The Ladykiller Chronicles

[Kvothe]

4 approaches today but elements of fear, shame, and inertia popped up. Along with non-approaching due to social impressions. Following gut instincts is still the main improvement to be made. Cutting out phone usage to better be present throughout the day also matters.

Not going to beat myself up over this. Also there is a balance between relaxed groundedness and expressivity. Ideally you are both, so I need to make sure to practice expressivity.

Self-kindness. Also the difference between urgency and panicked energy. One denotes moving forward decisively towards an end because of knowledge that our time is finite. The other is fear because of an opportunity that might vanish.

 

[Kvothe]

Had a date yesterday and the girl was amazing. I need to approach more because I have some rose colored glasses from scarcity and being touch starved. But still this girl is incredibly my type so we'll see where it goes. Did 2 date model just bc she wasn't free over the weekend and I had other plans after the date already.

She seems excited.

Minor notes-upon making a sexual tease, make sure to keep eye contact to amp tension, as opposed to shifting eye contact.
On a kiss that is not super well-received, don't go for it again-keep in control.

Was really pleasant to enjoy a girl's company who was super warm and sensual and just physically draped all over each other. Very excited to see her again because I want to see how fun she is while getting fucked really well. Need to attune my sexual self more because yesterday was definitely more emotional-toned. I also understand I don't have as much control now over whether we meet again, so I won't beat myself up, but will continue to approach and learn.

Humility, and gratitude.

 

[Kvothe]

A lot of socializing last weekend and improving. Hector says I'm talking more simply, which is good. Mood is up.

Been better at attuning to the girl's level of interest, and am improving at making interactions fun. Have to take a mini-break to finish something else.

Girl from above got deported so yet another reason to move faster.

 

[Científico]

• She's not attractive enough
• She's too attractive
• She looks too young
• I don't feel attractive enough to approach right now
• It's too crowded
• There are too many people watching
• There are too few people
• I feel so emotionally negative that I expect her to reject me so it doesn't make sense to approach

I have experienced all of these. The last one in particular. They are currently preventing me from reaching full potential re: cold approach.

Is there truly a way to overcome?

 

[Kvothe]

I have experienced all of these. The last one in particular. They are currently preventing me from reaching full potential re: cold approach.

Is there truly a way to overcome?

Approach anyway until you get over it? Meditate? Eat healthy, sleep well, workout, and get other things in life handled? Take time away, spend time with friends? Avoid weed, alcohol? Go out with wings? Have a good support system? Journal? Do something nice for other people and get your mind to focus on others?

I do a lot of things, some help-sometimes I feel just taking action is enough.

 

[Kvothe]

Had some surgeries for health issues. In recovery right now. Looking forward to a clean bill of health from January for the first time since 2021.

Writing some thoughts that I'm having that I don't want to forget.

As I simplify my conversational style-I need to simplify how I do gambits too. Making them forced or trying to force them isn't a good strategy, better to have it come across naturally and via the flow of conversation.

Girls are silly and cute. The one who told me dinner dates only I should not take so seriously. Same with most hiccups. Viewing it as fun and exciting is a better more seductive mindset than taking everything so seriously.

Express through facial expressions and body language first, then tonality, then words. If a girl is being strange, call her out in a socially smooth manner. If she's rude call that out and be willing to walk away.

 

[Kvothe]

She wants to fuck you as fast possible. She just needs to feel that you are sexy and dominant enough while making her feel comfortable to let loose.

Wrong model to view girls as gatekeeping sex bc they don't want it. They do and are rooting for you to show them you're the right person.

And the right person doesn't view the girl as the prize-they're going to be higher value and behave in a way that makes it clear.

Being fun, warm, and sexy all lead to that.

 

[Kvothe]

Lot of AA. Need to focus on following my gut and winner effect spread out across more of my life.

Getting back into the gym, cold showers, building my financial independence, etc.

Instincts don't always lead right, but they do lead true. The man who goes after what he wants more consistently is the man who will more consistently achieve his goals.

Also focusing on oppositing negative self talk: "I hate X" becomes "I love <opposite of X>"

 

[Kvothe]

1 approach today. Good vibes, gorgeous girl.

Need to keep an eye on how her vibe is and how much of a rush she's in. Also had the instinct to move her, but didn't, and had the instinct to high five, but didn't. Have to follow those instincts and trust them.

Was a bit too logical, and I think I could have added some playfulness by making some assumptions in a teasing way.

Onward!

---

https://www.girlschase.com/article/skilled-seducer-month-december-2024-allen-iverson also fire highly recommend everyone read

 

[Social_Artist91]

@Kvothe

This is an amazing journal. Loved reading it. Also the fact that someone who has achieved all these successes still feels AA makes me feel a bit better about myself and my own struggles with AA.

 

[Kvothe]

@Kvothe

This is an amazing journal. Loved reading it. Also the fact that someone who has achieved all these successes still feels AA makes me feel a bit better about myself and my own struggles with AA.

Thank you! I def view this journal as more honest and reflective of my day-to-day compared to FRs I post, so I hope you find that helpful!

I don't know what stage you're at, but this was my journal as an absolute beginner: https://www.skilledseducer.com/threads/kvothe’s-journal.15673/

And my journal during a really bad plateau: https://www.skilledseducer.com/threads/the-postgrad-life.19234/

Together is how I would view my overall arc. You can probably improve a lot faster by just avoiding long breaks.

Thanks again for reading and finding value in this

 

[Kvothe]

1 approach today during day. Then was out with @Skippy until 4AM. No approaches though. Still horrible AA that I'm working through.

 

[Kvothe]

Yesterday's approach was better than previous. Was more decisive, warm, and instinctual.

Today was much more hesitant and nervous. But improved to 3 approaches.

Small steps and getting over the fear.

 

[Kvothe]

I know some people view seduction as an extension of their masculinity, and therefore put pressure on themselves to persist to show dominance and be a man.

I know others that view it as an art form for which there is only one optimal path.

I think for me the best framing around seduction is that it's a game. It's fun, but ultimately not very serious. To improve, like anything else, requires dedication. But viewing LMR as a fun challenge, as opposed to an issue with yourself, and other persistence as part of the interesting aspect of the uniqueness for this specific interaction takes a lot of the pressure off. And while pressure is good for me at focusing down and getting work done, it has historically not been good for me for picking up girls. The best lays have been when I've taken the pressure off, and feel much more like a game, where you keep trying until you succeed, but it also isn't going to affect anything outside of the specific run through if you fail.

 

[Kvothe]

Attempting to integrate the above mentality definitely helped with approaching today. First and last set went well.

Other ones went back to viewing things too seriously. Keep that internal world view in mind.

Other notes: instead of saying "steal you away" if she's got some things with either family/friends, suggest "run away together"-us vs them frame, and frames it as more mutual.

Also, don't ask where a girl is from, or about her accent immediately after open. Feels very cliche, and also doesn't lead too much in a good direction. Maybe better to use it as a tool for making a cold read.