Gameboy's Journal

[gameboy]

TLDR: 2 approaches, a 2 set and a 3 set. First set hooked easily, but I wasn't feeling it. The second set ignored me.

Man, what a day. I didn't get much sleep last night and am more tired than usual. I'm proud to have done 2 approaches nonetheless. What's more, I got approached myself, by no less than 3 guys. God damn I must be a gay magnet or something.

FIRST APPROACH: 2 SET

I arrived at the beach and laid down right next to the water. There were 2 topless girls right above me, and 2 girls in bikini speaking my native language to the right. None were super hot but they were okay looking. And I like to be surrounded by girls

The topless girls left soon. I went for a quick swim as it was super hot. As I came back, one of the girls to my right went into the water. I checked out the other one and she had nice big boobs, so I decided to open situationally. I think I said something like "It's nice in the water" and we got chatting. Turns out they are from a city really close to my home town. Visiting here for a week or so. When the other girl came back from the water I chatted with both of them for a bit. Gave them some recommendations what to visit and such. I wasn't really interested romantically, it was more of a socializing kind of vibe, or warmup if you will. Both of them had what I call duck lips, with silicone in there.

I noticed a muscular, bearded, kind of scary looking tattooed guy had posted himself right were the topless girls sat before. At first I didn't think he was gay, but then I heard him talking on the phone in a super feminine voice. I looked at him casually. He was wearing black eye liner and had his fingernails painted red. Seriously.

Since I wasn't feeling it with the girls either, I decided it was time to get out of there. Packed my stuff and walked along the beach for a bit. While walking I got opened by no less than two guys in short order. One said "Hey bro, want some?" offering me his bottle of water. I said no and walked on. Seconds after, another guy came up to me and asked if I had some marihuana. I didn't, and I told him. Ok maybe this one was legit looking for dope and not gay. Let's give him the benefit of the doubt.

YOUNG 2-SET, AA

Walked a bit more, and saw one girl in a 2-set I really liked. Unfortunately she looked really young. But she was hot, black hair piled up, tanned body, tight figure and nice boobs as I like it. Her friend was a fatty and not hot. But both had cute faces, as in nice. Just looked like genuinely nice girls.

I chickened out on the approach, because of the age difference. I really have a problem with girls that look too young. I don't think they were under age, but even if they're like 20 or so... what would we even talk about?

I thought about what to say to them for a long while, but couldn't think of anything. In the end I should have just gone indirect. I know I need to try going direct at some point... but I was overthinking it in this case.

In hindsight, I could just have told them that their scooter looked cool (they had an electric scooter with them with blue parts and I really liked it). Or when I overheard their conversation, commented on that. At one point the girl I found hot said "I want to be with someone that treats me well." All I could think of at the moment was to say "I'll treat you well!" but it seemed too blatant for a total stranger to say that. Maybe if I'd have said something like "That's the most important thing in a relationship!" and if they seemed receptive maybe talk a bit about why my last relationship went south, and take it form there.

Anyway, I chickened out on that set. In the end they left when the sun went down.

3 SET OF MODELS

I walked around a bit more and came across three girls one of which I thought looked awesome. The thing was, all 3 of them were taller than me. They could easily have been a group of 3 models. All had very long hair and they were dressed stylish for the beach. The one I liked was tanned, slim, and when I first saw her she threw her hair forward - it was very long, and dark. Then threw it back, like girls sometimes do. A bit like headbanging, but just once. Maybe I could call it the "single headbang"?

I walked over to them, thinking "I just gotta talk to these girls" even though they're all taller. I had a whole routine laid out in my head that I was going to try on them. It went like "Hey where are you girls from?" if they said "from here" I'd say "So how come you're all taller than me? I'm from X country and I'm smaller than all of you!" and get a laugh. That was all I wanted. I didn't have any illusions of hooking up with a tall girl from a 3 set of models doing cold approach, just wanted to chat with them for a sec and have a laugh.

Well, when I reached them they asked another girl to take a photo of them. I thought screw it, and walked on. Plan was to open them when they were done. But after the photo, they walked the other direction, down to the sea. So I followed them, and when I got close enough said in a loud voice "Hey where are you girls from?"

One of the girls looked at me out of the corner of her eye, made what I thought was a slightly disgusted face, then ignored me and turned back to her 2 friends. The other 2, I'm not sure they even noticed me. If they did, I didn't see a reaction. So much for getting rejected!

It stung, but I know it was good that I tried. When I walked away, I saw a guy sitting under a palm tree with a girl. The guy seemed to smirk at me knowingly, and it looked like he had been watching and realized what was going on. I felt like he was thinking "Sucks, but brave try amigo"

GETTING OPENED BY...

Guess who opened me next?

I went over to grab my bike and ride around a bit. Who's standing right there? Yep, red fingernail guy. He actually asked me, in broken English... "What language were you speaking before down there? Was it X?"

I said "Yes, X", nodded, then turned around and rode off. I didn't want to be as rude as the maybe-model-girl. At least give the guy an answer and then show him I'm not interested.

In a way it's interesting that all these guys open me recently, because it makes me see how it is to be on the receiving end of an approach.

@StrayDog:

Yes, trying direct openers is very much on my to-do list. I had "Are you single" in my mind, but also openers like "Hey I saw you from over there and thought you were cute" or indirect-direct. Also, I still want to try what Chase suggested, asking for the favorite color and when she asks why, tell her I find her interesting and want to meet her.

Gotta do all of those at some point! But at the moment, my main priority is to open at all. Like with the cute young girl I saw today and got AA... if I had just said anything at all, would have been way better than to sit there trying to figure out the perfect opener, and being paralized as a result.

 

[AspiringStoic]

@gameboy

Hey. I just wanted to say a couple of things that popped up in my head. I am no expert. But I was in a similar position when I started approaching late last year.

From what I see you have AA, but yet you are extremely selective in the girls you open. You describe in quite some detail about the attractiveness of every girl you open. Also, you kind of put a disclaimer out in your descriptions when you feel like you are approaching anyone that you don't find to be exactly your type or your desired attraction level.

I kind of did the same too in the very beginning. But then somone told me this and I am kind of paraphrasing here.

"Listen you have AA, you are not comfortable opening, you have to first get comfortable opening. You have to feel those sensations and that UNCERTAINTY you feel right before each open, when you don't know how the person is going to react.

You need to get comfortable handling ANY KIND of reaction you get when you open a stranger.

The ones that ignore you, the ones that look your way and then turn and walk away, the ones who give you a muted, neutral response, the ones that respond but are awkward about it, the ones that just give one word replies, the ones that are polite but still don't want to have an interaction and the ones that are happy to interact etc

You need to experience all these reactions over and over again till you become comfortable and CONFIDENT that you can HANDLE ALL OF THESE REACTIONS. So don't focus so much on the attractiveness of the girl, get this massive experience under your belt"

This is what he told me. For context this is a guy I know personally. He is not that amazing at game. But he literally CAN OPEN ANYONE! I am not kidding. And he gets great results just by volume.

He got this skill because he worked as a salesman at a kiosk in a large shopping mall for 2-3 years cold approaching people who walk by and selling them mobile phone cases etc. He told me he used to literally "open" 10 people sometimes in under 5 minutes and sometimes all of them would walk past ignoring him.

Of course its sales, so not like we should literally approach like that for Game. But he said that built an extremely thick skin for him. In one work shift of 6 hours at the mall, he would be ignored or "rejected" literally hundreds of times. He realized emotionally on a deep level that its nothing personal. And he developed the capacity to handle any kind of reaction.

When he saw me struggling with AA and I told him I do 2-4 opens everyday. He laughed at that and told me to open a minimum of 10 per day.

Again not 10 attractive women or 10 big approaches that are planned. But just open 10 women of any age or attractiveness. Open with a compliment on their shoes, clothes, sunglasses or a cold read like "Are you a lawyer or are you from xyz city or country etc?" He said I would rather you open 8 unattractive women and 2 attractive ones in a day than walk around for a long time and end up opening just 2 attractive women.

He was like you are facing all the sensations that come before opening and the reactions that come after only 2 times whereas you could have gotten 10 such experiences in a day.

This was really good advice for me. I am trying to implement it. I am still not able to open10 everyday consistently but I am a lot closer to it. And the mentality shift has been really helpful. I don't worry about attractiveness of the girl at all for the first 5-6 ones everyday.

That was longer than I intended to write lol. But maybe its useful to you.

 

[gameboy]

@AspiringStoic, thanks for your feedback! It really resonates. I believe my AA is getting better but I'm still quite picky about who I open.

Definitely going to try and integrate your advice in my next outings

 

[gameboy]

Did I say AA is getting better? Haha.

Actually, it's a renewed struggle every day.

Yesterday I didn't approach, had too many other things on my mind. Today I decided to get at least one warmup approach done after the morning coffee. Saw quite a few HBs running around, but AA struck once again. Said hello to a few girls walking by, but didn't get any reactions except a quick look or two. Then I saw a girl standing outside a shop checking her phone, so I walked up to her and asked her her favorite color. She said "no english" (I wasn't talking in English) so I thought she didn't understand me. Asked again this time in English, she said "I don't know".

I thanked her and moved on. Planning to head out in the afternoon again. Let's see how it goes.

 

[AspiringStoic]

Did I say AA is getting better? Haha.

Actually, it's a renewed struggle every day.

Yesterday I didn't approach, had too many other things on my mind. Today I decided to get at least one warmup approach done after the morning coffee. Saw quite a few HBs running around, but AA struck once again. Said hello to a few girls walking by, but didn't get any reactions except a quick look or two. Then I saw a girl standing outside a shop checking her phone, so I walked up to her and asked her her favorite color. She said "no english" (I wasn't talking in English) so I thought she didn't understand me. Asked again this time in English, she said "I don't know".

I thanked her and moved on. Planning to head out in the afternoon again. Let's see how it goes.

Haha. I experience this too. I am trying to make sure to go out everyday. I realized something however great a day you have today, the next day you start back at zero social momentum. Sometimes its easier on certain days and sometimes for no reason it seems a lot tougher. I think more than anything approaching has made me so hyper aware of even the smallest mood fluctuations I have.

But its great that you are out there trying everyday as well.

 

[AspiringStoic]

@gameboy

By the way, have you tried having a dedicated session for 1-2 hours where you are just focused on approaching?

I see you do your approaches scattered throughout the day. Maybe that makes it harder!? I know at least for me its way harder to do 1 approach here then go swim and do another there etc. I always cut out a period of time as my "approaching session". As beginners I think that might be better for us.

 

[gameboy]

I think more than anything approaching has made me so hyper aware of even the smallest mood fluctuations I have.

That's a very good insight! But it works both ways. I found doing an approach, however simple, also has the power to lift my mood incredibly.

By the way, have you tried having a dedicated session for 1-2 hours where you are just focused on approaching?

Sure! Of course it's easier once you're in the flow.

Yesterday afternoon I did just one more approach, saw 2 cute but slightly fat girls walk by while unlocking my bike. Since they looked foreign I asked one of them in English for her favorite color and she answered "Greeeen" (she drew it out like that). I said "Finally a green one! Thank you!" and she laughed but both kept walking.

It was just this super playful vibe, I loved it. It put a big smile on my face. It's impressive how you can alter your own mood just by taking a simple - yet slightly scary - action. And the reaction I got gave me a really good energy.

Even if the reaction is negative/rejection, it may sting but it makes you feel good afterwards regardless.

Anyway... Later I met up with some friends to watch the footy. There were girls in the venue, but they all looked super young and no real hotties. Cute to look at, but I preferred to catch up with my buddies. Had a fun night, but today slightly hung over...

 

[gameboy]

What a crappy day. Having a headache all day, I'm not sure if it's a hangover or something else. Because I really drank very little acohol. Just can't tolerate it anymore. Let's hope tomorrow will be better.

Because I felt like shit, I didn't approach all day. Which in turn made me feel even worse because I did see a few cuties around.

When it was almost dark, I opted to push my bike on the way home instead of ride it, to get a chance to approach at least 1 girl before calling it a day. I'm starting to get a bit bored of the favorite color opener (did I just hear the forum breathe a sigh of relief?!), so I went for a direct compliment.

After walking for quite some time, at last I saw a single girl in a lovely tight red dress that hugged her curves. She was coming frontally toward me, phone in hand (of course) and apparently speaking into it, voice message style. When I was close enough I turned toward her and said: "Hello! I like your dress! It's very pretty." She gave me a slight smile, (I think), and said thanks. Kept walking though.

That did lift my mood a bit. Felt good to try something different, and get a positive reaction.

 

[gameboy]

So I actually got sick and spent all of Sunday in bed, yesterday was better but still felt quite wonky.

Not sure if I'm in the right state to go back to approaching already, but let's see what the afternoon brings.

 

[gameboy]

TLDR: 2 favorite color approaches, then wanted to do a compliment to a girl in a 2F set but got AA

My energy is still a bit lower than normal today so I guess I'm still recovering from the sickness. But I went out regardless since it was a nice hot day.

1st approach: A slightly fat girl that I didn't find attractive but she was one of the first single girls I saw in the day and I wanted to get a warmup approach done. Asked her favorite color, she said blue, I said thanks. Easy peasy.

2nd one: Saw a girl from behind that I found hot. She was wearing a short skirt I think and I really liked her legs and overall body shape. Once I got close though, I got a strong intuition that this one doesn't want to talk to me. I approached anyway, just for my own amusement basically. I asked politely, "Excuse me, can you tell me your favorite color please?" She looked at me and said "No." I think this was the most direct rejection I got so far with this question. (A cultural thing here, it's almost rude to directly say "No" to someone. It's considered more polite to say "I don't know" or something evasive.)

It didn't really sting, I felt good I had approached a girl I found hot. I prefer them being direct and letting me know if they're not interested.

Also, interesting how my intuition was on point.

Afterwards, I went to the beach, but didn't see any single girls there that I wanted to meet. On the way back, came across a girl in a 2F-set that was wearing a white transparent dress and heels. She looked like she was going to a wedding or something, however her friend was wearing jeans so probably something else.

The girl with the dress was taller than me with her heels, but only slightly. Her legs looked gorgeous from behind through that semi-transparent dress. Of course I stared at her ass too but it wasn't as transparent there... or was it? These things play tricks on your mind, lol. Anyway, she had a lovely shape.

I wanted to compliment her on the dress, but couldn't. She was in a 2-set, so it was harder than approaching a single girl. Or maybe I spent too much time walking behind her enjoying the view, which made it more awkward to suddenly get in front of her and approach.

 

[Casanova Newhouse]

Give yourself mad props for approaching despite your intuition. And it didn't sting? That's major progress my friend. I'm proud of you.

Chances are she was later thinking to herself, "Why was I so mean to that nice man?"

 

[AspiringStoic]

TLDR: 2 favorite color approaches, then wanted to do a compliment to a girl in a 2F set but got AA

My energy is still a bit lower than normal today so I guess I'm still recovering from the sickness. But I went out regardless since it was a nice hot day.

1st approach: A slightly fat girl that I didn't find attractive but she was one of the first single girls I saw in the day and I wanted to get a warmup approach done. Asked her favorite color, she said blue, I said thanks. Easy peasy.

2nd one: Saw a girl from behind that I found hot. She was wearing a short skirt I think and I really liked her legs and overall body shape. Once I got close though, I got a strong intuition that this one doesn't want to talk to me. I approached anyway, just for my own amusement basically. I asked politely, "Excuse me, can you tell me your favorite color please?" She looked at me and said "No." I think this was the most direct rejection I got so far with this question. (A cultural thing here, it's almost rude to directly say "No" to someone. It's considered more polite to say "I don't know" or something evasive.)

It didn't really sting, I felt good I had approached a girl I found hot. I prefer them being direct and letting me know if they're not interested.

Also, interesting how my intuition was on point.

Afterwards, I went to the beach, but didn't see any single girls there that I wanted to meet. On the way back, came across a girl in a 2F-set that was wearing a white transparent dress and heels. She looked like she was going to a wedding or something, however her friend was wearing jeans so probably something else.

The girl with the dress was taller than me with her heels, but only slightly. Her legs looked gorgeous from behind through that semi-transparent dress. Of course I stared at her ass too but it wasn't as transparent there... or was it? These things play tricks on your mind, lol. Anyway, she had a lovely shape.

I wanted to compliment her on the dress, but couldn't. She was in a 2-set, so it was harder than approaching a single girl. Or maybe I spent too much time walking behind her enjoying the view, which made it more awkward to suddenly get in front of her and approach.

Great catch that it did not sting. I have had more experienced guys tell me that sometimes our "growth" in this can be internal for a while before we see it in terms of external results. A brush off or rejection stinging less or not stinging is a great sign of growth of internals I guess.

I am also looking to do more direct opens/compliments. Seems like you are too. Exciting times ahead!

 

[bgwh]

Just gotta say you journal inspired me, and had a nice run today. Specifically what inspired me was how you were fine with just doing hellos until it went further than that. I think this is the approach we should all use. The industry is too full of loud guys who "went from zero straight to big leaps" and will mock you if you have to do smaller steps, which honestly reeks of ego. But in the end, most people have to micro-step it. I don't care if my first steps sound cool, it's about the end result. Wish I had discovered micro-stepping 20 years ago.

 

[gameboy]

Glad I could inspire you! This really means a lot to me.

I'm still not seeing the results I want from women, and I haven't hooked a cool girl in far too long. But it's awesome to know that what I'm doing and writing about is inspiring others to take action!

Even if I never were to get any good at seduction, this means I've already achieved something meaningful

 

[bgwh]

Glad I could inspire you! This really means a lot to me.

I'm still not seeing the results I want from women, and I haven't hooked a cool girl in far too long. But it's awesome to know that what I'm doing and writing about is inspiring others to take action!

Even if I never were to get any good at seduction, this means I've already achieved something meaningful

Honestly, I think at our age the model of hooking girls and building attraction and trying to pick them up might not be ideal. I'm sure there are guys who can pickup girls from daygame at our age. But personally I think it makes more sense to go for something closer to status/social-circle-game and use daygame as a way to funnel girls into that. That's how I'm using it.

If an interaction turns into a pickup (like I notice the girl is horny) i might suggest an insta date and try to escalate. But that's not my goal. I see cold pickup as an accidental bonus if and when it happens. My goal is to funnel them into my social circle, and convert from there.

 

[gameboy]

Honestly, I think at our age the model of hooking girls and building attraction and trying to pick them up might not be ideal. I'm sure there are guys who can pickup girls from daygame at our age. But personally I think it makes more sense to go for something closer to status/social-circle-game and use daygame as a way to funnel girls into that. That's how I'm using it.

If an interaction turns into a pickup (like I notice the girl is horny) i might suggest an insta date and try to escalate. But that's not my goal. I see cold pickup as an accidental bonus if and when it happens. My goal is to funnel them into my social circle, and convert from there.

That's an interesting angle. I've thought about something similar too at some point, but I don't think I've ever written about it here.

 

[gameboy]

Life threw me a curve ball and I got a nasty herpes beakout around the lips. No way I'm approaching with that, so I guess I'll be taking a forced break for a while.

Kind of depressing, just as I was starting to go more direct. But such is life, 2 steps forward one step back.

 

[Casanova Newhouse]

Feel your pain brother - I still have a bit of disfigurement from my recent cancer excision and it makes me painfully self-aware. It's getting better though. Maybe in the meantime you can read up on all the great articles on ChaseGirls.com. Get mentally prepared to take a big leap forward.

 

[Casanova Newhouse]

Honestly, I think at our age the model of hooking girls and building attraction and trying to pick them up might not be ideal. I'm sure there are guys who can pickup girls from daygame at our age. But personally I think it makes more sense to go for something closer to status/social-circle-game and use daygame as a way to funnel girls into that. That's how I'm using it.

If an interaction turns into a pickup (like I notice the girl is horny) i might suggest an insta date and try to escalate. But that's not my goal. I see cold pickup as an accidental bonus if and when it happens. My goal is to funnel them into my social circle, and convert from there.

Love this approach ... I'm gradually building back up my social circle since the pandemic. Why not build it up with cuties? I remember reading (Malcolm Gladwell?) about a man who was crushing hard on a girl, so he organized an event around an author he knew she read. She showed up and he had ready-made social proof and a great head-start with shared interests. Happily married for years now.

 

[Chase]

@gameboy,

Glad to see you out still approaching. Also branching out more with the types of openers you're making and the kinds of approaches you attempt.

You know what they say about the tortoise and the hare... slow and steady wins the race!

Life threw me a curve ball and I got a nasty herpes beakout around the lips. No way I'm approaching with that, so I guess I'll be taking a forced break for a while.

Kind of depressing, just as I was starting to go more direct. But such is life, 2 steps forward one step back.

If you weren't struggling so much with AA, I would challenge you to go out and make your approaches regardless and see if you can even notice a difference.

Just personally I have been repeatedly surprised at girls not seeming to care about a.) my hair being absolutely wild and out of control, b.) me having a ginormous zit on my face or two, c.) me picking them up on the beach with pale skin and a hairy chest (supposedly uncool; we're all supposed to shave that aren't we?), keloid scars on my shoulders, etc.

There is still a part of me that thinks, "Nah, but girls have go to care about this, right?" and then you meet some new hot girl and really hit it off and take her contact details, then you go look in the mirror later and your hair is a disaster and you're like, "Holy crap, did I look like that the WHOLE TIME I was talking to her???" and you realize she didn't actually care about it at all. Maybe it even helped in some weird way (attainability)!

But yeah, fun challenge for when you're further along:

How hard can you challenge things you think would be dealbreakers with women and find out if they actually are or not?

Often leads to very surprising results!

For now, just keep doing what you're doing, and go at the pace you're able to go.

Cheers,
Chase