Self-improvement of Wes

[ray_zorse]

Cool. I just remembered there is a club around the corner from Gaspanic (=Gasupani in Japanese) called Green Land. That's also good, I think there is a small cover charge for guys but it's much less crowded and music and drinks are fine. Maybe you can move a girl to there if she isn't ready for the pull yet. I also like a Chinese restaurant that is on L2 opposite Gaspanic and about 100m back towards the station IIRC, a bit hard to see but there's a small sign and a staircase. I have pulled girls to both places, although I had no game (pre GC) and both resulted in FU, it's easy to get makeouts tho. I think probably the most unattractive guy on Earth could pull from there I usually go by myself tho a few times I went with girl friends.
cheers, Ray
PS There is also Gasupani in Shibuya, it's near Hachikou statue, walk across major crossing towards Starbucks I think... its a basement club and it's smaller than Roppongi, very loud, haven't had such good results but it's still fun.
Edit... Another tip: Chat to hotel staff particularly the night staff. They will be keen to practice English. At some point, tell them you are meeting your GF later and ask if she needs to register. Provided you booked a double room this will be fine and she won't need to register. Then you can take girls to your room without funny looks from the staff (maybe overkill though).

 

[Mr. Wes]

@ray dang dude, thanks for the tips!

-----------

So I feel so good right now because I finally had the chance to go out in town and explore. I approached and talked to one Japanese girl and it went really well. By the time we finished talking it was dark outside and there were nobody else to talk to. All the college girls went home.

So here's what happened:
I was walking down a main road in order to keep myself from getting lost and I started by nodding and saying konichiwa to strangers. Some said it back, others ignored me. I got stared at a few times by kids (who just walk around by themselves here because it's so safe) people generally avoid eye contact so I was a little afraid to break out and speak to people.
Then I came across this grocery store/clothing store and I went inside to check it out. Walking around the store were so many pretty girls in uniforms with knee- high socks and short skirts. I wasn't sure if they were in high school or not but they're cute either way. I kept seeing so many girls with thick volleyball player legs (which is a huge turn on for me) and I tried not to stare too much.
I avoided talking to at least 5 or 6 girls out of fear of what people around me would think.
I didn't want to offend the Japanese people by hitting on their women.
Then I left and walked further down the main road to this train station.
This gorgeous girl who was about my height and looked my age caught my eye and I couldn't take my eyes off of her. She was so pretty, so sexy. Again, volleyball girl legs, knee high socks. They all seemed to be in the same uniform like they all just got out of school. This girl noticed me looking at her and it seemed like she was giving me a death glare. I wanted to say "sumimasen" and talk to her but then she ended up splitting up and going down another road. I wanted to go after her but was still frozen from approach anxiety.
Went up an escalator and BAM! Two girls on the escalator with me. One in front who had the sexiest hips I've seen all day and another behind me who was a bit skinnier and was adorable as hell. Such abundance here! I love it!

Back home I was picky as hell and didn't get a lot of practice because I only tried to approach girls I was attracted to. Here, I can't walk block without some cute girl being in my radius.
Another thing that kept me from approaching was that nearly all the girls had earpbuds in so I was a little afraid of bothering them.
Then finally I see this cute girl with straight hair down to her shoulders, a beanie, same uniform, knee highs, and a short skirt, with earbuds in her ears. She turns and walks down this alley. There was nobody else around so I jumped on the opportunity. (And I didn't want to come home and not have a FR with an actual approach.

I walk after her and catch up

Me: sumimasen! (She doesn't notice me yet) sumimasen! (She looks through the corner of her eye) sumimasen! (I motion for her to take her earbuds out) I need help. (She stops)
Me: kawaii desu. (If said wrong I could've actually said "I'm scared" or "you're scared" or something. I might have actually said that by accident.
She looked confused so I said it again.
She smiled and kept walking. I kept walking with her.
Me: O-namae wa nan desu ka?
Her: Myu! (I thought she said Maya at first)
Me: Watashi wa Wesley. (I say it in a Japanese accent so she can understand because the "l" sound isn't in their language and hard for them to pronounce so I say: Weserry
She stops.
Me: do you speak English?
Her: a little (in Japanese)
Me: I can only speak a little nihongo so gomen nasai.
Her: ahh, (says something in Japanese. Then she starts investing and asking me questions)
Her: (in really good English. Her English voice was so cute) how old are you?
Me: oh! That was really good! How old are you?
She looks confused and looks like she is thinking.
Her: how old are you?
Me: you tell me first.
Her: (confused)
Me: you. How old. Are you?
Her: 18. You?
Me: 21.
Her: ohh so, so, so, so, so...
Me: lol hai so, so, so, so, so...so are you...in college? (By this point I'm speaking slow so she can understand but it's also creating some really nice tension as we look in each other's eyes. I can tell she's locked in and not going anywhere. She seems fascinated by me.)
Her: hai! Are you in college?
Me: ehh kinda. (I tell her what I do but she's confused)
She asks me more questions in English about where I'm from and what I'm doing in japan and I answer. She asks me if I'm studying Japanese. I tell her a little but I mostly know things from anime.
Me: do you like anime?
Her: Attack on Titan.
Me: ahh hai! Shingeki no kyojin! Give me a fist bump!
(She smiles but looks confused)
Me: fistu bumpu! (Holding out my fist) (she pounds it)
Me: yea, where I'm from we do that when something is sugoii
Her: ahh sugoii awesome, cooru! (Cool)
Her: what anime do you like?
Me: just that and one piece.
Her: ohh.
Me: can I have... Your number?
Her: (smiling shyly) I don't... Give my numbers to strangers...(speaking Japanese) this is different. I'm scared.
Me: you? Scared?
Her: smiling shyly
Me: you...don't be scared...I'm nice person.
Her: (smiling) you should find another girl.
Me: hai but kirei desu.
Her: (blushing) arigatoo
Me: you are very pretty.
Her: you should find prettier girl. Perhaps prettier girl is around.
Me: I know it's weird...that I came an talked to you...in my country...in order to make friends...tomodachi...we have to talk to strangers.
Her: do you have friends where you stay at?
Me: yes... no Japanese friends though.
Me: we should be tomodachi.
Her: hai (nods)
Me: fistu bumpu! (Holds out fist) (she pounds it and laughs)
Me: nice...to meet... You.
Her: hai hajimemashite
Me: hajimemashite. Nani my namae?
Her: Wessery!
Me: good! Fistu bumpu! (She pounds it again and giggles)
Her: I have to go home now...
Me: nice to meet you.

And she leaves.
Afterwards I realized that she probably wasn't rejecting me completely she was probably just being polite. Maybe the fact that she invested into having a conversation showed that she was interested. I was too nervous and excited by the whole experience that I didn't pick up on usual signs that I see. If I kept trying I could've gotten something. She seemed to like me. I just needed to lead better. Maybe gave her a reason to give me her number like asking her on a date. I forgot.

Oh well. There's always more. There's an abundance of girls out here.
And now I have an idea of what sentences I need to learn in Nihongo next.
I need to learn how to ask girls on dates, basic bantering, deep diving questions, and many different ways of complimenting.
I'm not a fan of language classes that teach me a bunch of useless things that I wouldn't use. I try to find out how to say things I'd actually say and things that fit my personality. Also complete immersion and making mistakes and in no time the language barrier won't give me any trouble.
Already many people keep telling me my pronunciation is very good so I'm getting there.

Wes

 

[ray_zorse]

Approach...
Konnichi wa! Totemo kawaii to kizuiteru kara, hanasanakereba ikenakatta! (Hi! I noticed you are totally cute, so I had to talk to you!)

Introductions...
Ore wa Wezeri-... anata wa? (I'm Wesley... as for you?)
Namae wa nani? (What's your name)
(her name)chan! Hajimemashite (Pleased to meet you)
Yoroshiku (Please treat me well... response to hajimemashite)

Asking on dates...
Ko-hi- o nomi ni ikou (Let's go drink a coffee)
Nanika o tabe ni aou (Let's meet to eat something)
Konya, hima? (Tonight, are you free?)
Ashita, tsugou ga ii? (Tomorrow, is it convenient?)
Itsu, tsugou ga ii? (When is it convenient?)
Asa (morning) hiru (midday) yu-gata (evening)
Denwa bango o oshiete (Tell me your phone number)
Me-ru o okuru ne (I'll send you a message eh)
Me-ru o okutte ne (Send me a message eh)
Sukeju-ru o morattara me-ru o okutte (When you get your schedule send me a message)

Logistics...
Kono chikaku sundeiru? (Do you live near here?)
Ashita ju-ji koko ni aou (Let's meet here tomorrow at 10 o'clock)
Chikaku no Suta-bakkusu ga aru? (Is there a Starbucks near here?)

Banter...
Hmm, dunno... would be great to learn some chase frames in JP, if u do then let me know.

Compliments...
Suteki na pia-su shiteiru (You have nice earrings on)
Suteki na ko-to o kiteiru (You are wearing a nice coat)
Akai ko-to o kizuiteru (I noticed your red coat)
Heame-ku wa subarashii (Your hair and makeup is fantastic)
Totemo takakute gouka da yo. (You are totally tall and gorgeous)
Ashi ga eroi yo. (Your legs are sexy... hahaha threw this one in for you... maybe OTT... I dare u to try it)

Deep dive...
Gakusei? (Are you a student?)
Nani o benkyou suru? (What are you studying)
Nande (blank) o eranda no? (Why was it that you chose (blank))
Kore o tsuzukeru tsumori? (Do you imagine continuing with that?)
Hontou wa, nan no shigoto shitai? (Really, what work would you like to do... maybe u can use "dono" or "donna" instead of "nan no", I'm not sure but I doubt it makes a big difference)
Maji de? (No way, really?!)
Seikatsu no yotei, nani? (What's your life plan?)

Uhh this is just a bit of stuff I thought up momentarily, if u have specific needs I can help or ask one of my teachers... note I never say "desu" and I use "ore" for me and "chan" for her... props on approaching, you did great!!!!! Hammer it out

cheers, Ray

PS Way back when, my JP GF and I giggled a lot over this page, just found it again... I like the last one
http://www.ghettocitiesclothing.com/languagehelp.html

 

[Mr. Wes]

Whoa! Some of those words have the usual tricky pattern that is still hard for me to pronounce. I seem to only have trouble with words that have double vowels like: "ao" or "ae" and such. It makes my mouth feel very awkward and I like to smoothly say things. I'm going to write the phrases down, take them with me and practice.

I think I'm going to practice on everyone not just cute girls so I can increase my practice with approaching/gaining momentum and Japanese. I know I don't have to know the language to pick up the girls but they seem to really appreciate it when I try and open up more.

I need to know how to say phrases like: I would like to practice Japanese with you.
Thanks for the help Ray! I'm off on another adventure today!

Wes

 

[PrettyDecent]

Wes!

Japan, hey? You've got this man.

My experience day-gaming in Japan - direct openers in English never worked. I eventually crossed over to opening by asking for directions or situational openers in English with slightly better results.

I think if I was gaming in Japan again, I'd change my tone of voice to act really cheerful and smiling during the approach. Being a foreigner speaking fluent English is intimidating to these girls (especially if your tall, or muscular, or some non-JP trait).

Also, I noticed with the girls that I hooked well and were inviting themselves over to my place, there was not much, if any, rapport built. But that also could be because I was naturally screening out women who needed rapport because I couldn't speak enough Japanese.

Keep us updated, bro.

~Nick

 

[ray_zorse]

Issho ni renshuu shiyou (Let's practice together)
Gengo no suwoppu shitai? (Do you want to do language swap?)
Gengo no pa-tona- ni naritai? (Do you want to become language partners?)
Motto nihongo o oshiete kudasai (Please teach me more Japanese)
Ore to eigo no renshuu dekiru (You can practice English with me)

Kill it for me, I'm real envious, did not have benefit of GC last time I was there, so have not done any cold approach!

cheers, Ray

 

[Mr. Wes]

@pretty decent. Thanks man! Will do
@ray arigatoo gozaimasu

-----------

I'm back from another adventure but only temporarily. I came home to rest and I might go back out tonight.
So today I went with my class on a "field trip" just to understand how to use the train station and get places. I went with this couple to Yokohama and we went out to eat and accidentally found ourselves in an underground mall.

I only approached 3 girls today. The first two were together in a convenient store. I saw them staring at me then quickly look away when I caught them. They walked around the store and stopped at the cold drinks refrigerators. I walked over to them, said sumimasen and then eigo wakarimasen? (English understand/speak?)
They start getting really giggly and can't believe I'm talking to them. They reply: a little.
I tell the shorter girl that I think she's pretty, she says thank you and then I ask her name.
She giggled nervously and said yeaaa... Then she turns towards her friend and didn't answer.
I ask again...she says: yeaaa in an awkward voice and turns away.
I take it as she doesn't want to talk to me so I leave.

Kinda frustrating how shy girls but I'm going to keep trying. I just need to find the ones who are comfortable talking to gaijins I suppose.

The next girl was working in a clothing shop in the mall. Me and the couple were walking pass and she called out to us from standing inside the store saying good morning! In Japanese.
I waved back and then walked over to her.
I ask her if she likes foreigners and she says yes. She seems really eager to meet me.
I ask her her name. She replies by showing her name tag: Haruna
I tell her mine and we both half a half English half Japanese conversation. I pick up a couple more words from her.
She's asking me all sorts of questions like where I'm from, where I stay at, etc.
Then I ask her for her phone number. She says she doesn't remember it and doesn't have her phone on her.
She tells me I should come back and I say that I'm coming back to Yokohama on the weekend. I say that she better have her phone next time. She laughs.
We say hajimemashite and we part ways.

Other than that there were many many girls walking around the train station that I wanted to talk to. Many in the mall. Just everywhere I go, there's eye candy. Don't her me wrong there are fat girls here but they're rare. And some others have weird facial features. Some have pissed looking cat eyes so I feel like they're giving me a death glare. But I definitely have a "type" here.
One thing I noticed is that even though they try to ignored strangers they can't stop the natural human habit of showing curiosity. I picked up on the approach invitation here.
Before they avoid looking/or staring at me, they see me first and then turn their eyes away. Others use their peripherals and stare straight ahead or stare down to the floor. The girls who are interested look at me first, eyes widen a bit when they catch me looking back, and then they turn their eyes away quickly.
I'm going to test things out and approach these girls out and see how it goes.

So far I haven't gotten any numbers or moved a girl or any results to show for but it's gradual. I'll get there.
Im just hoping that they know my intentions because so far it seems like that hasn't been communicated.


That's all for now.
Wes

 

[Mr. Wes]

I'll keep this one short.

YOU CANT GO DIRECT WITH JAPANESE GIRLS.
Well, you probably can, if you're the right person but it very unlikely.

Over the past few days of going out, I've approached a few girls here and there.
What I found was that going indirect works (thanks prettydecent)
But also when I show my intentions, it's like they get into auto reject immediately and come up with an excuse. Every girl so far with some similar excuse like: I have to work, no free time, after the holidays.
Also no jp girls seems to have a working phone. Wtf? (This might be their excuse not to give their number out)
Instead I got this girls email to which she never replied. Lol whatever.

So I'm just going to chalk cold approaching jp girls as a waste of time and effort until my game is beastly.
Instead I'm going to spend my time at jp clubs and "meeting" types places.
I'm planning on going to Roppongi at some point and going to the gaspanic club that Ray_zorse told me about.
So far gaijin hunters are the most receptive. I've gotten a girl to move to a couch with me in this mall.
I've also used the opener/excuse to take a picture with a cute girl dressed in a sexy mrs.Claus mini dress.
She had rely good English too. But unfortunately I didn't get far with her.

Lastly, aside form jp girls, I've been practicing with a few girls I work with.
I've planted seeds in the mind of this awkward white girl and now she sees me as a sexual person but she seems intimidated and nervous and insecure around me. She keeps apologizing for saying things and keeps saying: I know that sounds weird, I'm sorry. And just basically trying to qualify herself to me.

Feels good being on the receiving end now.
I've also noticed that it's becoming more natural for me to touch girls when I interact with them.
I find myself holding their waist.
Leading them by the small of their back
Touching their thigh (while we sit) when making a point
And sometimes when I'm feeling bold (I've done this over the summer to the girl I dated)
Grab and massage the back of their head.
It's almost as if I can't help it and their body is calling out to me to be touched. It would be shame if I didn't.
I definitely feel an intimate comfort when interacting with girls I find attractive.

Although, lately I feel like I'm in a slump or mini depression. I'm just not really trying to have as good of dialogue as I usually have. I've been hardened and I'm starting to care less about having meaningless small talk and "go-know-where" bantering. I've been so direct with sexual innuendos and ramping things up just to get into more interesting topics.

That's all for now (before this post grows too long)

 

[PrettyDecent]

What I found was that going indirect works (thanks prettydecent)

Interesting to hear that worked for you, too!

So I'm just going to chalk cold approaching jp girls as a waste of time and effort until my game is beastly.
Instead I'm going to spend my time at jp clubs and "meeting" types places.

I'll admit, the girls in Tokyo were pretty difficult to stop on the street. I'm convinced there's a way to make it work...just not really sure what it is, and I was still pretty inexperienced when I was daygaming there. Your idea is probably a smart one considering you want to get some real results with your (short, I'm guessing?) time in Japan.

On a somewhat related note, what are your logistics like over there?

~Nick

 

[Mr. Wes]

What I found was that going indirect works (thanks prettydecent)

Interesting to hear that worked for you, too!

So I'm just going to chalk cold approaching jp girls as a waste of time and effort until my game is beastly.
Instead I'm going to spend my time at jp clubs and "meeting" types places.

I'll admit, the girls in Tokyo were pretty difficult to stop on the street. I'm convinced there's a way to make it work...just not really sure what it is, and I was still pretty inexperienced when I was daygaming there. Your idea is probably a smart one considering you want to get some real results with your (short, I'm guessing?) time in Japan.

On a somewhat related note, what are your logistics like over there?

~Nick

Actually I'm going to be here for 2 years...maybe more if I want to extend my time. If at anytime you want to come visit, that'd be awesome.
The logistics...well I'd have to get hotel wherever I go because I stay in the country and i go far to go to all the fun places.
I'm about to post up what happened tonight. Found a cool little town one train stop from where I stay.
What's seeming to work is indirect direct actually.
I ask some question like: what does *insert compliment here* mean? And then they answer. Then I wait for them to get it.
I'm still having trouble communicating. The girls keep making excuses and avoiding the subjects I really want to talk about.

 

[PrettyDecent]

Actually I'm going to be here for 2 years...maybe more if I want to extend my time. If at anytime you want to come visit, that'd be awesome.

Ah damn man, that is quite a bit! Cheers for the invite, brother. Japan really is such a beautiful place. I've pondered living there for a couple years more than once. You'll have to tell me (us) a bit more of the backstory behind you swinging to Japan for so long..!

The logistics...well I'd have to get hotel wherever I go because I stay in the country and i go far to go to all the fun places.

Love hotels, my friend!

What's seeming to work is indirect direct actually.
I ask some question like: what does *insert compliment here* mean? And then they answer. Then I wait for them to get it.
I'm still having trouble communicating. The girls keep making excuses and avoiding the subjects I really want to talk about.

Oh, I could see that opener working. I've always found Asian girls a bit bashful...I wouldn't think the effects of overt sexual talk would be rewarding - of course, coming from my limited repertoire of Asian girls I've slept with (and of the 4 I've slept with, 3 weren't really traditional Eastern kind of gals, though all 4 still grew up in Asia). Guess you'll crack the code, though!

~Nick

 

[Mr. Wes]

Tonight, me and my roommate were going to go to Yokohama but instead stopped in this cool little town one stop away from where we reside. We explore a little. Walking the streets in what seemed to be the heart of the nightlife. Bad bitches errywhere. Jp girls wearing the skimpiest outfits I've seen since I've been here. High heels, high dresses, super short shorts...AND it's chilly outside. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK.
So we stick around and then come across this pirate themed bar. We peek in the windows to see what the interior is like.
Bunch a hot jp girls all over the place. We are getting super excited and then get ready to leave. Turns out they saw us and came out calling for us to come inside. They were super excited that we were there and got us a table.
I'll try to keep this short because I'm tired and I don't want to bore with irrelevant details.
There were maybe 3 other jp men in the bar drinking. The rest were jp girls wearing the skimpiest outfits.
They tried to give us drinks. I refused saying that I wasn't drinking tonight. (Trying to work on nightgame without liquid courage). My roomate got pressured however, into getting a drink. Lol
So they give us some free appetizers and then I'm talking to all the girls around the room in the little Japanese I know. (25+ phrases or so) the first girl to give us attention was this chubby girl named Aiko or something. I kept forgetting their names. I made her sit down next to me and had a conversation with her talking in Japanese and sometimes slowed down English. She'd answer in Japanese, which does NOTHING for me because I don't understand common responses to my questions. Plus they always speak too fast. A jp man in the bar could speak decent English and understand us so he took the role as the translator. I got a lot of bantering done and touched her back a lot with my arm wrapped around her but she seemed uncomfortable and had a gap between us. Eventually, she got bored and drifted away...it's hard to communicate.
The next girl, (forgot her name) was a lot hotter. She was wearing a cheetah print mini dress and had an awesome body. She was beautiful. I sat her down next to me and did the same thing, this time trying to ask her out but she was flighty and really drunk and difficult. It was her 21st birthday apparently. She was wasted...saying all kind of Japanese jibberish lol. I got her to kiss me on my cheek and take a few pictures with me.
Another girl, Manami, came out from the back...she was by far the hottest so far. She wore knee high boots and a mini dress that was so short, I could see her panties every time she bent forward slightly. She had some nice lacey frilly underwear on and just watching her strut around turned me on so much. I made her sit down by me.
This time I was more touchy. I got her to kiss my cheek (after she turned her face away when I tried to kiss her) and this was all simultaneous while we conversed and went back and forth with a translator app on my roommates phone. It took us forever to get to the point where she understood that I was trying to take her out after she was free from work. She made some excuse but I pressed on. Then she told me that she had a boyfriend. Eventually she drifted away. I kept rotating between the 3, bringing them back one at a time, trying to move forward with one of them.
Blah blah blah, long story short, a new lady came walking in. She was by far the hottest one of them all if not matched up with Manami. She greeted us and then I eventually pulled her over to sit with me.
Same thing went down except this time I was speaking slower and giving her intimate eye contact and there was definitely sexual tension there. She got up a few times to do her job and then I stood up and took a picture with her kissing me.
Then I grabbed her by the waist and pulled her back down to sit with me. This time I placed her on my lap. Or it's almost like she placed herself there. I was just going to place her next to me but she drifted to my crotch and we kinda just landed like that. I held her in my arms as she sat on my lap and she faced me and we talked silently together in intimate voices.
From talking I learned that she was the owner of the bar. The rest of the girls call her Mama because she's the oldest. She said she was 26 then changed her mind and said she was 23. LOL.
She was investing a lot and asking me a lot of questions about where I'm from and so on.
I'm just rubbing/massaging her thigh and getting a boner on her ass.
I try to move her over to the part of the seat closer to the wall so she's locked in but instead she ends up in a reverse cowgirl position sitting on my crotch. I place my hand up her skirt and on her thigh, rubbing around, moving closer to her pussy. She places her hand on mine as if to control it. She then Seems to start grinding/humping her ass into my crotch to feel my boner or something and life is just great.
I want to kiss her really bad or move her or something. My roomate was ready to leave (he wasn't getting any) and he asked for the check. Figuring out logistics is hard because these girls can't understand what I'm trying to do. There's no "hook up culture" in this country so they're oblivious to fact that I'm trying to isolate them.

When we're leaving, we're saying all of our goodbyes and the mama girl keeps asking if we will be back. She finds a card with the bars mobile number on it and tells me that's her number. Awesome.
I get a kiss from her one last time and then one from all the other girls and then we leave. (On the cheek. All on cheek the entire night...good compliance)

Later on, after talking to some other gaijins about the bar, they say that that bar is full of girls who are paid to act like they're into you.
Haha what a disappointment IF that's true. But I seemed to be the only guy getting as far as I did in there. No other man had girls all over him like I did. Plus the mama seemed really into me... So hopefully my intuition is right when I'm thinking she wants to fuck.

I seem to making progress little by little with these jp girls. I'm going to crack this code, I swear! Lol
Instead of trying to ask girls to go on dates with me or go with me, I'll just lead and pull them.

That's all for now. Tomorrow I'll have a story of an approach I did to a gaijin girl in the clothing store.
Hopefully going to Tokyo tomorrow. That's all for now, peace.

Wes

 

[Mr. Wes]

I've been meaning to write a few days ago but I've been too lazy. I'm having a lot of fun and keep getting home late/spending all my time on other things.

Last week I approached an obvious foreign girl in a clothing store.
I hesitated at first not because of approach anxiety but because I wanted to achieve a certain goal or play to win. I didn't want to approach for the sole fact that I thought she was cute, I wanted to learn something new from the experience. I went over in my mind what opener I should use...maybe direct...but that frames me as a chaser...maybe indirect...but it doesn't show my intent or interest. So I just went with what I always go with here: "do you know what kawaii desu means?"
Indirect direct. But it went weird because she honestly didn't know what it meant. So I worked with it and told her after getting her to answer a few questions. I taught her two Japanese phrases and shook her hand to introduce one another but it became clear from her body language that she was very uncomfortable and wanted to escape (body language looking like she wanted to walk away) after asking the beginning platonic general questions about what everybody probably talks to her about, I draw attention to the bluntness of my opener and her obvious lack of comfort to show that I'm socially conscious. I even cold read that she is seeing someone which is why she felt unsure about our interaction. I explained myself saying: I'm just blunt...I wanted to see if you were a cool person...are you a cool person? She froze up like she didn't know how to answer.
Me: haha you're not like a murderer, are you?
She smiled and said: maybe
Asked her a couple more questions, she answers them then BOOM...she hooks. She starts investing by asking me a question but I wasn't present enough to notice and I dropped the ball. (She asked where I was from. I look familiar. Turns out we saw each other at a party the night before)
The point is, she hooked and I consciously noticed it right after the fact and learned from it that I should pay more attention. I wrote the interaction down immediately to transfer it to my journal when I got the chance.

Next was another foreigner from California. Leah.
A cute short Filipina with a unique style of boots, a skirt, a sleeves shirt revealing the sides of her boobs being covered by a sexy black lace bra. She had long black hair down her back and a sexy walk.
We were both in the Tokyo towers gift shop area and every time we passed each other we made eye contact. I couldn't tell if she was Japanese or not but I thought she may have been interested since most Japanese look away immediately when making eye contact. She I finally approached in speaking Japanese and asked if she spoke English. She was about to answer back in Japanese but then quickly switch and laughed: yea, I speak English.
I told her I thought she was cute and she had a cool style and then she was asking me a bunch of questions. We joked and talked and I told her to hangs out with me sometime. She agreed and told me she'll only be here til Jan. 10th. She told me that she doesn't have Japanese cell phone service so in order to text she uses an app which requires wifi and I should grab her dad's number instead. I ignore her and take her number (I should've gotten her dad's as well)
Then I give her mine.
Then she says she has to go. But it was awkward because she wasn't gone yet and we kept running into each other around the Tokyo tower. I'd just say hi and keep going about my business. Then my your group finally left to check out the Meiji shrine. I also accidentally ran into her again there. Her tour group was following mine everywhere lol.
I texted her the same day but it fade to deliver and continues to fail every time I try to contact her. I should've taken her dad's. Welp! It can't be helped. Moving on.

Another day I was on the train and saw a pretty hot Japanese girl sitting across from me but I couldn't see her face. Her body was bangin though. When we got off at the same stop, I chased her down and opened her asking if she spoke English. She could and then we had the usual getting to know each other talk and she gave me her contact information and invited me to party with her the same night in Roppongi. I ended up not going but I texted her and we exchanged a couple texts.
She hasn't replied back yet to the last text I sent her asking her about her partying endeavors.

Then we have part 2 of the pirate bar. Me and my roommate went back the next night and the girls were just as excited as the the first time. They got us a table and "Mama" immediately sat down next to me with her drink and we talked. I pulled her onto my lap and she sat there as we talked using a translator on her phone. I somewhat deep dived her a bit but translators kinda sabotage what both of us are REALLY trying to say to each other. They're of little help.
I joked to her that I was going to bring her back to my country as my Japanese wife and she agreed saying we will have pretty mixed babies. I was rubbing her thighs and feeling her up which she didn't seem to mind and then I started to push it. I was getting so turned on by the attention she was giving me that I had a huge boner pushing into her ass and then I had the bright idea to start throbbing it on her to see if she could feel it. I wanted to see if she'll get turned on by knowing that she was giving me a boner.
My roommate told me later that she looked uncomfortable which explains why she left to "work" with other customers and serve drinks and shit. But she wouldn't come back whenever I called her or any other girls to sit with me. It's like she told all the other girls about it and they all are cautious of me. The only one who kept sitting with us and giving us attention was the one chubby girl working there and we obvious weren't attracted to her.
We ended getting bored and left.
We tested the bar out one last time last night and once again they all ignored us, brought us drinks and part to give others attention. So I think I offended them/scared them away.
We are probably not going back and switching to this Hawaiian themed bar in the same area.
I haven't gone yet but maybe the girls will all be in hula girl outfits. Hopefully just as hot.

So what I learned from my experience with Mama is that even though I'm turned on and ready for sex to go down, doesn't mean the female is ready yet. You gotta build them up and make them horny.

When I recall to all the times I was able to successfully DO that, I had to sacrifice my feelings of horniness in order to build theirs. When I almost lost my virginity to my female friend, I got her so turned on but I wasn't feeling it and as a result was having an anxiety attack from when I was uncontrollably trembling.
Then all the other times I got girls horny were always behind the screen of a computer or over text. I haven't actually done it face to face with a girl. But I've always gotten horny in front of them.

So now my current goals is to do this. I wanted to visually see a girl get horny (from my verbal escalation...because I've done it with touch many times it it's not the same)
I've gone as far as sexual innuendos verbally or talking about sex but I've never done the same tactics I use over text or through skype (that got girls stripping for me)
Who knows how long it's going to take...

that's all for now. If anybody who happens to be reading this and who happens to know about getting with Japanese women, feel free to comment. Turns out when I converse with them, we are on two separate pages. I think I'm showing clear enough interest but they keep deflecting everything as if we're going to be friends or language exchange buddies.
Should I just outright learn how to say in Japanese: I. Want. To. Fuck. The. Living. Shit. Out. Of . You.
Is that clear enough?

Seriously. That's all for now.
Wes

 

[PrettyDecent]

Wes,

Looks like you had Mama going quite well there in the beginning!

Here's what I'd be doing if I were you - I would take up those offers with the girls who want to be friends/language exchange partners. All of them.

Once you've grabbed their numbers/contact info, you can start screening the ones who will meet you near your place for a "friendly catch-up" or "language-exchange lesson" and then start inviting all those girls home with you, just as you would with any normal date.

Even if they won't meet you near your house, you still have an incredibly valuable resource - getting to know your target demographic inside out. It's like bullet four in this post by Chase on how to get women who are 'hot' (but it's really a post about humanizing and getting to know the girls in a target demographic you haven't broke into yet): viewtopic.php?f=3&t=5840

~Nick

 

[Mr. Wes]

Yo, thanks for the input Nick! I didn't really think of it like that.
Currently, I have a few barriers in my way...what would you do about these:
-I stay an hour and a half or so away from Tokyo. If I wasn't getting a hotel (haven't checked the prices yet) how should I keep a girls interest on that long way home? Maybe it'd be better to go to their home? How do you get invited?

-Are there any cultural sensitivities that I may not know about besides the usual -San, -kun, -chan at the end of people's names and other things. I feel like I could be accidentally causing offense to Japanese people. Although I know they'd really appreciate it if I spoke their language, they'd also appreciate if I understood little bits of there culture.
I bow when I need to, I believe I'm polite but I'm unsure if I come off as rude still. Or is that such a bad thing? Lol


Another thing I'm worried about (that only I can simply fix) is that me and my roommate have been attached at the hip for a while now. I'd talk to a lot more girls in public if we weren't always together. Problem is, I can't go out alone...I have to have a "buddy" just in case. My room mate is cool and all but he's not interested in seduction or getting laid like I am. Our common interests include the sightseeing, photography, and working out. That's it.
I also rely on him to figure out the way around the confusing train lines. He does all that and I kick back and don't do shit lol. I should probably learn more about the trains so I can spread out my radius of where I go.
(By myself, I only go as far as Yokohama and any towns before that)

That's all for now. New Year's is coming up and I heard that it gets WILD in Roppongi.
Wes

 

[ray_zorse]

I cannot really think of any cultural issues that would impact on picking up Japanese women. They have normal attitudes and ideas just like any American, Aussie, British, Kiwi, European girl... anyone in a first-world country basically. The material on this site tells u everything u need to know I reckon.

Things to be aware of :-
1) They are pretty shy. So breaking the ice can be more work. But also more rewarding.
2) They get anxious when they meet foreigners... like this "(thinks) oh shit he's a foreigner... he'll expect me to speak English... but I don't understand English grammar very well... what if I sound like a baby... oh shit shit... I know... I'll call my colleague/friend over, she can do it better than me... oh no I can't see them... shit shit what am I gonna do... err how do you say hello again... uhh got it! (says) Hello! Can I help you with something? (thinks) oh fuck did I fuck it up? that probably wasn't polite enough, am I meant to call him sir? will he be offended.. oh but he is young.. oh shit this is all too hard.. but I can't let him know I'm panicking (looks down stony faced)".
3) In JP it is rude to make eye contact with superiors, you look down when speaking to them and when entering a room. They'll treat you as a superior too because you're a guest.

Why don't u go sarging in Yokohama or even just in your local town. The logistics will be much better. And country/provincial girls can be a lot more charming. They may have more conservative parents, however. But JP are fundamentally progressive and not conservative ppl. U won't have issues (how could the ppl who invented J-porn be conservative...)

Lose your buddy. Go sarging alone. Having a wing might be better for night game. But honestly in Roppongi there is so much eager pussy there's no need. And JP girls are very open minded so they won't give a fuck about a single guy opening someone in their group (if they do then they're probably colleagues or acquaintances and lying to each other they're all virgins, so having a wing probably wouldn't really help).

Lastly on the subject of your opener, I defo believe you need to KISS and just go direct or situational. I couldn't see myself fannying about waiting for them to get my implied meaning and in any case this just feels a bit beta to me. Just tell them they are cute "Anata wa kawaii" or one of the longer variants I posted earlier. They'll eat it up. I promise you that.

cheers, Ray

 

[PrettyDecent]

Definitely one way going about it is sarging nearer your hometown instead, like Ray mentioned.

I stay an hour and a half or so away from Tokyo. If I wasn't getting a hotel (haven't checked the prices yet) how should I keep a girls interest on that long way home? Maybe it'd be better to go to their home? How do you get invited?

Ey, yeah, normally I'd recommend using a Love Hotel that you can rent for just a couple hours for couples to take a couple hour "afternoon nap" in. But if you're considering the friend/language partner route, that wouldn't really be congruent with the whole situation (though fuck it, sure you can make it work).

In this case, I'd recommend just getting a room inside Tokyo city that you can rent on a monthly basis (since you're planning on staying there a while anyway). I just found these rooms in Tokyo near a train station for around ¥62000/month - that translates to about $125 USD/week. If you split it with a friend, that's $62.5 USD/week. About the same price you'd pay for a hotel room for one night in the city, at least.

Are there any cultural sensitivities that I may not know about besides the usual -San, -kun, -chan at the end of people's names and other things. I feel like I could be accidentally causing offense to Japanese people.

I'd maybe learn a few, just out of basic courtesy of being in someone else's country...but I wouldn't try to learn much more than the average polite tourist. You're a foreigner, and they are excited about your outside customs (though, Tokyo itself is getting quite international).

~Nick

 

[Mr. Wes]

Hey thanks guys! The links that you posted earlier inspired what happened tonight.
I did a little something that I never did before.

So usually instead of spending my free time reading, I immediately started working to see if I can get laid TONIGHT. I made it a goal to push as far as I needed to go. There's this other girl who works here who I met through a mutual friend. She also a foreigner. She's an awkward shy white girl with short hair and not THAT attractive but I had good tension with her so I kept flirting with her throughout the past few weeks. There's so this other girl that hangs out with me and my roomate. She goes out with us occasionally but apparently my roomate has feelings for her. Although it seems like me and her have more sexual chemistry anyway while they have a "romantic" or "playful flirty" chemistry.

First off I walked to her room and she let me I. And we chilled and hung out a bit.
I'd know. Her all this time and made sexual innuendos at her but I never really GOT TO KNOW her.
So I sat on her bed as she sat at her desktop downloading music (pretty platonic I know. I used as a warm up) and I deep dived her about many topics. It sucked that every time I'd bring out my usual sexual innuendoes, she'd give me a funny look and then continue talking like: okay? That was weird...why'd you bring that up?
There was a good distance between us so there was nothing special going on but I can tell she was enjoying opening up to me. I wanted to practice verbally escalating like I can do over text or through skype.
Basically, I was going to start with innuendoes and then if she doesn't seem to mind, progress I to talking about her sexual preferences and interests, then describing those things with very visual wording....stop....ask if she's getting wet. Then proceed as necessary. Then repeat if needed or take two steps until I can make her visual me and her doing those things together.
That's usually how I do it on skype or text so I'm giving it a try in person.
I didn't make it far though. Girls are much more accepting of innuendoes over texts and behind screens. They send little faces back like:
Eventually I left then I texted the awkward girl for a little bit asking if she got off work yet and then TOLD her to dress in something nice and come to my room. She complied and found my room. I had my lights dimmed when she came in. She was wearing a coat like we were about to go somewhere but I switched the frame and made her sit down on my bed, relax and we talked. I deflected all her questions about where we were going or what we should do and then I just deep dove her. I dived I to her relationship history, her spiritual beliefs, her music taste. During the topics on relationships I kept trying to steer the conversation towards talking about sex so I could dive I to what she was into but she kept talking about sex like it was a bad word and it was never really clear if she's even had sex before. I made her feel comfortable and I judged and deflected anti slut defenses a couple times but she also kept telling me that she's not the "hookup" kind of girl and she believes things are "meant to be" and basically she's an idealist.
It became apparent that if I pushed for this I was probably going to have to deal with LMR and honestly that made me nervous because I don't want to deal with a possible accusation of rape.
Eventually we left my room to grab something to eat and she asked me about my past relationships while we ate. I went ahead and told her because telling the story of my first gf shows the importance of why couples need to have sex and the story may have caused the inception of an idea in her head that relationships just are not working out if a couple doesn't LOVE fucking each other. I realize here that she was investing by asking me questions. Then after eating we went to this young adults center on "campus" and played a game of pool. Let me tell you, there are SO many sexual innuendoes you can make while playing pool. Just get creative.
"I should've hit it harder...maybe it would've gone balls deep into that hole"
"You're really good with that stick"
And plenty of "that's what (s)he said" moments.
Eventually, instead of pushing as far as I could go, I decided to go back to my room without her.
She seemed a little disappointed and wanted to play another game/ continue the night but I told her some excuse like I have to get up early tomorrow (which I do).
I could've gone for a kiss in my room because "it's better to have gone for it and failed than to never have gone for it at all" oh well.
Really, I do t think I wanted to deal with some LMR and I'd rather deal with a more attractive experienced girl. I was just losing attraction. I want to lose my virginity to a girl I like a little. The fact that she was inexperienced and not ALL THAT and would possibly give me LMR didn't seem worth it.

But now, that's officially my 4th or 5th date or something. I think I see clearly the process of how a date goes and how casual it's supposed to be. I remember the first date I went on, I was so nervous and over thought everything and had no idea what I was doing. Now I just go in and do my process and talk to the girl like she's a normal human being.
Despite no result, I learned something and now I'll try to find a more attractive girl around.

Wes

(Also from the link that Nick gave me, I'm taking the advice Chase gave about becoming friend
with all types of girls to see everything you need to know about different types. I'm going to stop being picky about who I talk to and just talk to everyone.)

That's all for now.

 

[Mr. Wes]

Okay I'm back out in Yokohama right now with a couple friends. Not my room mate. Just my Filipino friends. Were out shopping and I've been approaching jp girls while with hem. But I'll to that in a second.

Something in my mindset is changing. I'm starting to develop a "type" of jp girl here while as before I was in culture shock and getting excited over just about every girl I saw. Now that I've talked to a few and gotten to know a few personalities and seen a wide range of styles it became clear that girls here are just like back home. Despite the fact that everyone looks the same, everyone seems to make themselves unique with their own styles. I'm seeing jp girls as people now and I'm starting to think about which type of jp girl is my type.
Some guys told me that I should approach the girls that dress in "street styles", urban inspired clothing and seem like a sneaker head because those are the jp girls that are into black guys. Too bad they are rare for me to see and they don't seem to show off their assets like the girls I keep approaching do.
I approach girls who have pretty faces, long hair, short skirts or shorts showing off their long legs and revealing their thick thighs. But I'm not having much luck with them and sometimes they're taken. Always by some J pop star looking guy who looks like the ideal version of "cool" here in japan. Anyways here's the approaches so far. I'm still out so I'll add more as I approach more:

First we were in this jewelry store and I approached this really pretty girl working in there. She had her hair in a ponytail and had one strand in the front that was curled. She wore a classy outfit with a form hugging skirt showing that she had a little bit of booty. (Which is pretty rare here...it makes me sad...I need some ass on these skeletons T_T) She had brown eye contacts in (usually the fake eyes bother me. It she was really cute)
I asked if she spoke English and she shyly said no. Then I told her to wait a minute and typed on my translator on my phone.
I typed: you are the prettiest woman I have seen all day. I love your fashion sense. (I used the word love and forgot that in their language I might sound like: I want to MARRY your fashion sense, I love it that much...so she might've been weirded out)
She didn't say than you or anything just shyly nodded then back away slowly. I reigned her back in and asked her name. Her name is Midori (which means green) and I pointed it out in English.
She smiled and nodded. Then I typed on my translator: are you shy? (I need to learn how to say this or: don't be shy around me)
She shyly nodded yes
Then I typed: please don't be shy . I'm not scary.
She smiled and nodded.
I told her my name. Then she said she'll be right back and went to help customers. I thought she was running away so I walked away and walked around for a bit. I gravitated back and she was free again.
She drifted over to me and then I opened her again. She pointed at my friends standing at the paying counter as if asking "are you with them?"
I nodded yes. Then she shyly took off again and my and my friends left.

I approached a girl in the Pokemon store and directly told her: Anata wa kirei desu
She said thank you and shyly ran away not even staying to talk or anything. Really frustrating.
What sucks is that I see a few white guys and black guys walking around holding hands with their jp girlfriends and I'm just like: how the fuck did you accomplish that?!
They always smirk at me and nod like: yea man, she's cute isn't she?
And I nod at them giving respect.

Every other girl so far has been flighty and follows the same routine of saying thank you to my direct compliment and then running away.
Also, here this mall...I'm practically ignored. No stares like I usually get. I think it's because this mall is full of foreigners and the local jp people are pretty much used to seeing us so they're not phased or interested.

Other than that, it's frustrating when everyone keeps saying: oh you're black, you have the best chance with the girls here. They love black guys. But I'm not exactly feeling the love or getting swarms of jp wanting to suck my dick.
It's just my expectations haven't been met yet and I'm feeling disappointed.

I think I'll have better luck going out alone now instead of with a group or my room mate. Turns out I'm allowed to go out alone but it has to be a place I've been before and that I'm familiar with. I've only been out twice alone so far and it was either in the same town or a train stop away.
I think that jp girls pay less attention to me when I'm with a group and it may be intimidating.

Some guys are telling me I'd have better luck at clubs or bars and that the girls wouldn't act so shy there. But i still can't find the clubs close to me and bars are hard to distinguish from every other place around here. I can't read the signs and bars are tucked away or have window shades pulled down. The only bars that are easy to find are themed bars.

Okay, we're leaving now and as I was getting on the train this cute jp girl who may have been a halfie (she had natural light brown eyes and Caucasian features) made prolonged eye contact with me and we both smiled but I assumed she about to get on the same train so I walked on and sat down to wait for her to come in. Looked back outside and she's standing on the platform looking at me and waiting for our train to take off. I guess she's taking the next one.
It freaking sucks how I've finally saw a sign of interest and didn't even get to act on it. Now I'm on the train ride home and I guess I'm done for the night.

Lastly, I got a new leather jacket which makes me look really cool but I don't have much clothes besides that and other black colored clothing so I might be a little intimidating. Girls might think I'm goth or something.
I would buy clothes here but they fit weird and are expensive. Everything here seems to be 10-20$ more than it would be in the states, although food is always a reasonable price. All we ever seem to do is eat or shop.

I need to get more gaijin friends out in town to light the path for me and I need some Japanese friends.
If anyone reading this has been to japan and has approached girl there, how did your typical interactions go?
I haven't been on any dates, insta dates, gotten any text backs, or actual numbers with no lame excuse. I don't understand it.

That's all for now. When I get home, I might type up how my tinder endeavors are going here.
(I only ever match with white girls and gaijins, I haven't matched with any of the Japanese girls on tinder yet. It really makes me believe that they're not into me. Maybe I jet don't know the type like people like me. I was also told to lookout for the Americanized or westernized looking girls who have a western fashion style)

That's all for now.
Wes

 

[ray_zorse]

Mate it sounds like things are going pretty well, cold approach is always gonna be a mixed bag, to some extent it's a numbers game... you described about 3 approaches in an outing, one of whom was a hired gun (thus unavailable for much other than a brief chat and a number, or long gaming I suppose). Were there others? It will be hard to get into double figures on an outing if u are with friends. (I just did 2 approaches while seeing my friends off at the airport but this was a lot).

Eg. this morning I did about 20~30 approaches in a single outing and most went pretty much like u described with the Pokemon girl, u just gotta persist and do more approaches, until u get one who is (a) free and (b) attracted and (c) unafraid to spend time with you. (I'd go for insta date or same day lay due to the obvious problems of texting and calling across cultural and language barriers). Even with this many approaches I didn't find one. IOI based game would improve hitrate and I defo renember getting IOIs from JP girls but I'm not at a level where I can/should incorporate that and maybe you aren't either. Just gotta treat it all as good practice.

As to American dudes with JP girlfriends well they probably just hang out in bars or clubs until they somehow stumble into r/ship by mistake after which they become needy and dependent (this smirking at you sounds like validation seeking) and she is high maintenance and calls the shots. If u get a chance to observe those couples interacting (other than walking down the street) do so. Observe who leans in to whom and who is working to keep conversation going etc. Might be some surprises for u.

When I see a dude with a girl on his arm I used to feel jealous. Now I feel sorry for him in proportion to how hot she is, cos of all the drama he'll have to endure and the chasing he'll have to do to stay in the hot seat. Obviously there are exceptions; he might have read this site. But as a general rule...

Hazukashii=be shy
Hazukashiku naranai de (kudasai)=(Please) don't become shy
Kowai=be scary
Kowakunai=not be scary
Ore wa kowakunai=(As for me,) I'm not scary

cheers, Ray

PS Uniqlo should have clothes that fit you. Okay some of their range is a bit pedestrian but there are also some gems. I think they may have free alteration service too. And you can hit on girls in the store which is an added bonus