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A ray of light in the darkness

Mr. Wes

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 21, 2012
Messages
340
Hey Ray, thanks for the info!
I'm in Osaka now in a hotel close to Namba. I enjoyed Universal studios and got approached by a few curious jp girls. They wanted to take a picture with me. Other than that I got stared at a lot.
You were right about the accent difference. When people say "gozaimasu", I can hear them pronouncing it "gozaimas-oo" instead of "gozaimas"
About to head out for the city pretty soon.
Will update on my journal afterward.
 

ray_zorse

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Aug 12, 2014
Messages
1,982
I just finished my homework and decided to mail my buddy an update, but after sending realized I should be updating my journal instead/as well... so I'm pasting it over.

Things pretty normal here, establishing some semblance of a work routine (fair bit of procrastination though, have been quite active on GC too)... have done a little approaching, stopped a girl with an arm touch this morning which did not work haha, did my shopping and went for a coffee, flirted a bit with cute waitress who normally works in the Korean restaurant near me but has apparently changed jobs to work here, I could vaguely remember her name as "Peta" although it's actually Petra... though I know she has a boyfriend I told her to sit in my lap and other flirty stuff, unfortunately ignored the other girl who I vaguely recall having I asked out last time after a 45min conversation about her home country (Thailand etc)... chatted to 2 girls from Indonesia who were having coffee, one of them was somewhat cute and I qualified/asked her out but she deflected it politely in various ways, I did my best to be nonreactive and continue flirting with her. Other one was a fatty and frankly I wish I had concentrated on her, felt a little bad passing over her, because she was nice. Chick who wouldn't stop walked past shop again with her friend so I waved enthusiastically but she disgustedly turned away, hahaha, for some reason this made me feel really happy (I've been ballsy). Other than that no real news, my approaching has been pretty pathetic lately, at least I tried today, but yesterday I pussied out on some approaches that I really regret not doing. One of them I hesitated and walked up beside her and was going to compliment her on her sexy walk, her tight fitting jeans and her boots and her black and white outfit and potentially her cuteness, but I could feel a tightness between my eyebrows and was worried I would scare her and so pussied out at the last minute. Sigh if only I'd done the earlier ones I'd have been in state. Hmm.

Apart from the above update which covers today and which I sent to my friend... my relationships are going okay. Both my girls call me and message me every day.

On Saturday I had Skype sex for the first time, with Sayuri. It was fantastic. After some chitchat I started playing with my nipple while she said things like "Oh my God! Terrible!" even though she clearly loved it. So I put that away and talked a bit more whilst making outrageous sexual innuendo, then I persuaded her to lift up her top and flash me her breast which she was willing to do briefly (she was wearing a bra under her pyjamas which is apparently because she takes her pyjamas off when she goes to sleep and sleeps in only her underwear, because it's hot there... I made various innuendo about how hot it is in the bedroom and so forth... note she was in a public area of the house with her host family asleep nearby)... and then I told her I need to put my pyjamas on. So I put the phone on the ironing board that I keep in my room and briefly did a kind of strip for her, in which I changed into my pyjamas, she didn't get a good look at my cock but she did see the work I've been doing in the gym haha. Continued to talk about sexual stuff and eventually had her show me her bra and take it off and play with her nipples and her breasts and so on. By this time I was pretty hard so I showed her my erection on camera and told her she was making me very horny and it was all her fault, of course she was shocked but delighted haha. Eventually I said I'm putting my cock in your mouth and you are licking it etc, she moved the camera up to her open mouth and started licking her lips back and forth in a very sexual way, while I kept the camera on my face and masturbated to an orgasm, this took a bit of time and she could see I was nearly there and was absolutely loving it, when I got there I remembered to put the camera back on my cock just in time for the money shot, I was a little late but saw a gratifying spurt of come in the picture to the lower right of the Skype screen haha. After this we cooled off and talked about intimate topics and some relationship shit (I was firm in telling her that I see other girls, she was talking a bit about her boyfriend who cheated on her and I was saying his problem was in being dishonest). Partly to reward her for the Skype sex I have booked 2 days (one night) back in Cairns to occur in a few weeks because Sayuri is going back to Japan and I want to see her before she goes. Sayuri is very sweet and compliant and pretty open minded to new experiences, follows my lead (e.g. the Skype sex) and absolutely loves to be dominated.

Whereas with my regular gf Leticia, she loves me but it's a constant struggle, on Sunday I persisted for about like half an hour to get her pants off and lick her pussy, she initially said she was tired and did not want sex, so I knew I would have to defeat this frame or it would set a bad precedent. So I persisted like fuck saying "sure, no sex, I'm just going to eat your yummy pussy" and saying shit like "I'll just kiss your legs a little" and her saying "you always lie to me, you say only this and it is more" and trying to convince me that it is dirty, me just laughing my head off and playfully trying to rip those panties off... after about half an hour of wrestling (I felt I was rewarding her resistance but on the other hand I knew I would succeed and it was better to blast past it than to do a takeaway)... she said okay but she has to take a shower first. I said no, if you have a shower there'll be no taste, I want to taste you and so on, another 10min later I had finally got down to the pussy and began to eat her, she accepted this for 15min or so and liked it but stopped me before she came. I then had her give me a handjob but actually was not really feeling it, was not so horny because of having masturbated to Sayuri playing with her tits and other stuff for me on Skype the previous night. Anyway, after the pussy eating I got decently hard and was going to quickly throw on a condom and bang her if possible, but stopped myself, telling myself to enjoy the moment and not be so focused on the state of my erection... then proceeded to lose it, she got me fairly hard again later, whilst we were engaging in a little intimate talk, but she then told me that every time we have sex she has to ask God for forgiveness because it is a sin and we are not married... OMG, I tried a logical counter in the sense that she's a very spiritual person which I heartily commend [my own spirituality is developing with the aid of Eckhart Tolle] and it is great that she gets a feeling of peace through being close to God, however I felt the Catholic Church engages in a lot of earthly practices with the intent of controlling people, as well as their spiritual practices which are to be admired... discussed how various religions split off and found they could still be spiritual without all this extra baggage of sin and hell and so forth... she didn't disagree but feels I do not fully understand her religion... needless to say in the course of this I lost my erection again. Oh fuckin hell, I guess she can take it or leave it, I CBF with this bullshit. Anyway, I had rehearsed failure all day in my mind because I was concerned that having had Skype sex I wouldn't be able to have real sex, this was ridiculous and I got what I deserved. I'll see her again today after class and I haven't fapped, so I hope I'll be able to give her the dick that she clearly needs. She will have eaten at work, but I'm planning maybe a dessert (fruit salad), or baking some bread as a treat.

On a lighter note I introduced Leticia to my family last Sunday. I'm violating chronological order here so I should explain I went out all day sightseeing with her (it was her day off and I had promised to spend time with her, later found out it was a kids weekend due to my wife's fucked-up interpretation of court orders that I didn't initially agree with)... then had planned to drop kids at a family event, take Leticia out to dinner, and then pick up kids and take them home and put kids to bed and then enjoy the initimate time with Leticia that I've already described above. But she got carsick on the way home so I did not proceed with the previous arrangements which were to drop kids at my parents for a family event, then take Leticia out to dinner and pick them up again... instead I allowed Leticia to chill at my parents' home until she felt better, and then meet my dad and grandmother etc... (she had already met my mum at the family beach house a month ago). So things are moving pretty fast which is not what I want... but at the same time it went well. I was particularly pleased with myself for not acting all needy and approval-seeking and going around introducing her to all my brothers, sisters etc who think I am a relationship fuckup... instead I just focused on making Leticia comfortable and basically didn't give a fuck what the family thought. A few of them said hi to her and got introduced, but most could not give a fuck so I ignored them. This is much healthier and I am becoming less approval-seeking in general.

I would really like to get some new girls in my rotation because I feel that it is getting much too relationship-like with my current girls, I need to be in a stronger position where they can take what I'm offering or leave it.
 

ray_zorse

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Aug 12, 2014
Messages
1,982
It's been a pretty fun day. I did a few approaches:

On way to tram stop -- called in at a new place for a takeaway coffee. Girl behind the counter was gorgeous. Introduced myself, told her she was unbelievably cute and I liked her jewellery and outfit. Ordered. Said she sounded Aussie and asked if she was born in Australia (she looked Chinese). She said no, overseas. Countered with "Zhong guo ren?" (Chinese person?), couldn't hear her reply. She busied herself behind counter. Got my coffee and called out to her "Bye darling" as I left. Don't think she's a goer. Haha but I'll go back tomorrow and say hi to her again and see what gives. Maybe she just needs a little persistence.

After getting coffee -- said loudly "good morning!" with a cheeky grin to an Asian girl walking past. She was cute. Should have stopped her. Anyway, she looked at me and smiled. Mission accomplished, I guess.

On the tram -- pussied out a little, eventually got ticket checked JUST AFTER I noticed a sign I was outside the free tram zone, and figured I'd better sign my card in. Had to share this freaky occurrence with girl sitting on tram who had cute eyeshadow on. She was nice. Complimented her, added touch, wished her a good day and got off. Then struck up another conversation with girl I'd pussied out on approaching on the tram. She was cute, but only cute, so I wasn't too fussed either way. Asked her about her day, she had an exam so I related a fair bit (how did she sleep, etc)... not sure if I ever complimented her, maybe I did... anyway, correctly guessed she was Vietnamese and spoke a few words of Vietnamese, invited her for a coffee after her exam but nogo, she was shy. Nevertheless added touch and wished her a wonderful day.

Had meeting with postgraduate committee. Sort of half-heartedly gaming the president of the committee, anyway she's gorgeous and we're friends. Was out & about in the campus a little solving problems for committee events, pussied out on a lot of approaches. In particular I was checking my phone and about to text president when came face to face with a little Asian chick in gorgeous outfit. Reacted too slow. Fuck. She walked around me. Wanted to run after her but it wouldn't have worked, anyway I'm working on my reaction times and going for the 0 second rule and trying not to overthink, which is easy to do. What I really need to do is never use my phone while in public, be much more synced with the environment and in the moment. Also need to use my peripheral vision more and employ eye contact discipline.

Went out later for lunch. Said hi to girl behind counter, didn't go for the full monty (compliment, introduction by name etc) because store was a bit busy. Anyway, some argy bargy about what I would have (some things were out), she served me and eventually asked if I would have spring onions. I said yes.... then "after the spring onions I probably won't be kissing you, so you're safe for the time being", had to repeat this joke and girl at register thought it was hilarious. I've been doing this kind of stuff a lot. Just saying outrageous things for self amusement. Although here I could have reversed the frame a little.

Funniest approach was in the afternoon at the postgraduate mixer. Have had my eye on this Chinese chick for a while, she has very full lips, think she'd be 24ish, turns out she's been here 8months and has done a degree in China and is enrolled in PhD here, she also has an interest in Japanese language, although I tested her in it and she wasn't super advanced. I did my usual routine of having her introduce herself in Chinese and then spell her name and explain to me the tones (first word was an up-tone, second word a down-tone) and repeating it back to her. I told her she was gorgeous (in Chinese) and complimented her outfit. Then proceeded to get more and more outrageous... she told me she was on 8th floor so I said "okay so when I take you out to coffee that's where I'll find you". Told her her dress (a knit affair kind of like a long sweater, very neat in a nautical theme, worn with tights) fit well and she looked very sexy in it. She blushed. Told her that I hadn't had much use for my Japanese lately and it's better to learn Chinese because Chinese women are very beautiful (touching her shoulder with sexual eye contact). Told her a silly story about how I'd been in a restaurant with about 12 Chinese for the New Year celebration and how I'd had them teach me how to ask the waitress's name and tell her she was beautiful, and then gone to try out my new knowledge, and how waitress liked it, but I unfortunately did not get a date. Had her sit down with me (moved her about 0 metres I guess), talked a bit more on general stuff. I was having trouble hearing her (lots of students in the room) so I said "it's very noisy in here, I'd suggest taking this into your office [which was on the same floor] where it would be quieter, but I'm worried you'll tie me up". She blushed and giggled. I then asked her for a date "would you be free in the coming days for a coffee, how about Monday?", she wasn't sure (in fact I think it was a brush off), so suggested to exchange numbers which she did. She said she'd forgotten her phone but was happy to put number in my phone. I said "you didn't bring your phone because you are wearing a very tight dress" with cheeky grin and eye contact. She giggled and said no, she'd left it at home by mistake. I called her and said you'll have my number when you get home. She then said she'd have to get on and get back to work, so I kissed her on the cheek goodbye, I wasn't sure if this was a calibrated move so I maintained eye contact as I pulled her towards me by the elbow and simultaneously leaned in, she didn't appear to react badly so I kissed her on the cheek, or more accurately the hair covering her ear, and smiled and said bye. Have recently sent her an icebreaker "Hey (her name), it was fun to tease u a little. u are cute when u blush hehe. i hope u got some useful work done after we spoke :) Raymond"... she's almost certainly a nogo, because demurred on date and I overdid it, however I was being self amused and just saying sexual stuff to make her blush and so I do not really care. Hehe. Still, one never knows, I will ask her for a date early next week.

Then exchanged some text with Sayuri in Far North Queensland who had got home from work, and we confirmed hangout for in 2weeks time (air tickets cost me about $300 which is amazingly cheap). After a bit of phonetag we connected by voice and talked for 30min. Made plans etc, she will rent car for 2 days and meet me at airport and drop me off the next day, we will do some bush walking and some hanging out at the beach, I told her I would also have some jobs for her in the bedroom. I should probably have reservations about having this much contact (texting every day and frequent voice calls) and have been trying to slow it down a bit lately, however the fact that it's our only contact changes things a bit I think. Given she's been willing to have Skype sex I feel I should definitely reward her and keep things going, I really enjoy talking to her as well, and she is 100% lovely in every respect. I would definitely make her my girlfriend if we were living in same city (she wants relationship, but has accepted that I date other women and why, I have also explained a bit about approaching, and been pretty open in other respects). When she called me I was browsing the web for nurses' uniforms, and I have ordered the following items:
Peaches Scrubs Button Front Dress Color: WHITE Size: M
Peaches Scrubs Button Front Dress Color: WHITE Size: S
Nurse Mates "Feels Terrific" 6mmHg Full Support Nursing Pantyhose Color: WHITE Size: A
Landau Scrubs TALL Men's Lab Coat Color: WHITE Size: 42
Butter-Soft Scrubs 4 Pocket Unisex Drawstring TALL Pant Color: CARIBBEAN BLUE Size: M
Butter-Soft Scrubs Unisex One Pocket Top Color: TEAL Size: M
I have also ordered some more enema kits, and bought more surgical gloves. So the idea is we are going to dress up as doctors and nurses and do a role play (she really is a nurse in Japan). I'm going to tell her that it's come to my attention she's been having sexual relations with the patients and that she is going to need to be disciplined. Then will proceed similarly to how it went with my previous GF and the ass play. While I was writing this she's just texted me again with a photo of tonight's dinner. I'm trying not to go into this level of detail about my own life, though I'm not doing too good a job of remaining mysterious.

I also bumped into Iranian girl at the photocopier who I asked out for coffee last week, turns out she's married so not really much of a goer, she is cute and nice though. She is studying user interface and social interaction shit, including video conferencing. So I was making jokes about how she is making Skype sex easier to use and so on. Turns out I have actually met her husband at a birthday party to which I brought my kids, and talked to him for some time (had been wondering if this was his wife and it turns out she is)... was discussing kids and studying, so I told her that Skype sex will be her contraceptive. Et cetera...

Spoke to Leticia on the phone the other day. Have allowed things to cool off a bit since she cancelled previous date leaving me feeling bored, lonely and needy (though I believe she genuinely had to work extra hours)... so I only spoke to her briefly, but anyway she was meeting friends and doing some other social stuff and didn't suggest a hangout so I didn't either. Although she missed me a lot while I was on holiday I suspect that we have been hanging out too much, and so I want to let a bit of anticipation build. Actually, I was concerned she might be dumping me after I failed to give her sex last time but I was probably just being paranoid (have been acting very dominant and masterful lately but I feel I am faking it 90% of the time, and neediness is creeping in, still having shame/ego issues even though Eckhard Tolle helps).

Edit: An Italian girl contacted me who I approached at New Years Eve and hung out with a bit, she has bf but he's cool. The 3 of us are going to hang out tomorrow and make dinner and drink beer. I feel I need to do more of this kind of thing, to keep the neediness away, and have a more normal social life, so I'm really happy. Also got various other social things lined up... a Sunday lunch near the office and so on.
 

ray_zorse

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Aug 12, 2014
Messages
1,982
Hmm so lately I've been doing some Postgraduate Committee work at uni, I joined the Postgraduate Committee to try to become more of a social leader and it seems to be working to an extent. We organized an event on Friday which I was quite involved in (checking location, making contingency plans for rain, inquiring about marquee, arranging signage and so forth)... during the actual event I got talking to a girl who was sitting nearby where we were serving pizza and who took some group photos for us, to be honest she wasn't that hot but she really enjoyed the conversation and I connected with her quite well. She had a bionic ear (I wear hearing aids) and it was interesting hearing about her experiences in being a deaf teenager and how it had held her back socially prior to getting the bionic ear. Proposed a date and got digits and she responds enthusiastically to icebreaker so that's good. To be honest I'm not really sure if I want to bang her, but her body felt good, so I guess there's no harm in playing along.

What has been a bit more interesting lately has been the preselection effect, I go to the postgraduate mixers quite regularly now (in fact I have to go, since I'm an organizer, last week I did not go because busy with work, and received emails asking if I am okay)... I often end up in long go-nowhere conversations with dudes but whenever possible I hit on a cute girl and add lots of touch and try to get the digits etc. For this reason I seem to have gained a reputation as a bit of a womanizer and I think this is a good thing. Chatting to bionic-ear biologist girl at our event, I think did not hurt the cause at all, all the hot girls from my building were at the event and saw her laughing and flirting with me, so even if she wasn't super hot herself, I still think the preselection was good. Then after the event I wandered back to our building by myself and got in a conversation with some research-fellow girl in Information Systems (I opened with a teasing "Texting your boyfriend again!!" since she was playing with her phone)... so we got in the lift together with me adding touch and relating (my research is also business related)... and just as doors were about to close a number of the cuties that I know (who were at the event) got in and watched the process of my continuing to chat up this girl, I ignored them but out the corner of my eye I could see they were kinda amused, and a little bit in awe that I'm basically always hitting on some girl or other, and she's always eating it up. Hahahaha.

Another interesting thing that happened was, as I left the event, I bumped into G-man on the steps who was talking to a cute Indian girl (G-man is also Indian and it turns out they're both from the same city)... they called me over and I got introduced and established that she's an exchange student who is only here for a month or so... so my one-track brain immediately wants to say "oh really you're only here for a month? how about we meet up for some sightseeing, I'll take you to see koalas et cetera"... but I stopped myself in time, because I thought maybe G-man wants a shot at this totty. He's been working very hard lately and not getting out, so I think he would really benefit from some female attention. I haven't had a chance to speak with him since then, but if I do I'm gonna ask if he's keen and if he is, I'll suggest that he ring her up and invite her for sightseeing. If he's not, I'll mark her out for some extra attention next time I see her, although honestly I see myself as a man with options now, so I'm not fussed. As I left, I just automatically put my arm around her and said to G-man "So you'll look after (her name) for me now, won't you" before handing her over to him. Hahahaha.

So after all this I had a dinner party planned, which was with my gf Leticia and an Italian couple, I had approached her earlier in the year with the intention of hitting on her, we hit it off, so even though she has a bf I stayed in touch. She recently contacted me asking about work, and so I realized I could give her some babysitting and cleaning work and we organized for her to come over to dinner to discuss it, bringing her bf, and I brought Leticia to round it out. Well, this all went fine, and I'm also proud of myself for taking control of the situation and politely telling them to leave at 21:30 (which I would never have had the balls to do before GC), so that I could fuck Leticia senseless before taking her home. We got to round 2, although I kept getting soft while she was pounding on me, so it wasn't super successful, but I'm not normally hard enough for round 2, so I consider it a step forward... a bad thing about this sex was I couldn't make her come, this is partly her fault for not accepting my leadership, but I still felt a bit bad. I was also a bit beta, in expressing my puzzlement and confusion at her behaviour, and how I believed I knew what to do to please her, but couldn't understand her views. Unfortunately her main way of achieving orgasm is through vaginal sex and we got her close with adapted missionary, but the rhythm just wasn't working for me. It never does, and this seems to be a sticking point for me in terms of sex, I have recently realized that I have trouble making a girl come through intercourse alone. TBC...

A bad thing that happened was during the dinner party I felt my phone going off in my pocket (arrival of LINE text messages), and I did not check it, because I like to be completely in the moment when I am spending time with one of my gf's, I believe it would be bad form to go sneaking off into the toilet and texting the other one etc. But in this case I wish I had, because Sayuri had been teaching herself "the makeup which is sexy" as she put it, and taken sexy photos for me, so I felt terrible for not having rewarded her appropriately. My God, she looked fuckin' smoking, but I didn't see the photo until 00:30 as I drove away from Leticia's house and stopped in McDonalds to check my phone and potentially call Sayuri, however she had gone to sleep already. Because of the boyfriend-like frame that has been set, I have to give my girls constant attention, and this is fine (I don't consider it a hardship) but unfortunately is not physically possible when I am dating the other one. So I felt concerned that Sayuri would feel her efforts had been ignored. In the event all I did was text her at 00:30 "OMG made of sex... still awake?", and receiving no reply, I left it to the following morning.

Anyway, so I woke up with a massive hard dick and text messages from Sayuri, so I decided to call her and tell her I had woken up with a massive hard dick and was playing with it while looking at her sexy photos, also explained that I had been having a party the night before, and I had not done anything much social since my holiday, so I was really happy to be getting my shit together again. So I'm being a bit beta, firstly I'm not being mysterious about how I spend my time when we're not together, secondly I'm feeling like I have to explain myself when I am unavailable (much as I tell myself not to do this) and thirdly I'm having to give constant attention, and if anything it's escalating (much as I tell myself to be less available and insert some pauses of up to a day without responding to texts etc)... I used to speak to each girl on alternate days but lately it's been both girls every day, 20 mins or more on the phone to each. I feel my relationship management needs work, I have to practice being more of an asshole and not explaining myself, but on the other hand I do enjoy these talks, and use them quite productively for setting up logistics as well as catching up.

After talking to Sayuri and masturbating to an orgasm (unfortunately could not get to orgasm while she was still on the line, so figured I'd better let her go to work)... I then went back to sleep until 1pm which had not been my plan, I have to work both days at the office. Well I eventually got to the office after dealing with some other important errands, but spent the whole time trying to figure out shit with the freight forwarding company, which has suspended my account, whilst sitting on the all-important parcel of nurse uniforms for Sayuri to wear next week for sex play. Fucking hell. Then I went to another dinner party which was fun, I met a cute Swedish blonde but did not attempt to game her beyond my automatic reflexes, such as kissing her and deflecting questions with humour... because I was honestly not that attracted, even though she was tall and attractive. I'm so lame sometimes. (However, she is a personal trainer and we discussed having some sessions together the coming week, I will check if this is allowed at my gym). My hosts wanted to hear about my trip to JP and I ended up telling them about my LDR with Sayuri, and how we met, and showing her photo etc. I probably shouldn't have done this, from the viewpoint of gaming Swedish blonde, but also because I should be more discreet generally. Oh well, they are close friends, I have written about Ying earlier in this journal, she often hosts awesome dinner parties. Anyway, I can't tell them about Leticia now, because they're very conservative.

So that's about where things are at. No real approaching today, was half heartedly gaming a coffee shop chick but pussied out a little cos the right compliment didn't come into my head before I ordered (should have gone with "tall and gorgeous" or maybe "I like your Tartan"), partially recovered later, but it's very important with coffee shop chicks to compliment and introduce yourself before ordering, once you set the "normal customer" frame it's more difficult to get them out of autopilot I've come to realize.
 

snipefield

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jul 14, 2013
Messages
230
Ray, very interesting stuff here. You've definitely gone on to the next level!

I'm curious exactly what you said (and how) to get your guests to leave at 9:30 PM. I'd like to learn a tactful but forceful way to do this, as it's a weak point of mine.
 

ray_zorse

Modern Human
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Joined
Aug 12, 2014
Messages
1,982
Flake city lately, I feel pleased with myself for doing quite a lot of approaching, it really helps to train yourself to be less anxious if you just do incidental approaches here and there throughout the day, many are just compliment-eject, like for instance I was in the supermarket this morning with my 2 younger boys (middle one was home sick and I am a bit sick too), and I would have done about 5 approaches, this place has real hotties too. One was a tall slim black chick who responded well, I asked about her day briefly and then told her with an arm touch that if I wasn't parenting I would certainly stay and talk to her for longer. This is helping to expand my boundaries since approaching while parenting is something I've generally steered clear of in the past.

Grabbed several insta dates and about 4 or 5 numbers in the last few days, some of them I was medium excited about, but none responded to icebreaker and I have a pretty firm policy of using the icebreaker to screen for interest, if I
I don't ask a question and they respond anyway, they're keen, if not I'm indifferent to them and won't put any further effort in, since I'd rather be approaching new women. I suspect I might do better by swallowing my pride and persisting at least once more or trying a voice call, but I somehow feel this is starting on the wrong foot, so I'm trying to behave as a man with abundance.

I am pretty sure where I am going wrong is in not projecting a sexy enough vibe, need to remember to look at them through narrowed, sleepy bedroom eyes more, act more languidly and speak slower and with a more husky voice, also need to be better at the bored look and rewarding chasing by subtle changes in my behaviour or body language.

It's so difficult to remember to do these things.
 

ray_zorse

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Aug 12, 2014
Messages
1,982
A random interaction this morning... some Indian girl I wasn't too attracted to
Me: could you move over a little
Her: (complies... just at that moment the tram lurches and I nearly fall over)
Me: if I sat in your lap...it wouldn't be a bad thing would it
Her: ???
Me: you're off to uni today?
(blah blah... I can't understand anything she says, try to get name of her uni etc... tell her she's talking in a very small voice and to speak up... introduce myself by name... she looks bored and doesn't invest)
Everyone on the tram is looking at us trying to communicate by this stage. I glance over at a hot taller Aussie woman a few seats away, she smiles and then looks away. I see she's with a bf or similar. She gets up to get off the tram and stands in front of me
Me: you could hear our conversation it looks like
Her: mm hmm
Me: she wasn't giving me much (I indicate girl beside me)... if you weren't busy (I indicate bf) I was gonna come over and talk to you
Her: (smiles a little)
Me: I would definitely have invited you for coffee (I'm kind of laughing a bit now)
Her: (smiles a bit more)
These are the kinds of random interactions I'm having, it's very important that if you hit on some girl, and everyone's looking at you, then you just brazen it out and hit on some other girls too, haha. Don't give in to social pressure / fear or worry that by you'll look too PUAey, it really does not matter a fuck what they think :)

I get off the tram, I see a little Chinese girl in red lipstick walking across the street towards me. I hesitate for much too long, but she's beside me so I open
Me: you have a very cute look
Her: (smiles)
Me: I like your red (she's wearing a letter jacket in red and white, it's pretty eye catching)
Her: thank you
Me: what's your name?
Her: (mumbles) why
Me: hey?... what's your name?
Her: why?
Me: uhh, because... if you tell me your name I'll give you a piggyback to the union!
Her: (walks off)
Haha I'm just being self amused, the last thing I want to do is justify myself by saying something like "so we can get to know each other better". I'm also trying to be a bit polarising, cos if she then complied she would have to jump on my back and we'd already be getting physical together, then I'd tell her to grab a sushi roll with me before class or something, and start getting to know her. But I think I am being a bit too polarising... this is something that one of my PUA coaches recommended, for instance I like freaky sex so he says to screen her for freaky tendencies... problem is that it puts too many girls off, like in this case. I think I need to be more of a generalist like Chase, and avoid being too polarising or screening too hard. Particularly with Chinese girls they have a very conservative facade, so it usually wrecks things.

As I'm getting to my building I see another Chinese girl pull her coat around herself
Me: hi there
Her: (smiles)
Me: you have a very warm coat!
Her: yes?
Me: I'm gonna need to borrow that
Her: haha (I made her smile... mission accomplished for now)
Me: (smiles, goes into building)
Since the weather is getting colder I've found this to be a useful opener... her hat, her scarf, etc... "I'm gonna need to borrow that for the rest of the day"... can naturally segue into a compliment "I really like your layers... you look lovely".

Anyway, with my current style of approaching I'm basically just being self amused and saying funny / obnoxious shit, I get a longer conversation about one in five approaches and an insta date about one in ten or fifteen. Obviously I could improve this by pushing my interactions but considering IDGAF and I'm just going about my day, I think it's pretty good for amusement purposes, just seeing how people react haha.

Ray
 

ray_zorse

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It's a great idea, I was turning over a similar thing in my mind cos of the weekly postgraduate mixer function ("Tea Time" which occurs on Thursday afternoon), I have been trying to avoid those "who's your supervisor / what's your research area / when did you start / are you working on any paper / blah blah" conversations and keep it to a personal level, but with this strategy I won't need to, hahaha. There's also a chick I really like who I met there, ramped up the sexual and chase frames to a ridiculous degree and got her number and cheek kissed her (before realizing this was a totally inappropriate thing to do in that environment, hahaha), no response to icebreaker so I decided not to proceed via text ("hail Mary" approach is off putting to girls) but to warm her up a little more in person. I saw her since then and we smiled and nodded, yesterday I also encountered her talking to a friend outside her building, was in a hurry so I just said hello, how are you... and added touch. Next time I might ask about her research, but with sexy vibe.
 

ray_zorse

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Day 1: 7 approaches one of which resulted in a phone number. But 1hr later before I could send icebreaker she texted me this hilarious message:
Her: Hi! How's your dinner with the boys?
I'm sorry for not being brave enough to tell you earlier. If you're after romance, I don't think we suit another. You have children, and probably a wife. Thank you a lot for your time. I hope you have a lovely evening with your family :)
Haha, but she is still responding. I reckon she was keen at the time, but logical brain kicked in. Will propose bubble tea.
 

Mr.Rob

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I'm digging the beast mode attitude Ray!

As far as screening through polarization I know Drexel does that quite a bit. He gets into explicit sex talk within minutes of conversation and he says it does wonders for fun and screening prudes out.

I say keep pushing it and see what you can make out of it and then tone it down a notch if you push away too many people.

Keep it pimpin

-Rob
 

ray_zorse

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Thanks guys for the comments, I appreciate your reading.

It's super important to train yourself to always approach, rather than training yourself that approaching is something you do on Wednesday nights and all day Sunday (as Sasha puts it). I got this from Sasha and it has helped enormously with AA. However I'm often not really in the mood for a longer conversation (tired or in a hurry) so it results in a lot of compliment-eject. Like yesterday I had a super busy day with back to back appointments (several gym sessions with different trainers, haircut, Japanese makeup class, kids' school etc) and I literally had no time to stop or I would be late, but still did the 7 approaches so I'm happy about that.

One woman didn't stop but nevertheless smiled at my audacity, I was gonna tell her her pants fit well and she looked sexy hahaha. Day before I worked really late in office and felt tired and hungry, still approached a girl on tram after some hesitation. I was in my head and felt wooden and just could not smile no matter how hard I tried, but still deep dived, got her sharing okay and asked her out twice (nogo). I'm glad I did this, next approaches I was slightly more warmed up and could at least smile even though still in my head. I think these examples illustrate value of always approaching (which isn't to say I don't pussy out a lot or get foiled by circumstances, if that happens I just try to move forwards and keep approaching the next opportunity I get).

I tried some non compliment openers with intention of following radeng's advice, but it's really hard to change my style and I quickly fell back into old habits. Will persevere.
 

ray_zorse

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Another interesting day. Objectively a really good day although I feel a bit of a pussy. I will explain.

So I was busy all day with kids, taking them to football, etc, I had some time off in the middle of the day while my brother took them out to spend their Christmas money and for a treat... so I went to do some errands and took a coffee and lunch in a cafe where I've been half-heartedly gaming the chick, I didn't really push hard but surprisingly she invested towards the end asking me about my day plans etc... discovered she's separated like me, she asked where I live etc... but I didn't ask her out. Damn. I was kind of experimenting with my sexy vibe and NOT expressing attraction other than the sexy vibe. It didn't really work because I failed to maintain the sultry look and broke into smiles at times and so on. Anyway, I haven't listed this as an approach since I approached her before the start of May, so it doesn't count in the competition.

In the afternoon some previously laid plans kicked into gear, where I would pick up my gf Leticia and she would attend a birthday dinner for my brother, with my family (my grandmother, my mum and dad, all my brothers and sisters and their partners, not my kids or anyone else's -- I had to organize a babysitter for this, who incidentally is Italian working-holiday chick I approached at NYE party and who now does my washing among other things)... I was a bit in two minds about this plan, since I'm not sure I really want her buddying up with my family, but when it turned out she wasn't working and she wanted to see me Saturday, I said well I have to be elsewhere Saturday, but you can join if you like, might be a bit boring for you though. She accepted. I told her she could dress up a little, and that I was sure she would look stunning, as usual.

Anyway, I picked her up at her home slightly before 17:00 and she was in the front garden looking absolutely stunning, she had curled her hair and put on an extremely short blue minidress with heels and beautiful makeup and jewellery and accessories (apparently some dude has just driven past and then turned his car around and stopped and got out to speak with her, hahaha), so we got home at 17:30 and babysitter was scheduled to arrive 18:30, we had exactly one hour to carry the shopping in, tidy the house, feed the children dinner and dessert, bathe them, and for me to get ready. So I took this as an opportunity for a little compliance building, started by ordering her to carry my bag upstairs while I dealt with the shopping and a sleeping child, then gave her an old shirt to wear to protect her outfit, and detailed instructions to cook rice and bone the chicken and fry it etc. While she carried out her tasks I tidied the apartment, including upstairs, then I came down and gave further instructions, helped her a little, went and showered and changed etc. I decided to wear my suit which I haven't worn much, I bought it post GC and it fits extremely well, I looked pretty damn good. Leticia handled her end brilliantly, and we worked as a team to get everything done in one hour. I was extremely pleased with her and I told her so.

So we've got to the restaurant looking like quite the royal couple, and I've led Leticia inside holding her hand, and the waitress greeted us and I could just *see* the spike of attraction from preselection. So while she showed us upstairs I asked the waitress if she was Vietnamese by any chance, turns out she was Filipino and so I said "Maganda ka" -- you are beautiful, and it was on. She turned out to be extremely kind and attentive, I won't say flirtatious but not UN-flirtatious... I added touch and deep dived on and off, however, I probably talked a bit much about myself and my family. I had the perfect opportunity to ask her for a date while Leticia was in the toilet and I failed to do so. I was being too much the gentleman, just thought it would be too assholeish to do this, but now I wish I'd done it, at least for the reference point.

I was also flirting with Leticia a lot and teasing her with sexual remarks and so on. At one stage she was eating butter off the knife and so I told her it would be better to eat it off my nipples and started to unbutton my shirt while she squealed "stop it!" and got physical with me, trying to button up my shirt and take the knife back. She kept accusing me of being drunk. So when the nice waitress offered me another glass of Prosecco I applied a chase frame which I had been turning over in my mind like this:
Waitress: something more?
Me: she (indicating Leticia who is on waitress's other side) thinks I'm drunk... are you getting me drunk?
(both laugh)
Me: I think you are going to take me into the kitchen and tie me up
Waitress: (giggles)
Me: so I have just figured out that conservation in art means restoring paintings and so on, right? (continuing an earlier conversational thread)
Waitress: that's right
Me: it took me a bit to put it together [I had earlier thought she meant conservation in the sense of the environment]
Waitress: how about a soft drink?
Me: oh okay yeah a soda water would be great
Waitress: okay
Me: ...and don't put anything in it! (playfully pointing at her... she giggles)

So as we were leaving Leticia has turned to thank my dad for the meal and I've gone over to the waitress and added some touch and eye contact and said... "I would have liked to hear more about how you restore the artworks and how you got into that in the first place... in different circumstances I would certainly have asked you for a date... here, come here" and then cheek kissed her, she was down, but it got slightly awkward after that, a silence and I forgot to hold intense eye contact and practice my sexy vibe. In fact I avoided her eye and cast around for something to say (should've just continued deep diving her) and eventually she said something like thanks and have a good night. I should've left on my terms, leaving this smouldering vibe between us. Better still I should have grabbed her number, instead of the kiss and boring speech.

Oh well. Fuck it it's all just reference points, it always happens, being too much of a gentleman and then regretting it later. I really should've just put my own needs ahead of Leticia's... this relationship jazz is starting to piss me off, although it's completely my fault... verbally I've handled it right (even to the extent of warning her before sleeping with her that I'm a guy who sleeps around, and that if I slept with her without telling her this it would feel like tricking her into bed)... but by my actions I've set a real boyfriend/girlfriend vibe. It would have been much better just to go to the dinner alone as I normally do, and gamed the waitress like that (especially as I didn't get sex and dropped Leticia at the station before getting snarled up in some f***ing football traffic and taking 30min to travel the half kilometre to home from the station... would've been much better to have brought her home). However, I must say I felt a lot of validation walking around with a gorgeous girl on my arm, and the preselection was good.

I'll count the Filipino waitress as 1 point haha.
 

ray_zorse

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16 approaches today. 2 of them while I was out with my kids. First one was not good. I said "I was going to ask you for directions, but I see you are a tourist so perhaps that wasn't a good idea"... (laughing a bit)... her name sounded Chinese so I responded "ni hao", well turns out she was Korean. So I looked a bit of a dick. I persisted a bit, ended up proposing that we change trams together but she declined. Actually she probably got there quicker by staying aboard, haha I had no real idea. Anyway so went fishing with my boys at the harbour which is quite near my home (you can't eat the fish because the harbour is polluted but we wanted to try out our new rods). On the way back I sat next to a nice girl with a fresh "girl next door" look, I had seen her waiting at an earlier tramstop opposite us, so was a little surprised to see her and commented on this. She was nice although the conversation was not particularly sexual or anything. Turns out she's actually an air hostess for Emirates and lives an expat life in Dubai, was heading back there tonight. I invited her for dinner beforehand but she wanted to sleep. Tried for LINE or email contact, she said she was engaged to someone. Claimed she is not allowed to wear a ring whilst working unless she is married, not sure if I really believe this but anyhow chatted a bit longer and kissed her goodbye and got off.

I was to meet kids' mother in Chinatown so after swapping rods for schoolbags we went there, I threw on a tight t-shirt before we left, as I was planning to do some approaches in Chinatown and thereabouts. I ended up doing 14 approaches. However, I did not use any compliments. This was really difficult to do (I felt like I had one hand tied behind my back, and failed to approach a lot of hotties because I couldn't think of a situational opener or similar)... anyway after various approaches (met a JP chick carrying shopping and told her it was nice of her to cook dinner for me but there was really no need... etc) I ended up in the underground supermarket. Approached a blonde looking at bananas:
Me: hmm so it's bananas for dinner
Her: ...? haha, yeah I think so
Me: and what about dessert
Her: ...?
Me: well if you're already having fruit for dinner, what can you have for dessert
Her: I'm not sure
Me: maybe some handsome Aussie guy for dessert
Her: hahaha
Me: I can hear an accent...?
Her: we're German
Me: Herzliche wilkommen in Australien!
Her: haha great
(she teaches me the German for "how long have you been in Australia" and we bat this around a bit... her friend rocks up)
Me: wow you're unbelievably cute as well (I shouldn't have complimented her but it just slipped out)
(she's happy)
(I introduce myself and have chick #1 teach me the German for "pleased to meet you" by typing it into my phone)
(blah blah)
Me: so yeah when you finish your shopping, lets go and play a game of darts
Her: no well we actually have a plan to look around Melbourne a bit
Me: hahaha do I look like a tour guide? you'll have to show yourself around
Her: haha (she finds this amusing even though it wasn't really that funny)
Me: I would've been happy to take you for darts though... looks like I will have to find someone else
(we smile genuinely at each other and I wander off looking for someone else to open)
So I was getting a bit bored with this shit and decided to amuse myself by being as obnoxious as possible... immediately see an opportunity, a tall Chinese chick who has just finished looking at a display of batteries
Me: I saw you looking at the batteries before, are they for your vibrator?
Her: haha (she doesn't get it at first, then she's amused) they're for my (I can't hear)
Me: Oh, you already have batteries for the vibrator... sorry what were they for?
Her: blah blah makeup blah blah
Me: but why would you need batteries for your makeup?!
Her: mumble mumble
Me: oh... its an eyelash curler
Her: yeah!
Me: I do like your eye makeup (I figure it's okay to use a compliment if she invests a little)
Me: I'm Raymond what's your name?
Her: (her name)
Me: it's nice to meet someone else who is tall, we are about on a level (I indicate our eye level is about right... this was not technically a compliment)
Her: (agrees)
Me: (looks in her basket) okay so in the morning you're making me cheese on toast with fruit, I think I can live with that
Her: hahaha
Me: so how about your day today
Her: blah blah blah
Me: blah blah... (eventually invite her on an insta date to play electronic darts, she declines) hmm, sounds like you're using the vibrator tonight then
Her: hahaha
Yeah so it kind of went downhill from here, I just went around being obnoxious... another really funny one was in a bar later on... I was in the queue for a drink when she came into the bar with a friend
Me: hi there, it was nice of you to come and keep me company
Her: (her English isn't that great, she looks to her friend for help, she doesn't understand but she's intrigued)
Me: I'm Raymond... (we get introduced) is that an accent I can hear?
Her: I did not understand you before, what were you saying
Me: Uhh... I was saying... that I want to stick my tongue in your ear! (this just pops into my head so I have to say it)
Her: (still doesn't understand... consults her friend who rather reluctantly translates for her)
Her: ohh... (looks a bit disappointed and walks off... on the other hand I'm highly amused)
I get a few good conversations anyway... one girl is by herself in the bar queue and I talk to her and I really like her. I chat a little and I start to ask her for a date, she scoots off to a bartender who has become free... oh well fuck her, I hang around for a moment and when she finishes ordering she tries to go around me so I spank her bottom. I then leave the bar and go be obnoxious somewhere else. I have an insta date of sorts with a group of 3 cute tourists from Osaka (but I'm only counting this as an approach) where I take them on a tram to show them a nearby restaurant precinct, however I fuck this up by qualifying myself too much (as having recently been in Osaka and so forth), and then trying to invite myself to join their party, I didn't really care and I genuinely liked them, which was why I decided to be myself, knowing it would probably backfire. At least I showed them how to get where they wanted to go. I collect a few blowouts while walking back along the tramline. Become a bit downhearted, even though it's obviously my fault for not getting out my A game. I wanted to practice my sexy vibe, but again I have enormous difficulty with this, so I'll have to persist.

The last approach of the night was really heart warming though. I decide to call in to the Asian supermarket to grab 5kg of sushi rice on the way home, and chat with the cashier for some time. She's from Malaysia and I love Malaysia... she starts to invest quite a lot. What was I up to today, I mention my kids, am I married, do I have a girlfriend, et cetera and I'm not really gaming her (I didn't find her super attractive), but I'm really enjoying having someone show an interest in me for a change. Eventually some other woman comes to be served so I just get her name and exit, I should probably have asked her for a date before we got interrupted, but it's okay, I don't mind.

Anyway so today's score is 16. Now I have to pack my bags and tidy a bit, cos I'm going to Cairns tomorrow to visit my gf there. Spoke to her for 25 minutes on the phone just now and felt better, I remembered to use a sexy voice for some of the time (a lot of it was mundane chitchat about our day, but I also made lots of sexual innuendo).

Edit: I forgot to write the takehome that I have been mulling over in my mind. Today's experience of not going direct, whilst frustrating, was also quite eye opening in some ways. In recent months I tried going down a path of honesty, based on the book "Models: Attract women through honesty" and the recommendations of Sasha Daygame, they recommend to always go direct and I had really taken this to heart. More and more though, I'm discovering that honesty is not the way to do it... Chase's approach of being more mysterious, and concealing one's intentions to some extent, is more effective. Although I'm good at going direct, I reckon my approaches were getting pretty one dimensional... "see girl... look for attractive item of clothing or makeup etc... open" and it's great to get away from this. Going situational or just obnoxious is fun! And one thing that I really like about it, is it's not supplicating... this is why I'm considering making it my default style. But, I really need to work on that sexy vibe. Now that I'm not using my other tools I'm starting to understand why I have trouble getting out the sexy vibe when I need to... it just doesn't "feel right" to me and I need to change that. Interestingly though, I do have a pretty good sexy vibe when I'm doing bondage games etc, because those times it feels right. So I just need to channel that I think. Also, the obnoxious style I was practicing tonight has an element of push/pull, and push/pull is something I'm also not good at. Looking to Mr.Rob. :)
 

ray_zorse

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Mondays score: 6 approaches resulting in 2 numbers, one was a HK working holiday girl I approached before the Xray scan in airport, re approached later on and talked for an hour, unfortunately it did not occur to me to move her or I would have counted this as an instant date. We really clicked and frankly I admired her get-up-and-go, she is into diving, skydiving and skiing among other things (all of which I could relate to her on), also travel and I was impressed with her willingness to quit secure marketing job in HK to go fruit picking, where she stayed 2 extra mths cos enjoyed the outdoors lifestyle, hard work and social vibe. Her next plan was housekeeping at a ski resort so she can learn skiing after work, she has applied & is taking a break in Cairns for a month or two while waiting to hear back. Yes I really liked this girl and qualified her extensively. No response to icebreaker but it was still a fun time.

Tuesday's score: 2 approaches, in a shopping centre while my gf was back at the hostel by the pool, wish I had talked to girl in sushi shop too but I just practiced sexual vibe, holding eye contact for much too long with a slow smile, she clearly wanted more (but I did not count as an approach, wish I had complimented her smile, if I had I would count as an approach). Anyway, didn't want to be too long as my time with Sayuri before she went back to Japan was getting short.

I have written up a detailed report of my 2 day dirty weekend with Sayuri (actually a Monday/Tuesday cos of our schedules), was somewhat torn by this because it feels like cheapening what we have, to post it publicly, and it feels approval seeking (did not post other recent lay reports b/c this), but have eventually decided to put it online because I think it will be helpful to others to know what can be achieved with a sweet, compliant partner if you lead correctly (especially in light of my recent post in sex forum about the problems that arise when you do not have sufficient compliance, demonstrating that your results depend somewhat on the partner you choose and how receptive she is to your leadership), and how I dealt with the few minor challenges that arose, and might give some ideas for your own creative sex play, thus giving back what I borrowed from others (the orgasm torture etc).

Will post later today or in coming days. Now I'm parenting.
 

ray_zorse

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Okay guys here's my sexy story, hope u guys enjoy the read as much as I enjoyed the writing up, hahaha.

Day one

Catching-up date

We did some nature appreciation the first day, we took a catwalk over a huge water supply dam and sat in a water monitoring tower in the middle of it, appreciating the mountainous terrain all around and just talking and connecting... then it was gonna be a nature walk, but the park warden strongly advised not to attempt the climb over slippery rocks etc in inappropriate footwear (mine and to a lesser extent hers). This did not turn out to be a problem, as we instead went to a picnic ground of Sayuri's host family's suggestion. This raised a familiar dilemma of when is it appropriate not to lead, especially with a gentle, submissive partner such as Sayuri... since she had even brought a hand drawn map of the area (and a picnic) it was clearly best to adopt and reward her contribution.

We ate the picnic with many compliments from me and joking remarks that I love "washoku" i.e. her, and more catching up and sharing (actually she said she had made obentou for us, but host sister had been so admiring she had allowed her to take it to school and quickly made chahan for us instead... hehe which illustrates what a kind, giving person Sayuri is, I said I was glad about this), followed by making out on the picnic rug, initiated by me but liberally sprinkled with flirtatious chase frames "stop it! people will see!" "you are so bad!" "you are going to eat me aren't you" and so forth... hehehe decided not to rush things and just took time but eventually said "we had better get me checked in, hadn't we" i.e. let's fuck, and she of course took my meaning and giggled, this is something I do a lot but particularly with Sayuri, I think it is important to still be flirtatious and use sexual allusions even when you've "got" her, because it is fun and attractive and keeps things interesting, also proves to her what a dirty, sexual mind she has :)

Checking in

We had to chill by the pool a little before we could checkin and then I flirted with hostel manager who was funny and sexy and English... I approached office where she was standing inside the glass doors preparing to open and she started making funny faces behind the glass, so I immediately kissed her and gave her a raspberry through it, was hilarious and the banter was quite charged after that. She appeared to be a naturally quirky and funny person and gave me a tour which was highly amusing, especially her introduction to, and subsequent teasing of, another guy who was working there, whom I later realized is prob her bf, haha.

Catching-up sex

Anyway, when we checked in (to a beautiful and secluded hotel-like room for an unbelievable hostel price, thanks to TripAdvisor), it was basically regular sex but enjoyable and we both got into it. I had been worried I would not get hard, and during the wait by the pool I really became quite anxious and rehearsed failure a lot (despite the fact I'd been fine on the picnic rug, but that was a place we could not have sex and ergo there was no performance anxiety). I had to be very stern with myself in reminding myself that Sayuri loves me no matter what, and just wants to spend time with me, hard or soft cock she will not care... and that I should just focus on doing what feels good to me in any given moment, instead of feeling I have to please her with a big hard dick. It helped.

I wasn't getting there with regular sex or doggy style and eventually went a bit soft, so I had her blow me and this was unbelievably great, I did not remember her being so good at oral, but as I write this I recall a long conversation we had on Skype about oral techniques and some of my fantasies surrounding this (e.g. her having her best friend teach her to give head using my cock as a testbed), and I now realize she might have researched it in the meantime. Goes to show you shouldn't just automatically accept things but should speak up where appropriate. I filled up her mouth with come and she didn't swallow but kind of let it slide out where it went everywhere, on her cheeks, chin, legs, all over me, etc, I'm not sure how this happened and I don't think it was intentional but it was one of the most erotic things I have ever seen. We both laughed and laughed and cleaned up with a bath towel. I then ate her until she came, despite her thinking sex was over.

Taking her out to dinner

After this we had a sleep for a couple of hours, I kept waking up really confused and drifting off again, this happened because I'd been on an early flight, had got up at 4.30am after going to sleep at 2am, having not allowed enough time to iron shirts etc and do other preparations such as cutting and painting my nails etc, so I was not really in super great shape, but anyway it did not matter. We tried to go to Teppanyaki but it was closed on Monday and ended up going to Chinese, chose this because it had live seafood in a tank (a guilty pleasure) and because Indian would give us curry breath. The restaurant was great, chatted to waiter a little, but it rapidly thinned out till we were the only ppl there, and then a situation occurred which was just crying out to be gamed...

These three hot and fashionable young Chinese women came in and sat in the middle of the restaurant, near us, and started breaking out expensive champagne and basically bringing the party, I badly wanted to approach and they would have welcomed it I am sure, but pussied out with the rationalization I was spending quality time with Sayuri. So then they brought out a litre of Johnny Walker blue label (must be fuckin' loaded, and just come in from airport duty free, Cairns is a tourist mecca, SO FUCKING AWESOME for game especially if your tastes tend towards the Asian persuasion, not that there aren't shitloads of hot blondes etc too) and started pouring generous measures. This was better and better!!

I watched the body language with amusement and a running translation to Sayuri as waiter told her (group leader perhaps) (presumably) that BYO is wine only and they'd have to order from the bar... and she pouted and flirted in this unbelievably cute / pathetic way, hit all the right buttons hahaha so it was on. Shortly afterwards I saw him take thne glasses from the table and head to the bar and I thought oh, I'm mistaken, he's confiscating them after all... but no she was just treating the barman and other staff, hahaha. Older Chinese owner guy then sat at their table socializing (and probably being a randy old goat) for the next some hours, I wished it was me.

After the running translation I did try to focus on Sayuri and our delicious food and to a large extent succeeded, but couldn't help stealing glances. I nearly got the balls to approach as we were leaving but it seemed a bit pointless. Anyway made a lot of jokes about eating for the team and talked about general stuff, a fair bit about language learning and cultural differences, a bit about her experiences as a nurse in Japan, her childhood and family and so forth. Note I paid for the dinner which is the frame I have set. I don't mind doing this because I know she would be happy to pay half, it's just if she did so I'd probably choose somewhere cheaper and I don't want to do that. Anyway, she pays for most other stuff, such as our breakfast the following morning, without me having to ask, because she appreciates the fact that I treat her. Good girl.

Back at the ranch...

Back at the hostel I was not really feeling like doing anything... thought I might not get hard, though not super worried due to recovery time excuse, but it was mainly that I couldn't think of anything interesting to do, regular sex would be boring and tying her up and slapping her would just be being a one-trick pony... but anyway made out with her somewhat, did get pretty hard but wasn't in any rush to put it inside her and just enjoyed the moment and eventually got soft again. Then I realized that I had brought the vibrator (a medium sized pink dildo with in a sort of OOOO shape so it's quite rough to slide in and out), and this would be a good fit to my current mood. It was hard to get it inside her but after a lot of warming up against her clit I eventually did, she still didn't get that excited till I started shoving it in and out, and this did the job eventually, hehe. She was grimacing and grunting and gritting her teeth to get there, made me horny too, so after this I had her give me a handjob and after some further makeout I got inspired to try and lick her arse, something I've been thinking about.

So I grabbed the silicone based lube (we get through a lot of this) and started lubing up her arse, when she realized what I was doing, she's just looked at me kind of giggling but shaking her head in resignation and saying "OMG really?!"... so I've finger fucked her arse for a bit and then got her onto all fours and gone to lick it, which was not that easy but eventually I have got the job done. I can't quite remember what happened after that, maybe further handjob, but eventually we were just talking and she's jokingly said "well what about YOUR arse?"... so I've quickly said, "right, okay" and turned over and had her return the favour. It was great, she was doing good and so I passed her the vibrator and had her use that too. Only problem was when she went at it hard I realized it would be more comfortable if I took a shit, so I've had her stop and gone over to my backpack and grabbed a new enema kit that I ordered last week and that I'd been planning to use on her as part of the sexy nurse roleplay... and said "You are a nurse, you know how to use this right?"... the expression on her face was priceless. I put a litre of cold water in, and she got right down to business.

So I took only half a litre at first, which sounds pathetic but I had experimented with 1.5L at home and could not hold it and ended up making a massive mess all over the freshly mopped bathroom tiles (was absolutely disgusting but also hilarious at the same time), it was difficult to hold this in and took all my strength, but after some minutes it got easier so I was brave enough to take the other half, and could hold it for 10min with difficulty. So after getting dressed and going into the main building to expel and come back, I had her continue with the dildo and it was pretty good, I had never been fucked before although I must say I doubt I could achieve orgasm like that. When she wiggled it around she would get my prostate which felt good, but made me want to pee, so it might be easier to relax into it if using a bathtub or similar. When I said she could stop, she in fact didn't for a long time, and so I realized she actually LOVED doing this, haha, so I chase framed her, but I also filed away the reference point.

After this she went to have a shower and I finally allowed myself to check msg from Leticia, which I do not do as a rule because any msg will just invite replies, and I feel if you are having multiple relationships you owe it to her to be in the moment and make her important in your time together. She had rung whilst I was making love to Sayuri and phone had gone off silent for some reason which was embarrassing. Anyway she was worried about me and asked me to contact her ASAP which I did (by text) although it was 1.30am and she was no doubt asleep. I felt quite bad although I had (briefly and as incidentally as possible) mentioned I would be away. Anyway we then went to sleep.

Day two

Pre breakfast play

Woke up with a headache (24hrs since drinking a coffee, also aircon was $1/3hrs, and had turned off in the night which was a little uncomfortable) and needing to go to main building to piss... I let her play with my piss boner briefly then went and came back and we had regular sex which was good, it wasn't super interesting except that I added some bad-girl need-to-be-punished talk and spanked her till her bottom was pink and also slapped her face a bit saying I'm sorry, this hurts me more than it hurts you etc, but I was not really feeling it and it felt a bit weak and pathetic so just went back to regular sex, I got there although she did not, but hey I need to stop people-pleasing haha.

As I post this report I also recall that somewhere in the middle of this I tried to penetrate her arse, had extreme difficulty which appears to be for anatomical reasons, and so I warmed her up a little with my finger and then tried again quite seriously, but she eventually collapsed on the bed wincing and I was a bit horrified, "ohh no, did I hurt you?" ... normally this would look a bit beta, but I was genuinely concerned, and also she's certainly earned the right to see all of my personality, not just the dominant side. Well she was cool with it, so I said "okay maybe some other time, we'll have to warm up better" and washed my hands and my cock with soap, and then we continued with regular sex.

Checking out

At this point it was time to tidy up and check out, still had not had breakfast or a coffee and had a headache, but a great thing happened: While waiting in reception a dude turned up with a parcel, it was the sexy nurse gear!! So I signed and we checked out and I opened the package in the car to show her, kind of thinking I was approval seeking and should keep it for a surprise, but this turned out to be a good move overall, she was kind of laughing and shaking her head and a bit speechless, then saying "you ALWAYS surprise me"...

Breakfast / hanging out

So after a breakfast and a large and much-needed coffee from a slow-gaming waitress chick (who might have been imperceptibly disappointed to see me with a partner, oh well, had forgotten her name in any case which never helps the cause)... we just hung out by the pool all day, there were a few chicks I wanted to approach but did not, spoke briefly to an American dude though. For a good part of the day I was making sexual remarks on a medical theme, just having fun but also unintentionally warming her up for what was to follow.

"Nurse, I am extremely disappointed in you... singling out particular patients for attention is against hospital protocol, however much extra care they may need."

"Nurse, it has come to my attention that on at least three occasions this month, you have presented to work with a ladder in your stockings. This will not do at all."

"Nurse, as a disciplinary measure I have put you on mopping the floors this week. I will show you the broom cupboard now."

Changing for dinner

When it started getting cooler we went off to shower and change and this is where it got interesting. I told her we had to try on the sexy nurse gear to check the size, so we found a big bathroom on ground floor next to communal kitchen, where there was a bit of room to move apart from having a shower and a toilet in it. So we first had a shower and I must say Sayuri was as sexy as fuck in a zip-fronted pink bikini we had bought that morning in a discount store, so I played with her a bit in the shower and got hard immediately, making jokes like "there was nowhere to hang the towels, so ...".

Then after this gave her the dress in a size S to put on, I will get it made tighter and taken up but it was still a pretty good fit. I was disappointed in my pants which were a bit too long and baggy (size M) but the top was perfect. I fucked up on the labcoat because an Australian size 42 is 42cm in the collar (what I wear), whereas an American size 42 is 42in in the waist, haha so it was much too large, anyway I just didn't wear it. She had this sexy black lace underwear and a black strapless t-shirt bra underneath. When she put the stockings on (nursing support hose in white, small size, and pretty tight on her) she looked as sexy as hell, and QUITE the genuine article.

So of course I had to make out with her, whilst saying things like

"Every time we have surgery together I'm daydreaming about your sexy little body, only if I slip with the scalpel do I realize my mind is elsewhere."

"Doctor/nurse relations are strictly forbidden in this hospital, but it's for the good of the patients if we fuck so that I can put you out of my mind for a short time."

"We are going to have to show you some procedures, one of them will be giving you an injection with an extremely large needle."

"Wearing black underwear under your nurse whites is strictly forbidden and it drives me crazy. I am going to have to report you to the Matron. She never married you know. I hear she has her own methods of disciplining the young nurses."

"Hurry! We have surgery. We can be 5 minutes late, but no more."

"Report to me in my office after surgery."

She plays with me and I get those stockings and panties down and she's as wet as hell. Only thing is I cannot get hard, must be the anticipation leading to performance anxiety, also that I know it's our last opportunity to have sex maybe ever... also I may be a little intimidated by the illusion we have created, it's straight out of a porn film. I throw a towel down and order her onto her knees to blow me for a while, she does and I get medium hard but not enough to penetrate her from behind with the stockings pulled down like I want to do, and as soon as she stops I go soft again anyway. So I give up on that tack and just sit down on the toilet with Sayuri in my lap and proceed to kiss her (lips, neck, ear etc) and finger her, and she gets into it.

It's rather difficult to get her legs apart with that tight hose on, but I do so anyway, do come-hither for a while and eventually get two fingers in there, but what eventually does the trick is roughly pushing her clit from side to side and stimulating it through the hood, again she's gritting her teeth and moaning and the whole thing gets me pretty turned on, so after she recovers a little I have her stand in front of me and play with her tits while I lean back against the toilet cistern and masturbate to an orgasm. The combination of her pink nailpolish with the white outfit and black underwear is extremely erotic and gets me there quickly. We then just look at each other and burst into uncontrollable giggles for several minutes. Although I could not fuck her, it's easily the most erotic thing I've ever done, and she appears to agree with me on this point, going by what she said to me later on.

Winding-down date

After this we packed up and went to a pub to check it out, its the main nightspot although we've been too busy to go in the night. I felt I had earned a pint of Peroni and got a bit drunk (she does not drink). We then shared pizza at another famous Cairns spot. Convo was pretty intimate, she taught me the Japanese for some of the things we said in the roleplay and I deep dived her a little more and discovered some new things in regard to her life plan. I really respect her thinking, and I could identify with the things she said, by thinking how I would feel if I was pursuing a career in Japan where I did not speak the language well. The more I know her, the more I think she really is a fantastic person. I would like to help her with immigration matters if I can (sponsor her or whatnot) but this might send the wrong message, might also be supplicating.

The airport and flight home

In the airport we didn't go into a lot of conversation, some, some jokes and a little relationship talk but nothing that was unwelcome to me, we both just kept it light and talked about the wonderful memories we are creating and promised not to forget etc. A lot of just looking into each others' eyes [note that for some reason I am fascinated by plastic surgery, the same as I am fascinated by piercings and tattoos despite the fact I'll probably never get one myself... and I recently found out about this bizarre thing which is called double eyelid surgery and is popular in Korea... well Sayuri has a perfect set of double eyelids, not that I care since I find single eyelids just as attractive, but anyway her eyes are as sexy as hell and I can stare at her anatomy for hours, I find her epicanthic fold and the deep dark colour of her eyes also incredibly exotic and sexy... I call her "sexy eyes" among other things, and liken her eyes to deep pools of oil and so on, good positive reinforcement for her since like most Asian girls she's fixated with the dumb idea that she has small eyes or that smiling makes her eyes look small, go figure] and a bit of discreet making out. We were talking about the new experiences we'd had together, and I revealed the fact that I had never had Skype sex before meeting Sayuri. She said she couldn't imagine Skype sex before, and that the fact that it happened was purely down to my persistence. She jokingly used the word "ganko" (頑固) which translates to "stubbornness; obstinacy", but after consulting the dictionary I corrected this to "koji" (固持) which translates to "insistence (positive nuance); persistence; strong-willed". Note that I also take baby steps.

Wrap up

Both my girls messaged me while I was on the flight and I've called Leticia from the Skybus, I may have been slightly dishonest as I deliberately gave the impression I was meeting friends I met in the youth hostel, but I did not tell any lies and I do not think it would do her any good to tell her "the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth". Sayuri knows about my self improvement journey and about my involvement in pickup. Leticia doesn't.
 

Raqimus

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jun 22, 2014
Messages
460
Fuck Ray, your killing it man!
 

ray_zorse

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Aug 12, 2014
Messages
1,982
Thanks Raqimus. I still feel I'm lacking the complete process from approach to lay, but I'm compensating by doing a shitload of approaches, and having some regular girlfriends to take care of my libido... I would really like to take a new gf this month though. Wanna go for that 50 points, but also want to try to retain her as fwb, not ons. Unfortunately, I'm too attached to my gf's and they are to me, so it's not a genuine fwb situation. I wasn't patient enough to decline dates or delay responding to texts etc, so it moved pretty fast in both cases and now looks like proper relationship, which has become a juggling act. I find myself caretaking her feelings, when I should be more honest.

Today's score is 9 approaches of which 1 resulted in a number. Numbers 1 to 6 were of no real consequence except one of them, a Japanese girl with her friend in a city cafe, where I was eating some soup and having coffee and icecream with my son. I complimented her on her piercings, and chatted a bit (why is she in Australia and what is she up to today, etc) but ejected too early, it turned out they were not in a huge hurry and wandered around the shop a bit checking the displays of chocolate for sale. So I could certainly have deep dived a bit more. When I realized this I tried to call my girl over for further conversation, but she declined saying she had to be off to university. I doubt she was really in such a hurry, but I just looked a bit weak by ejecting too early, and so there was not sufficient attraction for her to go out of her way to continue things.

Number 7 was a lot better, TBH I was not initially attracted but only approached because we were standing around the bus stop together, but when it turned out she was Turkish and from the same city as my former housemate I could relate a little and check a few words with her in Turkish language and so on. Anyway, so I asked her some basic questions about herself and she was sharing like crazy, qualifying herself and so on, so it appeared she might be attracted. Her English was pretty hesitant and we were discussing her living situation, and how you get lazy with housemates that are from your own country (like in her previous house) and don't practice English so much. Then I told her she needed to meet a handsome Australian boyfriend to improve her English and she agreed and started telling me she'd broken up with her previous boyfriend, green light my friend. So I chatted a bit longer (so as not to appear reactive) and then invited her on a date for next week, and grabbed her number. I was conscious that she would soon reach her stop, this is something you get better at with experience (checking logistics and keeping track of time passing and her state). I added touch during the conversation and cheek kissed her at the end, letting my hand linger on her arse as she turned to disembark. May have dropped the ball after this as I called out something after her, but hopefully she did not hear. Anyway, no matter. I'm about to send her an icebreaker and we'll see how that goes.

Numbers 8 and 9 were an interesting case, they work in a cafe which is open late and where I had another slow gaming chick (got as far as getting other chick's number and texting her, but very slow responses and excuses, then eventually she told me she would stop working because of starting some work experience for her course and I haven't seen her since then)... I liked them both, but I did not use my normal approach of introducing myself by name and complimenting her before ordering (this usually gets her out of autopilot) because I wanted to mix things up a bit, and also I thought maybe one of them was a re-approach (actually I don't think so but was playing safe).

So as a more casual opener I just started joking about the $50 note they had taped to the counter for anti forgery purposes and bided my time slightly, and then started asking her about her work procedures and how she makes the buns I was eating etc. This allowed me to segue into where is she from (Vietnam... golden, I immediately said "Em la ngoui Viet khong? Anh thich noi tieng Viet!" ... "You're Vietnamese? I like speaking Vietnamese"... then turned to other chick who I found much hotter and asked her if she's Vietnamese too... then asked in Chinese if she's Chinese... hahaha she looked confused so I said "I asked you if you are Vietnamese... then I asked if you are Chinese... but I'm not lucky today"... turns out she's from Hong Kong.

While VN chick went to do some jobs I started flirting like crazy with HK chick... asked her about her schedule, she says she works blah blah and Saturday mornings so she cannot go out on Fridays, I quickly replied that I would definitely have taken her out on Friday... my sexual vibe was probably weak, but by no means nonexistent, I think I am improving just slightly... deep dived her a bit, complimented her English... asked about Foundation Study (which is when foreign students spend a year to learn English at the university before being admitted to the course they're enrolled in), qualified her that she didn't have to do Foundation Study because she's very smart, she said "I'm just lucky"... I quickly replied, "your boyfriend is lucky"... batted this around a bit, with some more play on words "he gets lucky" and she kind of winked at me a bit and said I could call him up and ask him how often he feels lucky... et cetera... went a bit more serious and started talking a bit about LDR and her boyfriend's travel plans etc.

I was a bit disappointed that HK chick has a bf but bantered some more, figuring it wouldn't hurt to just keep her on the back burner and see if she gives me any signals, and eventually ended up talking to VN chick again, she is nice and I strongly considered a number grab, if only for the points, but I decided to follow my normal procedure of concentrating only on one girl from each group, so I kept it pretty friendly with her. Eventually I was wanting to leave and they were about to close anyway, so I gave them both a kiss on both cheeks and went. I think this is pretty good going, considering I was totally zoned out on the bus to/from dropping my kids to their mum, and pussying out on approaching a lot of hot women due to not being in the correct headspace, and had been planning simply to go home, drink a wine and go to sleep.
 

Lotus

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Nov 12, 2014
Messages
624
Ray,

I love your arrogant/sex banter. Going to have to start reading through these. :)

Seems like a lot of those would be extremely effective if you got your "sexy" vibe down that your working on.

-brum
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

Howell

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Sep 23, 2014
Messages
189
Hey Ray, reading through your journal (damn, you're active!) and it got me thinking that you might have a few things to say about doing pick-up with kids. I don't have kids, but I suspect you may have a few tips for guys out there who feel restricted and don't know exactly how to integrate being an active parent (like it sounds you might be) with picking-up. Ever think about doing a write up? Could be a good way to organize your thoughts, and it's also a topic that's I don't think has been covered around here yet. Could be interesting.

Howell
 
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