the last one where I noticed the girl glance at me and I talked to her. She was Russian but the main issue was I couldn’t keep up the conversation. Need to improve on that. I should probably watch more standup in my spare time.

 

[Kvothe]

On Saturday did at least 15 approaches. The two that were most interesting was this attractive Ukrainian girl who I opened direct. We talked for a bit and I found out she’s a painter and was off to a meeting. Traded numbers and tentatively have Thursday as a date.

Other one I went and saw her go into a thrift store and spent time idling thinking she would be out quickly. Eventually I got frustrated and went inside and pretended to shop. Positioned myself near her and opened indirect, and then asked her opinion on a shirt I wanted. Traded names and talked a little bit. Bought the shirt then as I was exiting asked her to grab drinks. I had to give her my number and I saw her not save it. Never heard from her.

 

[Kvothe]

Yesterday did about 5 approaches. Most going okay, but I still need to work on being better to get a girl to hook. Ran into a girl with a suitcase who was only here for a night but staying with a friend in Brooklyn. Tried getting her out for drinks and she initially said yes, but I screwed up texting by not being simple and just focusing on getting her to meet me.

Date tonight.

 

[Kvothe]

1 approach before my date today. Cute girl on subway. She said she was kind of with someone or it was just starting. Still grabbed her number and will try to set something up. Don’t think she gave me her real number.

FR from date: viewtopic.php?f=5&t=21483

 

[Kvothe]

3 approaches today, nothing really of note. It started raining and that was a downer.