Ambiance's Ascension

[Seppuku]

Hey Ambiance,

Nice to see you are doing mostly fine - apart from the inconveniences of covid 19 response.

I have to say that I couldn't agree more with your thoughts on this one. We responded to covid-19 just as if it was bubonic plague, and it's not. The whole world jumped straight into isolation and shutting down measures without even thinking about basic questions such as economic impact, or "how long can people reasonably accept and abide by social distancing measures", etc... It's like trying to cross the pool underwater while holding your breath, when you do not know how far is the opposite side of the pool. And here we are now, re-opening the economy and easing up measures when the pandemic is as its max.

Let's say this was unprecedented, we had to try, do mistakes and learn from them. Hopefully in the future we won't make the same mistake should this situation happen again.

Some comment on your lifts.

(Bench 275 4x8, Incline 225 4x8, Lats 225 4x8, Curls 65s 4x8, DL 335 4x8, Military Press 75s 4x8, etc)

Congratulations, these are very good numbers. I am myself far behind these numbers (DL 335 1x3, barbell overhead press 100 5x5, squats 265 3x5, and my bench sucks at 165 3x5...) after two years of heavy lifts training. Each time my DL number was hitting a plateau, I found that continuing to increase my squats helped me to break the DL plateau. In a sense, my progress on the squats was driving my progress on the deadlift. I would highly recommend you incorporate squats in your training. For proper squat form, I take input from Starting Strength YT channel - take a look if you haven't already, they have excellent tutorial videos on squats and all the major lifts. Oh, and my favorite YT bearded man is Alan Thrall .

I also read that you hurt yourself on the bench. Not sure exactly what happened in your case. I got once myself stuck beneath a heavy bar after a failed bench press rep... You know, when you have to roll the bar all the way across your body to unstuck yourself... Not fun! Since then, I started to systematically do all my bench press work inside a rack, with the safety pins adjusted just at the right height. I can still touch my chest every rep, but if I fail a rep, I can lower the bar to a position above the upper chest where it rests on the safety pins, and escape. This way I can push my press all I want with no fear of failure. I suppose you know all that, but just in case, it was extremely useful to me. This, and the squats, require access to a power rack though.

Regarding your girlfriend.

First, it is an excellent experience. For as much as these boards are focused on increasing laycount, relationship experience is the most important thing. Unless you want to live the forever player lifestyle, your ultimate fate is to end up in a long term relationship. Learning how to manage her is the best thing you can do. On this, there are many things where game knowledge can help. This is one fine example:

Essentially she became less enthusiastic about sex, and per the advice of this site I immediately pulled away, to which she freaked out. I later got it through to her how much of a need sex is for me, and that I would hate to have to get sex elsewhere but would do so if my needs weren't being met. Well, that fixed it, and sex is back to form.

That was very well played. Making her feel competitive is a nice way of keeping her on her toes, and keep her attraction level for you. Another way, is letting her aware that you have other sexual options, and that you are willing to let her go if it came to that.

She needs to feel reasonably safe with you, but not too safe.

I fully concur with Ray when he says the woman cannot take a step back. This is something to remember for next time. It is better to start slow, with low expectations, then give her steps up progressively. In particular, if you want a polyamorous frame, you need to set the frame very early on.

If you miss variety, see how you can incorporate some discreet, quick flings once in a while. Ideally, when you're traveling away from home. As long as these are not too frequent, and are only short lived, you are not really cheating, as these girls do not really matter to you. I think it is important to keep getting some pussy while on a relationship, it helps you keep the Lover vibe that will keep her attracted to you. Also, satisfying this need for variety will help you stay longer with her. (Note to self: that applies to me as well... I haven't had a new girl since I resumed my realtionship with miss K a year ago. Not good for my frame... I probably need to fix that, once distancing measures recede here.)

It is hard to love someone so much when you know it's not a perfect match. She and I "broke up" several times only for her to run back to me right after following disagreements. It's not fair for me to push her into a role she isn't. I wish she were more open-minded though.

There is no such thing as a perfect match. It's normal to have disagreements, and the "breaking up" back and forth drama is very common. Make sure that sometimes, it is you initiating the "break up". Let her chase a bit and do the work to get back together (if you haven't done so already). It's important that she knows that you could be leaving her for good. Safety yes, but not too much.

Alright!

Take care, Ambiance!

 

[Ambiance]

@ray_zorse

Appreciate the kind words brotha. Thank for referring me to that Mises Institute page, looks like a treasure trove of highly relevant and sane articles. Rare combination these days.

Ended up getting an internship! Did some thinking and realized mortgage companies are probably hiring with how low rates are. Sure enough I was right. Got an interview, went very well, and starting next week. Love when thinking out of the box pays dividends.

Sounds like you and I have a very similar woman situation. I agree monogamy is unnatural, and this had put a strain on my relationship. I don't know if you read Blackdragon, but he has an article (https://blackdragonblog.com/2017/07/27/convert-monogamous-gf-open-one/) about turning a girlfriend into an open relationship, which seems to take dumping the girl and then pulling her back in later but with new rules. Or outright announcing the relationship is open, and ignoring all the subsequent drama. The catch is you don't get the same relationship and your level of intimacy goes down from what I can tell. You're very right about relationships only going forward, and that monogamy requires compromises. If only women could be more practical. It is frustrating to adore someone and get so much out of your relationship and yet be unsatisfied, and while in the relationship so limited in what you can do. 1.5 years into a monogamous relationship, I don't look down on cheaters like I used to.

 

[Ambiance]

@Seppuku

Glad to hear from you. Ya let's hope our insane governments are still able to learn from their ineffective strategies. At the very least people like you and I and others on this site will be able to adjust our expectations knowing the mass delusions plaguing Western culture, and hopefully capitalize on them. I've made a great return pandering to the market and its gut reactions to all this.

You've got a great deadlift for an old man! That's stronger than the majority of guys at my gym. That's a wonderful idea about incorporating squats. I hate them and fear them, especially since I am tall, but should be no harm and potentially great reward for repping 225 on a weekly basis. I don't want to push it, having hurt my back doing them in high school. And about bench, in my experience it takes time to overcome a plateau. I shot up from doing 245 for reps to doing 275, and growth wasn't sustainable. Of course I have a lot of work to do to make up for all the muscle atrophy from Covid... 275 4x8 doesn't seem so bad.

On to girlfriends... It has been the ultimate learning experience. In both learning how to manage the relationship itself, and learning what I want. I know I can't stay exclusive forever, and once it is over plan to never be exclusive again. Flings are something I have entertained but never acted on, mostly due to my moral code... which has changed a lot ever since I gave up religion. The only thing stopping me at this point would be the level of hurt I would inflict on basically my best friend if she ever found out. Which is much less likely while I am out of town, like you said. And excellent point about me needing to be the one to "break up" with her. I actually tried this the other day, and she FREAKED out. I felt awful and the next day did my best to make it up to her. Bit of a learning curve. I was probably too dramatic. Things are good now though.

Thanks as always for all your thoughts!

 

[Ambiance]

SUMMER 2020 GOALS - RESULTS

Successes italicized, failures bolded

Familial
- Spend lots of time with siblings- played lots of ping pong
- Don't alienate father- I couldn't keep my mouth shut, and we had some massive fights about his religion. Lets hope it doesn't jeopardize the money he is giving me for As.
1/2

Financial
- Get a job- Against the odds landed a job within 10 days of returning home. Worked full-time, and orchestrated things to allow me to work remotely from San Diego part-time. I milked this job... got everything they wanted done and then some, but did so in efficient manners that gave me so much free time, of which I spent reading, watching The Sopranos, planning, playing around on Robinhood, and more.
- Make $3k- YTD has me a little over $4k, not counting cash I got from a few side gigs and my investing gains.
- Minimize spending- Went out to eat more than I could have, and spent a decent amount helping my girlfriend fly out to see me, but I'm gonna call this a success. Saved a lot of money using unscrupulous methods, and when I did spend money I did not do so in excess.
3/3

Personal
- Master Plan- It's growing and growing... helps I have my Mission more or less down. Still needs a lot of proper structurizing and applicability. The plan is to merge it with all my other numerous plans. One of these days I will get around to it.
- Journal/Timeline- Did a fair amount of journaling. Didn't add much to prior years on my timeline but I did maintain it.
1/2

Physical
- Return to max strength (Bench 275 4x8, Incline 225 4x8, Lats 225 4x8, Curls 65s 4x8, DL 335 4x8, Military Press 75s 4x8, etc)- Bench is still well below my old peak, partially due to hurting my shoulder and taking a few weeks off to heal. Lats are as strong as ever. Curls need more work. Didn't deadlift at all. Military Press is so close to being back where it was. Tricep extensions need some work. Mixed results.
- Track calories daily- Didn't happen. Once I am doing my own shopping again I plan to get back at it.
- 120 oz water daily- Mostly successful.
- Hit 12%BF- Went in the opposite direction. Gave in to my gluttony. I am the fattest I have been since high school. It sucks. Can't wait to move out and restart my proper food plan.
- Cure skin affliction- Didn't happen. I am such a jew about getting in as many hours as possible at work. Will have to do this during the Fall.
0/4

Recreational
- 500 albums- Complete! I now consider myself an authority on music. I blew past my goal and ended up over 530 albums down. Also blew past 5000 tracks in my music library. The new guard of my music includes Moonsorrow (of which have a 5 star and three 4.5 star albums, my second strongest band), Emperor, Death, Vektor, Slayer, and Opeth. Anyway, 750 here I come, although I want to slow my pace down and enjoy what I have added.
- The Sopranos- Got through 3 seasons. Excellent show, already one of my all-time favorites. My progress got interrupted by restarting Breaking Bad with my girlfriend.
- 2 books- I read a lot, but no actual books.
- 3 movies- Think I watched one movie on my list?
- Completely beat Skyrim- I probably have the single most powerful unmodded account on this entire planet, barring accounts that used game-breaking glitches like the super restoration potion "feature". I could not find anything online with stronger stats. To achieve this, for any Skyrim nerds reading this, I used a combination of falmer helm/circlet, necromage, azhidal gear, notched pickaxe (don't think it helped but whatever), sallow reagent perks, max ench/alch/smith, and creating gear then using that gear to create more powerful gear til it capped out. I also leveled up past 250 to get every perk, found every location, did virtually every quest. Later in the summer got into Fallout New Vegas, which I'll have to completely beat someday.
3/5

Relational
- Have girlfriend visit- We had a blast reuniting in SD (I had to fly out to make arrangements for my stuff), a second honeymoon phase staying at my mom's, and some trouble in the mountains. The past 6 months, many things have been made ready to me that she and I can't last forever. Some of these reasons include her pathetic and despicable stepfather, her religious beliefs, her anxiety, some health problems, too much drama, and my own need to go out and start conquering again. I broke up with her earlier this summer while she was in CA, telling her I was bad for her, and thinking I could turn her into an MLTR down the road, but felt awful after and got back together. Then in the mountains, confronted with school going full remote and all my apprehensions about our future, and her picking up on it, she started probing and I opened up about all my reservations. She was shell-shocked and thought I was breaking up with her again. We battled it out late into the night before concluding our love is still too strong to let us go separate ways. I am so torn. I know it has to end sometime, but I also love being with her and can't accept her not being in my life. She would be so devastated too... I'm not ready to do that to someone I care this much about. So, I continue to enjoy our relationship, and postpone my goals.
- Take her to amusement park- Wasn't feasible. Not the best goal. Gonna exclude.
1/1

Social
- Go out once a week if feasible- Didn't happen, partially due to Covid, partially due to stagnation.
0/1

OVERALL: 9/18 or 50%. Not bad but not good either. I am very excited for the future however. Like I mentioned, I secured working for my company remotely, and I am going to milk it (while still doing a good job for them!). I am also highly organized with school, so should I follow through I may be looking at a fat $15000 check in a few months. Wouldn't it be so nice to get straight As my last semester of school ever?

Many other things are coming together, including me refinancing my student loans, lifting as intensely as ever, playing the stock market and pulling in a nice profit, continuing to develop my music library. Last but not least, I am moving out of my dad's FOR GOOD! Oh, how liberating this will be! I still won't be living on my own but hopefully I get a job after college that will change that. I have so many plans for once I am out. And in hopefully four months I will have everything he owes me, and for once in my life he will have no power over me. For once my parents' involvement in my life will be contingent on their treatment of me and their respect for my boundaries. What a concept.

Alright, that should wrap it up.

 

[Ambiance]

FALL 2020 GOALS

Familial

• Secure car
• 2019 taxes

Financial

• Graduate
• Get 5 As, and by extension $15000
• Maintain working 20+ hours/week
• Secure high paying job
• Refinance loans

Personal

• Finish Master Plan
• Finish Timeline
• Get my own room
• Hit 400 on Reminders
• Handle speeding tickets

Physical

• Up by 8 every day
• Lift 4x/week
• Fix skin
• Hit proper amount of calories/protein/water
• Swim/tan and read weekly

Recreational

• 600 albums
• 5 movies
• 2 books
• Finish The Sopranos
• Limit Youtube and Reddit

Relational

• Maintain strong frame

Social

• Go to a party

 

[Ambiance]

Bored in class right now, so might as well do an update!

Familial
No progress on my car, but that is ok. Will take care of next time I am back home. I did get my 2019 taxes finalized, so nice to not have to worry about that anymore.
Financial
School is going okay - I am mostly on top of things and actually ahead in all my classes for once. Have had a few hiccups but should handily get at least a few As. Maybe even get straight As. I have never gotten straight As in college. I have a plan for each class, so should I follow it and do my best I could finish out finally hitting this elusive goal.

Beyond that, I am working about 25 hours a week, from home. It is a joke. I barely do any work and listen to music or watch shows while doing so. This is one part of COVID I absolutely love and will try to preserve as much as I can. Additionally, I refinanced my loans, and continue to save thousands using the method I have more or less perfected while shopping.

Last but not least have been having a great time in the stock market. I've been doing credit spreads for consistent, strong growth, and am up over 33% for the past few months.
Personal
Finally have my own place along with my best friend. We got it month to month so we can upgrade once I am out of school and working a better job full time. It is very liberating to not be living under someone else's roof. And living with my friend is great, but will want my own place once I am more financially secure so I can really set up my systems and be totally organized. Got a lawyer for both of my speeding tickets, which I may not even need since my state hasn't even scheduled a court date for either, the bureaucratic clusterfuck it is.
Physical
Have been eating much healthier lately. My friend is very disciplined about this stuff, and I have been a sponge, picking up new recipes that are easy to make and healthy. I am regaining my pre-Covid strength too. In some cases, such as my back, I am stronger than ever. Have my own gym membership for the first time rather than using my dad's country club or my school. Also, connived my way into getting a keycard to this deluxe pool. This should give me indefinite access to an excellent lap pool and a resort level main pool whenever I want. Pretty proud of myself for this one
Recreational
As always, hitting recreational goals poses no challenge. Already broke 600 albums, and knocked off over 5 movies from my list. Honestly could bolster these numbers even more if I was less apathetic and more driven in the morning while I work. Also deleted Reddit from my phone, which has proved to be a great decision. Still need to get back into The Sopranos,
Sexual
My relationship has been WONDERFUL lately. We are so very much in synch. Been having lots of very passionate sex, and making each other laugh all the time with very few fights. She just rocked my socks off for my birthday, getting me a bunch of great stuff and taking me to a terrific sushi place. I in turn have been very adept lately of hitting her needs, emotional and sexual. I know her so well at this point and know just what she needs from a man to be actualized.

All that said, we are in the midst of a pregnancy scare. Stressful stuff. I still have reservations, but concede it is very possible she could be pregnant. We have already talked about what happens then, and are on the same page if it comes to that. Whatever happens, my pullout game needs some work. Got some very strong swimmers...
Social
Living with my roommate has been grand. Other than that, am barely social.

 

[Ambiance]

FALL 2020 GOALS - RESULTS

Familial

• Secure car- this has no longer become necessary, since I am receiving a new car from my dad! It is a graduation present. SO thrilled... want to get something that will last me most of my 20s and that's a little faster than my current ride
• 2019 taxes- Completed, and used to get my first stimulus check, which I almost doubled in Robinhood over the past semester by writing spreads.

2/2

Financial

• Graduate- This has been accomplished, although there is one hiccup I found out about today where the school never received a loan I took out. Freaking out a bit, hope this can be rectified. Beyond that, all I will say about graduating was that it was seriously underwhelming.
• Get 5 As, and by extension $15000- Got three, and the other two were Bs, so we'll say I partially completed this. The A money from my dad takes care of all debts I owed him and then some. I am almost to the point where I am financially independent of him, something I have wanted for years.
• Maintain working 20+ hours/week- This was easier than I thought it'd be. Unbeknownst to my company, I moved to SD and used COVID and school as an excuse to work from home. I also was able to disable any location trackers on the computer they had given me, not that I ever gave them reason to be suspicious. Even worse, I finessed things to make it seem like my workload was more time-consuming than it actually was, so I only worked maybe 2 hours a day, yet was paid for 25 per week. Once I graduated I quit and used a convenient Thanksgiving trip to return my laptop, leaving them none the wiser.
• Secure high paying job- This I completely dropped the ball on, and am suffering for now. I NEED a job ASAP. I have already had to pull my Robinhood money out as well as go into some credit card debt. A couple surprise expenses didn't help either, including my computer screen breaking for no reason. I have a good amount of funds in a few IRAs, but would be loathe to take them out for tax and financial reasons, leaving me in a very tight place right now. I have overestimated myself, and need to get some income soon before it gets any worse. I may have to take the hit to my ego and accept something outside of my grand vision, at least until I can get my head above water
• Refinance loans- Completed. Knocked off 4% on all my private loans, which is huge. Once I get a job and improve my credit a bit I will do this again.

3.5/5

Personal

• Finish Master Plan- I really got to get around to this. Right now while I don't have a job is the perfect time to do this. We'll see, it is pretty daunting...
• Finish Timeline- It still needs some work but for all intents and purposes is done.
• Get my own room- Completed. The first place I moved into had some serious problems, but we found a new place that I am loving and hope to live in for awhile. It is so nice having my own room...
• Hit 400 on Reminders- HAH. What progress I made was overshadowed by a litany of other tasks and goals, putting me all the way up to the 550 area. That said, I am probably more productive than I ever have been (other than finding a job), so hoping to turn the corner and reduce the cognitive load it takes (a boy can dream!)
• Handle speeding tickets- done all I can here. California still hasn't given me court dates on either.

3/5

Physical

• Up by 8 every day- this is so difficult. My alarms blast everyday at 8 (and 8:05, and 8:10, etc.), but I am so damn stubborn. I ought to start insisting on being in bed by 12, or maybe even earlier
• Lift 4x/week- Didn't miss a single time. This coupled with my new diet have lead to me being the strongest I have ever been, other than with deadlifts which I have neglected thanks to the retarded masks we have to wear (though at least my gym is open unlike so many others...). I am latpulling 225 4x8, long rowing 205 4x8, military pressing 80s 4x8, benching 275 4x8, incline benching 235 4x8, doing tri extensions for 200 4x10 upright/15 bulgarian, and more. My weight is over 230, much of which is muscle.
• Fix skin- went to a new dermatologist but they didn't help. SO frustrating. I don't have the cash to keep trying out incompetent dermatologists right now.
• Hit proper amount of calories/protein/water- did excellent here. Living with my best friend/lifting partner helps keep me accountable. I have also picked up a bunch of meals and techniques from him. I FEEL so powerful these days, and it is solely due to the foods I eat (and don't eat). That said, I completely pigged out over the holidays, and this set me back a bit
• Swim/tan and read weekly- the state closed our freaking pool down... so my tan is nonexistent. I miss this so much. Fuck the Western world and their insolent approach to the virus.

3/5

Recreational

• 600 albums- got all the way to 666 (fuck yeah!). As of writing this am at 675. Bumped a new album to 5 star status, Moonsorrow's Kivenkantaja, an epic and wondrous wintry pagan masterpiece. Recently bumped Emperor's In the Nightside Eclipse to 5 stars, putting me at six, but this was after fall had ended
• 5 movies- completed. The Thing and The Silence of the Lambs stood out the most.
• 2 books- completed. Read a fantasy book and Hitchen's god Is Not Great. Both were excellent.
• Finish The Sopranos- finished! Amazing show. Maybe the best finale I have ever seen. Most inspired and chilling portrayal of death I've seen in any medium.
• Limit Youtube and Reddit- deleted Reddit off my phone, which helped, but spent a lot of time on Youtube unfortunately.

4/5

Relational

• Maintain strong frame- Had a pretty damn good semester with my girl. We are still so very close and intimate, even as our relationship approaches the 2 year mark. I know her so well at this point and can give her strongly consistent and positive emotions, which is almost all a girl could want for. I do this by hitting a potent balance between stoic, reserved masculinity and playfulness. My style works so well with girls like her. I still wonder what is in the cards for our future, especially with everyone still freaking out over the virus.

1/1

Social

• Go to a party- didn't happen. I never hit any of my social goals! Might put them all on pause until the rest of my life is in a better spot.

0/1

OVERALL: 16.5/24 or 68.75%. Substantially better than last semester, with plenty of room for improvement. Now that I am out of school, my quarterly goals will be December, January, and February for Winter, and so on in increments of 3 months for each season. Perhaps this will adapt to the normal business quarterly schedule, but for now the months selected for are what the four seasons should actually be. It also irritates me that the year can't start on the Winter solstice, which would make much more sense. The world has so many inconsistencies, many enabled by religious beliefs. Someday, if I can somehow manage to extend my lifespan, I hope to see everything brought to order.

Anyway, so concludes a chapter of my life, one both protected and restrained from what the world has to offer. I am truly on my own now. Able to forge my own destiny, though I may also be swallowed by it if the past 6 weeks of not looking for a job mean anything. I remain a dreamer, but it is time to wake up and make dreams into reality.

 

[Hue]

Sounds like you're doing pretty well overall man!

On the getting up early thing: maybe this link could help you?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJeE8nBZrpw

 

[Ambiance]

SPRING 2021 GOALS

Familial
- See my siblings
- Arrange car details

Financial
- Get a finance job paying >$60k
- Pay off credit card debt
- Refinance loans again
- Start building emergency funds

Personal
- Living draft for my Master Plan (LT vision, building blocks, rationale)
- Figure out living situation for after lease expiry

Physical
- Bench 385
- Bench 405!
- Leg Press 1000!
- Start up monitoring calories again
- Start new skin routine
- Establish 8am wakeup time

Recreational
- 750 albums
- 3 books
- Instigate hard rule of no games or YT or similar before 12pm

Sexual
- Start approaching every time I'm out and about
- Keep relationship secure

Social
- Go out with best friend every weekend

 

[Ambiance]

Finally I get to write up this update! I have been waiting to hit a long time milestone before doing another entry. This accomplishment has taken over four years of intensity, discipline, and strategizing. I've never worked so hard for something, a reality that has both positive and negative connotations. So, without further ado... I benched 405 lbs!!!

Guess this means I don't need a personality anymore, right? In all seriousness, I am so beyond pleased with myself. I remember back in high school, lifting with my football team. I was on the line, so it was expected that I'd have a good squat. I trained like crazy, and after 2.5 years I worked my way up to 405 pounds. I remember vividly how crushing that weight was on my back, how hard I had to exert to get the weight back up after dropping into a squat... And even though my coach counted the rep I did, it wasn't pretty, I could have gotten lower... Now, 6 years later, I can BENCH 405. Four plates. No spotter, no gear (physical or supplemental), no lifting my butt off like some guys do or arching my back like I'm an aqueduct... I don't know the last time I've been this ecstatic. I actually did it.

The rest of my lifts are going, as you might guess, exceptionally well. Last week I lat pulled 280 lbs for a set of 8. I actually broke the machine two weeks before doing 260 4x8, which was scary yet hilarious. I'm going to see if I can get the rack, 300 lbs, for a set of 8 today or tomorrow. To think it wasn't long ago doing 225 for sets of 8 seemed daunting. I guess I haven't mentioned, but I hit my Spring Goal of leg pressing 1000 pounds a bit back as well. Recently did somewhere between 675 and 750 (not sure how heavy the sled is) for SETS of TWELVE, so I could probably get a higher max if I wanted. I've also gotten back into deadlifting, now that I have a gym that is both open and doesn't require masks. After over a year off, not only was I able to get my old max but I added 20 pounds to it, bringing it to 465. I attribute this to how much stronger my legs and back have gotten. I am currently 250 pounds at 190cm. I plan on hitting a 500+ deadlift, trying a few other feats of strength, and then cutting to 225. Don't like having a belly

Beyond working out, I've dug myself into a gaping pit. I've put off looking for a job, gone into significant credit card debt, and my credit score has dropped. My lease expires in May and I probably won't be able to renew. I need to get my shit together, and fast. I also haven't hit any of my other goals, other than hitting 750 albums and actually working on my Master Plan for once. My relationship also isn't what it used to be, though I'll talk about that in a separate entry.

In short, life is about to become a whirlwind. Many changes are coming. I have everything planned out to become monstrously successful, from creating a foolproof daily routine to mapping out what to do with my eventual income to determining how to proceed with my relationship and women in general. I am poised... and now that I've hit my long term obsession of benching 405, it is time I sprang to action.

 

[Ambiance]

SPRING 2021 GOALS - RESULTS

Familial
- See my siblings- I didn't get to have them out like I wanted (my parents can be so difficult), but came home before the season ended.
- Arrange car details- didn't happen, largely due to factors outside of my control. Will be moving this goal to my summer plans

Financial
- Get a finance job paying >$60k- Well, I finally did land a job, and it is one I am excited about, but making $60k+ is not guaranteed since it is a sales job. I'll be making a little over $40k base salary, which I can survive on, and I am extremely motivated to succeed. There is so much I want to do and have, and it is essential I start now. I do not have the luxury of messing around in my 20s, not if I am to become an elite and survive long enough to hopefully extend my lifespan, the single most important thing to me. I know it sounds like science fiction, but I believe it could be possible within my lifetime, and I need to at the very least be ready. There is little point to life if it isn't on your terms, ultimately, and having the choice of when life ends is crucial to mastering one's own existence. Anyway, this isn't the place to go into more detail, but the point is I have a literal life or death push to make, and this job I've selected may be just what I need. No cap on commission, potential for massive growth within a niche, eventual location independence. Not to mention sales experience for future endeavors. I am very excited to start, and put forth a true effort I have never given to anything, even my passions.
- Pay off credit card debt- another reason to work my ass off at this new job. I have accumulated quite a bit of this, not to mention my student loans. I have some funds I may liquidate to do this, so I can start ridding myself of the student loans immediately.
- Refinance loans again- will have to do this over the summer or possibly later, depending on rates and what my income looks like
- Start building emergency funds- once I am out of credit card debt and have consolidated my student loans, I will start directing a portion of my income to this

Personal
- Living draft for my Master Plan (LT vision, building blocks, rationale)- made some progress here, having income and direction with my new job will help.
- Figure out living situation for after lease expiry- I am out of my old apartment but don't have a new one yet. This is one of my top priorities. I am deciding between finding a roommate and enjoying a nice 2b/2b, or getting a nice studio.
BONUS: Quit porn- I started up my attempt at eliminating porn from my life, and made it a full month, but I couldn't get this one ridiculously sexy porn star I discovered before quitting out of my mind, and she reeled me back. I'm trying out a new idea, where I can watch porn one day per month. We'll see if I can maintain that

Physical
- Bench 385- yep.
- Bench 405!- I am a fucking demigod
- BONUS: Deadlift 500- completed!! Thought there was NO WAY this was on the horizon back when I set my goals, after taking about a year off thanks to COVID and subpar gyms and masks. I got back into deadlifting following my bench milestone, and to my surprise 405, once a milestone that took months and months to get to, was EASY. I attribute this to how INSANELY strong my back/legs have gotten, as well as the 30 lbs I put on. Being me, I tried 495 (five plates), not expecting to get it (old max was 445), but to my surprise I got it off the ground. The next week I had a grueling session, the week after that I easily got 465, and the week after that I got 475 fairly easily and decided to go for 500 (yes I added 2.5s to each side). It was incredibly difficult, but channeling my breaths into a berserker-like frenzy and having my friend there recording was enough to get it! I held it for a few seconds after locking out, hoarsely whooting like an idiot. Man alive, that felt good. I know a 500 deadlift isn't on the level of a 405 bench, but I am super proud of myself anyway.
- Leg Press 1000!- covered this, could probably do it for 3-5 reps now
- Start up monitoring calories again- dirty bulking made this unnecesary, though I will start this up once I have my own place and cut down 20-25lbs.
- Start new skin routine- created the routine but didn't implement it yet. Will do so once I have my own place again
- Establish 8am wakeup time- tried very hard at this, but poor discipline combined with living with a friend who likes to stay up late stymied my efforts. Now that I will be living on my own and working, will try at this again. They key for me is to be asleep by 12 at the earliest.

Recreational
- 750 albums- hit this easily. I have slowed down though, and want to coast to 1000, then slow down even more as I enjoy what I have discovered.
- 3 books- only read one. Once I have thoroughly pursued my music, TV show, and movie leads, I will have a lot more time for reading.
- Instigate hard rule of no games or YT or similar before 12pm- did ok at this. Some days I held to it, other days not so much. I think I will stick with the rule. I also deleted the YT and Reddit apps from my phone, which helps

Sexual
- Start approaching every time I'm out and about- did a little bit of approaching, but not nearly enough.
- Keep relationship secure- along with my job update, this is the main part of this post. I am going through the 2 Year Drop. I am questioning my commitments to this girl, this angel that changed my life and shared so many magical days with me. The emotional side of me wants to hold onto her forever, stubbornly out of the love I have for her. The rational side of me wants to keep her around a bit longer while I get situated, and release her, since I don't see an ideal future with her and don't want to waste her time or have her get in the way of things I must do. Either way, it sucks. If I give into my love, I lose much of the future I want. If I leave her, I seriously hurt her and myself, and knowing me, never fully get over it. It is this quirk about me, where I do not accept certain things. I'm still furious with myself for losing my high school crush, for instance. I understand why it happened, and don't even think we would have lasted, but not getting something I desperately wanted kills me. Losing my girlfriend would leave a deeper scar than the high school girl. Here's a girl who is exactly what I want in so many ways, and I got her and made her mine and had so many blissful times with her. I let my guard down, and heavily bonded with her, and by the time I started seeing things I wasn't okay with it was too late. I will be so bitter if after all the magic I have felt it doesn't work. I know there are fantastic girls out there for me that are more in line with what I want, that I could love as much as my girlfriend (though honestly I don't want to fall in love like this again, it is such a huge weakness). But my emotions don't want to hear it, and the few times I have broken things off with my girlfriend after refusing to submit to something, my emotions take over and I get her back. So something has to give. Either I give up my ambitions and settle with a girl I adore but has some problems, or I take a massive hit to my psyche. I can't keep dragging her along in this purgatory of a relationship I have created. It's killing her.

Social
- Go out with best friend every weekend- failed. Not entirely my fault, as he is a bit of a homebody, but we should have at least gone to the beach more while he lived in SD. Now that he is gone, I am going to make time to go out on my own.

OVERALL: 7/20= 35%
Pretty lame, though the things I did accomplish were massive achievements I will carry the pride of doing the rest of my life. And I did get a job, which was the most pressing of my goals. Tons of room for growth, and hopefully now that I have most of my immediate future figured out I can hit more goals this summer.

 

[Ambiance]

SUMMER 2021 GOALS

Familial

• Have siblings out

Financial

• Possess UTMA account
• Pay off WF credit card
• Submit 5m volume
• Fund a loan
• Convert to Roth
• Refinance student loans
• Balance transfer ccs
• Get CC debt below $4k
• Establish secondary source of income
• Pay tickets
• Figure out collections

Personal

• Secure residence
• Master Plan

Physical

• Read and implement Buff Dudes cutting book
• Get to 240 lbs
• Maintain lifting 4x/week
• Implement daily skin regimen

Recreational

• Finish Archer
• Rick and Morty S5
• 800 albums

Sexual

• Maintain relationship
• 1 side piece

Social

• Go out with coworkers

 

[Hue]

Sup dude.

I'm also at a cross roads with my girlfriend in the near future. Luckily I kept it OLTR and that's probably why I'm okay with the drop happening.

I'm like... 9 new lays since March? I think.. idk I'd have to go back and check. It definitely helps with the "losing her" aspect. I just have come to realize that feelings do in fact go away and then the cold rationality of the relationship comes in. Most girls, when dating an alpha, are gonna want marriage and relationship progression.

I'm just keeping us at OLTR and will continue to refuse the next milestones of progress in the relationship (moving in, getting a pet, getting a kid) when they come up until she can't take it and breaks up with me. In the mean time I'll discreetly fuck girls on the side and take girls to have threesomes with us (two down so far (; ).


Nothing wrong with a relationship ending... it doesn't make it a failure. Just know that HOW you end it will decide how she feels about you afterwards. Breaking up with her when she wants progress will make you someone who "wasted her time". Whether you care about that or not... well that's you dawg.


Hue

 

[Ambiance]

Sup dude.

I'm also at a cross roads with my girlfriend in the near future. Luckily I kept it OLTR and that's probably why I'm okay with the drop happening.

I'm like... 9 new lays since March? I think.. idk I'd have to go back and check. It definitely helps with the "losing her" aspect. I just have come to realize that feelings do in fact go away and then the cold rationality of the relationship comes in. Most girls, when dating an alpha, are gonna want marriage and relationship progression.

I'm just keeping us at OLTR and will continue to refuse the next milestones of progress in the relationship (moving in, getting a pet, getting a kid) when they come up until she can't take it and breaks up with me. In the mean time I'll discreetly fuck girls on the side and take girls to have threesomes with us (two down so far (; ).


Nothing wrong with a relationship ending... it doesn't make it a failure. Just know that HOW you end it will decide how she feels about you afterwards. Breaking up with her when she wants progress will make you someone who "wasted her time". Whether you care about that or not... well that's you dawg.


Hue

Hey man! Smart of you to keep it OLTR... I'm glad I've had the committed, exclusive relationship for reference point reasons, it's been very educational, but in the future will definitely be switching to solely non-exclusivity. At least on my end, that is.

9 lays in ~3 months? Sounds like you're killing it! I've been with a respectable amount of women, but still have ways to go to be that consistent. That's awesome you're getting threeways with your main. I've gotten my GF to entertain the idea, but only when I get her really horny and she always reverts back once the endorphins wear off

Seems like you are doing well. Miss your journal posts! Especially the LRs, they're always a fun read.

 

[Chase]

@Ambiance,

Props on the new job. Sales is an incredibly valuable skill to learn. At times frustrating, like many things, but the better you get at, the more you get a skill you can use absolutely everywhere.

Those lifting goals hit are no joke!

On this:

- Keep relationship secure- along with my job update, this is the main part of this post. I am going through the 2 Year Drop. I am questioning my commitments to this girl, this angel that changed my life and shared so many magical days with me. The emotional side of me wants to hold onto her forever, stubbornly out of the love I have for her. The rational side of me wants to keep her around a bit longer while I get situated, and release her, since I don't see an ideal future with her and don't want to waste her time or have her get in the way of things I must do. Either way, it sucks. If I give into my love, I lose much of the future I want. If I leave her, I seriously hurt her and myself, and knowing me, never fully get over it. It is this quirk about me, where I do not accept certain things. I'm still furious with myself for losing my high school crush, for instance. I understand why it happened, and don't even think we would have lasted, but not getting something I desperately wanted kills me. Losing my girlfriend would leave a deeper scar than the high school girl. Here's a girl who is exactly what I want in so many ways, and I got her and made her mine and had so many blissful times with her. I let my guard down, and heavily bonded with her, and by the time I started seeing things I wasn't okay with it was too late. I will be so bitter if after all the magic I have felt it doesn't work. I know there are fantastic girls out there for me that are more in line with what I want, that I could love as much as my girlfriend (though honestly I don't want to fall in love like this again, it is such a huge weakness). But my emotions don't want to hear it, and the few times I have broken things off with my girlfriend after refusing to submit to something, my emotions take over and I get her back. So something has to give. Either I give up my ambitions and settle with a girl I adore but has some problems, or I take a massive hit to my psyche. I can't keep dragging her along in this purgatory of a relationship I have created. It's killing her.

You will find, once you've dated a bit more and your experience goes up, that:

• Women are a lot more adaptable than you think, and even if they hurt for a while post-breakup, even if you were a truly amazing man for them, they bounce back. A few years later she'll be dating another incredible guy, and he'll be crazy about her and wanting to wife her up, and you'll realize that's the relationship she was always destined for in the first place and be happy for her
  
  
• Your emotions will calm with age and romantic experience. This one will probably throw you for a loop for a bit, you'll deal with it, then you'll shag a bunch more, then happen upon some other great girlfriend, whom you can't imagine now because it's all abstract, but when you meet her she'll be great. Possibly hotter than this current girlfriend and possibly better in other ways. And you'll reach a point where you look back on the high school dream girl with blasé emotions... especially if you see pictures of her somewhere and see she's aged and older now and she's got her own husband/family... then she's not the nubile, fresh girl from high school anymore but just another wrinkled 30-something with kids and saggy tits and cellulite

All these strong emotions are mostly a thing of youth, that go away with age and more experience.

Once you've gone through it a few times it stops having the same effect, and the emotions toward past women calm.

Of course, for now, you're still going to go through it... and you will still feel those emotions while you feel them.

Chase

 

[Ambiance]

@Ambiance,

Props on the new job. Sales is an incredibly valuable skill to learn. At times frustrating, like many things, but the better you get at, the more you get a skill you can use absolutely everywhere.

Those lifting goals hit are no joke!

On this:



You will find, once you've dated a bit more and your experience goes up, that:

• Women are a lot more adaptable than you think, and even if they hurt for a while post-breakup, even if you were a truly amazing man for them, they bounce back. A few years later she'll be dating another incredible guy, and he'll be crazy about her and wanting to wife her up, and you'll realize that's the relationship she was always destined for in the first place and be happy for her
  
  
• Your emotions will calm with age and romantic experience. This one will probably throw you for a loop for a bit, you'll deal with it, then you'll shag a bunch more, then happen upon some other great girlfriend, whom you can't imagine now because it's all abstract, but when you meet her she'll be great. Possibly hotter than this current girlfriend and possibly better in other ways. And you'll reach a point where you look back on the high school dream girl with blasé emotions... especially if you see pictures of her somewhere and see she's aged and older now and she's got her own husband/family... then she's not the nubile, fresh girl from high school anymore but just another wrinkled 30-something with kids and saggy tits and cellulite

All these strong emotions are mostly a thing of youth, that go away with age and more experience.

Once you've gone through it a few times it stops having the same effect, and the emotions toward past women calm.

Of course, for now, you're still going to go through it... and you will still feel those emotions while you feel them.

Chase

Thanks for visiting my journal! I am loving my sales job so far. It is so fun to take a prospect and hurtle over any objections they have. My years as a seducer and reading your articles have given me a serious edge so far, so my thanks to you there. Once I am out of debt, I plan to buy your entire The Dating Artisan, both since it is great material and as a token of my appreciation.

What you detailed out about women's adaptability helps my thinking a lot. On the one hand, I don't like the idea of any other guy being able to provide a better relationship to my girl than I can, both out of pride and genuine belief. On the other, knowing she'll be eventually quite happy if we part ways is comforting. I'll miss her greatly in any case, and I guess I'm not ready for that yet. Until then, I'm trying to be less teasing and more loving with her to make up for my reluctance to pass commitment points. Also employing some of your ideas of growth, like getting into a hobby together (in this case hiking).

Hope you are doing well traveling the globe! If this gig I've landed works out, I'll be able to join you in doing so while working remotely. You're an inspiration Chase, and I hope to meet you someday!

 

[Chase]

Cheers, Ambiance.

Sounds like you're off to a great start with the sales job.

The thought behind more joint activities as the relationship draws to a close is nice, but be aware of potential deeper motives behind it.

I did this with at least one early relationship and I've seen other guys do it. The guy's conscious position is always, "Well, this'll probably end, but I can help give her a gentler end to it," and he tries to compensate for his lack of relationship progress by doing joint stuff with her.

But the girl's not stupid; she knows the relationship isn't really progressing, and all the ski trips, country drives, restaurant meals, etc., are more like a long goodbye. Eventually she starts to get salty about it, because what is the point? If this isn't going anywhere, why is she doing all this stuff with you?

Then you have to ask yourself why if she's getting saltier and saltier you're having her do all this stuff with you, instead of just letting her go.

All part of a learning process though. You'll get through it.

Good luck with the sales. I'll see you once you're trotting the globe

 

[Hue]

Hey man! Smart of you to keep it OLTR... I'm glad I've had the committed, exclusive relationship for reference point reasons, it's been very educational, but in the future will definitely be switching to solely non-exclusivity. At least on my end, that is.

9 lays in ~3 months? Sounds like you're killing it! I've been with a respectable amount of women, but still have ways to go to be that consistent. That's awesome you're getting threeways with your main. I've gotten my GF to entertain the idea, but only when I get her really horny and she always reverts back once the endorphins wear off

Seems like you are doing well. Miss your journal posts! Especially the LRs, they're always a fun read.

And counting dude lol I bagged 2 more since posting that. Having a ball out here!

Yea I think it really depends on the girl and it also depends on how secure she is with you in the relationship / if she thinks you might end up liking the other girl too much. Has been a problem for me 100% and requires a ton of reassurance.

I'll be posting a massive update soon, I think. A lot has changed.


To Chase's point above its important to watch how much we compensate in our relationships. It seems rational to try and "balance" things out but a lot of times in a girl's head they don't ever want a need in the first place for "rebalancing", especially to counteract lack of commitment. They see through it, and then tie it to a motivation they see as negative (your "selfish" lack of commitment - which is counter to their "selfish" desire for commitment).

I've made mistakes though and caught myself. So instead of doing things like gifts or new activities (unless we both just want to do them organically) I decide how I can sprinkle in 1% more commitment, like meeting a family member other than my parents... and knowing I've got a limited reserve of my "commitment bank" before I've reached my maximum with this particular relationship. Keep them following the candy trail until you run out of candy....


...and eventually she finds a guy with more candy to offer, eats all of it, and gets fat lol.

Hue

 

[Ambiance]

SUMMER 2021 GOALS - RESULTS

Familial

• Have siblings out- didn't happen, though talked with both often

0/1

Financial

• Possess UTMA account- my defining character trait is not wanting to be controlled by anyone. Finally having my own funds in my own hands rather than my parents has been a long time coming.
• Pay off WF credit card- was so satisfying. 2 cards to go.
• Submit 5m volume- I broke $5M yesterday, 9/1, so technically failed this. However, the fact that I have broken $5M in submissions already is astounding. I have 5x the volume all the other new guys have combined. I knew I would succeed at this job but I didn't realize how quickly and to this extent.
• Fund a loan- this was an unreasonable goal, as I had to learn the business and it takes 30-90 days to get a loan to funding
• Convert to Roth- pushed off for now
• Refinance student loans- massive success! Got all my private debt under 5%. Once I pay off my credit cards and get my credit score high again, I will re-refinance and maybe even break 4%.
• Balance transfer ccs- score wasn't high enough
• Get CC debt below $8k- was orignally $4k but this was unreasonable. I didn't reach my revised goal however, mostly due to having to live out of a hotel for a month.
• Establish secondary source of income- put this off for now in favor of dedicating downtime to learning my company guidelines. Having broken $5M in submissions before my third month with the company was up, I'd say this was the right choice.
• Pay tickets- got one dismissed and had to pay the other. I haven't had a speeding ticket in over a year despite going 20+MPH over the majority of the time. I attribute some of this to Waze, which I've set up to alert me when cops are reported near me
• Figure out collections- these may pop up in the future but I got one struck off my credit report, and the other hasn't been posted

5/10

Personal

• Secure residence- current place is cheap for my city, month-to month, has access to a great pool, hot tub, and apartment gym, and is in a great location that's near work and my girlfriend's school. The downside is it's a loft and I have to share a bathroom. My roommates are wonderful though, two girls and a guy. One of the girls keeps the place immaculate and has even done my laundry for me a couple times, and expects nothing in return. The guy is very nice and nerdy, so I enjoy having someone to play chess with and talk movies and gaming. I'll stay here until I am out of credit card debt.
• Master Plan- made progress, not done yet. The idea is to make it a living document, but I still need to clean it up

1/2

Physical

• Read and implement Buff Dudes cutting book- put off for now, but am eating healthier/less and doing cardio on the regular
• Get to 240 lbs- put off for now
• Maintain lifting 4x/week- I've gone from the majesty of benching 405 to hurting my shoulder and not being able to do sets of 315 without it flaring. I had to take 6 weeks off, and am slowly building to heavier weight using dumbbells rather than the bar. At least I was able to keep doing my back/bicep and leg workouts
• Implement daily skin regimen- it's not daily right now but an improvement. I started using facial moisturizer

0/4

Recreational

• Finish Archer- such a tremendously witty show. Also highly consistent in quality, which is rare for a show spanning 11 seasons. An all-star cast too. RIP Jessica Walters, maybe the funniest woman I've come across. Excited for s12.
• Rick and Morty S5- the most inconsistent season yet
• 800 albums- I am going through a Golden Age of Music. Moonsorrow is at the helm. I have yet to get into their first album, but the following six range from being among the elite albums in my discography to being tied for my favorite album of all time. Voimasta, Kivenkantaja, and Verisakeet all receive the rare 5 star rating from me, with Havitetty virtually there and Varjoina and Jumalten Aika being elite 4.5s. No band has resonated so hard, so consistently. Emperor has reached top 5 band status with their unrivaled Nightside and Anthems. Nokturnal Mortum's masterpiece The Voice of Steel is practically 5 star status. Edge of Sanity's Crimson as well. Not to mention all my old favorites that are as wonderful as ever.

3/3

Sexual

• Maintain relationship- is there such a thing as a third honeymoon? She has been wonderful lately. I think me getting my life together and getting busier helped with that. We had no more than a spat all summer. She has started bringing snacks and gifts again, and sends me doting messages and wants me cumming in her again.
• 1 side piece- it has been too long since I had some fresh pussy. While this didn't happen, I am not conflicted anymore.

1/2

Social

• Go out with coworkers- joined a beach volleyball league with two of my coworkers. It was a blast, and I am miffed at myself for not doing this with my best friend while he was in town, especially since he is 6'7" and loves volleyball. Will definitely be making league sporting events like this a part of my life.

1/1

Overall: 11/23

This summer was all about getting my footing and getting momentum at work. I have gone from wondering when I will get serious about life to pulling nation-wide accounts out of thin air and gunning for not just 6 figures but high six figures. I want to make at least $100k as a 24 year old, and I want to make at least $300k as a 27 year old. I LOVE sales, it comes so naturally to me. Business is essentially just a big game of Catan, and I am a god at Catan.

 

[Ambiance]

FALL 2021 GOALS - RESULTS

Familial
- See family- got to visit over TG
- Sell car- after years of reliable service, my GS300 finally gave out. I'd been meaning to get a new car for some time, so this impetus wasn't minded. Got a decent salvage value out of it too. So glad I ended up not having to transfer the title to my name, would have been very complicated due to an emissions problem and old title being out of state.

2/2

Financial
- Fund a loan- Was a little one, but I'll take it!
- Fund $2.5M- I almost did this in November alone. Funding a little under $2.5M/month is six figures, so not bad for not even 6 months in! I know I can average $2.5M and beyond... I'm gonna be making so much fucking money for someone my age.
- Fund $5M- Had a great September and solid November but a wanting October... someday soon I will fund $5M in a single month
- Pay off a credit card- I won't be receiving the commission funds needed for this until mid-December anyway, but 3 weeks of driving a rental car put me even deeper in the hole.

2/4

Personal
- Get new car- ended up getting a 2018 Q60. What an upgrade from my old ride! This beast is sleek, so fast, has the whole package, and is very comfortable. My parents footed most of the bill as a graduation present
- Figure out housing- a hilarious misunderstanding resulted in a bedroom opening up in my current unit, which I jumped on. I am finally free of that loft, and my new room looks great now that I have all my stuff (including a TV gifted to me and PS4 I bought with my first commission check.
- Get items out of storage- The move from the loft to the room ended up saving me money now that I'm not paying for storage on top of rent. Also, with all the moving I've done the past 4 years, I've gotten very good at it. This was my easiest move yet. A nice dolly, ladder, and toolset was able to "schmuggle" Ser Davos Seaworth style helped

3/3

Physical
- Exercise 6x/week- this was probably my biggest let down of the season. A combination of shoulder injuries, loss of direction, and complacency resulted in averaging close to 1x/week. It is so hard coming down from the highs I reached in the spring. I wonder if I'll ever bench 405 again...
- Get under 240- at the peak of my bulk I was 260. While I am now under 250, I have lost considerable muscle and am still closer to 250 than 240. My successfully reduced caloric intake was neutralized by drastically decreased fitness.
- Improve grooming- I can grow a damn nice beard, but never had anyone teach me anything about grooming, so I always resorted to clean shaven or stubble. Well, I finally looked into it and refined my craft enough to sport some sexy facial hair. My gut may be larger than ever, but my face looks damn good (especially in conjunction with below)
- Use lotion- finally I have begun to use moisturizer and other skincare products. I could be more consistent about it, but my skin feels much better now. I am glad to get into this in my 20s rather than 30s or 40s, gotta preserve my youth!

2/4

Recreational
- 850 albums- first time I haven't hit a music goal! Part of this was my favorite site for downloading broke, and I don't listen to music at work as much since I'm always on the phone.
- Read a new book- finished a 10 book series. The novel was 600+ pages, but didn't stop me from cranking it out within a day! Might be a personal record.
- Get into South Park- binged the first 9 seasons. What a fucking hilarious and clever show I've been sleeping on!

2/3

Sexual
- Keep relationship strong- the majority of the season was fantastic for my relationship, especially once I got my own room and we had more privacy for fucking. I even got her some nice jewelry out of appreciation of how good things had been. However, lately the sex has been dropping off in frequency. I'm sure my physique is part of it, and she is going through the ringer with her grandfather who just died and her practically undead grandmother who just won't die. We are also at 3 years of monogamy, and I've slowly learned her sex drive is lower than I initially thought from when we were first dating... I resent being the one to almost always initiate things. She is my best friend and loves me so much, I can't imagine life without her. But I can imagine a descent into an increasingly sexless relationship, which is unacceptable for a guy like me.

0/1

Social
- Visit best friend

1/1

OVERALL: 12/18= 66.6%, not bad. I've gotten my life pointed in the right direction and have taken the first steps. Now I just need to turn it into a jog. I'm going to pay down all non-strategic debt, then start saving and eventually investing. I want to be a millionaire by 30, deci-millionaire by 40, and centi-millionaire by 60. These numbers may go up with how bad inflation will likely continue to be.