Last night was fucking epic as sheit!
My long term goal for seduction right now is reaching what I call REAL abundance with women by May. Real abundance being physical and mental abundance as opposed to just mental abundance (feeling like you have options and being able to relate to women as if you did have lots of options). Physical abundance being that I actually have the ability to go meet X amount of girls and bring one home in a relatively short period of time. Basically get sex consistently as opposed to sporadically.
After last night I know for SURE that I'm fucking close to reaching this. Once I get in the zone I can get girls to hook and be VERY open to me moving things forward fast with them I just need to iron out where I keep dropping the ball due to my action/inaction and iron out accordingly.
I will reach my goal by the end of April!
One thing I've found out about learning game is that it can be quite therapeutic at times in an odd way.
Times I've been quite anxious about shit and gone out and pimped it, I've come away feeling totally recharged and wondering why I was soo stressed to begin with.
I guess the lesson there is to be responsible for your own emotions, do the thing you know will elevate your state, thus drawing state from within and being emotionally self-reliant.
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I love the process of game when your not in a socialable mood to begin with, you feel like there's no way you'll get into that social charismatic state that you want and you just push each interaction a little further until the next thing your know you're yelling girls down, making out with them, and being completely spontaneous in your interactions.
Also had a couple of first for me last night: Had multiple girls open me due to my outfit (which to be honest wasn't overly spectacular but I had a burgundy blazer on and black chelsea boots similar to the first outfit of Darius's 6 sexy outfits article), got an erection in the club for first time in forever, and had a club makeout in under 5 minutes (not first club makeout but the 2nd one since I turned 21... had a few before I turned 21).
So as aforementioned in one of my last posts I'm doing a different system of breaking down my nights. Instead of listing out each specific interaction I'm just going to take the 3 most memorable interactions (probably the ones with the greatest lessons to takeaway), break them down and write down the lessons to take away from each along with a summary of the night.
1. First real hook
I had a lot of girls I talked to last night that hooked almost immediately that I probably could've moved forward to sex if I did everything right, but most had their friends take them away or I dropped the ball for two seconds and let things slide. Nonetheless I think I've definitely increased my consistency to hook girls, or at least upped my fundamentals to do so.
This girl was I think the 3rd or 4th girl I talked to. She was standing with her fat friend at a not soo packed bar and I opened her directly complementing her legs. I teased her mildly about how she must work out 7 times a weeks to achieve her body.
She didn't have enormous bamby eyes but they were their and she was attracted. She started having some flirtatious banter with some basic small talk mixed with deep diving.
My biggest mistake here was not capitalizing on the escalation window to move her. I never did move her I just kept talking to her and talking to her. My bullshit excuse in my head was that I couldn't move her because she was with her friend and I didn't want to leave her by herself (who gives a shit).
So I knew I should've moved her when I felt the escalation window arise but I didn't. She however still kept investing into the conversation.
About 12-15 minutes in the fat girls friend comes in and now she has a friend so I decide to try and move my girl.
I try and move her ("hey come over here to the other side of the bar real quick I want you to meet my [imaginary] friends") in which she declines, and tells me to bring my friends over to her. I keep persisting but I couldn't get her to budge (she keeps telling me that I'll come back to her and if I don't I'm missing out). I figure this is just a sign that she doesn't like me enough (I'm pretty damn positive I could've moved her at a high point of the conversation) anymore and has lost attraction, so I go off to find a new girl.
Lesson: Stick to the process and always hit the escalation window when it arises and hit it on a
high note.
Lesson: Focus on baby stepping interactions that aren't giving large investments of compliance. Instead of asking to move her all the way from one side of the bar to another just ask to move her 6 inches to the right. Then trade places (make up role play or stupid excuse to get her where I'm standing). Then after having 2 positive pieces of compliance to move just take her hand and move her to wherever you wanted to go originally.
Also learn babystepping for conversation and pulling as we'll note down in #3.
2. IBar girl This girl I found in a more rundown club/bar with 3 run down bars with an awesome vibe to it. The basic gist of the vibe in this interaction was the girl was super into me, and hooked instantly. The vibe got ratcheted up quickly and dipped low down quickly as well, got stale and then I made a last ditch effort to save it and she left me accordingly haha.
I met her, stuck my hand up to give her a lingering high five. She left her hand on mine and applied pressure (I can tell a sign of interest). I interlace my hands in hers and she asks me to dance. We dance and I set a role play that we're on a island in the middle of the world together and we're the only ones within thousands of miles of anyone else. I ask her what she would do to me and she says "10 seconds is not a long time for sex" (she wants to tear my clothes off).
The sexual tension is a bit high at this point, a little too high being that I don't want to makeout with her and risk losing her due to emotional cresting, but I can't really pull her at the moment... or could I?
Anyway, I go to try and move her to what I remember being a darker corner of the 3 bars. We go but she says she has to tell her friend (I hate that dumb bullshit of having to "stick together" "buddy system"). I go with her, she tells her friend, and another friend comes (friend #2) and says the guy she found is going to bar #2. We were in bar #3 and I wanted to go to bar #1.
We go with her newfound friend to bar #2 and it's not where I want to be particularly so I move her again to bar #1 to the corner I wanted to go originally. At this point things have gotten very logical and the emotions have crashed from where they were originally when I first met her.
Also the dark secluded corner I was taking her too turned out to be a little bright lit hall where the bathrooms were located. This is where I start losing my intention a bit and have trouble keeping the conversation headed in the right direction.
Now we're both logical and in a small talk/deep dive limbo awkwardly bumbling along even though we both could really give a shit. We were literally right next to the bathrooms and in the back of my mind I was thinking of pulling her into one just to see what her reaction might be but I didn't think her emotional state was correct to do so (logical, not much sexual tension).
Essentially I was lost for where to turn now and decided to throw my role play of 10 seconds to live kiss role play at her and see if she would comply.
I gave her my spiel and she peaced the fuck out immediately hahah. Oh well it's still fairly early?
Lesson: I guess the lesson here is to not let the sexual tension drop to such a low level and maintain it, via leadership.
If I could do this set over again I'd move her into the darker more secluded section of bar #3 on a couch or corner and escalate physically and risk not pulling her (maybe not the best idea but probably the most fun =) ) but release sexual tension. Then I'd try and seed the pull and take her home.
3. Failure to Lead :000!!!!!!
This one pisses me off to write up. I'm mad at myself for not being proactive and letting what happened here happen.
In this club I got really instate towards the end, super irreverent, and yelling girls down.
This girl passed by myself and this dude I met that was pretty cool. She yelled "NO DOn't!" as she passed by and assholishly yelled "YESSS!" at her as she passed. She noticed me and excitedly echoed back "YESS!!". I picked her up in the air and she got super excited and told me it was her birthday. We started dancing and she started grinding on me.
This girl wasn't super hot in the face in retrospect but my god she had a bumbly comfy ass.
I got tired of dancing on the dance floor and pick her up, and went to a shadier side of the club in a mostly unused walkway that connects the bathrooms to the dancefloor.
I make out with her, pull away, and expect her to leave but she sticks around and starts grinding on me. I get aroused and get an erection and become very horny.
Options are running through my mind as to how to pull her. She with one friend. I think they are staying at a hotel somewhat close by. Her friend found a guy to be with so I'm thinking we need to go "afterparty".
After some more grinding the club lights turn on and it is time to go. We go outside and I'm thinking it would be good to all go to a hotel or my house and afterparty it up. The guy with her friend seems bout it and my girl says she wants to keep the party going. I suggest afterparty at my house but it seems like too big of an investment from everyone and they decline. I try and suggest their hotel and the same thing. Now I'm at a loss for what to do, however I freeze up at this point while I try and think for options.
Freezing up was where I dropped the ball. Then the craziest thing happened and they were like lets go for food (A good valid option to remember if going to an afterparty is too big of an investment at the time.. babysteps remember?) and on the way over to food I dropped back behind the 3 of them for a second to say goodbye to my friend and then I caught back up to them and the guy that was originally with my girls friend was now holding my girls hand.
My girls friend comes up to me and tells me that the guy was really her boyfriend. I know she's lieing but what can I do at this point? I let them go into the restaurant and resolve to be more proactive for next time.
Lesson Be proactive and attentive to pulling girls home. Also lead more decisively, come up with backup go to options to throw out. I should've reslted control of this group and told them "hey we can either go to my friends awesome after party (my house lol) or go grab food". Or inquire as to if they'd come home, when they rejected the notion then babystep it by saying "lets go grab some food/drink somewhere else! The night must not end" and basically keep the party going in the group and lead to a better place.
If I could do this interaction over again I would have taken control of the group. Tried to push for the afterparty and if unsuccessful lead the group to continuing to have fun and grab a food/drink elsewhere, then try and get over to their place.
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Overall Summary
Overall I would say I pushed it fairly hard last night. I approached a good 15-20 girls, I was very physical with most the girls I met, and I pushed almost all the interactions in the last half of the night to the hilt.
The main thing that kept recurring this night was investment and having large jumps of investment that the girls were unwilling to compy with.
I need to focus on babystepping investment by breaking large pieces of compliance down into more manageable bit sized pieces that can be chewed and swallowed at the given moment of time.
This can be done easily and just requires some mental agility to not be so attached to the investment as being the only do or die action to take but something that can be broken down into smaller manageable pieces.
Examples:
-Girl won't move across the bar with you -----> Move her a few inches, get her to dance for you, change spots with you, etc.
-Girl won't commit to going home with you or to an afterparty ------> Move them down the street, change their mood, go get a drink/bite to eat elsewhere, etc
-Girl won't kiss you-----------------> Get her to hug you, touch your hand, get her to feel you up, get her to kiss your cheek, etc.
Keep it pimping gents
-Rob
