Rob's Nightgame Gangsterism

[ray_zorse]

Yeah dude, girls with drugs are the pits as they're just not present & in the moment... more concerned about their internal state and where it is going, than on drawing good feelings from their environment... you probably saw my report on ecky taking, weed smoking raver chick, was hard to retain her attention, but hey I guess you can have fun calling them out on being useless tripped out hoes as you did in this report hehe. I wonder what might have happened had you challenged bf-dude though, I probably would have thrown it to the group... was it annoying-girl's house or original-target-girl's house? Cos I don't think anyone can throw you out except owner of house... and there's a good chance she wouldn't have backed him up especially if he was being a jealous-arse chode as you suspect. The fact they had drugs does not really make them a value proposition to compete with, it really makes them quite vulnerable as there's a social pressure to share the drugs without asking anything in return, so he can easily end up shouting everyone and then ending up lonely while she goes to bed with you, the lover. Has happened to me when I used to do that stuff! The fact that you don't take the shit also nullifies any power he might have had over you, and will leave him a bit vulnerable and out of his element since most of his mates do.
-Ray

 

[Mr.Rob]

Hey Ray thanks for the input. As far as challenging the bf oppressor I really had no desire to try and make shit work at that point. Once the guy to girl ratio was 5:2 I was over it. These girls aren't fun/cool enough to put in all the work of being charming and charismatic enough to make the entire group like me enough to escalate on the girls.

I think trying the bf oppressor dude would've just caused turmoil. They were all high on coke and yeah just not in the mood to deal with that BS.

I like your attitude though, "anything of the lay/reference point" I'm usually about that life but in this case I was more willing to cut my losses and take home the story. What would've been best would be to have had them come over to my house, and idk what I would've done with the weird chode guy just leave him outside or something.

-Rob

 

[Mr.Rob]

A Date...

Met this girl in Publix the other night, pretty basic shit. Had some basic conversation, a small neg, brought her back from autorejection and then did a little shopping in the store together before grabbing her number.

She responds to ice breaker and I can tell there's a good chance she'll come out on a date.

Hit her up, get date logistics set to go and then meet her up for coffee.

3 main points of the date

1st off I met this girl for the date and I soon find out she's quite the romantic. We didn't pick a place to eat so we're walking around looking for an idea. She subtly suggests we go to the expensive steakhouse (bitch be crazy).

I suggest something more casual/cheap. We go to a pick up Italian restaurant where you order at the front prior to ordering. I asked her if she had cash on her (for the $10 meal we were splitting 5 and 5), she said yes, and then questioned on why I wasn't paying.
I tell her I'm broke, take her money, and go buy food.

Anyway first point of date

1. When I first meet her tonight I was leaning on a park bench in this outdoor mall area and she came up half expecting a hug, but ambivalent if she should take initiative or not. I give her a hug and hold her in warmly and she doesn't budge and embraces me.

One point in particular right after this we started walking and I put my hand on the small of her back as we walked. She came closer and I soon took my hand off her back, really for no reason... Kind of lame in retrospect.

Walking with ones hand on the small of the back is an easy, low effort way to get touch established, have her invest passively, and set a more sexual/masculine expectation.

New habit to implement with girls you meet/date.

If girl is decently receptive, put hand on small of back and lead as so until she withdraws. Go until she pulls away or other.

We get to the restaurant finally and sit down, order food, etc bullshit.

Good Action. While ordering the food (shes sitting at our table at this point in time) I'm thinking to myself "of shit what am I going to say/talk about right now to get into some meatier conversation. I hope it doesn't get awkward." typical bullshit.

I go sit back down with her and say something basically just off the cuff and hope it sticks,
"What was the most interesting thing that happened to you this week?". I said it with not really any chance of it going anywhere but merely giving me time to think of where to go next... and then a stroke of genius arised

She responds very nil to my question, to be frank.
Her: "Uh Idk the most interesting thing ha, how am I supposed to answer that?"
Me: (Thinking like damn your boring) "Answer however you please" (in my mind I'm thinking it's a question to get dialogue started just make something up if you have to)
Her: "Uh ha idk I guess this that boring thing... I don't really know"
Me: "Well make something up!.." (playful/assholish challenge)
Her: (knocked out of autopilot) "Oh! Wow, uh I guess I killed my roommate"
Me: "No way you're kidding me, why would you do such a thing?"
Her: "well reason xyz etc etc"
Me: "Wow how interesting"

and thus spawned this dramatic non real scenario that we continued to talk about for a good 2 minutes or so. Just ridiculous jib jab about her killing her roommate and the story behind it.
Helped me deep dive her a bit and get to know what makes her tick in a fun way, and most importantly got us off small talk instantly into fun stimulating conversation.

*I want to remember this and play around with a bit more. Its similar to role playing but you get the girl to talk about this hypothetical situation and steer her to paint the picture... imagine if you could turn things sexual with this? Get her giving a hypothetical sexual situation... Might be worth exploring!

The rest of the date in the restaurant goes well.

Nothing to crazy to write up.

Deep diving could be improved a bit. I have trouble once in a topic finding the exact thread to go deeper into and exactly how to go about it.

*With deep diving I don't think I ever mastered it but I just got pretty good to the point where it built connections and thus I stopped focusing on it (for some reason deep diving for me was like my biggest focus of conversation when I was new).
However I think I could polish off a few knicks here and there and go deeper/further into her dreams/goals/emotions/etc.

*I talked about myself quite a bit, and am making a bad habit out of it. Not going overboard but not allowing myself to be the mysterious man to be worked on to be revealed.

*Another thing I did well was talk about what I wanted to talk about rather than run out of things to say. I also had a lot of passion about certain subjects which felt good to speak with such emotion about. Though these subjects don't necessarily tell a LOT about myself as much as they do give a glimpse of my personality and what makes me tick.

2.
Next we walk back to our cars. She gets in mine to listen to music. We actually sing together "Just a small town girl" when the song comes on and it was quite an amazing duet.

At this point my plan is to find an excuse to bounce her back to my house and escalate (it's been a good hour/half at this point).

I like to get girls to drive my car so it feels as if they're driving themselves to my house and it's more "their decision" and thus more in control/comfortable with the whole shebang.

She's in the driver seat and I tell her to drive. She tentative, and will hardly warm up to the idea. I keep convincing her she'll do amazing and she eventually starts the car and drives around. I respond positively and she keeps driving.

I tell her she doing good and to go on the main highway towards the gas station.

I kept telling her "yeah your in control here, your the driver" and she's about to go the way towards my house but last minute gets the idea to go visit some neighborhood she thinks is absolutely amazing in the opposite direction. I try my best to get her to turn around without sounding like I have an agenda, but she's excited about her idea to visit this neighborhood and I figure just let her wear herself out and then we'll head to my place on the way back.

20 minutes later we get done looking at her neighborhood and head back towards my place.

I think it was a mistake letting this girl drive but I wasn't anticipating she'd go the opposite way we needed to head.

At this point it was a bit hard to get her to go my direction. I talk her into going to the gas station on the way to my house, and she complies. I try and amp up the fun vibe so she doesn't have time to logically process where we're going.

I succeed to a certain point but not enough to disengage her logical mind.

We get to the gas station and she's still in the drivers seat. I start to deem this not a great thing and suggest we change. She says she likes driving now.

I decide not to make it into this huge production (after admitting I don't like driving etc etc I want a choeffer, and then be like "Oh by the way I want to drive now") and let her remain in her seat.

I'm thinking now I perhaps should've just taken the keys and told her to chill in the seat and that it's only fair that I show her my favorite neighborhood (mine ) since she showed me mine.

I let her remain in the driver seat. I get back in and we leave. I do my best to talk her into going towards my house, she almost complies but then changes her mind again real quick saying it's late and time for her to get back.

3. Lastly we end up back in the parkinglot we started at. I'm thinking at this point it's going to be hard to turn things around to get her home with me now.

We talk in the car a bit more and I go into proposing that she comes back with me, follow me in her car, and we'll have a romantic nightcap under the stars while drinking wine and eating cheese. I can tell she really likes the idea but is saying no because she knows it's at my house and doesn't want to risk being a slut. She verbally says "I don't go home with a guy on the first date" which makes me think that perhaps I've allowed myself to be put in the boyfriend role, which I feel I'm typically pretty good at avoiding.

*Also note I haven't made a move to kiss her yet. I was planning on not kissing her until we both get home, but at this point I feel as if I should kiss her so she doesn't think I'm a bitch.

I keep persuading her to come home with me (persist a good 4-6 times) she eventually leaves my car into hers, with the remark I don't take no for an answer. She's in her car and I get out and go persist more that she come with me for 15 minutes, and can leave at her pleasure.

She eventually rolls the window up, smiles warmly, and waves warmly.

I walk away back to my car.

I believe that perhaps my persistence made the point I'm not a little bitch and that made up for me not going for the kiss... idk if that's even a deal breaker or not or if it's just in my mind that you should make some sort of move (kiss) to show her you're not a little vagina, but I try my best not to kiss girls in non seduction locations.

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What I would do if I could do over again (2 routes).

Route 1: go for the informational date, and bid farewell right after the dinner, build sexual tension prior to leaving and hopefully get her to chase.

Route 2: I would've drove myself or found a way around the whole driving in the wrong direction which took things completely in the wrong direction of what needed to be done.

Also could've gone the route of her still driving but when we went to the gas station and she was on the verge of going to my house I could've not mentioned the neighborhood we're going to is mine and then appeal to the aspects she liked most about neighborhoods which I learned through her talking.
(family oriented, pretty suburb, etc etc)

Thats where my biggest mistake was of letting things getting off track was allowing her to drive to her neighborhood in the wrong direction, and not succeeding in getting her back to mine.

Also for you guys reading what's yalls experience been with not kissing a girl on the first date and the expectation it sets as far as being a sex worthy pimp? Lame or not a big deal?

I believe I'll see this girl again for another date. I'm thinking date compression ASAP and try and build some intrigue but don't invite her home or get physical on date 2, then invite her home for date 3 and hit bangtown USA.

Will keep posted.

Keep it pimpin

-Rob

 

[Mr. Wes]

Rob, I can imagine how frustrating it must've been getting closer to checkpoints and having her backtrack.
You did good though. Look at the consistency you're getting with setting up dates or having effortless connections, etc.
about the boyfriend zoning, I'm starting to believe that there are types of girls out there who don't see lover roles existing in their minds at all. I could be wrong. I think they're just super idealistic and kinda crazy believing in things like "soulmates" and shit. Lol
Like, just about every girl is attracted to Channing Tatum right?
Some girls wouldn't mind just hooking up with him if the chance arrived and they go their separate ways and she can be happy that she had an amazing time with a high value man.
But then there are other girls who feel like they can't just hook up with Tatum, they gotta pull him down into a relationship. Even if he's not ready for relationships in his life, they figure they can change him and be there when he is because it was "meant to be". Their satisfaction comes from knowing they can keep a high value man...I guess to validate themselves to other girls or society or some shit.
Like I said, I could be wrong.
Currently, that's my take or women and it shows where I'm at in game right now.
Maybe some of the tribal elders have viewed things like this at one point but then found the key to being perceived as a "lover" effortlessly.
Sometimes I feel like me and you are mentally at the same level of game (although you've slept with WAY more girls than I have, so you're actually more experienced real-world wise)
Nevertheless, I'll give my take on things because these boards give the advantage of us guys bouncing ideas off of each other until we find answers.
We wouldn't be where we are if it wasn't for each other.
(That sounds corny as hell...I'll just go back into the Disney movie in which I came from)

Deuces
Wes

 

[Mr.Rob]

I'm starting to believe that there are types of girls out there who don't see lover roles existing in their minds at all

That's an interesting thought Wes.

I don't have enough reference points to say one way or the other but I feel like there's definitely girls like that in speculation (I'd definitely say the girl from last night was on that level).

However I think the name of the game is to be sooo ridiculously out of being remotely considered BF material (at first glance at least), that the girl thinks "no way is this guy dateable but he's soo fun to be around" (good emotion) and thus the man created a lover role for her in the course of 2 minutes...

That's the goal at least

-Rob

 

[Mr.Rob]

•Year 3: At some point during this year (for me it's generally early- to mid-Year 3 in whatever I'm doing), you suddenly hit a mark where you look around and say, "I've made it." Most of your lingering doubts are cleared away and you have achieved the thing you initially set out to achieve. For me in music, that was the ability to wow a crowd. For me in pickup, it was the ability to go out and pull girls home consistently any time I was really willing to pull out all the stops and game HARD. For me in business, it was reaching the point where I had enough money coming in that I knew I'd never need to work for a company again, and I could replicate it fairly quickly and easily if for whatever reason an existing business was totally obliterated because now I knew business.

I'm AM going to do this!!!!

Report from last night coming soon if I can get my comp to work.

 

[Mr.Rob]

I've heard the metaphor of getting "in-state" likened to getting a stubborn mule to get in motion.

It's a great metaphor but I thought originally it only applied to getting into action taking approach momentum, however for me I've found it applies for approach taking momentum to get over AL (approach laziness vs anxiety which is typically what AA is when you get to a higher level) but also into pushing interactions farther (physically or leading in general).

2 examples from last night to demonstrate:

1. I got to this rooftop bar/club and was a bit tired/lazy from work and lethargy. I'm standing around like a complete chode (happens sometimes) for the first 5 min. scanning the environment. There was a group to my right (a plumper girl and a decently hot girl with her boyfriend) and I knew I should go approach just to get into action taking momentum.

Two minutes later after trying to kick the stubborn mule to go approach and break past the inertia I still hadn't approached and God became angry at my weakness and sent this fat girl over to open me and pull me into her bridesmaid party filled with other fatties... at least I have social proof I guess? haha

*This was an example of getting the stubborn mule to move in getting past approach inertia

2. This is an example of getting past approach inertia no problem but getting comfortable in the interaction and not getting past the inertia of engaging %100 and moving the interaction along accordingly.

This was a girl I should've had sex with. But I fucked up by not keeping my eye on the ball and moving things along accordingly.

Passive reaction vs. Tender aggressive pro-action.

I was still stuck in my head a bit but I went onto the dance floor and found two cuties dancing it up a bit. I approach the girls and with a situational opener open the group.

My intention was really just to use this open to build momentum, but she contributed back to the interaction so I stayed in set. We bantered about the song choice and then as to why we're both here.

This group of 3 guys opens the girls as well soon after. They're kind of chodey and don't really make much of an impact though they engage both girls the girl I like soon turns back to converse with me, while the 3 chodes hit on the friend.

Soon enough the 3 chodes walk away and the friend is talking about going to help her friend who's sick in the bathroom throwing up and leaves. Now I'm with the girl I like and I don't think she's that into me but I tell her to move to the next bar.

She complies. I put my arm out motioning for her to interlace her arm and we move together to the next part of bar.

We get to next part of bar. We're in fun conversation. We chill on the bar. She's talking to me and I can't hear her because it's soo loud. I pull her into me while leaning on the bar (law of least effort/physicality=sexuality), she complies, likes the dominance but retreats back to where she was after completing her sentence. (she has to play the game of not being too easy and just staying in my arms against my body)

I get her to lean in once more and at this point it was get her to lean in, and then she retreats instead of her staying which was starting to become borderline annoying so I take the easy, rejection free route, and stop pulling her into me to talk and we just talk loud at each other instead.

*If I could do it over again I'd pull her in, make excuse for her to stay against me (musics too loud or talk about how your body releases oxytocin after being against someone for long enough time), and see her reaction. Even if she rejected my advance she would've have left and she'd respect my authoritah.

Conversation wise:
I could tell she was into me, following my lead in the conversation contributing etc. etc. (at first at least). Her pupils were dilated, and she was quite attentive.

Conversation started off good but soon shifted to more "date like" conversation deep diving and more deep and not lighthearted/fun conversation I find better suited to bars/clubs for me personally.

I failed to challenge her much after we got into deep diving and then things got a bit stale, boring, and the vibe started to become drab. I find it difficult to resuscitate a died vibe back to life again.

I think I also missed an escalation window somewhere along the lines as well because we stayed in the same spot for a good 40 minutes and that's just a bit crazy.

I made an attempt to move her by proposing we go get food, she wasn't totally opposed to the idea but her friend was coming back and she wanted to meet back with her.

Should've seen that coming. I flinched a little here (dunno why) and then changed the subject. I should've invited her home for a nightcap around this time but I fell into the inertia of pushing the interaction farther.

*The stubborn mule: This is where the stubborn mule comes back into play here because just like in AL/AA the path of least resistence is to just sit back and not approach. When your in set the path of least resistance is to sit back and not push things forward too hard so you don't get a harsh rejection or emotional turmoil.

How do you get the stubborn mule to move? Probably the same way you get it to move with AA/AL. It's like making the right vs. the wrong decision. You usually know when you're making the wrong decision and it's better to will yourself to do what you know you need to do in the first place.

I know when I'm going to ask a girl home it's the same feeling of wanting to do it perfectly that you get when you want to ask a girl out when you're new.

The thing is by taking the path of least resistance your wasting everyone's time and though it's easier your not going to get laid like so.

Despite my fail to move things pro-actively here I still think I could've made shit work.

Her friend eventually came back and we went to a different section of the bar. Now I have my girl and her friend who wants to have fun and party/meet a hot guy most likely. We ended up drifting between a couple bars us as a threesome but it was a bit directionless and I lost track of focus and how to move things along accordingly (I think my girl also lost a bit of attraction due to awkward leadership and missed escalation window).

*Lesson Learned: It's better to push for the close of investment asap (especially if she moved and invested) and get rejected, recalibrate to where she's at and try again (until she leaves) then to passively wait around hoping for a layup.

*Lesson Learned: Stay pushing the line until she displays signs of it being too much in which you respect her wish, take a step back and start again. This will also keep the subtextual emotional rollercoaster better "primed" so to speak.

This means:
-If she interested and it "feels" like it's time to invite her home IT IS time to invite her home despite her answer.
-If she's liking you pulling her in dominately for you to hear her, keep escalating physically! Don't get cold feet and stop doing what she liked! Disrespectful of her desire to feel feminine and submissive!

*Lesson Learned Don't allow conversation in the club to get too deep or lacking of emotion/fun. Be aware of where the conversation is headed and spike for attraction when needed. Deep diving is cool but save the date vibe for dates not loud clubs where people want to just have fun.
-Don't forget to be challenging in conversation
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Sexy Brazilian
This girl I opened situationally and she was mildly receptive. I conversed mildly. Then I went direct, she opened up a bit more. I teased her and self amused and joked around a bit. I could see in her eyes she was becoming more attracted to me. I failed to move her on a high point (2minutes in) and continued to joke around too much. She stopped investing and I was now in the chasing role and she went back into autopilot.

Lesson Learned:Don't self amuse too much. Even though it's fun to pump your emotions too much is too much.
Move the girl immediately on the high note of the conversation. Ideally the instant after saying whatever funny shit I say "here lets go sit down" before she stops laughing/good emotion. That way you get the "the good emotions are leaving over here, you want good emotions so continue with me".

Also getting physical with her would've created a stronger "man-woman" interaction.

I opened only 10 girls last night and out of the 10 girls I had 4 that were receptive of me. 2 hooked (the first girl wrote about and the last girl I approached whom I have a tentative date set for Tuesday night) and I know if I would've moved things along and handled objections properly I should've been able to have sex.

2 girls didn't hook but were receptive to me spiking/amplifying attraction and I know if I would've done so I could've made something happen.

Though I failed to operate at max gangsterness level I did however realize just how close I am and just how much potential I have to easily reach my goal of "physical abundance".

Out of 10 girls 4 I could've potentially moved along to sex. Girls are attracted to me. I am a sex worthy man. I just need to move things along more decisively and dominantly until I do reach my goal of being able to pull a girl on any given night assuming I approach enough women.

Frustratingly close!! RARRRRR

I'm about to go hit the daygame scene as today's been somewhat of a waste and I'm pissed I didn't close last night. About to go hit this shit hard.

-Rob

 

[Mr.Rob]

I'm Here:

6. Commitment to grinding: if you don't wife up a pretty-good girl at this point, you end up reaching a point where you say to yourself, "You know what? Screw it. I'm going to buckle down and do whatever it takes to get great at this." Most of the other guys who started learning game at the same time you did have dropped out by now, so you're among a select, dedicated crowd. You realize you've been more or less coasting since you started getting that initial success, and begin taking a more methodical approach to your game again, akin to the one you had back in your pre-success grinding days. You start biting off bits and pieces and tackling your game in a small-improvement-by-small-improvement way once more

I'm going to get here:

7. Major breakthrough (abundance): the major breakthrough comes when you have some watershed experience where you realize that you can pick up a sufficiently cute girl any time you want, so long as you go somewhere with enough different women to meet and you have enough time to keep meeting new girls there. This is the moment when you really feel you've "made it"; you're never going to worry about not being able to get laid again, and you will always be able to have sex with a new girl whenever you want to do it. There aren't many men who stay at it long enough to reach this point, and you're one of a small class of "enlightened" men who can now look at dating, relationships, pickup, and seduction candidly and see them for what they are, rather than trying to delude yourself with fairy tales to protect yourself from an uncertain reality

I'm getting fucking pissed. I know I keep making mistakes somewhere along the lines. I've met over 100 girls in the past month been on 3-4 dates gotten countless phone numbers, kissed 5-7 girls, and one lay.... WTF yo? Clearly I'm going wrong somewhere and I think not being totally committed to my night out and allowing myself to drift off could be one of my flaws.

However I feel like I'm so close to reaching abundance!

Push it! Don't give into the inertia!

Keep it pimping!

-Rob

 

[ray_zorse]

Yeah dude I've recently reached the "commitment to grinding" stage too. Just getting those kinks out one at a time. Unril recently it was not trying to move girls a few mins into the interaction, and consequently having it go stale (this is more of an n-game issue)... getting better at this. Current big issue is in d-game, having great conversations but failing to go for the date or the number (this is more of an issue with hired guns since other d-game targets I tend to go for insta-date but I want to change this since I feel my impatience is preventing me reeling in higher value targets).

What would you say your key issues are at the present time?

-Ray

 

[Mr.Rob]

What would you say your key issues are at the present time?

Weeding out all the dumb unconscious habits I have is one. For example if I'm not in state in daygame I have a bad hesitating problem to go approach rather than "see girl--->approach without though".

Another one is qualifying myself. Another one is failing to get past small talk in daygame settings.

I have my strong and weak suits in daygame/nightgame despite their not being much difference other than psychologically in my opinion.

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Quote from Chase's Ebook regarding getting a girl to do whats best for both of you and making it her idea.

For instance, you might be invite a girl home, but she's surrounded by friends and you know if you ask her plainly and simply to accompany you back, it's going to be a problem. So, instead of doing so, you say:


“You know, I'd really love to invite you somewhere alone with me where it'd be just the two of us, and we could have drinks and talk and hang out just us. It's too bad all your friends are around.”

What this does is to:

•Tell her what you'd like to do to her / with her


•Set a barrier up that stands in the way of this happening


•Communicate to her exactly what she needs to do to make it happen


This is far more effective than simply saying, "I'd like to take you home," because it follows up with, "But I can't," then gives the girl an action to take if she'd like to make it happen.

I could use this quite a bit. Last Saturday when I was out with the first girl of my report I could've used this instead of asking her to go eat, I could've broached the subject at a high point and I think it would've had a lot more utility than my pathetic "go eat something" and her "I can't leave cause my friend is coming back soon" shit.

Is it a game if a man tells a woman he'd like to kiss her passionately, it's just too bad there are so many people around?

 

[Mr.Rob]

Been up and about lately and hadn't been updating this journal as much as I would like to.

I'm always amazed at how little it takes to influence emotional states, particularly my own.

When you're in an emotional state it always feels like you'll be in it forever. When you're happy you wonder how the heck you were so down the other day and how trivial it seems now. When you're down you wonder if you'll ever feel happiness again. The craziest part is that you can feel both of those polar opposite emotions in one day.

I digress.

I went to take an exam today and on the way walking back I was toying around with making eye contact properly with girls as they walk past. Reading Drexel's latest post sort of got me thinking about being more selective with my approaches to the point where I started doubting my typical "open whoever" type of approach. I think what Drexel was saying definitely has it's merits but I'm definitely someone who needs social momentum to get outside my head when walking down the street.

Example: I'm walking back to my car and I see a cute girl walking towards me down the sidewalk. Instead of making eye contact I instead check her body out in a way of a pre-open and I then make eye contact when it's clear she's looking at me. She gives me this flirty yet shy smile and I can tell she was "warm" to be opened. However despite getting this clear sign I don't open her because I'm stuck in my head and don't want it to go bad in front of everyone.

I'm still kicking myself for that one! "He who hesitates is lost!" I'm going to get that tattooed on my fucking cock. The pain will be so immense that I'll never forget.

Anyway later on in the day when I proactively got some social momentum going I had the balls to stop my car in the middle of a parking lot and go meet some broad with amazing legs. Go figure.

Moral of the story is one I've known for quite some time now and that is to always be proactive in gaining social momentum. No need to miss out on girls that are clearly open to being opened because you're stifled and in your head.

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FR: Kiara

After meeting a few girls this evening in town square and getting one blow out, and a couple of go nowhere's I went to grab some produce from Publix and was amazed to find no hot women there! (Seriously every time I go to Publix it's like walking in the fucking club and a lot of times the girls are dressed they're in a club too .

I start amusing myself with the cash register as she rings up my produce. I make a joke about stealing the Publix baskets and comment on how all the red necks in my last city stole them all for house decorations. She's cracking up and I'm enjoying my self expression.

I feel good now!

I'm walking out the store and I see this girl looking at herself in her car window fixing her hair. I can't tell if she's actually cute or not because she's not facing me but I'm praying she is!

I get closer and I make the assumption that she is cute and blatantly call her out on how great she's going to look for all the popular/cool people in Publix. She turns around laughing and I continue teasing her.

I can tell she's at least moderately curious, but she walks away still being in autopilot. I call her for to hold up a second and I think I ask where she's from.

We start talking and she asks where I'm from. I tell her to guess and she looks me up and down from head to toe and I notice her look at my shoes. She tells me I'm from Florida. I call her out for stereotyping me based on my shoes.

She's laughing in a very attracted way. I keep challenging her and I about send her into auto-rejection when I tell her to remember my name and she almost forgets. I push her even closer to auto-rejection when I tell her to spell my name and she lacks confidence to spell it correctly and opts out. I then pull her back a bit and change subjects.

The biggest mistake I made here, though it didn't lose the interaction, was that I was amusing myself a bit too much. Getting too close to funny jokester instead of cocky devil may care asshole. I could feel that if I would've made a couple more jokes or monologues I would've been out of the running for sexy seducer.

I got her number and we may go on a date tonight. She's getting cold feet tonight but has proposed a different day so we'll see how things pan out.

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A couple things I want to make a full post on in the future that this field report reminded me of.

1. Self amusement: Why it works, how to use it, and how much is needed.

2. The principle of being proactive vs. reactive: I'd honestly say if I had to average up all my interactions I'd probably lean more towards the reactive side however when I'm "ON" I'm on the proactive side. Before writing the post I want to get more field experience on the benefits of being proactive, why its soo necessary, and examples on "effecting the environment rather than the environment effecting you".

and perhaps

3. Social Momentum: A full How To on warming up socially and how to do it in daygame and night game. Why it's necessary for certain people.

That is all for now!

Over and out,

-Rob

 

[ray_zorse]

Self amusement: I sent following text to 18yo student who had only been in Aussie for a few days, after insta date where I took her to the zoo to take photos of kangaroos:

Me: hey... roo shooter... hope you are getting used to camp life. Any more snake hunting expeditions since we spoke?

I was highly amused, pissed myself all morning, but it lost me the interaction, later read in Chase's ebook "chase frames are dependent on attainability being in place" which it wasn't in this case. My bad. Anyway I suspect the same is true of self amused/IDGAF or rude/arrogant behaviour so this may help to calibrate if you hadn't seen it that way before (I hadn't).

Ray

 

[Mr.Rob]

Sup Ray! Yeah dude using self amusement (especially high obnoxious levels) can definitely backfire if she's not already into you. However I was just thinking about how you can actually use it as a screening tool. I want to play around with that aspect a bit more before writing about it.

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Nightgame 2/28

Last night was one of those night where I was more focused on having fun than actually pulling. There was a group of guys I met recently into pickup that are actually close if not above my level so I was mainly focused on hanging with them and solidifying that connection. However in the process of networking I sort of sacrificed my night by being unfocused and sort of bouncing from girl to girl.

Wing Double Makeout
My wing who I started the night out with did probably one of the coolest things I've seen in a while. He's only been in pickup for 4 months or so but he's essentially a natural who had a kick start in the PU community to get him off in the right direction.

My wing was very stuck in his head for the start of the night and it seemed like it was going to take him a while to get social. We go open a few groups of girls to get some momentum going. We open a group of 3 girls and am chatting to one with my back to him and the rest of the group. I turn around and the next thing I know this dude has a girl in each arm and is making out with one, then the other, then he puts the three of their heads together and they all makeout simultaneously. Haha it was actually really fucking inspiring.

I've seen TylerRSD on Youtube do double makeouts (usually with his girlfriend) and just naturally assumed you have to be really good to do that (limiting belief). All it entails is making out with a girl, then getting another girl to join... super simple shit.

Nonetheless he opened my eyes to show me that perhaps I'm getting a bit soft and aren't pushing this shit as much as I should be.

3 most memorable interactions

1. Used the "pogo" opener to approach this girl. Pogo opener is where you jump up and down (not like little tip toe hops but actually looking like your on a pogo stick) moving in the direction of the girl you want to open until you actually bump into her. It's a ridiculous opener but it's absolutely hilarious to use and it's also cool when every one thinks you're a weirdo and the next thing they know the girls all over you after using this dumbass opener.

She was very receptive after I apologized for running into her too hard (I accidently hit her too hard lol). I picked her up in my arms and carried her over. I know if I had more time this would've been a more solid interaction but when I picked her up her fucking fat friends came over and pulled her away from me (I was being a tad aggressive).

I actually opened this girl about 4 more times since then and each time the friends told me to fuck off because "can't you tell she's not interested" which I think translates into "can't you tell we're fat bitches that want validation and if we can't have sexy men talk to us than neither can Suzie!".

Every time I went back and talk to her for the couple seconds I had she seemed receptive.

*If I could do it over again I'd approach the friends and befriend/charm them before trying to open the girl because obviously they're never going to let her talk to me otherwise.

2. Girl I madeout with. She was walking past me and I said something too her and she playfully pushed my chest (great reception). I pulled her into me and traded names with her. I wanted to makeout with her and she was talking about some stupid shit about me buying her a drink. I told her to kiss me and I'd buy her a drink. We made out and I gave her my cup of cucumber water and left.

I should've probably been nicer since she seemed receptive of me or moved her but in that moment I was more focused on getting action taking momentum since I just saw my buddy get a double makeout.

I approached her again as she was coming out of the club and she was kind of pissed at me haha. Then some alpha dude told her to quit talking to me and pulled her away to his car (they were leaving together).

3. Honestly there really wasn't a whole lot of anything else to report from here on out. Opened a couple more girls that weren't interested, got a few blowouts, and then a couple that were interested and didn't go anywhere (or the friends ripped them away >:O)

Have a date tonight, and if it falls through I'm going to hit the house of blues so will report back soon.

Keep it pimpin,

-Rob

 

[Mr.Rob]

Memo for making new friends

"Groupthink." This results when participants' desire for agreement overrides their motivation to evaluate alternative options. In this situation, people tend to withhold their opinions, especially if their views differ from those of the group leader. They make little effort to obtain new information from experts, and they selectively filter information to support their initial preferences. They may spend a lot of time inquiring about what others in the group want so that the solution they reach will make everyone happy.

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This is straight out of my school textbook and it reminded me of my tendency to do just this. This being desire for agreement with people that I like and enjoy being around.

My textbook points out that this desire for agreement overrides motivation to evaluate alternative options.

People tend to withhold REAL opinions of group and instead conform to the collective ideals of what the group values.

I just met some people that are really into RSD culture and pickup and though I've gained ALOT from RSD in my development as a man I also realize they have a lot of "groupthink" tendencies that are easy to get sucked into.

I need to remain vigilant when hanging with these guys to voice my REAL congruent opinion and not just agree with the group ideals in order to be cool and fit in. As by trying to be cool and fit in I'll actually be sacrificing my masculinity.

Does a real man sacrifice his underlying value system for anyone?

I haven't had friends for 2 years now and thus I've been somewhat individualistic as a result. Now that I have guys I may be rolling with I want to voice and act from the "real me" despite what they are doing and thinking is cool.

I realize this is part of being a man and acting from MY own personal code of values without adopting others.

 

[Mr.Rob]

Just dropped a girl off from a date.

Met up at Starbucks at the one closer to her house, in which she specifically requested.

I got there first and got a water and sat down out front.

She came a bit later and didn't order anything, but shared my water with me.

We just got into talking and I didn't want the vibe to die down and dwindle at Starbucks so I suggested we go to a park and eat dessert (theres a park right next to my house).

I drive to my house and pull in my driveway in which she doesn't give much bullshit too. I tell her we'll get desert real quick and take it to the park. We end up making the desert (frozen berries in the microwave with whipped cream that I end up shooting on her face).

Instead of walking to the park I tell her to show me the music she likes on my computer in my room. She complies.

We feed each other berries and I soon kiss her and resume normal conversation.

At this point we've only been together for 45 minutes. I feel as if she isn't ready to go full on makeout so I let things chill and change the songs up. She seems to get more comfortable and I keep trying to get her to sit on my lap. She doesn't comply. We lay next to each other on the bed and talk I tell her to get up and we're now in each others arms. During this time I became very narcissistic and put the self love on fully, which she was eating up (not helping my ego any).

She asks "what do you want?". I tell her "I want to fuck you" and stare deep in her eyes. I knew this was 50/50 when I said this how she would react and I think in the context that it was given she felt a bit slutty and judged herself.

We then had this conversation of sluts and I bring up my thoughts on society judging women that sleep with men fast, and how it's all there to keep society orderly.

She brings up that she has a boyfriend. I don't know if it's an actual boyfriend but I don't put much weight on it and talk about polygamous relationships and how not everyone is wired to be in a strictly monogamous relationship. She inquires on what I do and I give a vague answer.

Eventually we get over this whole charade and I get her laughing again and tell her my caveman theory about how slut shaming came about.

Soon enough we're making out and feeling each other up. I keep trying to take her pants off and she won't let me.

I then propose that we have a pajama party and she agrees. I give her some sweatpants to throw on, she changes in front of me. I then pin her against the wall and start making out with her passionately.

I unbutton my jeans and whip my erect cock out and put her hand on it. She gets more turned on and I tell her "I want you to suck my dick". She sort of laughs and gives me bedroom eyes but doesn't go down on me.

I think perhaps the self slut shaming kicked back in.

I put my finger in her mouth and she passionately sucks it HARD.

I know she wants sex but I need to figure out how to get her past her own resistance.

She qualifies herself as being a 12 out of 10 on the freaky sex girl scale, but is holding back.

We get back on the bed and she's fondling me.

Then she stops and appears to lose passion. There's a little tear in her eye and I can tell she's starting to judge herself again. I stop and do my best to reconcile her being here even though she allegedly has a boyfriend (who seemed to go away more the more she progressed to sex and in which when I dropped her off said "we're not really dating"). I tell her that she never would've chosen to meet up with me earlier if she was truly in love with her boyfriend and happy with the relationship.

She agrees a bit and things cool off for a while. We talk and form more of an emotional connection.

I don't know if this was a good move or not letting this cool off and just talking and kissing as it was a bit tooo coupley and perhaps I set the wrong frame in allowing that.

We were there for SEX not bonding with stranger timeand I think I screwed up on that part.

Perhaps it would've been better for me to have been more emotionally unavailable and just more Pimp status. "Alright cool I have to get up early so time to take you home" type of deal.

Would be interesting to play with...

Anyway we sort of cuddle and talk and I tease her for the next hour. I try and get things back on track by telling sex stories and getting her to tell hers. I didn't know how to really talk about the explicit parts, so I sort of left out the best part but it was interesting to see how she started putting her hands on me more when I told the story (because it was preselection for the girl in my story wanting me so it made her want me too).

This helped but I sort of dropped the ball by letting conversation get off sexual topics and back on more platonic shit.

I tried to place her in a role play but didn't have a strong enough game plan for where to take the role play as I couldn't get creative enough.

We kiss a couple more times but I stop kissing her as to not reward bad behavior.

I push a bit more and try to take her pants off (tried like 20+ times) and also try and give her a back massage which she won't comply to because she says if I give her a back massage she won't want to leave.

I sort of run out of steam and at this point have been in bed together for 4 hours almost and I can't really come up with anymore creative ways to get things back on track sexually.

She says she needs to leave and so I take her to her car.

So at this point I figured I just needed to chalk this up as a failed escalation on my part and note my main mistakes.

Typically every time I've failed to bed a girl once bouncing her back to my place I'll never see or hear from the girl again, she views me as less of a man, and loses attraction.

However I was surprised that this girl when I dropped her off said she actually wants to see me again and even initiated a kiss goodbye which I was quite surprised by.

I still have doubts I'll actually see her again but we'll see how things play out. Maybe I didn't fuck up as bad as I thought I did and it was more HER than ME.

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To Improve On
-Instead of chilling out and letting the vibe die down and cuddling (which when I write that I feel like a fucking chode for cuddling with a girl I haven't had sex with) I would instead handle her emotions and continue escalating.

-staying passionate throughout whole escalation. Remember Marty's advice and perspective with his last girl in which he escalated on for 8 hours passionately

-talked to much about myself last night.... damn self love

 

[Mr.Rob]

*Quick note on last date: Something I forgot to do was get the girl under the fucking covers and escalate from there (Chase has written a few times how this somehow psychologically triggers women to loosen up a bit).

That and get really whacky and start making up pretend imaginary roleplay to get her to turn over and allow me to give her a massage (since the logical commands didn't work).
This would be "I'm the god of fire give me your hand! Ha now you're blazing on fire roll around to get the flames out or you will die." (she rolls over) "Stay there or I will set you on fire again 10X hotter" (commence back massage)

Don't forget this shit!

-Rob

 

[Mr.Rob]

Quick St. Paddy's update.

Went out with a buddy and had good momentum early on but that faded away somewhat fast and continued to fade throughout the night.

Interactions:

1. Girl at this small super chill bar we hit up first.

I was standing making fun of this dude next to me and she came up with a blue dress on. I opened her by asking where her green was in a somewhat authoritative way. She opened very warmly and we started to banter about wearing green. I told her I was the god of green and thus could judge accordingly. She dug deep into her bag and pulled out a green jacket that she laid around her neck like a scarf and showed it off. Here she qualified herself and allowed her to pass by saying it had enough green to pass.

*Note she was pinching me in a very flirtacious manner the whole time.

The conversation thread ended and she tells me that she used to work at this bar and is here to see her friend. She sees her friend working at the bar and shrieks with joy (how some girls do) and goes to say hello. She then drifts through the crowd to her friends.

I think I could've opened her again and had things go well but we left and I wasn't overly worried about it, though in retrospect I probably should've reopened her.

2. This girl I met on the deck of the club in the cigarette area. She was annoying as ever and I felt like I was talking to a stoned hippie cartoon that fell out of the TV from an old cartoon. She was "fuck-able" in looks but she sure as hell liked me. I basically just teased her, told her I was god, how she was going to hell, and more bullshit.

She told me to do something to embarrass her so I choked her sexually in front of a group of people. She smiled and enjoyed it.

This got us onto the topic of hardcore sex and she qualified herself saying that she's down for anything. I know this is an escalation window but she was soooo annoying I couldn't bring myself to move her or escalate things...

Her friends left to another part of the bar and she tried desperately to drag me with her but I opted out thinking "if I met a girl that into me this early into the night surely I'd meet another girl I actually like in no time".

Well no time turned into some time and I ended up not really getting anywhere.

3. I half assed it the rest of the night and of course nothing came about. I'm a bit pissed that I half assed it. I feel like I wasted my time. Now I have to work tomorrow.

I have two dates lined up for Thursday night.

One is a girl I met last Saturday night at the bar. The other is the girl from a few field reports ago who took on a date, brought home, and failed to escalate.

I honestly can't believe that she's even into me still but means I'm doing something right.

-Rob

 

[Lotus]

#2. Sounds like she was dripping wet from your complete and utter arrogance!

I honestly can't believe that she's even into me still but means I'm doing something right.

It's funny how this is working out for you considering we were both in the same boat for the same reason about a week ago. It's nice to get breaks like these when you fuck up, all the work and time invested shows it's paying off.

I ran into the girl from my situation last night. She was seemingly ice cold and bored at fuck until I pulled her aside for a 1 on 1 and she warmed up almost instantly without me doing much at all.

Hopefully we can both pull lays out of this. Good luck on your date.

 

[Mr.Rob]

It's funny how this is working out for you considering we were both in the same boat for the same reason about a week ago. It's nice to get breaks like these when you fuck up, all the work and time invested shows it's paying off.

Yeah Brum definitely. Keep us posted on how yours turns out.

 

[Mr.Rob]

I don't really know how I feel about last nights date.

I don't get mad over a failed escalation when I tried everything in my power to make things happen but last night I just gave up.

I get upset with myself when I don't act through the masculine character I wish to emulate and evolve into (idk if that is phrased correctly).

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This was a weird date and I really don't even know if I should've even gone on the date.

I get to the place we're supposed to meet at after she confirms that she's going to go on a date with me.

She tells me she's 20 minutes out. Okay no problem I'll give her the benefit of the doubt and give her time to show up, maybe something happened and she got caught up.

20 minutes passes. 30 minutes passes. At this point I'm meeting other girls in the bar we were supposed to meet at to pass the time and generate social proof hoping that she'll show up.

40 minutes passes. WTF. I call her to see what the fuck she's doing. She says she's about to leave and is 5 minutes away. I tell her to park at xyz location and she agrees.

She gets there 10 minutes later and is tipsy from drinking.... off to a great start already.

Lol she's late because she was getting drunk before the date. This one is a keeper.

I don't know maybe I was too "nice" in still going on the date with her? Perhaps I should've moved on or escalated really quickly to establish more dominance?

Anyway we're talking and I get physical and she apparently likes it. We talk. Everything she says is the fabricated story about her life and won't give and honest answer for any question I ask.

She seemed open enough to be escalated on as we kept talking about explicitly sexual shit.

exp- I flung water on her face and she's says "wow I was soo dry before you made me wet". Though she says it in a very matter-o-factly type of way and not very sexual, though she's not very sexual on the surface anyway.

If I could do this over again I would've led her to my car and escalated from there to save me time and headache.

We walk around and I suggest we get desert. She asks where and I say we should get some berries and make them at her house (her house is allegedly 5 minutes away).

She says I'm not taking her back to her house on the first meeting. I ignore this and keep walking towards Publix to get the desert shit. Publix turns out to be closed.

We walk back and head to my car. I tell her to take me to her house. I start driving and she keeps telling me where to turn. Eventually she tells me where to park in which case I do.

We get out and start heading to where she lives.

After about 5 minutes of walking she tells me that we're going to this bar of some sort in which I feel like a fuck for even believing her in the first place.

Here if I could do it over again I would've just called it a night and gone out with my friends downtown and pimped it there.

But instead I follow her (I can't believe I'm writing this). Luckily she informs me the place is closed so we head back to my car.

I start driving to my house.

She puts up token resistance but I easily dissuade her and tell her its cool my house has a park and berries.

We just banter and talk in the car.

We get to my house I take her inside (she objects and tells me that I said I was going to take her to the park... I go inside anyway).

She meets my roommate and goes to the bathroom. I go to my room and when she leaves the bathroom I call her into my room.

She puts up more token resistance and I tell her to show me her music. We're joking around and this is where I run into a sticking point of mine as far as physical escalation goes.

I don't have trouble pulling the trigger in going for the kiss or escalation in general but I do have trouble setting up the right dynamic I want to have, especially with the conversation that "leads to sex" type of talk.

I want to be the highly sexual dominant man that takes women in an aggressive way while still being tender enough in my aggression to not be a uncalibrated caveman brute.

Basically I want to get to the point where my escalation game is so strong that she's crawling over me wanting me to kiss her and then when the tension is really high I escalate hard and passionately in a way that makes her soo wet LMR is an afterthought and she's begging to get fucked.

Haha however this was not really anything of resemblance to that....

I don't escalate and she says she wants to go to the park down the street. I think that's moving backwards but before I know it she's out my door and says she's going to the park and that I'll follow.

I could give a shit and originally planned to just stay in my room until she comes back (so as to not comply to her lead). However I remember her saying she's a kleptomaniac (probably as a joke but everything that came out of her mouth was not serious so I really don't trust her at this point) and I didn't want her rummaging through our house (my roommates a lawyer with some cool shit) so I go to look for her to make sure she's not taking anything.

She turns out to be outside down the street waiting for me so I go to meet her, and we walk to the park. I explicitly tell her the only reason that I came out was to make sure she wasn't stealing shit.

We get to the park and she obviously wants me to kiss her. I tease her a bit by getting close to her face in which she almost kisses me but I don't. I'm waiting to get her back in my room.

She seems into me all of a sudden so I take her back to my house.

We go inside, pour a glass of water, and talk in the kitchen. I think about escalating in the kitchen but then bring her back to my room.

She sits in my chair after some talk here and there I take her face and start making out with her in the chair. It ends and I resume back to normal conversation like nothing happened.

I take her out of the chair and pull her into me and lay her on the bed almost lazily. She gives me this look like "well I guess here we go...?" and we start making out.

This last point I want to harp on because this happens just about everytime I bring a girl home. Lately I've been having trouble escalating in a way that turns her on and things seem very "step by step", passionless, and uninspired. I know the adage "turn yourself on and she'll follow" but I guess I've been fucking lazy or something.

Anyway we're making out on my bed I pull her on top of me and try and go for her panties. She pulls my hand away. I keep making out with her. Go for her panties again, she pulls my hand away and tells me she's not going to have sex with me.

This continues for a bit and I just give up... .

I've never given up before. I don't know what the fuck to think.

It's like I work so fucking hard to get better at seducing women and then just give up on the last 5%.

She clearly knew why she was there and wasn't completely opposed to being there and I just fucking give up.

Idk maybe I've been too focused on learning seduction and need a break or something to get inspired and passionate again.

She wanted a ride home (30 minutes away) and I really didn't want to take her. I told her she could sleep over and I'd give her a ride in the morning (I was serious about it). She called a friend to pick her up a 2 oclock in the morning to take her home. She then told me I was a dickhead for doing what I did.

Whatever, maybe I am, but I played by my rules.

I don't know what to think of last night. I feel lame and mad at myself for not stepping up and taking action in a more dominant and boss like way and for giving up.

I know what to do I feel like I'm getting soft which really irritates me...

I think I'm going to get my head straight and come back again tonight or tomorrow.

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Things I need to improve on:
-Physically escalating to sex fast and without fear if I think I could pull it off.

-Leading. Knowing exactly what the plan is or if plans are improvisational coming up with a plan fast and sticking too it.

-Physical escalation in the bedroom. Turn yourself on, have passion, act inspired.

-Frame control. There was a few times she wrangled control of the frame and had me following her lead momentarily (specifically when she duped me into believing the bar was her house)

-Persistence and passion in escalating.

- treating womens words like "the inane babble of a small child" instead of at face value.

I'm over and out to rethink things and hold myself to a higher standard.

Peace out pimps.

-Rob