Cultivating the X Factor

[Beam]

Forced myself to get out of my rut today. Made three approaches - first one was younger than I thought (she had braces) and politely said thankyou but kept walking. Second was a harsh blowout - was a two set (they looked around 18/19), she looked at me and said "oh god", I persisted and she said "sorry" in a sarcastic tone while walking away with her friend. I didn't take it personally, I got the feeling that this has happened to her before hence the snap reaction. Third one looked angry, but when I approached her loved it and said I should keep doing it (but she had a boyfriend).

 

[Beam]

It's been a crazy couple of days.

HBHiker was supposed to come over on Wednesday, and we confirmed a couple of hours prior, but two hours beforehand she texted me saying that she'd locked herself out of her house! Since she had to sort that out she couldn't come over anymore so we rescheduled to Thursday. I am going to write up a full report (LR--) since I don't really know how to handle this one but to summarize, she came over, we didn't sleep together but we spent hours in my bed making out. She kept resisting my escalation attempts. It was still an extremely intimate experience, probably one of the most intimate experiences I've had in years.

Wednesday was St Patricks day. Some of my wings had invited me out but I had declined because HBHiker was coming over. So when she cancelled, I went out. There were initially three of us - my wing, another wing friend and another cool guy I hadn't met before. We were talking and chatting about how we all got into this when another friend of my wing arrived, who I will call A.

Immediately, it was like a light switch had turned on. We were all sitting there chatting and having a good time, but when A came in, he came in like a grenade and just dominated us all immediately. We immediately stopped talking and fell into his frame. A was a big dude, not fat but tall and muscular. His body fat was a bit higher but he still had the face of a greek god. He came in and introduced himself, and spent the next half an hour captivating us with his stories. It was hard to describe the feeling, but it honestly felt like me and the other guys were women in his presence, just sitting there laughing at his stories, and wondering where he was going to take things.

Over the course of the night he kept up with this immense energy despite being in his own words "dead from three hours sleep". He told us he used to be a natural with women but had fallen into a bit of a rut, and part of the reason he'd come out to meet us was so that we could help him get out of it. He approached quite a few sets and managed to captivate them but didn't know how to escalate to even a number close.

The dude said some pretty fucked up stuff though, about black people. And kept using derogatory terms to describe certain women we saw throughout the night (not in a jokey way but in a messed up way). And he was laughing and making fun of the openers we used which kind of annoyed me. I got the feeling that deep down he was unhappy, and was right when he told me so. Because of this I thought he wasn't someone I wanted to spend too much time around. But I did know I could learn a thing or two from him.

I didn't approach many sets that night. I noticed myself getting a bit jaded - it was a stark contrast seeing the way he acted and the way I acted. My body language was closed off, quite, and outcome dependent. His was larger than life, boisterous and captivating. I needed to channel some of that energy.

And so I did, two days later. Report to come.

 

[Beam]

Focus

Being able to switch on the alpha state of being (dominant, loud, smiling, extroverted) at will. I've had many moments when I have been like this but most nights I go out I am not. The only way to be able to being able to switch it on at will is to practice switching it on, every day. This is probably one of the single most important things I can do to improve my game, as it flows on into everything else.

Saw this Julien Blanc video which was pretty eye opening, in which he discusses the four layers of communication:

One of the most eye opening parts was when he mentioned how even asking questions can be value giving, depending on your tonality. And this is something I have been doing during daygame. One of my wings who watched me in set commented a while back how I asked so many questions, but they came across so smooth. This is an explanation for why that worked for me.

 

[Beam]

I am starting a new challenge. The 30 day positive extrovert challenge.

I have found negative thoughts have started creeping back into my mind over the last couple of weeks. Unproductive thoughts that have made me not approach as much and when I have, they have been pretty shitty, awkward and coming from a place of neediness. I think this is coming from the fact that I am not outcome independent anymore. Because I started getting such good responses from daygame I started to expect them, so now I am invested in her response and if it isn't positive I start wondering what's wrong and getting in my head. These negative mindsets have crept into my work as well.

I have read Chases article on depression in which he talks about switching negative thoughts off when they come up, and have tried it many times, but quickly forget about it. And telling myself that I'm going to do it every day doesn't work, as again, I usually forget to do it after a couple of days. So I need to make it a habit that I am checking on every day. Just like I took cold showers for 30 days and did the four women a day for 30 days challenge, I'm going to do the 30 positive extrovert challenge.

In summary, whenever I am feeling down or having unproductive thoughts, I will switch them to positive thoughts.

When I am talking softly or in general being low energy and draining around others, I will put a smile on my face, raise my voice, and get into that dominant, outcome independent state. I know what that state is since I've felt it before, but practicing getting into it everyday will, if not fully locking it in, allow me to know how to tap into it whenever I please. This is something Tony mentioned in the meditation class yesterday that really resonated with me.

I'm curious to see how this will carry over into all other areas of my life, especially my interactions with others. I wonder if, being introverted by nature, I will start to find it draining or whether the positive responses will create a feedback loop that energizes me further and further. Unlike the cold shower or approach challenges which had a concrete end (you've had your cold shower, you've approached four women, done) this challenge will be constant throughout the day.

I won't be recording every day of the challenge here, I'll be doing it in a separate personal journal.

 

[Beam]

Well overdue for an update. I have been failing the 30 day positivity challenge. Mainly as a result of these two reports:

LR--: Over to my house twice, but has refused escalation to sex both times. Not sure how to proceed!
LR--: LMR: Sexy dancer straight got up and left due to "age gap" (but I'm guessing something else was going on)

I actually broke down in front of my family over the age gap one, and broke down in my room, feeling suicidal. It wasn't the girls in particular, it was out of general frustration.

One thing I have been failing to do is having compassion for myself. And also, focusing on what I am doing right. It is easy to focus on where things went south (and they should be focused on so that they can be fixed). But at the same time, in both the above reports, I did so many things right. I managed to get two really sexy girls into my bed. I managed to attract a sexy 20 year old - and this is the first time I've ever done anything sexual with a girl born in 2000 or later which is a bit of a milestone and an ego boost too. Even though I messed it up it was still validating.

I have approached a lot of girls over the last few weeks - mainly from nightgame (though occasionally daygame as well, that's where I met the HBDancer) and my openers have been quite strong. A lot - but still not enough to the volumes that I need to see real success. Some memorable ones:

- I experimented with guns "you look like my ex-girlfriend" opener - first time I used it the woman was laughing and all smiles. She had a boyfriend but wanted to keep in touch so "we could all hang out together". I politely declined.

- Today I did a nightime street approach where this hot blonde walked past. I ran past and instead of using "gorgeous" in my direct opener like I usually do, I used "hot". She was all smiles and giggles, asking me what I was getting up to. Turned out she had a boyfriend, when she told me that I asked her how it was working out for her (stole that from Tony's post today). She giggled some more and said it was going well. I feel the hotter, athletic girls will appreciate the boldness of calling them hot as opposed to gorgeous, I need to field test this more but it makes sense.

- A table of three - all on their phones. I went up to them and made some comment about this being the most energetic table in the whole venue - and I needed to have some of that energy. They all burst out laughing and immediately opened up. Talked to them all but started isolating the hottest one sitting next to me. They were all older, like mid 30s. The other two I think started getting jealous and started grabbing the one I was talking to to leave. She refused my offer to show her around the bar district I live in.

Mimicking girls who are on their phones or calling them out on it works really well. This is something I got from a pickup group I'm part of.

- A hot blonde girl in bunny ears. Opened her asking if she was the easter bunny and if she was going to give me eggs. Got into a long conversation with her and her friends which they clearly enjoyed but failed to isolate.

- A hot blonde across the bar that locked eyes with me. I went across that way, sidled up next to her and said confidently "I was across the bar, spotted you and thought to myself "That's a girl I want to meet". And so here I am." I was so confident about it that she gave a little laugh and seemed impressed. She didn't give me much to work with but asked me who I was there with. I didn't know how to push the interaction forward so ejected.

I currently have two new leads - both from the last two days. A cute greek girl I met at the bar last night and a pretty hot jewish looking girl I met last night (doing night streetgame for the first time on a weeknight - it's getting dark earlier now). Aiming to set up dates with them both this week.

I need a concrete focus

Coming back to the second post in this journal - my looks are at a good point now. Point 3 - My Game - Particularly my verbal skills - moving the interaction forward to the bedroom - need work.

That will be my focus now. Conversational techniques. Working out new openers. Seeing what works and what doesn't. Knowing the attraction phases and having gambits for each one. Memorizing some RPOs which can be used anywhere.

 

[Nicko]

Beam Im very keen to see your transformation into a killer womanizer in the next 3 months or so , your getting closer and closer with these consistency of pulling girls home.

you can just feel the excitement, even with not being able to sleep with but there will be times you would be frustrated but before you know it you have done it!

‘’Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done!’’-Rocky Bolboa

Just one more hurdle and you have done it, keep pushing and be stubborn as hell!
Keep on going forward Beam, your so close you just don't know it ╭( ･ㅂ･)و ̑̑

 

[Beam]

@Nicko you're the best man

 

[Nicko]

@Nicko you're the best man

hoped it helped!!

stay positive no matter what. it all starts with a positive thoughts and discipline(taking action)

it will prevent you from falling for victim mentality and helps you create an abundance mentality.

Victim mentality is the common norm it crushes dreams and hopes in this world don’t become a victim ever.

Change the negative into the positive no matter what. You’ll see your problems in a better prospective and work towards fixing the problem.

Keep on fighting!!

-Nicko

 

[Beam]

One issue I run into time and time again is a lack of calibration - yo-yoing between showing too much interest and coming as not a challenge or too little interest when she is excited sending her into autorejection. I'm getting better - last year I lost girls who would have been open to seeing me again because of a clumsy uncalibrated kiss at the end (these were all short dates where the girl had to leave first and we were not going to be sleeping together that night), but now I'm better at reading the situation, knowing where her interest level is and have gotten second dates after deliberately not going for the kiss at the end.

I don't know how I hadn't seen this article before but it seems to have all the answers I am looking for:
https://www.girlschase.com/content/why-it-feels-her

And related (linked in the article)
https://www.girlschase.com/content/how-use-compliance-tests-move-fast-girls

Being a Challenge to Women (& REALLY Turning Them On)

Back on the article about gym pickup, The Tool (one of our forum members as well) commented in asking about ways he could meet girls in the gym as a member of the staff, without overstepping professional boundaries: “It was 8 am and this girl wanted to Tan and she had another hour before she...

www.girlschase.com

Also I haven't been updating the journal as much but I have been out in the field, planning on posting a proper update when I have time.

 

[Beam]

Just have to put this out there. Cold approach is amazing and constantly boggles the mind. How else can you knock off work, go walking around and 20 minutes later be texting an aspiring model 10 years younger than you to set up a date? This just happened. Would have been an instant date but she didn't have her ID - we set plans for this evening but it was pouring rain and her last day of classes is tomorrow which she wanted to prepare for so we're aiming for next week. Also number closed another chick 5 minutes later. Four other approaches, one was a very pretty blonde girl who I saw other guys checking out beforehand and it was a nice, fun interaction - I could tell by her body language that she was attracted - but she had a boyfriend.

But... gotta keep a level head. I know how fickle this game can be so I'm not going to get too excited. But when you take a step back and realize what you're doing and how amazing it is... wow.

 

[Beam]

Updates:

TLDR:

1. Focus on knowing where you are in the interaction with her (pre open, open to hook etc) and have material prepared for each phase so you know how to move things forward.

2. Gauge her interest level to determine if she thinks you are too much of a challenge (autorejection), too little of a challenge or in the right zone, and learn how to handle each of these states accordingly.

3. Experiment with a few techniques at a time. It's easy to get overwhelmed. Choose a couple of things to work on and hammer them out, then move on.


I'm going to focus less on talking about the leads I have and more on the techniques and mindsets that I am developing and that I need to use, to try to maximize my return out in the field. I've been inspired by @Lofty s journal and FRs in which he specifically references the techniques he is using (elicitation, qualification etc). It's so structured and easy to understand that of course it will help make the concepts sink in.

1. Conversation/ Phases of the interaction:

In my update from the 5th I said that conversation and verbal skills were going to be my focus now over looks (which are pretty well handled now). What I've realized is it's one thing to memorize a whole bunch of gambits, lines and responses, but once I'm out talking to the girl it goes out the window. To help me, I am starting to focus on phases of the interaction and what is happening in each one, based on this article. I read this ages ago but it didn't really sink in:

Pickup Priorities: What to Focus on in Each Phase of a Seduction

Knowing what to focus on in each phase of a seduction will facilitate a smooth end game. Get your priorities straight, and all else will fall into place. Contents 1. Before Going Out 2. Early Game Pre-Approach During the Approach Two Important Caveats Hook Phase 3. Mid-Game Early Mid-Game Late...

www.girlschase.com

This will help because, I might have a hundred gambits that I know that can be memorized, but only 5 that should be used in the open to hook phase as an example. So when I'm talking to the girl, rather than getting overwhelmed thinking "which of the 100 gambits should I use?", if I know that I am in the open to hook phase, my job of choosing what to say is easier because now I have 5 to choose from, which is a lot easier to recall and less taxing on the brain.

I have set up a Notion page (sort of like Evernote on OneNote) which has each phase as outlined in the article, and then child pages under each phase with gambits and lines that can be used. With this general structure in place (which I am still developing), I can then start practicing each phase of the interaction to lock it in.

My desire to memorize more gambits and responses to force specific outcomes has been partly inspired by "The Game" which I started reading a couple of days ago. I've relied so much on natural charm to date (which has been good for getting dates from daygame) but which has been a failure in nightgame. Seeing how far Style got with them was amazing to read. The book in general is amazing, like reading a legend.

So, knowing the phase you are in and having an arsenal of tools to work with in that phase. Work in progress.

Last night, I was also better at not acting too impressed with what the girls told me. One told me she owned her own studio. Instead of saying "wow" I immediately asked her why and within a minute found out she had gone into business, didn't like it because of the bias against women and so thought "screw it, I'm going to do my own thing". Chase mentioned somewhere that skilled conversationalists are good at extracting the most information out of people with the least amount of effort. This is a goal of mine conversation wise.

The Conversationalist

Conversation and the conversationalist: probably one of the most under-discussed topics in the social arts. What a pity. Conversation is part of the backbone upon which everything related to socializing is built upon, but in the 21st century that’s almost forgotten. You might go so far as to say...

www.girlschase.com

2. Her state (calibrating yourself to her)

Inspired by this article, I am now starting to become aware of where I lie on the spectrum of interest with girl using the ACER (Aloof, Compliant, Enthusiastic, Rude) model.

Being a Challenge to Women (& REALLY Turning Them On)

Back on the article about gym pickup, The Tool (one of our forum members as well) commented in asking about ways he could meet girls in the gym as a member of the staff, without overstepping professional boundaries: “It was 8 am and this girl wanted to Tan and she had another hour before she...

www.girlschase.com

After reading the article and going out last night, I was seeing the interactions in an entirely new light, for instance:

Set 1:
Waiting for the tram, opened a cute brunette asking what she was getting up to. She hooked immediately. When the tram came I got on, sat down and she took the seat opposite me. I recognized that she was neither in autorejection and also saw me as a challenge. I was right where I wanted to be. So I rode that interaction and number closed. Probably could have qualified/screened more. She's responding to my texts.

Set 2: Approached a two set of pretty young looking girls sitting down. Chit chatted and joked around with them, gave them recommendations for clubs to go dance in the city since they were visiting. Two more of their friends came while I was talking. They were a bit drunk but friendly, one on the end in particular, a blonde, started saying that I should come with them to the place I'd recommended. There were four of them so we wouldn't have fit in the uber, I didn't think it was worth it and also I didn't want to dance - I declined saying that we were going to stick around here - and two minutes later the blonde who said I should come there too was mouthing off at me - "Why are you still here?" "Leave". Before reading the article this would have freaked me out and I would have bailed, but because I recognized it as autorejection I had fun with it, saying "Nah, you girls totally want me to stay" with a smile, saying it was cute. But that made her angrier. I forgot that when she is in autorejection, it's better to be authentic and chill and that chase frames are better used when she doesn't think you're much of a challenge. In retrospect, I'm thinking I should have tried isolating her "Hey X, there's something I want to tell you", and when alone gone into a spiel about how I thought they were actually cool. Maybe? I don't know.

Set 3:

Me and a wing approached a four set. He took the prettiest brunette, I started talking to the nice looking blonde, two of the overweight friends were there talking amongst themselves. One of the overweight friends left which made things awkward. My target started trying to get me to talk to her (the overweight friend) instead. So obviously, I was not coming across as much of a challenge. I started teasing her more, deep diving. Then I attempted to isolate "Hey Y, there's something really important I have to tell you". She actually complied and came over, but then when I said I would tell her but wanted to chat a bit more first, she got cold feet and said she wanted her (the overweight friend) to be there too so walked back.

Set 4:

Very pretty tall girl with another girlfriend and a guy. At the end of the night, approached direct. The guy admired the balls but I wasn't enough of a challenge. It was too much of a friendly interaction in which I was talking to them all (the guy was sort of dominating the conversation a bit) and so I didn't isolate. Didn't qualify or screen but went for the number close. It was weak, and I have had no response as expected. How could I have become more of a challenge. Well, I could have deep dived but her friends were there, could have chase framed but she didn't give me too many opportunities to. The other option was compliance compliance compliance. Ding ding ding.

Compliance and compliance tests. For these girls who don't think I'm much of a challenge (the majority of hot girls I approach at night it seems) I need to focus more on compliance.

This could be asking her to show me something that she is wearing, telling her to come with me because "there's something really important I have to tell you" as I attempted to do last night, and so on.



This is all a lot to take in, so I need to focus on

3. Experimentation (Choosing a few things to work on and hammering them out)

For conversation, I've narrowed down a few routines which I want to practice (examples, Styles best friends test, Skills "who are you here with" response, the 5 lies game and so on).

I need to develop simple compliance tests now to practice. I already have one I can practice - "I have something very important to tell you" and then isolating her. But I need smaller ones to build up to if she refuses this request.

 

[Nicko]

Updates:

TLDR:

1. Focus on knowing where you are in the interaction with her (pre open, open to hook etc) and have material prepared for each phase so you know how to move things forward.

2. Gauge her interest level to determine if she thinks you are too much of a challenge (autorejection), too little of a challenge or in the right zone, and learn how to handle each of these states accordingly.

3. Experiment with a few techniques at a time. It's easy to get overwhelmed. Choose a couple of things to work on and hammer them out, then move on.


I'm going to focus less on talking about the leads I have and more on the techniques and mindsets that I am developing and that I need to use, to try to maximize my return out in the field. I've been inspired by @Lofty s journal and FRs in which he specifically references the techniques he is using (elicitation, qualification etc). It's so structured and easy to understand that of course it will help make the concepts sink in.

1. Conversation/ Phases of the interaction:

In my update from the 5th I said that conversation and verbal skills were going to be my focus now over looks (which are pretty well handled now). What I've realized is it's one thing to memorize a whole bunch of gambits, lines and responses, but once I'm out talking to the girl it goes out the window. To help me, I am starting to focus on phases of the interaction and what is happening in each one, based on this article. I read this ages ago but it didn't really sink in:

Pickup Priorities: What to Focus on in Each Phase of a Seduction

Knowing what to focus on in each phase of a seduction will facilitate a smooth end game. Get your priorities straight, and all else will fall into place. Contents 1. Before Going Out 2. Early Game Pre-Approach During the Approach Two Important Caveats Hook Phase 3. Mid-Game Early Mid-Game Late...

www.girlschase.com

This will help because, I might have a hundred gambits that I know that can be memorized, but only 5 that should be used in the open to hook phase as an example. So when I'm talking to the girl, rather than getting overwhelmed thinking "which of the 100 gambits should I use?", if I know that I am in the open to hook phase, my job of choosing what to say is easier because now I have 5 to choose from, which is a lot easier to recall and less taxing on the brain.

I have set up a Notion page (sort of like Evernote on OneNote) which has each phase as outlined in the article, and then child pages under each phase with gambits and lines that can be used. With this general structure in place (which I am still developing), I can then start practicing each phase of the interaction to lock it in.

My desire to memorize more gambits and responses to force specific outcomes has been partly inspired by "The Game" which I started reading a couple of days ago. I've relied so much on natural charm to date (which has been good for getting dates from daygame) but which has been a failure in nightgame. Seeing how far Style got with them was amazing to read. The book in general is amazing, like reading a legend.

So, knowing the phase you are in and having an arsenal of tools to work with in that phase. Work in progress.

Last night, I was also better at not acting too impressed with what the girls told me. One told me she owned her own studio. Instead of saying "wow" I immediately asked her why and within a minute found out she had gone into business, didn't like it because of the bias against women and so thought "screw it, I'm going to do my own thing". Chase mentioned somewhere that skilled conversationalists are good at extracting the most information out of people with the least amount of effort. This is a goal of mine conversation wise.

The Conversationalist

Conversation and the conversationalist: probably one of the most under-discussed topics in the social arts. What a pity. Conversation is part of the backbone upon which everything related to socializing is built upon, but in the 21st century that’s almost forgotten. You might go so far as to say...

www.girlschase.com

2. Her state (calibrating yourself to her)

Inspired by this article, I am now starting to become aware of where I lie on the spectrum of interest with girl using the ACER (Aloof, Compliant, Enthusiastic, Rude) model.

Being a Challenge to Women (& REALLY Turning Them On)

Back on the article about gym pickup, The Tool (one of our forum members as well) commented in asking about ways he could meet girls in the gym as a member of the staff, without overstepping professional boundaries: “It was 8 am and this girl wanted to Tan and she had another hour before she...

www.girlschase.com

After reading the article and going out last night, I was seeing the interactions in an entirely new light, for instance:

Set 1:
Waiting for the tram, opened a cute brunette asking what she was getting up to. She hooked immediately. When the tram came I got on, sat down and she took the seat opposite me. I recognized that she was neither in autorejection and also saw me as a challenge. I was right where I wanted to be. So I rode that interaction and number closed. Probably could have qualified/screened more. She's responding to my texts.

Set 2: Approached a two set of pretty young looking girls sitting down. Chit chatted and joked around with them, gave them recommendations for clubs to go dance in the city since they were visiting. Two more of their friends came while I was talking. They were a bit drunk but friendly, one on the end in particular, a blonde, started saying that I should come with them to the place I'd recommended. There were four of them so we wouldn't have fit in the uber, I didn't think it was worth it and also I didn't want to dance - I declined saying that we were going to stick around here - and two minutes later the blonde who said I should come there too was mouthing off at me - "Why are you still here?" "Leave". Before reading the article this would have freaked me out and I would have bailed, but because I recognized it as autorejection I had fun with it, saying "Nah, you girls totally want me to stay" with a smile, saying it was cute. But that made her angrier. I forgot that when she is in autorejection, it's better to be authentic and chill and that chase frames are better used when she doesn't think you're much of a challenge. In retrospect, I'm thinking I should have tried isolating her "Hey X, there's something I want to tell you", and when alone gone into a spiel about how I thought they were actually cool. Maybe? I don't know.

Set 3:

Me and a wing approached a four set. He took the prettiest brunette, I started talking to the nice looking blonde, two of the overweight friends were there talking amongst themselves. One of the overweight friends left which made things awkward. My target started trying to get me to talk to her (the overweight friend) instead. So obviously, I was not coming across as much of a challenge. I started teasing her more, deep diving. Then I attempted to isolate "Hey Y, there's something really important I have to tell you". She actually complied and came over, but then when I said I would tell her but wanted to chat a bit more first, she got cold feet and said she wanted her (the overweight friend) to be there too so walked back.

Set 4:

Very pretty tall girl with another girlfriend and a guy. At the end of the night, approached direct. The guy admired the balls but I wasn't enough of a challenge. It was too much of a friendly interaction in which I was talking to them all (the guy was sort of dominating the conversation a bit) and so I didn't isolate. Didn't qualify or screen but went for the number close. It was weak, and I have had no response as expected. How could I have become more of a challenge. Well, I could have deep dived but her friends were there, could have chase framed but she didn't give me too many opportunities to. The other option was compliance compliance compliance. Ding ding ding.

Compliance and compliance tests. For these girls who don't think I'm much of a challenge (the majority of hot girls I approach at night it seems) I need to focus more on compliance.

This could be asking her to show me something that she is wearing, telling her to come with me because "there's something really important I have to tell you" as I attempted to do last night, and so on.



This is all a lot to take in, so I need to focus on

3. Experimentation (Choosing a few things to work on and hammering them out)

For conversation, I've narrowed down a few routines which I want to practice (examples, Styles best friends test, Skills "who are you here with" response, the 5 lies game and so on).

I need to develop simple compliance tests now to practice. I already have one I can practice - "I have something very important to tell you" and then isolating her. But I need smaller ones to build up to if she refuses this request.

nice seeing u tram sets

don’t forget u can also approach girls inside of trams and trains tho they can be nerve racking at first. Go indirect because it will be calibrated

Im going to hop on these sets tmrw since i just got kicked out just then from the big af mall that i typically go to haha... ; - ;

 

[Beam]

nice seeing u tram sets

don’t forget u can also approach girls inside of trams and trains tho they can be nerve racking at first. Go indirect because it will be calibrated

Im going to hop on these sets tmrw since i just got kicked out just then from the big af mall that i typically go to haha... ; - ;

Hey man, yeah I've done that a couple of times (indirect, it's too stressful going direct) and you're right, it was pretty nerve wracking at first!

Nice, let me know how you go. Sucks that you got kicked out but like I said in the chat, wear it like a badge of honour, you trooper

 

[Velasco]

Approached a two set of pretty young looking girls sitting down. Chit chatted and joked around with them, gave them recommendations for clubs to go dance in the city since they were visiting. Two more of their friends came while I was talking. They were a bit drunk but friendly, one on the end in particular, a blonde, started saying that I should come with them to the place I'd recommended

Openers - One of the goals of the openers is to "Buy time" bonus another lame lay report.

first what does buy time means: buy time To stall or delay in order to gain more time to do something. A noun, pronoun, or reflexive pronoun can be used between "buy" and "time," as can words like "more" and "some."I'm so sorry I'm running late to the party, but I'm almost there now—buy me...

www.skilledseducer.com

There were four of them so we wouldn't have fit in the uber

Have the girl you want sit on your lap. I've field tested this in cabs tho. Not sure if the uber driver would be a dick about it. Sometimes you'll meet a cool driver that doesnt care how many people hop in his car. Sometimes they'll be like "I'm only supposed to pick up 2 persons. And the girls are forced to let you go even tho they wanted you to come with them. Getting out and reordering another uber with 3 drivers is just a massive inconvenience. Especially since ur still a stranger.

she got cold feet and said she wanted her (the overweight friend) to be there too so walked back

Wasnt interested.

Set 4: ask the girl your interested in, "how do you guys know each other?" To find out the dynamic (they just met that guy, hes their long time friend, he's your targets bf, hes the other girl's bf). So your can better tailor your strategy to the situation.

 

[Beam]

FR 17/4/21

TL: DR

Still an AFC in night game but learning, slowly

The main set (happened towards the end of the night, 30 minutes before close)

This one was cringe. Approached a two set of tall black haired women standing at the bar looking at the dancefloor and commented on their black outfits (I was wearing a black leather jacket and pants so made some comment about having found my tribe). The model looking one on the left hooked immediately, asking me personal questions, asking me where I lived. I knew she was DTF It was so unexpected that I was at a loss of words and started boring her with niceguy conversation. My wing came in to chat with her friend but he wasn't doing well either. She was trying to make it easy but it sputtered and I didn't move the convo forward. I had tried isolating her (it's too loud here, let's go somewhere quieter to chat) while she was still warm, but she refused saying she wanted to get a birthday drink for her friend first. The whole time I was in my head, the whole time I was thinking how much I was boring her and got in my head. We went to the bar, were next to each other while I ordered a drink. Got a bit of preselection - a cute girl came up to us by the bar and chatted for a small while, treating us like a pair of celebrities. But it sputtered out and 5 minutes later she said she was going to her friend. Didn't think to try to find that cute girl who'd come up to us before, it would have been hard to find her.

Soon after I saw her talking to another dude, and her friend talking to that guys friend. The guy successfully isolated them to the quiet area out the back, I passed them as they were walking past in an attempt to reengage but she just stared at me blankly and walked past. Ow.

Later after the bar closed I saw the guy leaving with her in hand laughing, but her friend was there with an old dude (who my wings had said had been approaching left and right at the bar). Didn't seem like the friend was too enthusiastic about him so logistically I'm not sure what happened and if the dude ended up sleeping with her (since any number of factors with the dynamic of the friend there could have messed it up) but I dropped the ball hard. Missed an escalation window, couldn't take the conversation forward and bored her.

Two set (brunette and blonde)

Both sitting down, I opened with some niceguy opener about how me and my friend saw them there and had to come say something. They shittested mercilessly about it but I handled it well, saying something ridiculous like "Well this is my first time in the outside world after leaving my mums basement" which got a good laugh, since the way I was dressed and how confidently I said it meant it clearly wasn't true. Once I was in I was able to demonstrate attractive qualities, teasing them by not giving them a straight answer when they asked me about my job. Started cold reading the blonde on hers and it took a couple of tries, but eventually found out she was a designer. I asked her why she decided to get into that and she held up the glass and said "because everything needs to be designed" or something like that. Now here's where I should have started drilling deep to find out more about it, but instead I said something stupid about how I didn't believe her, that everything popped out of the ground 100 years ago. Cringe. Was trying to be a bit playful but she didn't see it that way - she then tapped her friend on the shoulder and said she needed to go to the "bathroom". When she left I remembered a line I'd read somewhere that said "don't believe what they've written about me in stall 3" again in an attempt to be funny. They left and didn't come back.

Other takeaways from last night (I did quite a few more approaches)

Tested isolating girls from groups by going up to them and saying "I have something very important to tell you". This worked and got them to come with me away from their friends, but then I said something like "and that is... you're cute" with a cheeky smile. Thought that'd get a laugh but it didn't work and things fizzled quickly after that. But it worked to isolate them. Also experimented with just tapping girls on the shoulder on the dance floor and motioning for them to come over to me, which worked. Easier than I thought. So now I need to focus on making what I say worthwhile after motioning them over with me.

Tried Styles "Best Friends" routine on two girls and they ate it up. Was pretty amazing seeing the same reaction that I read about in The Game.

Another important point - I got to bed at 3:40AM last night. Don't know how I can do this every Friday and Saturday while not writing off the rest of the weekend...

 

[Beam]

Something interesting happened today. Opened two women today, they both had boyfriends but were smiling, crossing their legs and clearly wanted to keep talking. I didn't persist much after this, but... it felt unnatural when I stopped the interaction. Like, I wanted to continue flirting with them but that nagging voice said to stop. I wonder how to turn off that internal chatter because now I'm really curious to see what would happen if I just ignored that voice after she told me she had a boyfriend to see how far I can actually push things.

 

[Beam]

LR: Hinge Cutie (21/4/21)

Matched with a cute red haired 24yo on Hinge last week. Sent a couple back and forth texts - she asked about something in my profile and I said it was an embarrassing story - and that if I told her she had to tell me one. She agreed, I told her mine and then she said if I wanted to hear hers I'd have to meet her for a drink. Keen.

We set up plans for Sunday - I wanted it to be near my house so I could go for the first date pull but she said that was a little far - I knew this was probably going to be a Day 2 based on previous experience. We met in the city, went for a drink, chatted and stayed close - a bit of light flirting, deep diving. I made her laugh easily. After two hours we ended it - I seeded the next date by talking about the great rooftop near my house and said we should check it out - she agreed. I also teased her about a personality game I wanted to play with her. There was no clumsy kiss at the end this time, I knew not to. We hugged, I let it linger for a bit, and then left.

She texted me the next day (Monday) saying she had fun and saying she was keen to meet up in the suburb I live in to check out the rooftop. I suggested Wednesday and she agreed.

We met at my usual bar - which was empty. Did some more deep diving, joking around, showed her things on my phone as an excuse to get closer. **I would like to develop gambits which involve showing her something on my phone so I can do this consistently**. She brought up the personality test and I told her we'd play it later. Bit of sexual humour when she mentioned how she liked "beach days" and I misheard it as "BJs" - gave her a knowing look and she laughed. I teased her about looking all innocent but knowing there was a fire inside her. I felt myself getting a bit drunk and slurry off just one cocktail (I hadn't eaten) so slowed down a bit since I was starting to lose focus and the conversation was stunting a bit because of it - she would always reengage when there was silence. We talked about comedy and she mentioned an act she really loved who had a Netflix show. I took the opportunity to seed the pull by saying I wanted to check the show out at some point.

We changed venue to the bar with the cool rooftop - but turns out they had turned off the lights up there (they were doing renovations because less people were going due to the cold weather which has started coming around). It was freezing. She had a jacket but I didn’t and was wearing a shirt and freezing my titties off.

We went downstairs to grab a seat, she was sitting opposite me. I was shivering and she suggested grabbing a drink to warm me up. When we were at the bar we cosied up to eachother and I joked about it . "Damn me for trying to look all sexy showing off my hot bod". She almost doubled down laughing at this. When the card reader came out she rushed to pay for us both.

Grabbed our wines, went back to the seats but she sat opposite me again while I was on the bench. I confidently told her to "come over here to keep me warm" and she did with a smile. 1 minute later we were making out and she looked extremely pleased. I ended it. She brought up the personality test again and we played it - our good old friend The Cube. Hers was medium sized and pink, with a tame horse nearby, a ladder leaning against it and the storm far away. She asked me what mine was. I've been asked this a couple of times - I think the best option is to take what she has said and adjust yours accordingly, but with enough small variations that it isn't obviously the same as hers. So I said mine was fairly large, green, with a pony standing nearby doing it's own thing, a long ladder supporting the cube, and a storm far away.

There was a small lull in the conversation when I suddenly came out with a gem to keep the conversation going. Didn't realize how well it would steer the conversation towards sex - so well that I want to turn it into a gambit:

B: "Do you like to people watch?"

H: "Yes! I love people watching"

B: "Me too, it's so interesting.

H: "Have you seen anyone interesting here tonight?"

B: Looking around - "Not really. Everyone seems quite conventional and in groups. There aren't any cool people around - usually the most interesting people are the ones on their own - they're the ones who have probably seen a lot of shit"

H: "Agreed!"

B: "Have you ever gone up to someone you've been interested in to talk while doing it"

H: "Only if I’m with my friends! I'm too scared too otherwise. Also, I'm a woman, and it's more dangerous being a woman. Actually! I would approach a woman"

B: "What if she had, like, knives. And a gun"

H: "Then no, hahaha"

B: "I would. I'd love to go up to her - that would make her ten times more interesting"

H: "If you're into that sort of thing, haha"

B: “Oh yeah, nothing turns me on more. You just know she’d probably be really freaky in the sack”

H: “Hahaha she probably would”

B: “You ever walk look around at people in public and wonder what they’d be like in bed?”

H: “All the time. Like, with everyone”

B: ribbing her about this “Everyone? Even old gross fat dudes?”

H: “HAHAHA, noooo”

B: “Hey, everyone has their fantasies. Do you have any?”

Note: I was saying this very casually, matter of factly and with conviction. Which is important. I’ve always struggled with sex talk because to me it always seems like I’m going to come across as too obvious, and she’ll see right through it as an obvious attempt to try to turn her on. But here I was speaking so casually that it felt right and natural. Pretty sure this is how Alek says to talk about It but I didn’t really get what that felt like until now.

H: “I do have a few, some that I am afraid to try”

B: “Afraid? Have there been some that you did try and later regretted it later?

H: “Yeah”

She talked about being curious about women, and so once she kissed her friend, but immediately realized she didn’t like it. We then discussed sexual orientation and how fluid it could be. I told her how sometimes I would get tingles talking to exceptionally good looking and charismatic guys and consider what it would be like, but then immediately the thought of doing anything sexual with them would turn me off immediately. She nodded in agreement.

I was winging this whole conversation. So I probably made some mistakes by bringing up sexual regrets– since this probably isn’t a topic conducive to seduction (I'm guessing you don’t want her thinking about sexual regret otherwise she might think twice about going home with you - could be wrong)

H: “Do you have any?”

B: “Yeah. An ex flame of mine was curious about pegging, and she made me curious. So we tried it, and I realized I didn’t really like it”

H: “Why”

B: “I don’t know, maybe it was a dominant/submissive thing. I like being more dominant, and not in a submissive position”

I've never been pegged so this was just a bit of bullshitting. But she went a bit quite. I think she was getting turned on.

H: “Oh”

B: “Sexuality is really quite interesting. All aspects of it. And I feel it’s often so repressed”

H: “I agree 100%!”

I don’t remember exactly what I said after this but I was amazed at myself for how smooth it all was.

Not long after that discussion I went for the pull.

B: “Hey, that comedy show you mentioned on Netflix, want to go watch it?”

There was no hesitation. She responded “Sure” enthusiastically.

Went back to my house, we sat on the couch, I was having a hard time bringing up the show when she said “We don’t have to watch it”.

We started making out, then headed upstairs to my room.

Now I remember Velasco and Skills saying to go to the bathroom first before making out, but I genuinely needed to take a piss now when I hadn’t before. But I hadn't made out with her in my room yet which was a plus. I was still a little stressed though but I ran to the bathroom and was in and out in a minute to not leave her too long. She went after me as well.

Small note – After the fiasco with HBDancer, I had modified my beautiful warm lamp so I could turn it on remotely, and placed the remote right by the entrance to my room above the light switch – ensuring I would never forget again.

She came back, I pushed her against the door, we made out, threw her on the bed, ate her out (not sure if she came from this, I don’t think so). She went down on me. I think I'm a bit too obsessed with this site because the first thought that came to my mind when she went down on me was "Cool, at least an LR-" and then when I entered her it was "Fuck yeah, LR!!". Fucking lol. Anyway I did her missionary and she came at least three times in like 10 minutes (she was gasping and telling me when she was about to come). She started getting loud and biting on the pillow to stop herself. It was beautiful to watch. When she told me she was going to come the third time I said “Good girl” and she lost it.

After this we tried doing doggy but I couldn’t get it in properly and then it started going limp. We tried a couple more times, but then decided to call it. She started licking my face and I jerked myself off. I should have kept trying.

Afterwards I asked her about her fantasies again. She told me she was really curious about BDSM. I told her I wanted to have riskier sex in public places – she shared some of her related experiences and I told her about one of mine from a few years ago (where I got head in a tent from a girl on our tour right near my sisters tent (on a family holiday), and when my sister later found out about it she became all submissive and feminine around me which was a mindfuck. My sister didn’t see me in that light and so it completely changed her opinion of me since that girl was hot). It was fun sharing these experiences.

It started getting late so she left so I could get up early for work the next morning.

Awesome positive experience. I’d like to keep seeing her. There was another girl I was supposed to go on a date with right near my house today (girl I number closed on the tram on Friday) but she got sick so couldn't make it. Shame, would have been nice to have back to back lays.

 

[foggy]

nice one beam

Didn't realize how well it would steer the conversation towards sex - so well that I want to turn it into a gambit

sounds like you were hitting on some magic with the sex talk... is amazing when that happens.

one way you could steer the gambit is to go into a cold read about what the people in the venue are like in bed. like you could point to a couple nearby and describe their sex life to her.

Cool, at least an LR-" and then when I entered her it was "Fuck yeah, LR!!".

I DO THE SAME LOL...

 

[Beam]

one way you could steer the gambit is to go into a cold read about what the people in the venue are like in bed. like you could point to a couple nearby and describe their sex life to her.

I like it!

I DO THE SAME LOL...

In The Game and Tony Ds book they mention the same thing, this is a pretty common thing in the community it seems hahaha

 

[Beam]

Didn't go out Friday and Saturday this weekend due to family and friend commitments on both days/nights (I mean, I could have kept going afterwards but I would have absolutely destroyed myself, I needed the sleep badly). I still felt antsy and guilty about not going out though. Honestly, I know you can't let this stuff take over your life but hanging out with my family and old friends feels like an obligation now. And more and more I find that I have hardly anything in common with them - the only things are shared memories from the past. Maybe this is a symptom of not having "made it". The fact that I am not fully satisfied with my dating life is seeping in to my interactions with them, making me not fully present, making me think about women instead of being in the present moment. They notice this and ask me if I'm ok. It's hard to switch off.