The Ladykiller Chronicles

[Kvothe]

Ah yes, finally, a good day after a string of bad ones. As the pattern goes. The goal is to build the consistency in hooks to continue making approaching more fun, and less stressful.

First three approaches, the actual conversation is less important. I was dressed in grey jeans, black chelseas, a pink shirt, and pink mask. As per yesterday's note, I've started approaching girls in masks wearing a mask. This gives better social frame and calibrates better to her reality.

---

Girl #1 was a cute girl in a see through top and striped pants which showed a bodacious bottom. I opened using the moving opener which paces the unexpectedness of being approached in the day. I've been practicing that one in the shower, to make the delivery more natural, and more varied in tone and energy (as per Riker course).

What's interesting here, is the very first part of the interaction

Me: Hey, do you know what's fascinating?
Her: Are you about to say a pick-up line?

LOL. Not entirely sure how to deal with that. I just tried going into the rest of the opener, but I should have been more flexible. I think laughing, and asking if that's what most people who said hi to her tried, then maybe go into how tough women had it, with creepy men approaching, not viewing women as actual people. Then I could have gone into more of the opener, after I had paced and defused the initial comment.

---

The second girl, I should have just persisted and tried continuing the conversation by asking the golden question. That might have gotten me to the hook.

---

#3 was less exciting, with the girl just not responding to my conversation, so I left it.

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#4 Excitement

I see this girl walking across the street. She looks relaxed, and not in a rush to go anywhere. I have a good feeling that she is open to meeting someone. Glad my instincts were correct there.

Spoiler

Me: Hey, do you know what's fascinating?
Her: <stops> What?
Me: You know that feeling... when you're walking down the street, and something unexpected happens?
Her: <smiling> Yeah
Me: And perhaps you feel excited
Her: Yeah <in agreement>
Me: And maybe a little hesitation too...
Her: Yeah <in agreement>
Me: But you know... that this could be the start of an amazing story
Her: Yeah
Me: Have you ever noticed... the best way to learn about yourself... is by meeting new people?
Her: Oh yeah, definitely
Me: Yeah, like that process of engaging with new perspectives helps you understand things you like... things you don't like... and things that you didn't even know existed in the first place
Her: I had never thought of it like that
Me: Haha so what are you up to?
Her: Nothing actually, I'm not up to anything. My friends live around here and I'm not sure if I want to go see them
Me: Ah, is it just that you've tired of seeing the same faces over and over... and are feeling like making new connections, having new adventures
Her: Actually, I'm just not sure if I like them yet
Me: Ah, so you're not from the area then
Her: Yeah, I actually just transferred here for school
Me: Yeah, I can tell that about you
Her: Really?
Me: Yeah, you have this energy and enthusiasm about you... Most people here grow cynical over time. It's a breath of fresh air to meet someone different
Her: That's so interesting. I just moved from LA and people said the same thing about people there
Me: Yeah, I've heard people in LA eventually become more shallow, and cliquey as time goes on
Her: Yeah, I have noticed that myself. Wait, what's your name
Me: Kvothe
Her: HBPodcaster
Me: It's nice to meet you. Hey, let's get off the middle of the street, I don't want us to get run over by incoming pedestrians <no current people walking near us>
Her: Sure
Me: If I were to ask you, HBPodcaster, what you like to do besides sleep, eat and work, what would you say?
Her: Um, I like painting, and writing... and I also have a neuroloscience podcast
Me: Woah, that's really interesting
Her: Thanks
Me: So you really enjoy getting inside the minds of the people you meet...
Her: Yeah, definitely
Me: That's very cool. I feel like lots of people just don't live in the moment like that... Though on days like this, it feels like people are slowly coming back to life... Living in the moment, and feeling adventurous and spontaneous again
Her: Yeah, I've noticed it myself. What do you do?
Me: <Pause, about to answer, pause again> What do you think?
Her: Uh, I'm not sure
Me: I'll give you three guesses
Her: That's too many guesses
Me: Really, okay, two guesses it is then
Her: I'd probably guess X field.
Me: Wow, that's right <gives fist bump>
Her: Nailed it
Me: Haha

At this point we actually get interrupted by a waiter asking us if we're in line for the restaurant. I say no, she says she is. He tells us to just come to him whenever we finish our conversation.

Spoiler

Me: <Some comments about the place in general>
Her: <Responds>
Me: Hey, you're very cool, we should grab a coffee some time
Her: Definitely <visibly brightens>
Me: Cool
<Trades numbers>
Me: So what podcast are you working on?
Her: It's actually a podcast about the effects of OnlyFans
Me: Really? That's really interesting...
Her: Thank you
Me: I find it actually a really fascinating area... Like on one hand, I'm happy the women don't have to deal with middle men for sex work, and I love that they feel liberated to engage in the work... But I worry that the validation it gives people is damaging, especially to younger girls who join looking for fame
Her: Oh totally, I completely agree. I'm going to interview a couple of girls who do it actually
Me: And on the other hand, for the men that watch, they only end up viewing the women as sex objects, which affects how they interact with the girls they meet in real life... They expect the filters, and it hurts their ability to connect with the girls they meet
Her: That is so insightful. I've never had a conversation about OnlyFans with a person I met in the street
Me: Haha, neither have I, but it's really interesting. But I should go, we'll get together soon
Her: Yeah, that sounds great, but coffee is a little boring. Let's do something more exciting
Me: Sure, good luck on the podcast

Overall really great. I did have one moment where I added a cocky/funny comment, which I should not have. It was related to a comment I'd made about living with my parents for the last year. I should have been more calm and low-key, discussing how being in quarantine for so long has made the connections we make more valuable, and more important to be real.

Anyway, a great interaction, one of the best I've had so far. We vibed. I did some triangle gazing, though I didn't cut the space very well. Need to make sure sexuality increases in future meets. But did some basic liberation frames and non-judgemental comments that will help later on.

Regarding date, there's an art gallery near me that I can suggest. I'll suggest grabbing a quick coffee before to get her used to some touch, then walk to the gallery, before suggesting coming back to my place to look at some recent artwork I bought.

---

After the last few days of much more emotional lows, this was really needed. I'm looking forward to girls calling me insightful being the norm, and not the rarer case.

Cheers!

 

[Velasco]

I have a good feeling that she is open to meeting someone. Glad my instincts were correct there.

Me: Haha so what are you up to?
Her: Nothing actually, I'm not up to anything. My friends live around here and I'm not sure if I want to go see them

Me: Hey, you're very cool, we should grab a coffee some time

 

[Kvothe]

@Velasco


Not actually sure what you mean haha

But I realize I forgot to include that I did try to insta-date but she said she had to work on her podcast so I just number grabbed. Could have insta date still maybe, but didn’t try it

 

[Kvothe]

No replies from the girl from yesterday. Main lesson is that I should push as hard for the insta date as possible, even in day game. Numbers aren’t as trustworthy, even on really good leads.

Think you’re right @Velasco I should have trusted my gut and pushed harder for the insta date. On the bright side, I now have a great art gallery I know very near me that I can suggest as a day game transition.

 

[Kvothe]

Some approaches today. I notice my hook rate rising. Still a not very good 1/3, but that's better than my previous 0 haha. I'm focusing a lot on target selection, since the street ends up being the most active place for me. So girls who are walking slowly, who like they're not in a rush to places. I think parks could end up being a huge market if I can figure out how to better open groups. But I'll save that challenge for when I've gotten better at talking with just 1 girl.

Started a diet to cut my weight a lot. Aiming for a good physique just for better fundamentals. I notice my voice, body language, pace, and energy are much better than before I started Riker/TRE/COTN, so I'll be continuing those. Currently working through the adjectives section of Riker, so much more work to be done there. I'll also probably repeat the course multiple times through.

My dark blue jeans ripped, and today my chelseas also broke. Sending the chelseas in for repair tomorrow, and have ordered a new pair of jeans. So today, I dressed in grey jeans, and a navy blue linen shirt, sleeves rolled up. When necessary, I wore a clean white mask.

It was a beautiful day. 70 degrees, with a pleasant, calming breeze. People were out and enjoying the day. There were an abundance of attractive girls, but most were in groups, which I'm not sure how to handle.

In addition to approaches, I tried to stay warm, and make idle conversation with people around me as I walked. Complimenting dogs, and occasionally going into some verbals on how dogs become more like their owners over time. Conversing with the old lady after I missed a traffic light. Nice easy moments to build social momentum.

---

#1

I was walking along, and I notice this girl in a green top, with the middle portion exposed. I really want to meet her. She's also not wearing a mask.

I open with my moving opener, though maybe this would have been better to use the "Do you know who you look exactly like" opener. I need to practice that one though. I've practiced the other moving one a lot, and have good energy, pacing, and tone on it.

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#2

I open this girl as she's reading a book. I start with the park open from here. I make a comment about good author's being able to transport us to the worlds via just their words. I should have added on that I find it difficult to read in the park, as I get distracted by all the people, and energy, then gone into how meeting people helps learn about ourselves.

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#3

I see this girl across the street. She's walking in a very casual fashion, and I don't think she's going anywhere. I actually think she's on the phone with someone, and intend to approach the girl who is in front of her. But eventually I realize she is not on the phone, and that she seems more calm and seems more receptive to an open than the other girl I had intended to open. So I start talking to her instead.

Spoiler

Me: Hey, do you know what's fascinating?
Her: What?
Me: One day you're walking down the street... and suddenly something unexpected happens
Her: Haha yeah
Me: Maybe you feel excited... and maybe some hesitation too
Her: <Stares>
Me: But you know... this could still be the start of an amazing story
Her: Yeah
Me: Like, have you ever noticed, the best way to get to know yourself... is by meeting new people?
Her: Hmm, I don't think so... Wait, what's your sign?
Me: My sign? What sign do you think I am?
Her: I would guess either a water, or air sign
Me: That's a good guess... You're very intuitive. I'm a X
Her: I knew it! I'm a X too!
Me: Interesting... you seem very confident, which I don't think is normally associated with Pisces... The way you just came out and asked me my sign was cut through
Her: Thanks, I do consider myself pretty confident
Me: That's great... Pisces are also characterized by dreaminess, with our heads up in the clouds... Would you say you're like that too?
Her: I think so.
Me: Same, though I find that when I get so engrossed in a subject, I start shutting everything else out... What's that book you have?
Her: Oh, it's <some book>, I just got it
Me: Interesting... I'm a big fan of books, and one thing I've noticed... is that certain authors can almost transfer you to their own worlds, just through their words
Her: Oh definitely. You seemed like a Pisces to me, because you talk very poetically.
Me: Oh <taken aback>. Thank you... that's very nice of you to say
Her: So what made you want to say hi to me?
Me: Oh, just what I had mentioned earlier, like by meeting new people, you discover things about yourself you like... things you don't like... and some things you didn't even know existed at all
Her: That's very cool
Me: Like on days like this... where it's warm and welcoming... It feels like we become so much more adventurous and spontaneous.
Her: Totally!
Me: It's interesting... because I notice that so many people are glued to their phones and social media... the filters... and they forget to embrace the reality
Her: Mhmm
Me: Where are you off to right now?
Her: I'm getting matcha with a friend actually
Me: Oh no way... I'm a big fan of matcha... I love the way that sipping on a cup can create an almost meditative state... and once you finish, you feel invigorated and ready to take everything life throws at you <maybe should have said "ready to seize life by the horns and thrust yourself into the thick of it>

At this point she turns in a direction, and says the matcha place is right there.

Spoiler

Me: You have a really cool way of talking, and I you're quite interesting... We should grab a coffee sometime
Her: I'm actually not from here... I'm just visiting my friends
Me: Ah, okay... How long are you in town for?
Her: I leave Monday
Me: That's too bad, well, I know this is quite last minute... but how about either tonight, or tomorrow?
Her: I'm hanging out with my girlfriends tonight... and tomorrow I'm going to a wedding uptown.
Me: Ah, that sounds really nice. Well I hope you have a really great rest of your trip
Her: Thanks! It was really nice talking to you
Me: Likewise

Notes:

I wish I had a better response to "What made you want to come and say hi to me?" Though I wonder if this comment means that the open didn't feel like a meet-cute? I ad-libbed, but maybe a better reply would have been

Her: What made you want to come and say hi to me?
Me: You have this energy and enthusiasm about you... It's different from most of the people around... You strike me having a penchant for adventure and spontaneity that I like a lot

The goal for the above would be to more directly state interest... Albeit without coming out and saying it directly. Given that she was responding well, and had initiated some threads that made us very similar, maybe this was something I should have done. My main hesitation is that it makes it seem like I approaches her, as opposed to it having some element of fate to it.

But not showing interest also doesn't seem good. I'm not sure, if anyone reading has any suggestions let me know. I'll continue thinking about this as well.

I also think I could have persisted a little more at the end. I should added this:

Her: and I'm going to a wedding tomorrow...
Me: Ah, that's too bad... I feel like these days, finding a genuine connection is difficult, and sometimes you meet an intriguing person, who makes you a little curious, while still feeling safe... It's too bad there isn't anything we can do

And then let her respond, and hopefully she's bring up a suggestion. Or I could follow up by giving her my number, and tell her to let me know where she's at tonight, and that she and her friends could come and hang with my friends. At least then I could have exhausted all potential options.

---

One issue of meeting on the street is the inherent difficulty of it. There's a reason it's recommended to start on stationary girls. That said, 1/3 as a ratio for hooking girls is something I'm proud of at this moment. I want to work to keep improving it, to make me more efficient over time. Once I have a strong hook rate, approaching should switch from scary, to incredibly exciting. There's also something very validating about the last two girls I've hooked calling me "poetic" and "insightful". It's been a short time, and I'm already seeing some great improvements to my verbals.

 

[fog]

this chick wanted you bad dude. heres my take:

Me: Hey, do you know what's fascinating?
Her: What?
Me: One day you're walking down the street... and suddenly something unexpected happens
Her: Haha yeah
Me: Maybe you feel excited... and maybe some hesitation too
Her: <Stares>
Me: But you know... this could still be the start of an amazing story
Her: Yeah
Me: Like, have you ever noticed, the best way to get to know yourself... is by meeting new people?
Her: Hmm, I don't think so... Wait, what's your sign?

the bolded part is a social frame grab - its an obstacle she threw in there for you because her levels of emo stim and sexual arousal were high. it can be a bit of a precarious situation...you would have noticed her lose some interest had you not been a Pisces. you passed - she got excited.

Me: My sign? What sign do you think I am?
Her: I would guess either a water, or air sign
Me: That's a good guess... You're very intuitive. I'm a X
Her: I knew it! I'm a X too!
Me: Interesting... you seem very confident, which I don't think is normally associated with Pisces... The way you just came out and asked me my sign was cut through
Her: Thanks, I do consider myself pretty confident
Me: That's great... Pisces are also characterized by dreaminess, with our heads up in the clouds... Would you say you're like that too?
Her: I think so.
Me: Same, though I find that when I get so engrossed in a subject, I start shutting everything else out... What's that book you have?

after the social frame grab, you have an opportunity to amp up the sexual arousal key through your verbals or non verbals. when she told you she was a pisces too, you could have turned on a sexual vibe and transfered the energy over to her....or transitioned into some sexuall verbals. for example, she says shes confident. you could say something like:

i get a sense you are the type of girl who goes for what she wants and always gets it! (im sure you can notice what that is implying)

Her: Oh, it's <some book>, I just got it
Me: Interesting... I'm a big fan of books, and one thing I've noticed... is that certain authors can almost transfer you to their own worlds, just through their words
Her: Oh definitely. You seemed like a Pisces to me, because you talk very poetically.
Me: Oh <taken aback>. Thank you... that's very nice of you to say

you amp up some more emo stim, and it causes her to return to social frame one last time....shes hitting on you very hard here when she says you talk poetically.

Her: So what made you want to say hi to me?
Me: Oh, just what I had mentioned earlier, like by meeting new people, you discover things about yourself you like... things you don't like... and some things you didn't even know existed at all

Now, she's trying to initiate the sexual arousal key herself. But you give a bland answer that suggests there is nothing between you...so she lost interest right after. its a good answer used in the right situation. but in this case its bland.

When the girl initiates this part herself, she's looking for signs of attainability.. a good thing to say would have been ... "do you know when you meet someone and you instantly click with them? theres instant chemistry, and the rush is so fascinating...i had a feeling that would happen with you... *launches into stories of connection*

good job kvothe. you are close to getting bitches like no tomorrow

 

[Kvothe]

Great analysis @fog. As usual I’m kicking myself for not thinking of what you suggested. This time though, I feel exhilaration instead of dejection from analysis, as my hooks are improving and becoming more consistent, so I feel the opportunity to try again right around the corner.

I think I might have fleshed it out a bit more, regarding her asking “why did you talk to me”, as I agree with your assessment of it requiring me fixing some attainability.

Her: So what made you want to say hi to me? Me: Do you know that feeling, you look over… and see someone… and feel a certain pull, drawing you to them… and as you talk, you feel like you’ve known each other for far longer than you have. And as you notice that, you discover a spark, an ember… of chemistry, which you know could eventually grow into something more…

What do you think?

Your notes on social frame are extremely helpful. In the moment I’m not good at recognizing these beats for what they are, so it’s really helpful to get that feedback for my own improvement.

I do also need to work on nonverbals. Cutting space and triangle gazing are important to work on.

 

[Velasco]

I wish I had a better response to "What made you want to come and say hi to me?"

But not showing interest also doesn't seem good. I'm not sure, if anyone reading has any suggestions let me know.

But you give a bland answer that suggests there is nothing between you...so she lost interest right after.

https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1389534525777133569

"The blue-breasted male cockateal moves slowly into the female's realm. AS his scent is picked up, the female displays her yellow-colored feather adornment [receptive]. The male picks up on her interests and initiates the distinct coo sounds of an interested male [showing interest]. The female is pleased that her choice is responding to her mating cues, and responds in similar coo fashion..."[shows interest]

I, PUA: Interesting Article: pAImAI by Crablouse

ipua.blogspot.com

 

[fog]

Me: Do you know that feeling, you look over… and see someone… and feel a certain pull, drawing you to them… and as you talk, you feel like you’ve known each other for far longer than you have. And as you notice that, you discover a spark, an ember… of chemistry, which you know could eventually grow into something more…

What do you think?

sounds like something a ladykiller would say

https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1389534525777133569

"The blue-breasted male cockateal moves slowly into the female's realm. AS his scent is picked up, the female displays her yellow-colored feather adornment [receptive]. The male picks up on her interests and initiates the distinct coo sounds of an interested male [showing interest]. The female is pleased that her choice is responding to her mating cues, and responds in similar coo fashion..."[shows interest]

I, PUA: Interesting Article: pAImAI by Crablouse

ipua.blogspot.com

she was putting herself in a position to be swept away by kvothe.....by asking him to describe the pre-approach dance they had....which would tell her if this was flirting, or just a friendly conversation...it was tough for her to tell since the keys can be quite indirect and kvothes non-verbals are rough right now

his answer told her, "we're just friends", moving their relationship backwards

how you can trigger the girl to put herself in this position by running the social and emo keys on her...pre approach or after the approach.... it intrigues me

 

[Kvothe]

Thanks @fog

Yeah non-verbals definitely need work. My current main method of improving non-verbals is through TRE, COTN, and some additional forays into Undoing Yourself, and Qui Gong.

---

Today did 4 approaches. I felt much more uncalibrated today than last week. Additionally, my voice and pace of speaking were totally off. The mix of bad fundamentals, and mild rust from two days without approaching took a mild toll. One other reason for reduced strength verbals might be that I had a slight head cold over the weekend, and still have some phlegm stuck in my chest. Will still need to pay attention and focus on bringing that fundamental back up though. Need to also focus on hydrating throughout the day. I didn't drink as much water as I needed to during the day.

As I had chores to do, all but two of the approaches were on moving girls. The other two were more situational, which I think I ejected too early from. Need to work better to stay in set longer.

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#1 Art Gallery Girl

This girl was fairly big, but she was alone, and looked like she might have a nice face. I'm also horny, and my mind said, "just open for practice".

She's looking into an art gallery, stopped on the street. I stop and look into the art gallery for a few seconds before opening over shoulder. I should have been better about sensing when I enter the girl's awareness radius, so my opener can be timed better.

I went into a situational just asking what the building we were looking into was, then trying to pace her reality by discussing how looking at art can foster your own creativity, by the choice in colors, subjects, and lighting (said worse than that). I should have talked more softly, and gone into better verbals on how looking at art, especially good art, can make you feel as if you're in the painting yourself. The colors and textures engaging the senses until you hit a meditative point where your own creativity builds.

I did build intrigue by talking about where I was from not having art like this. Tried to get her to guess but she just refused.

I eventually left the set as she wasn't very receptive (most likely because of my rusty verbals and bad fundamentals).

---

#2 Park Girl

I saw this girl walking past. She struck me as not very busy, and her choice in behavior supported this. I turned around and followed. I noticed her stop and look into a park. I tried asking her when the park was opened. Again, I hadn't fully entered the awareness radius, making it look like I was looking at her first.

I did try and go into a RPO about how sitting in a park can be meditative and tranquil. I also tried to bait her into asking where I was from, but she didn't. She actually responded decently to some of my statements, but I still ejected. Need to stay in set.

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#3 Losing The Social Frame Grab

I'm on my way home, and I see this girl walking. She's wearing a cute outfit. I haven't seen her face, which it turns out has a decent amount of acne. But cute body.

Spoiler

Me: Hey, do you know what's fascinating?
Her: What?
Me: One day, you're walking down the street... and something unexpected happens
Her: Like what? <from previous discussions with fog, this is a social frame grab, unlike last time, I don't pass, and the girl loses interest fast>
Me: Like anything could happen... And maybe you feel a little excited... and maybe some hesitation too... but you know this could be the start of an amazing story

After this, I try to follow up, but she doesn't respond well to further stuff, and I go into a dumb aside about Kefir, trying to talk about how meeting new people can teach you about stuff you didn't even know. She excuses herself and walks down an alley. I later spot her, walking right where we would have gone if she had stayed with me. That actually happened twice to me, so I know that I was uncalibrated and need to improve that. Although today I had gone out with the intention of trying to approach even on girls I didn't have as good a feeling of, to see whether my reads were correct. Conclusions were inconclusive as, like I said, my fundamentals today were trash.

Anyway, regarding the social frame grab, I should have responded with something better:

Me: Hey, do you know what's fascinating?
Her: What?
Me: One day, you're walking down the street... and something unexpected happens
Her: Like what?
Me: Like you meet an intriguing stranger in a unconventional way <points at self>... and you wonder to yourself whether this will be an exciting connection... but perhaps you feel some hesitation too... but you KNOW, this could be the start of an amazing story

Suggestions to the above welcome.

---

But I need to go through another run through of the three keys in SMMA, along with refreshing some of the intro Riker exercises.

Some other notes are that I'm not stopping as I'm approaching. I need to stop better, and have the presence to command that non-verbally. When I do that, my body language improves drastically. When I follow the girl, body language understandably goes down more. Additionally, my approaches felt robotic today. My opener needs practice again, so that I can maintain the proper levels of energy and enthusiasm to not have it feel like I'm a robot approaching.

Will try to focus more on stationary girls as well, glad I approached the two stationary girls I did see though.

 

[Kvothe]

Just a short update as I'm about to fall asleep from exhaustion.

Did a good number of approaches today. Was dressed in white linen shirt, grey jeans, and black shoes. Got one fake number, one long conversation with a cute girl that didn't hook, one insta-date, and a couple other approaches that fizzled out.

---

#1

A moving set.

Main notes here were that I did the majority of the talking. To the point my talking pace was fast-nervous, and she didn't really contribute anything. Tried asking the golden question, which was a plus, but she was non-responsive. I also tried moving her too soon. Should have let her answer the golden question and started some mild deep diving before attempting that.

I also need to practice my "Do you know exactly who you look like" approach. I think that one will hit harder than the one I'm currently using. But my main note from this was that the part where I ask "One day you're walking down the street... and suddenly something unexpected happens" needs to come across as if something unexpected is happening to me too, not just to her. More of an abstract note, as it relates to tonality and vibe.

---

#2

I actually tried sitting next to this stationary girl, but as I glanced over, realized she seemed too young, and left it. Then someone else comes and sits down hard on the bench. Opening very direct to the girl. But he's dripping with confidence, so she hooks. Though he isn't able to get the number. I do follow him, trying to meet a potential wingman. Somehow I lose him as he exits a gate though.

I see a girl walking across the street. Great figure. I follow and open, but she doesn't really ever hook. I try to immerse with a couple of different topics, but can't get her to commit. I think the do you know who you look like would've netted better results.

---

#3

FR - A MILFy Return

First FR of the indirect era. Let's go! It was the first 80+ degree day. I was dressed in a white linen shirt, sleeves rolled up, on grey jeans with black chukkas. I'd been doing some approaches during the day, and had prepped during the work day by passively listening to Riker on the side...

www.skilledseducer.com

---

#4

Mostly documenting this one because the initial sequence had a wrench that I didn't know how to deal with

Me: Hey, do you know what's fascinating?
Her: <still walking> what?
Me: One day, you're walking down the street, and suddenly... something unexpected happens
Her: Okay?
Me: Perhaps you feel a little excitement... and maybe some hesitation too, but you know... this could be an amazing story
Her: Oh
Me: About to say something
Her: Oh okay, I get it <said in a non-friendly/snarky way>
Me: Like have you ever noticed how the best way to get to know yourself... is by meeting new people?
Her: Actually no... <almost dismissive/angry> I think the best way is by hanging with people you know. You can be more like yourself
Me: Ah interesting... I've found that when you meet new people... you can learn more things about what you like... things you don't like... and some things you didn't know existed at all

I think one improvement here would have been to have a pace at the last thing I said, and then a reframe

Her: Actually no... <almost dismissive/angry> I think the best way is by hanging with people you know. You can be more like yourself
Me: Interesting... I totally get what you're saying... it's so nice to be able to hang out with friends you've known forever... with whom you can feel comfortable and relaxed
Her: <will probably agree>
Me: But you know... when you meet someone new, there's the potential to discover things you didn't know about yourself... things you like, things you don't like... and some things you didn't even know existed... While you may sometimes get that while hanging with old friends, I've found that for the most part... we end up sticking to the things we know, things that don't rock the boat.

---

After this, I do a few more approaches on the way home, but none are too good.

Things that were good. Lots of approaches, most were higher quality than in the past. I practiced using trance words more, though I was stale by mostly using the word "suddenly". I'll need to branch out more. Voice, pace, and energy was varied and good. Body language was also good. Adjectives felt good during the FR.

Altogether, lots of improvements, and lots more improvements to go.

 

[samuraijack]

I was at the same park (WSP) today...actually most days. Are you part of the pua crew here in nyc? Not many of em know about this forum.

 

[Kvothe]

I was at the same park (WSP) today...actually most days. Are you part of the pua crew here in nyc? Not many of em know about this forum.

I don't know what PUA crew exists in NYC, though I often see people daygaming at WSP. It does add to my belief that approaches in parks need to be as covert as possible. A large PUA crew is undoubtedly visible, and girls can probably pick up on that.

 

[Kvothe]

With diligent practice comes just rewards.

Three approaches today, one good hook, one eh, and one hook that should have been that got derailed. Progress, sweet progress.

My jeans had ripped, so I bought new ones. They claim to be temperature regulating, which is good, though how believable is up to your judgement. Dark blue jeans, black chelseas (newly repaired), white linen shirt sleeves rolled up, and black bracelet. Black messenger bag to give me a social frame of going to the park to read.

It was a hot, muggy day. The kind where most people start sweating, but that makes the very air feel sensual and potent. My favorite kind of weather. Sundresses out and about, the hints of parts normally not revealed... I love summer.

---

#1

I enter the park, and see a large congregation of people all gathered on a lawn. I spy a girl in a pink romper looking at her phone, away from the crowd. I have a good feeling she's open to a stimulating conversation.

I go up, staring at my phone, until I'm slightly in front of her. I give a few moments to try and get into her awareness radius. Then I open very indirectly, but move my positioning to be very close to her.

She's wearing a pink dress, deep v cut. She also has a decent amount of acne, but it's a perfect approach opportunity, and she's good looking enough.

Spoiler

Me: Hey, do you know why everyone is gathered here?
Her: Oh, it's for a bitcoin pizza party <in a distinct accent>
Me: A bitcoin... pizza party? How exciting...
Her: Yeah
Me: You're not from around here?
Her: No, I'm actually from Moscow
Me: Very cool... I could tell that about you... you have this energy and enthusiasm to you... like I can tell you really pay attention to the things and people that cross your path
Her: Isn't everyone here like that?
Me: A little, but I find that they're often bored, and cynical after staying so long in the city. I think people who are bored wouldn't pay attention to the things around them as much... Does that make sense?
Her: Yeah! It definitely makes sense.
Me: Hey, if I were to ask you what you like to do besides work, sleeping, and eating... what would you say?
Her: Ah, you took work out
Me: I did <with a smile>
Her: I like photography, and art
Me: Interesting... so you consider yourself the creative type
Her: Yeah
Me: That's awesome... I love meeting people who are creative and who are able to express their passion through art
Her: I mean, I work in a very tech atmosphere
Me: So do I... but I find that I don't want to be identified by what I work or do you know... We all have so many parts to our identities, and things we love that aren't work... Wouldn't you rather be identified for that?
Her: Yeah... So you're a tech worker?
Me: Yeah, I am.
Her: What do you code in?
Me: What do I code in?
Her: Mhmm
Me: I code in X language...
Her: Cool
Me: Yeah... Hey, let me ask you an interesting question... Let's say you won the $5 million vaccine lottery, and you could travel anywhere you wanted to? Where would you go?
Me: If covid weren't an issue
Her: Hmmm, anywhere? I would go to Iran
Me: Really, Iran? Interesting choice... Well, imagine you boarded your flight, and you land in Iran, and drop off your bags at the hotel... What's the first thing you see yourself doing?
Her: I'd probably go get food!
Me: Haha, you're a big fan of Iranian food?
Her: Well...
Me: Or just all foods?
Her: Haha, yeah all foods I think
Me: Traveling is amazing isn't it? I think it's an incredible opportunity to be adventurous... even if it's kind of scary at first, because you don't know anyone
Her: Yeah
Me: It's still so important because it helps you become your own person.
Her: Definitely
Me: You strike me as an adventurous person
Her: I am!
Me: I love that haha, you seem like you're the kind of person who when you see something you want, you'll always get it
Her: I try to be
Me: That's awesome... It's rare to meet people who trust their own judgement and follow their own passions... So many people are more sheeplike, they follow what other's say for them, or what other's perceptions of them are... It's amazing to meet someone, who can follow the beat of their own drums
Her: Those are very wise words
Me: Thank you! I appreciate it!
Her: Hey, the pizza just arrived
Me: Oh, thanks... I'm actually on a diet though... I just popped in to see what the crowd was... there's an energy in the air you know... almost pushing people to be more adventurous and spontaneous and make a new connection
Her: Yeah
Me: Like have you ever noticed that the best way to get to know yourself... is to meet new people?
Her: Definitely!
Me: As you engage with different perspectives... you start to learn things you like, things you don't like... and some things you didn't even know existed at all
Her: So true!
Me: Meeting people is such an adventure... sometimes you meet someone and the conversation is stilted, slow, and weird... Other times it feels like you've known each other far longer than you have
Her: I've had that for sure
Me: But what's really exciting... sometimes, as you're deepening that connection, you discover something more... a spark of something... chemistry... that you know can grow into something more passionate, if you just let it
Her: Yeah, I know that feeling for sure
Her: Hey, I actually see one of my friends... I'd come here to meet them actually, so I should go
Me: No problem... You're very interesting to talk to though... I'd love to continue this conversation later
Her: Yeah, sure! Do you use instagram?
Me: I actually deleted the apps a while ago. Do you ever notice... how many people get glued to their phones, to the point they miss out on all the beauty around them... I might have missed this whole gathering if I'd been staring at my phone as I walked in
Her: Yeah, so true

So we trade numbers, and I have a little longer conversation before heading off. I sent an intro, and we'll see if she bites.

I'm happy about the juicy level of discussion I was able to have, though I couldn't get her fully facing me. But we stood close to each other, and were definitely in a bubble compared to the people outside.

---

#2

I see a girl sitting on a bench, eating a acai bowl. I open by asking where she got it, before weaving that it's the perfect day to enjoy it, with the warm sun. There were two main issues here. The first, I interrupted the girl early, which I think gave the vibe of me just wanting to talk. I have to remember to let the girl fill in the conversation too.

The last was I stopped talking too early. I was close to the hook, and all I needed to do was ask the golden question, but I paused and let the moment slip.

---

#3

One of my goals for the day was to try the "Do you know who you look like opener". So I saw this girl in a pink dress, quickly looked up the actress's name who I thought she looked like, then waited for a good moment to approach.

Spoiler

Me: Hey, do you know who you look exactly like?
Her: What? <in an accent>
Me: Do you know who you look exactly like?
Her: Who? <stops and faces me>
Me: <Pause> Actually, I'm not sure if I should tell you... I know some girls get offended by that kind of thing
Her: Okay <laughing>
Me: Okay, do you promise not to get mad at me?
Her: Okay
Me: You look like Eva Mendes
Her: I don't know who that is
Me: Ah, she's an actress... though you have a different energy to you... You're not from around here?
Her: No, I'm Israeli... so I need to be alert
Me: Ah, yeah, I can imagine. It's definitely a really tough time
Her: For both sides
Me: Yeah, for both sides... I imagine it must be even tougher for you... as someone whose identity may cause you to feel sympathy for one side, and being here and feeling sympathy for the other side
Her: Yeah
Me: But I can tell, that you seem like a very empathetic person for feeling that way, and that's really nice
Her: What does that mean?
Me: Like... you have the ability to put yourself in other people's shoes, and can really understand their perspective

She's fully facing me at this point, and we're talking. But she gets a call from her friend, who's about 20 feet away in a restaurant and saw us I guess. So the girl starts to leave... but I try to get a number just in case. I think the social frame was just not good enough since the friend had seen, so unsurprisingly, the girl says she has a boyfriend.

It was still really good for me for a specific reason. I paced her on the Israeli comment, to try and show that understood her at a deep level, before leading towards the empathy qualifier. That's something I haven't been doing as much, and is something I need to do more of.

---

Lot of really good things happened today. Hook rate rose perceptibly, and the girls were cute and fun to talk to. I was relaxed, and practicing my verbals is making rust, or a warm up become less and less necessary, as I can feel the way I have of talking slowly changing.

Will try to night game tonight, otherwise will go back out tomorrow for another day game session.

 

[Kvothe]

Update from the night.

I think I could have had my choice of pulling three different girls. Unfortunately, I'm not practiced at pulling the trigger and actually making the move. Taking no risks is not an option. Next time I'll work harder to do better.

---

Context

I start of the night with some friends. They're gone, while I'm completely sober as I try to lose some weight. I dressed casually in black jeans, and a grey t shirt. We begin at a friend's rooftop, where I make mild small talk with various people, nothing too big. We slowly transition to a house party, and it starts off mainly a sausage fest. I try to make conversation with the people there, and the party starts getting more lit by the moment. Soon groups of very cute girls start walking in.

---

#1

First girl was this cute asian girl, who I flirted mildly with, running through some imagine games, golden questions, etc. She eventually gets pulled away by a friend, and never returns.

---

#2

This really cute latina arrives, and she heads into the kitchen where I'm standing. She trips over my feet, and apologizes to me, while I try to play it off as my fault. She grabs drinks for her friends and they are all standing by the bathroom. I head over, and have a brief conversation with them while I wait. I use the bathroom, then come out, and I eventually start talking with them. I need to make the intro smoother though. I kind of bear-walked in and just introduced myself, then got lucky that one of the people knew me from some random event a year and half ago. This gave me a little more of a social opening to enter.

I introduce myself to this girl. She's got dyed-blonde hair, and is wearing a skin tight dress that shows a mild, but not terrible, amount of belly fat. I still think she's very attractive. I talk to her, and pace her reality a lot, discussing how most people lack empathy, are robotic, and are overall selfish people. I tell her that she seems confident, and probably always gets what she wants (paraphrased). I need to make that slower, and more sexual. While my voice quality was good, my pace was too fast.

The entire time we're talking, she's leaning heavily into me, body touching mine, while I'm sitting on a sofa. I do get the vibe that she's possible attention seeking though.

We get separated in a moment that breaks the bubble, and I can't reignite it. She's now leaning on the opposite wall from me, while I'm still chilling against the back of the sofa. What I should have done is just scoot over a bit, and pat the seat and tell her to come back so we could keep talking. Because I didn't I had to start having a conversation with the girl, and one of her friends.

---

#3

Simultaneously while all this is happening, I think I got social proof from talking to girl #2, and another of her friends comes and sits down on the back of the sofa next to me. Once the conversation between me and #2 gets broken again, I start talking to #3. This is an interesting conversation, and I won't relate a lot of the deep diving. But I went through golden question, beginning of tourist frame, some banter, and then we start talking more about relationships and it gets much more juicy.

Spoiler

Me: Have you ever noticed, the best way to get to know yourself... is through meeting new people?
Her: Oh yeah, I've definitely noticed
Me: As you engage with new perspectives... you start to learn the things you like, the things you don't... and some things you didn't even know existed
Her: Mhmm
Me: And when you meet someone new, it can be an adventure... it might go badly, and the conversation just doesn't flow... Or it can go amazingly, and it feels like you've known each other for far longer than you have...
Her: Yeah, true
Me: And sometimes, with those connections, you discover something more... a spark-
Her: Yeah, I know what you mean... but have you ever had a thing-I assume you're single?
Me: Yeah, I am
Her: -where the person just becomes so clingy?
Me: I think I actually self-select out of those haha... but I have friends who behave like that sometimes
Her: Like I just want something casual out of this person, and then they start texting me so much, and it gets annoying
Me: I get that... I can't handle that either... But it's amazing to see that you're so self-assured like that... I really like that

We dive a little deeper into this, but I can't remember the exact details of the conversation as well. Along the way, I think I've seen that twinkle that so many other seducers describe. She was fully ready to go, though I forgot to set up an open loop to give plausible deniability to go back to my place. This really hurt me, as I had to try and set this up after.

But eventually, I notice her fanning her face a lot (the apartment we're in is HOT), and I suggest we go outside to get cooler. She says she can't go too far from her friends. I pause, and then just suggest we leave the apartment, and hang out outside. She agrees, and we go, and then she continues to walk all the way down, to the exit. Then she pauses, and asks if we'll be able to get back in. I, stupidly, suggest we just wait inside then to avoid getting locked out.

This kind of seals the deal for me. I should have just said we'll be able to find our way in the worst case, and then just headed out. It would have been so easy at that point to suggest grabbing a nightcap or checking out the new painting I had brought home.

Ack. This girl gave a lot of signs, and was ready to go. Lessons for next time is to hone that killer instinct, and just go for the lay when the moment is right, instead of waiting for a potentially better moment.

Didn't go for the kiss here because I just don't care to kiss without any of the other parts.

---

#4

I leave the party, and head back home. I'm slightly lost, so ask a girl for directions along the way. She immediately comes up very close into my personal space to help me out.

Spoiler

Me: Do you know where X street is?
Her: I don't
<Comes very close to me as she talks
Her: But I can help you look, let me pull out my phone
Me: Thanks so much
<both look at phone for a few seconds>
Me: So how's your night going so far?
Her: Eh, it's so-so, but I'm actually going to meet someone now...
Me: Nice... how would you rate it out of 10?
Her: Umm... maybe a 7 or an 8?
Me: Very cool, so it was a pretty good night... but maybe there was something missing... maybe the crowd wasn't just what you wanted... or maybe you just didn't meet the right person
Her: Yeah... but I'm going to meet someone now... so

The conversation dies down a bit here. She also seems sufficiently drunk that it might be questionable for me to risk it. But had I done it, I think I would have used a present-here in the now-spontaneous frame against the planned out, uncertain expectations.

Something like:

Spoiler

Me: How'd you guys meet?
Her: Gives some answer
Me: Interesting... For me, I've noticed that the connections you make in person... in the moment... where you surrender yourself to the passions of the moment, the feelings you have... the experience becomes so much more passionate, than when you've planned it out, and it feels much more of something you're just doing to do... Does that make sense?

And then used that to try and suggest she cancel the meet. I do think this may have not worked, depending on her level of investment in the guy. But the girl was also very, very in my personal space.

---

Lessons learned from the evening: girls are extremely horny right now. Pulling the trigger needs to be done in a more dominant, and smoother fashion.

I also need to make the opener more low-key, more smooth, and make the girl invest more in me. I gave my name to most of the girls tonight, instead of letting me ask.

Altogether, it feels like it's starting to fall together. I got more practice with trance words, and my verbals continue to improve. I've found some friends who I can actually go out at night with and meet new people, because they're also interested in that.

It's only a matter of time before my dry streak is broken.

 

[Kvothe]

A quick note to myself. No approaches today.

---

I really need to focus on thinking on the girl’s emotions and her mental state. My current mentality is far too self-centered. Things to remember are that the girl I’m talking to is a sexual creature with her own wants, desires to be understood, and to be fucked in a way that lets her feel free to experience all the pleasure.

Must remember the point of all the SOTs, gambits, and verbal improvements are to improve the way the girl perceives the world, how I understand her, and to elicit emotions along the way. The point is not as some key to unlock what’s between her legs.

A difficult but necessary mental shift I need to make.

 

[Kvothe]

One approach today.

Wore dark blue jeans, black chelseas and a black t shirt.

---

#1

Approached a cute girl with the "Do you know who you look like". It was solid, and if I had better follow up, it would undoubtedly have been a hook. She called me perceptive for basically repeating what Bacchus and Gunwitch have written and me copying.

My notes on the improvements are as follows:

Need to improve the conversational shift to SOTs. The issue was I got sidetracked and let the conversation get steered into boring topics, like where we worked.

She asked if I worked in the FBI, in a joking way, because she thought I was perceptive.

At the end, I asked if she wanted to wait a second before continuing, and she did not. I should have made it more of a command:

Me: Hey, just wait a few minutes before you head off

Last note is just to smile. I don't feel like I smiled, which also probably hurt the approach.

---

At least baseline fundamentals, and TRE is making me more relaxed, which is causing girls to respond more positively overall. So my hooking is slowly becoming more consistent.

I need to keep approaching, and relisten to Riker more to get that more internalized.

 

[Kvothe]

Really mentally exhausted today. Haven't slept well last few nights so going to try and rest a bit.

1 approach today on a married girl. The opener I've been using is proving to be a smash hit, every girl I've used it on stops and listens, and the transition to a hook is very strong.

Need to continue practicing with it to make it smoother, and need to shake off some conversational rust. Hopefully some good rest and more Riker will help get that in.

 

[Kvothe]

Went out with @Lobo today. Good stuff having a wing. Able to give each other some constructive criticism and keep social momentum over the evening.

I was wearing a blue floral dress shirt on dark blue jeans. I felt very relaxed, though I do tense up slightly initially on the approach. Almost instinctively, which shows there's still some deeper down trauma to process.

---

#1 Married girl

I sit next to this girl, but after I start talking, I notice she has two rings on, both looking brand new. But I figure it'll be good practice, so I work on persisting the conversation even though she isn't initially interested. I have specifically had issues with not persisting, which causes approaches to fizzle out before I have the opportunity to hook. So this time I worked past that, using the golden question, and then pacing the reality after she said she writes memoirs. Gave good adjectives and descriptions, and she started to open up.

I eventually let the conversation die as she was married, and she wasn't giving too much back to me.

---

#2

Open this moving girl who is super attractive.

Open with "Do you know who you look exactly like?"

She semi-stops, and asks who I think she looks like. As I try to tease this further, she just leaves and says bye.

Happens.

---

#3

Open this two set with Lobo, asking for directions somewhere, and then slowly transitioning the vibe to more conversational. Lobo does a good move and has us move off the street, hooking us in. Unfortunately, we didn't communicate who was going for which girl, causing us both to go for the same girl, and trying to on the fly figure out who is going for who.

We walk with them, and talk, but it's a little difficult to focus on SOTs and transitioning to good topics when having a conversation between 4 people. Something to work on more and figure out. I think stationary two sets are definitely better, but a moving two set that could be transitioned into an instant double date.

---

#4

Open another two set asking for directions. We try isolating a little better, but something turns the girl I'm talking to off and she pivots, taking her friend with her. I'm not sure what it was exactly. I think the pace of my voice was too fast/nervous. I need to focus on bringing pace... slower... more thoughtful... and more deliberate... so that it hooks... and draws my people in.

---

Main Lessons

• Focus on voice tonality and pacing
• Try to calibrate moving openers - some girls will respond well to drawn out, others won't. For the girls that are more in a rush, need to use the ex-girlfriend and without teasing it out in that case
• Persist more, and push even on sets that seem bad, just for practice

Was also successful in using trance words. Will move onto weasel words next.

Possible two-set opener variation of the "Do you know who you look like" courtesy of Lofty

Me: OMG do you know exactly who you look like? Wait... Lobo, doesn’t she look exactly like X?

 

[Kvothe]

Notes from SS Chat today

---

Updated "Do you know who you look like opener" from the SS chats on Sunday

Me: Do you know... who you look exactly like?
Her: Who?
Me: Hmmm..... well.... okay you see the thing is people have mixed feelings about celebrities... so.... most people can't decide if they hate or like someone... if they are famous

then she'll qualify and you can tell her who she looks like. Then change subject to something else.

Essentially, I need to avoid teasing verbally on the opener, I should do that non-verbally, using piercing eye contact and really looking at her.

The goal is to immerse her fully.

---

RPO based on the smell of fresh rain

Me: Have you ever noticed... how the scent of fresh rain in the city... awakens all your other senses... and as you look around, you feel more alive... more present in this moment

"more present in THIS moment" uses "this" as a linking word.

---

Conversation with Bacchus

• Bacchus:
  that helps me write
  Bacchus:
  in a sense it is behavior
• Bacchus:
  but behavior comes out naturally from emotion
• Bacchus:
  like say you hold eye contact with a woman until she breaks
• Bacchus:
  you can tell your brain to do that
• Bacchus:
  or you can just feel an intense connection with her eyes
• Bacchus:
  that makes you want to influence her into a state of surrender
• Bacchus:
  so when you look at her
• Bacchus:
  your eyes
• Bacchus:
  tell her to look down
• Bacchus:
  without any words exchanged
• Bacchus:
  now imagine doing this
• Bacchus:
  when you street stop women
• Bacchus:
  to use interest bait
• Bacchus:
  does that make sense?
• Bacchus:
  what color of eyes in women
• Bacchus:
  arouses you the most
• Kvothe:
  yeah that makes sense
• Kvothe:
  green
• Bacchus:
  from now on
• Bacchus:
  anytime you approach a girl who seems hot from afar
• Bacchus:
  imagine her eyes as green
• Bacchus:
  even if they are not
• Bacchus:
  just act as if they are
• Bacchus:
  trust in the animal inside you
• Kvothe:
  in order to not have to think about holding eye contact with her until she looks down, but in order to feel the connection to her eyes that makes her surrender, and as a result look down
• Bacchus:
  and let it influence your nonverbals