Skippy's Daygame Journal

[Skippy]

Background​

I was at a nice big mall. I have no idea why but the approach anxiety was still strong today. Despite taking a cold shower too. Only did two approaches, got one number. Partly because it was hard to find lone sets, but not impossible. I think I counted at least 5 in total that were alone. I only did two approaches which is abysmal given the time I spent on this outing. I did get to try out fog's herd gambit and it was promising so far. I can't wait to try it some more.

Girl 1:
Did deep focus opener. She stopped and said thanks but then continued walking onwards I don't think she realized I was going to follow up with a rainbow ruse. I needed to be a little bit more persistent there. It's also hard to hear in the mall.

Girl 2:
Stopped her with the deep focus opener, she thought she looked more like Jennifer Lopez. I should keep her in mind too. Then I asked her if she could ever see herself in hollywood and she says she used to do some modeling, so I clarified that no I mean acting, and she goes into how acting is so much fun yada yada... It was a simple transition into an sot of "being able to be whoever you want to be". Then she asks me if I could live in a world from a movie, what would I choose. Which is great as a social frame gambit and giving a rich description of the world can also lend itself to some emotional stimulation.

At some point I ask her what she's up to and she says she's going home, and I tell her I was meeting a friend earlier because she has a bit of a dilemma but then I say "wait...you're not the judgmental type right?" And she's like no no you can tell me what happened. So I go into fog's Herd Gambit. And before I can even get to the two options, she's already invested into it and sharing her thoughts. She starts by asking me "oh how old is your friend?" and how when you're young you want to explore everything and not live a life of regrets etc...How she works with people in their 70s and 80s and at that decade is when you start looking back and having regrets. Then I follow it up by talking about travel.

After a bit we decided to wait for the bus outside, so she first goes to say goodbye to her friend (who works at one of the stalls in the mall) We walk outside and talk about random topics; she volunteers at a homeless shelter, astrology. And something about creativity. Where she was planning to live. Her bus is about to come so I number close her. In this case I just suggested we continue over a coffee and she's like yea...lemme give you my number. But she didn't give me her last name or last initial. So that was some negative compliance there.

I texted her "hey who's that guy you were talking to " which she "loved" and later when I got home, I text her telling her that my friend thought her advice was really solid and mature. But I might have texted that a bit too late at night. I should've done it within an hour.

Thoughts​

Overall this week I did 11 approaches and got 4 phone numbers. Approach volume should've been a little higher. Actually that's quite bad. But it's good that I went for numbers finally.

 

[Skippy]

Background(Thursday's Outing)​

AA was high and I only did one approach. Some approaches I passed up on

1. Older asian woman at the Target. No good excuse for why I didn't approach her. Just high AA.
2. big booty chinese woman. She had big jugs too and she stood next to me for a while at the pasta aisle. I couldn't think of a celeb lookalike though. Afterwards I thought I'd approach her as she was leaving the store but she went into a cvs and I felt like following her in there would be too much.
3. Some other asian girl I could've approached at the grocery store. We made eye contact as we passed each other in the aisle. Again I wasn't sure who she looked like.
4. Some Korean girl with dark red hair nearby

Oh and I ran into two girls that I approached before. I could tell they noticed me but I just pretended to not notice them.

Girl 1:
Anyway before all that nonsense with the grocery store I noticed this brunette with a nice ass wearing yoga pants. As I got closer I realized...she had legitimately green eyes. Shit what's the playbook for that? Anyway I just bullshitted some actress

Me: Oh hey...Do you know who you sort of resemble?
Her: uh?
Me: Do you know who you resemble? Her: (still confused but receptive and stopped)
Me: Has anyone ever told you?
Her: I dont know
Me: uh...okay
Her: what is she
Me: wait which way are you heading?
Me: Okay I'll tell you but you have to promise not to get mad...if you don't like her
Me: Do you pinky promise? (we pinky promise)
Her: Okay

She looks up the actress on her phone which gives me a good excuse to stand near her

Her: a lot of people tell me I look like (this actress she shows me she looks like, and apparently a lot of people tell her she looks like that actress on her instagram)

Me: Have you ever considered going into hollywood or thought about it?
Her: No cause I don't think I'm good at it
Me: I used to when I was little
Her: That's cool, My brother does. He did some
Me: Oh okay, so what do you do?
Her: I do some work as a modelllll I work in eyebrow modeling
Me: Is it cover modeling?
Her: it's for picture

Me: So if you could be famous for one thing, what would you pick?
Her: I would pick modeling. Maybe if I could pick acting I'd try that
Me: The thing with acting is it's really freeing. You get to be whoever you want to be.
Her: Yea
Me: That's the one thing I've noticed about it. It's like you have complete freedom, you can let your imagination run wild and.
Me: I think with modeling you have to do something like give off a certain expression or vibe or energy?
Her: Yeah
Me: It's similar because you have to be expressive.

Me: I think for me I would be creating something like a product (We start walking at this point because I didn't know where to take the convo. She asks my name, and I try to figure out what her logistics are but she's going home because her boyfriend is getting home soon. bugger)

 

[Skippy]

Quick update on last weeks outings:

Friday 10/15/2021:
I went to a college campus, opened 4 girls, hooked 2, and gave one my number but she never texted me back.
Saturday 10/16/2021:
Instant-dated this Czech Au Pair
Sunday 10/17/2021:
Only did one approach, but the girl mentioned a bf.

 

[Skippy]

Background​

I did not do any approaches for about 2-3 weeks. This past week was because I was preparing for a presentation on monday and on top of that, had a job interview so I was just cramming for everything. And before that... I had a couple days where I went out but just didn't do any approaches. It was bad. I think my 3/4 split is not working too well. It worked well the first week but after that, my approach volume tapered off. I think what I also notice is I'll have one week where I do my target number of approaches, but then the next week it'll be slightly less than the target and then it'll completely taper off. I don't know why that always happens but my guess is that when I do more approaches, I get more rejections which turns into a negative feedback loop.

• I'll resume TRE sessions on days when I'm not approaching
• I will switch my schedule to daygame on Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, Sunday, and then nightgame on Friday and Saturday. So still going out 4 days a week plus an extra Friday nightgame session, but now it's spread throughout the whole week instead of just one clump.
• Add in daily meditation somehow, since I saw a video of how that reduces approach anxiety amongst other things.
• Visualize getting both good and bad reactions to my approaches and being unaffected by them.

Girl 1: This girl was almost exactly my type. She had a juicy ass and she was wearing yoga pants. She hooked pretty well but I was rusty. I should've taken her phone number but I was weary of taking a number from an interaction that just might not go anywhere. My verbals were crap, and she was headed off to class. The only positive is that she would be asking me lots of questions. Also there was no "man to woman" dynamic. I completely forgot to do anything in terms of building sexual tension. I blame it on being rusty.


Me: Oh hey! Do you know who you sort of resemble?
Her: who?
Me: Okay, I'll tell you but you have to pinky swear not to get mad if you don't like her
Her: Oh I won't be mad!
Me: Do you know....
Her: I don't
Me: [describes who she is]
Her: ooh! I'll look her up. Thank you?
Me: There's a slight difference in your vibe though
Her: okay okay
Me: Like you strike me as someone who's very bubbly.
Her: I get that a lot, yeah
Me: I bet you make friends really quickly, but you have very few close friends.
Her: I just have a few close friends. Quality over quantity!
Me: Could you ever see yourself in hollywood or acting?
Her: No I couldn't deal with all that attention.
Me: Sounds lilke it's very different from what you're majoring in
Her: Yea probably I feel like I like to do my own thing but, I do like meeting new people.
Me: oh okay
Her; Are you a student here?

From here she starts investing into the convo asking me what year I am, where I'm from, what I major in, what's my name. etc... But really those were the convo topics. No emotional stimming, or reality pace. Oh and we started walking after she started investing in the convo. I forgot to sexually subcommunicate, didn't get a chance to qualify her or anything. Once she asked me if I thought she gave off the [area]-vibe and I looked her over

Another problem is approaching a girl that's walking INTO campus means she's rushing to get to class. You'll want to instead approach the girls that are walking OUT of campus.

Thoughts​

So I'm a bit rusty, admittedly but I missed two key details in this convo. One is when she said "quality over quantity" I could've gone into how yeah when you're a senior you realize your time is valuable so when you meet that one person you click with that's worth so much more than having a bunch of shallow connections.

Other part in the conversation that I missed out on was when she said she likes meeting people. I could've gone into the SOT of meeting new people. "Isn't it interesting how just the act of meeting new people can teach you so much about yourself? blah blah blah"

She said she's a business major. I could've asked her how she decided on that and then I could've said "oh you know I really appreciate that because when you told me you were a business major, I was thinking to myself 'this girl is really charming, but I wonder if she's down to earth'

Now for adding more sexual tension into this...

• Well I started off by having her pinky swear (which is some good initial compliance, gets an excuse for proximity, some mild initial touch)
• I could have gotten more proximity by having her look at the girl's picture on my phone
• I should've spoken slower.
• And I forgot to pay attention to my eye contact. So I don't remember how that was

And finally, in terms of getting the approaches in, I've noticed I've had good opportunities at this off entrance to the side of the main entrance to and from campus. I could try hanging out by the major crosswalks OUT of campus and approach girls on their way out.

 

[Skippy]

Background(Friday,Saturday night-time venue scouting)​

Friday, went to a bar-club with lots of attractive girls. Loud music and stuff, but no proper dance floor, just a narrow strip if anything so people are dancing anywhere. And it was packed. Lots of mixed groups looking to get lit. The problem is I waited in line for over an hour just to get in so I should remember to get there before 10:30. There was a pair of girls waiting by the bar that I wished I had approached and one of them had a freakin amazing ass. But I wasn't sure how to approach. In hindsight, I should've just come up next to them on the bar(it was all standing anyway) and I should've opened with something lame like "hey what are you guys drinking".

Saturday: I went to a club which was basically a bar and an outdoor area where the dj was playing music. The atmosphere was loud, of course, and the dance area was crowded and doubled as a smoking area (so no actual quiet area to talk). I arrived a little bit after 10:30 but still ended up waiting in line for about 30 min. Not bad actually. I struck up some convo with the dude in line behind me by making a comment "is this place as good as the wait makes it seem?" Turns out we're from the same state. We chatted maybe 5-10 min and then neither of us picked up the convo. Inside there were some very hot girls, but I had no idea how I could've talked to them. They were either busy dancing or with friends at a table. One girl, who was cute, looked over at me twice, but she was at a table in the dance area stuck in a sea of people and I wasn't sure how to approach. One asian girl with an amazing ass and a sexy back tattoo was standing at the edge of her group's table. At one point, her body was turned away from the group and we kinda looked at each other as I walked past into the dance area. I should've made a comment or something as I walked by but I'm not sure what I could've said. I could've probably just said "this dj is really good" better than nothing at least. Another fat Mexican girl turned to look at me as I walked by. I think that's all the ioi's I remember from saturday.

Then there was one girl sitting by the bar with a drink and I could've just asked her what the bartender was making (he was stirring a pot of something)

Overall, I hit my goal of just going out and starting a convo with someone. Although doing it at the line to the club is kind of cheating. But I'm actually starting to enjoy the idea of going out at night now. So this is progress.

The next goals are: force yourself to stay out until closing time, and read Teevster's articles on warming up and opening.

Oh, and I need to get more comfortable with talking and listening while wearing earplugs. (They're designed to tune out the loud background noises but not tune out speech, so for any zoom calls I have this week, I'll wear my earplugs)

 

[Skippy]

Background(Sunday)​

Had a really fruitful discussion with @Devilicious on the concept of the 'premortem'. Imagine a couple of years down the line, you failed at achieving your goal. What would you say went wrong? Okay now that you have a list of possible fail points, go plug them in.

Research conducted in 1989 by Deborah J. Mitchell, of the Wharton School; Jay Russo, of Cornell; and Nancy Pennington, of the University of Colorado, found that prospective hindsight—imagining that an event has already occurred—increases the ability to correctly identify reasons for future outcomes by 30%. We have used prospective hindsight to devise a method called a premortem, which helps project teams identify risks at the outset.

I did two approaches today, but I finally found a place on Sunday that's good for cold approach. Most of my favorite spots are usually dead that day or closed due to construction but this one had at least 4 babes I could've approached. Only did two though. I also forgot about daylight savings and how it gets dark an hour earlier, so that cut into my outing a bit.

My Outfit:
Blue blazer, white v-neck, gray skinny jeans, white sneakers, rings, and bracelet. blue floral facemask.

Girl 1: Chinese girl with yoga pants and a top-hat

I opened her with the dfo, she was skeptical on the approach, didn't know the actress or the tv show and was like "but you don't really know what I look like" (meaning she's wearing a mask. that's the first time someone said that to the dfo). She was ready to leave at any moment even when I just said "hey" anyway and she walked off into a zara shortly.

Girl 2: Busty Redhead
She hooked very strongly but when I tried to get her to pinky promise, she was like "no touching b.c of the whole pandemic remember" she wasn't saying it in a rude way, but also she wasn't wearing a mask...so I dunno what was up. She was asking me whether I watched that tv show as a kid, convo shifts to age. She's actually 35, and I did a little bit of reality pacing on the environment. So we talk about the cities we've lived in. At this point I remember. "okay she's not gonna like it if I touch her, but I can still sexually sub communicate in other ways" So I shifted to speaking slower and looking at her more seductively. (about 7 min in). As soon as I started doing that she mentions out of the blue that she has a husband. "she goes yeah just wanted to get that out of the way sooner rather than later" Looks like my sexual subcomms were working. But she keeps talking to me. Ask her how they met, and it turns out he also cold approached her at a cafe. So we talk about dating norms and how meeting like this is soo much better than the apps.

I share a story about my friend (actual story this time, not bullshit) how she moved to sf to meet guys because her type is the "down-to-earth tech type" but she was complaining about the apps and she wished she could get introduced through friends instead because then the guy is "vetted".

So I asked her if she had any advice on the matter. She thinks I'm asking for advice for myself so she tells me that my approach was "good, really good, like you didn't come across as creepy or anything, yeah just talk to a girl if she seems friendly and if she turns out to be a bitch then I guess don't bother" but I clarify that oh I meant advice for my friend. But she's stumped and not sure what kind of advice she'd give to a girl and how she'd start dating again if she divorced her husband and started dating again. We talk a bit more about stuff, walking and stopping periodically. Anyway, I wasn't going to push it since she was happily married from the sound of it. But she was fun to talk to.

Thoughts​

I also need to get used to "sudden approach opportunities" like when a girl materializes out of nowhere and is walking towards me. I should visualize those happening, and rehearse in my head how I'd react.

 

[Skippy]

Background(Friday nightgame)​

I hit my overall goal which was to stay out until closing time. The bar I went to actually had two dance floors, although one was mainly for hanging out more so then dancing. The music is loud enough that talking is hard but not impossible.

First interaction started off with this blackout drunk dude trying to talk to me. Don't know what he was trying to say. He looked like he'd fall over any time. The bouncer was following him and so was another girl. Eventually, the bouncer manages to get rid of him. So I ask the girl what's up with him? and she asks if he's my friend. I say no I don't know him. She tells me to stay away from him because there's bad energy coming from him. Then 3 of her other hot friends show up and they tell me that the dude whipped his dick out and tried to grab one of them by the ass and push her onto his dick. So I'm suddenly holding court with 4 hot girls, but the topic was such a buzzkill I didn't know what to do. What I could've done, maybe is say "aww Man that's such a bummer. You guy's probably went out hoping to have a good time, maybe meet some interesting people and then this happens...just puts a huge damper on everything. At least the night is still young though..." —something like that.. The girls converse amongst themselves and then go off to do something else. They didn't actually leave the bar until later. I could've re-approached them.

Next I think I said hi to some dudes or asked one guy where the bathrooms are.

This hot brunette walks in with her friends and starts dancing near where I'm chilling, she glanced over at me a couple times but I didn't know how to open her while she was dancing. Later on when I was dancing by the dj, she glanced over at me from the other dance floor, but then later into the night when she was dancing near me she didn't really give any ai's.

Noticed this 80yo geezer dancing with this hot blonde. They were really getting jiggy. and prancing around the venue. (This guy would later go on to dance with 5-6 other hot girls and he ended up number closing the hot brunette from earlier)

Then I saw this Ethiopian-looking chick standing by herself in the corner. So I asked her how she would describe this place. She says some stuff. I make a comment on that and then drift off. Later on, some dude actually approached her after I left and they started making out.

Then the hot blonde from earlier steps on my shoes while dancing so I move away but she comes after me asking if she stepped on me and she gets real close where I can smell her breath. And while dancing tells me how she got hit in the head with a door and she's still dizzy from that. I ask her if she seeing stars still. Noticed another girl glance at me after that encounter. The blonde was all over the place though. I think she had like 2-3 guys she was being very flirty with.

Then the token fat chick of the bar grabs me into the center of the dance strip a couple of times and starts doing some crazy moves. So I humor her for a bit.

Thoughts​

I mainly hit my goal which was to stay there until closing time. For now I think that's a good goal as I get more comfortable with this scene. And it's a slight improvement from the last time I went to that bar.

What I did well:​

1. Staying the whole time
2. Dancing to help me loosen up

What I could've done better:​

1. Given more good vibes to people, if even just in passing.
2. In the future, I'll make it my challenge to always approach at least one girl that you think is giving you ioi's. But not yet. Right now it's just to get out of the house and stay out.

 

[Fluxcapacitor]

@Skippy dude! The opening on a dancefloor (the hot brunette giving you proximity) is typically best to go for a "physical" opener rather than verbal if the music's really loud or she's dancing energetically. If she's too energetic and you're not in that state it's bad timing, you'll have wait a little or pump your state. It's usually best to approach with similar states/energy to avoid a world change.

Opening can be as simple as dancing up to her/near her, make and hold eye contact as a pre approach and then go in. You can go more physical and bump into her either inadvertent touch or deliberate, either way you break the touch barrier and you can transition. You can be bolder if you're feeling it and hold your hand out for her as an invitation to dance or even take her hand (this has to be calibrated or it'll be disastrous).

If you prefer verbal you can wait for the song to end and use a standard opener, comment on a tattoo/jewellery/clothes, comment on the music, ask how her nights going - there's millions of options. - alternatively there's a half verbal approach where you sing along to the song. If you both like the song and you're both singing along you can create a little bubble together where it feels like your own little world and it feels natural to start talking after. (This is similar to the dancing and holding the eye contact approach, you create your own bubble).

 

[Skippy]

@Fluxcapacitor Thanks for the opening suggestion!

If she's too energetic and you're not in that state it's bad timing, you'll have wait a little or pump your state.

oh that's a good point, I was definitely feeling that mismatch at times

 

[Skills]

Background(Friday nightgame)​

I hit my overall goal which was to stay out until closing time. The bar I went to actually had two dance floors, although one was mainly for hanging out more so then dancing. The music is loud enough that talking is hard but not impossible.

First interaction started off with this blackout drunk dude trying to talk to me. Don't know what he was trying to say. He looked like he'd fall over any time. The bouncer was following him and so was another girl. Eventually, the bouncer manages to get rid of him. So I ask the girl what's up with him? and she asks if he's my friend. I say no I don't know him. She tells me to stay away from him because there's bad energy coming from him. Then 3 of her other hot friends show up and they tell me that the dude whipped his dick out and tried to grab one of them by the ass and push her onto his dick. So I'm suddenly holding court with 4 hot girls, but the topic was such a buzzkill I didn't know what to do. What I could've done, maybe is say "aww Man that's such a bummer. You guy's probably went out hoping to have a good time, maybe meet some interesting people and then this happens...just puts a huge damper on everything. At least the night is still young though..." —something like that.. The girls converse amongst themselves and then go off to do something else. They didn't actually leave the bar until later. I could've re-approached them.

Next I think I said hi to some dudes or asked one guy where the bathrooms are.

This hot brunette walks in with her friends and starts dancing near where I'm chilling, she glanced over at me a couple times but I didn't know how to open her while she was dancing. Later on when I was dancing by the dj, she glanced over at me from the other dance floor, but then later into the night when she was dancing near me she didn't really give any ai's.

Noticed this 80yo geezer dancing with this hot blonde. They were really getting jiggy. and prancing around the venue. (This guy would later go on to dance with 5-6 other hot girls and he ended up number closing the hot brunette from earlier)

Then I saw this Ethiopian-looking chick standing by herself in the corner. So I asked her how she would describe this place. She says some stuff. I make a comment on that and then drift off. Later on, some dude actually approached her after I left and they started making out.

Then the hot blonde from earlier steps on my shoes while dancing so I move away but she comes after me asking if she stepped on me and she gets real close where I can smell her breath. And while dancing tells me how she got hit in the head with a door and she's still dizzy from that. I ask her if she seeing stars still. Noticed another girl glance at me after that encounter. The blonde was all over the place though. I think she had like 2-3 guys she was being very flirty with.

Then the token fat chick of the bar grabs me into the center of the dance strip a couple of times and starts doing some crazy moves. So I humor her for a bit.

Thoughts​

I mainly hit my goal which was to stay there until closing time. For now I think that's a good goal as I get more comfortable with this scene. And it's a slight improvement from the last time I went to that bar.

What I did well:​

1. Staying the whole time
2. Dancing to help me loosen up

What I could've done better:​

1. Given more good vibes to people, if even just in passing.
2. In the future, I'll make it my challenge to always approach at least one girl that you think is giving you ioi's. But not yet. Right now it's just to get out of the house and stay out.

skippy i can't believe this, you miss sooooooo many easy opportunities.... "the pulling out dick" was a time to do all your stuff you have been learning..... subject of how guys are soo creepy and don't get women, they don't get women and understand women it just make it more harder to guys like me, is the same as guys sending dick pics too women i don't get it, and then going into so many second gen stuff... i mean even i think some of the guys have a gambit of a creepy guy at the bar blah blah, i think lobo or lofty talk about "creepy guy gambit" but you don't even need that, so many ways you could have taken that stuff....

- girls dancing with you open dancing...

- girls touching stepping into you and the likes, must tiimes are iois, again the "fighting stance opener" stuff could work and things like that (look at the post i made on that)

- you got open by that girl and you did not capitalize on it...

what you could have done better is actually game dude, you are toooooo passsive...

 

[Skippy]

skippy i can't believe this, you miss sooooooo many easy opportunities.... "the pulling out dick" was a time to do all your stuff you have been learning..... subject of how guys are soo creepy and don't get women, they don't get women and understand women it just make it more harder to guys like me, is the same as guys sending dick pics too women i don't get it, and then going into so many second gen stuff... i mean even i think some of the guys have a gambit of a creepy guy at the bar blah blah, i think lobo or lofty talk about "creepy guy gambit" but you don't even need that, so many ways you could have taken that stuff....

Agreed, I missed a golden opportunity to do all sorts of framing, and sot's.

what you could have done better is actually game dude, you are toooooo passsive...

Yeah you're right, everytime I've been going out at night, I've been way too passive. My main goal was just to get myself to stay in the bar the whole night and not bitch out after 30 min. But I'm starting to get more comfortable with them so I will push myself to start capitalizing on all these ioi's and implementing your tips. Thanks!

 

[Skippy]

An update is in order. So I realized this month that finishing the dissertation, preparing for job interviews, and heavily going out to cold approach is just too much. Just any one of these by themselves is a gargantuan task. And it'd be soo much easier if I killed off one of these. If I only had two of these to focus on, that'd be glorious, and it would free up my focus so much.

At the same time, all of these are important aspects of my life so it's not like I could drop any one of them just like that.

Naturally, cold approach is sitting in 3rd place in my list of priorities simply because it's not as urgent as the first two.

My solution to this trilemma was to figure out what I would consider the "bare minimum" amount of cold approaching I would do. I decided on the following barebones structure:

• Go out and approach for an hour in your neighborhood
• Go out friday and saturday nights from 10-1 (bars close at 2) and just go to the venues in your area
• Don't write a field report for every outing, but once a week is a good frequency

So far I've been doing this for about 1.5 weeks and my approach has been half-assed, unfortunately. I will go out for an hour hoping that no hot girls show up so that I can excuse myself from approaching, and when I do approach, lately it's been just trying to get the opener in and ejecting. Of course, there's always been attractive girls out there that I could've approached but I end up not doing the approach and hesitating too much and missing the opportunity. This is unacceptable behavior and I cannot keep doing this to myself.

Today for example I went to a Target and noticed this hot Korean nurse wearing scrubs and she glanced at me a couple times and we were both walking around shopping for a good 20-30 min and I never fucking approached her. And another hot girl checked me out while I was at the checkout counter (that one wouldve been a harder approach admittedly) but I need to be better

I'll keep trying for another two weeks. It's lame that I'm stuck on this AA phase but I'll review my list of solutions above and go through it. Then I'll be home for about 3 weeks so in that time I'll just grind hard and finish my dissertation, make it ready to present so that I can start off the new semester with only 2 major things to focus on.

 

[Skippy]

So this month I want to grind hard and mostly finish the dissertation, as I said last time. But I'm still going out everyday for an hour and approaching girls in my nbhd. I usually aim for doing one approach, and that takes about 30 min to knock out. The usual problems with doing only one approach a day remain, of course (such as not being warmed up and ruminating all day over that one approach). But after monday I was pretty good about knocking that approach out, and did an approach each day except for today. But today it was pretty dead, and there were no great options.

This week I've only done like 5 approaches anyway. Productivity-wise it's been really good. I finished a big project, and added some sections to my dissertation that I've been procrastinating on for a while.

In my 1-hour daygame outings, if I could just consistently get 2 approaches in, that would be amazing. I learned that I need to really seize every opportunity though to be able to do that. Getting in 14 approaches on a week where you're ultra-focused on something else would be tremendously useful.

Oh and I also tried adding premise once because a girl I approached was carrying flowers so in conversation I asked if those flowers were for her bf. I will drop the bf line more often.

So I have a few main things I'm focusing on:

1. Doing 2 approaches an outing, (follow 3to5-second rule and minimize hesitation)
2. Stop the girls so that you can micro-escalate easier and hold the tension.
3. Microescalation

Summed up neatly that would be stop two girls a day and practice your micro-escalation.

Don't worry so much about verbals for the time-being. Having some canned go-to questions for the verbals is good so that I don't have to put too much processing power thinking about what to say and I can focus on the microescalation.

• I already have the mini-adventure rpo stack that I am comfortable with
• If I'm doing the deep focus opener it'd be DFO—>"this is crazy!"—> nah I shouldn't tell you, maybe you hate her—>" okay fine you have to pinky promise not to get mad if you don't like her though[she pinky promises]"—>Rainbow ruse—>"could you ever see yourself going into hollywood" or "if you could live in a movie universe what would it be" —> Golden question , Herd gambit, blah blah blah

And remember mirroring and labeling ...it works great in conjunction with seductive listening that 60yoc talks about because you're just getting her to spill her beans and you're just listening to her.

And then later on, starting in 2022, the plan will be to spend the year slowly working through Riker and the hypnosis material.

 

[Skippy]

Summary of the Week​

I was out this past month spending holidays with the family. I had a relaxing break and now I’m ready to resume approaching. I was very gung ho about finishing off the dissertation by the time I got back. I was reasonably productive and did make some progress, but after all, there’s only so much you can finish while spending time with family vs locked up in an apt by yourself. In reality, there’s a lot more work that I need to do and after revisiting my past 12-week-years, I realized I made the mistake of focusing on too many things.

Last 12-week year, for example, I was pushing myself to go out regularly, apply to jobs regularly and finish the dissertation. Once the job hunt started to get busy, everything else was destabilized. I also made the mistake of waiting until the interviews to start prepping, which led to cramming heavily the week before. Instead, I should’ve done a little bit of prep each day. Before the interviews even started rolling in. What ended up happening is I didn’t hit any of the goals but got maybe 1/3 of the way for each one individually.

This 12-week year, the focus will be on academics. The remaining two areas of my life (job hunt and pickup) will be put on maintenance mode.

Job hunt: I’ll spend only one hour a day on this. Apply to one job a day and spend 30 min preparing(now it’s just reviewing) for interviews. No more than this.

Pickup: Go out 3 times a week for daygame. Do at least 2 approaches an outing. Go out once a week for nightgame, at the clubs nearby that don’t have a long wait.

I just got back late this week so I went out to scout venues this weekend and got my feet wet. Nothing notable to mention in terms of approaches. Only really did one so far. I did notice this busty chick with long, straight, pink hair stealing multiple glances at me. She was with two other friends so I had no clue how to open.

Lessons​

• speak up

Action Steps​

Work on microescalation as mentioned in the previous post. In particular, getting close to the girls will be my focus this week.

 

[Skippy]

Summary of the Week​

This week was a little better than last week, but I don’t have the excuse of having a half week like I did last time. I only did 3 approaches downtown, which is not enough to gain any traction. Tuesday I was supposed to go out, but it got derailed due to a weird sleep schedule. Sunday I was also supposed to go out, but I got dinner with friends for MLK weekend. The only day I really had a chance to daygame was thus Thursday, where I did actually do 3 approaches, so not bad, but given that I’m only doing daygame 3 days a week, it’s pretty measly in the grand scheme of things. I did actually go out and spent the whole night at one of the dance bars nearby so that was a slight improvement over last time.

Night Game​

The quality this Saturday night was absurdly good. I did better than last week in the sense that I actually stayed out the whole night and socialized with people a little bit, but very little to say in terms of approaching girls.

First I was by the bar and noticed some girl that I could’ve approached easily but didn’t. So I started trying to build some social momentum by introducing myself to some dude standing all by himself just staring at the people dancing. He was like “why do you want to know my name”. He warmed up afterward but I ditched.

It helped when I was on the dance floor at least and some dude approached me to pump my vibe and so I became less inhibited. He introduced me to these two hot blondes that were in his group and his other friend. I kind of lost track of them afterward when I went to get some water. This other guy who was standing around then started talking to me. He’s this DJ in his 40s. We exchanged contact info, he could be an ok wing even though he seems like a civilian. As I was talking to him, I also got approached by this weird chick who started flapping the wall portrait next to me, asking me how I felt about the picture. She was probably drunk out of her mind though. She was not attractive either.

Lessons​

• At a dance-bar if I’m solo, either walk somewhere, pretend to be waiting to order a drink, or go dance by yourself at the dance floor in between sets. Just standing around staring at people dancing is no bueno.
• Some of these girls were “hard to access”. Even though they were on the dance floor, they were just crowded by friends and people. So keep an eye out for the parts of the bar where it’s easy to approach girls and don’t hesitate when you see them walk by there.
• Main thing for nightgame: No hesitation!
• My mind is racing when I’m coming home from a night out, and I’m not in the mood to sleep. I think it’s because I think of all the excitement and stimulation from the night. This consistently happens and I need to think of a solution for dealing with it.

Action Steps for Next Week​

Get your shit sorted out sleep schedule-wise and don’t miss a planned outing this week.

 

[Skippy]

Summary of the Week​

I almost considered not posting this week’s review because it was so lame, but I need to face the music, and document my journey in full honesty. Dissertation-wise it’s going okay. I procrastinated a lot Tuesday-Friday and then it was a mad scramble on Saturday to finish everything my advisor wanted. But he was satisfied with my work. The sleep schedule has gotten even worse, so that’s unfortunate. And I also only did 1 daygame approach.

Lessons​

• If you do happen to be walking with a girl, you can still touch her shoulder at times to emphasize a point.
• IDEA: If you can’t stop her right there, set up an open loop, in the form of an unfinished story, and THEN once you do set the open-loop, stop by the cross-walk as if you’re going in a different direction and continue talking.

Notable Approaches​

Approached this Romanian girl who used to live in Spain. That day I had already binge-fapped and so I was feeling very low desire and also only operating on 3 hours of sleep so I was in a weird state. I went out to show myself that bad state is not an excuse. Luckily she walked by and she had an amazing ass which I knew logically that I had to pursue. She seemed receptive, but I was being a dunce and didn’t microescalate. Even my eye contact was really bad. She still stopped for a second to chat longer where she had to turn. While we were walking I was trying to get some better proximity but now I realize I could’ve touched her shoulder or something to make little comments. when I approached her, the topic of where she’s from came up, and I used that to ask her what she thinks about the guys in Europe vs the guys in America, but she mainly talked about dating culture instead, which is nbd. I used the herd gambit. But I also made sure to listen more to what she was saying and comment on that while smoothly transitioning into it (I didn’t do an audio recording so I kind of forgot what was said, but I know I was feeling very comfortable with the verbals because she was being receptive)


Anyway I tell her I’m enjoying talking with her and she says she is too so I suggested we continue over a coffee sometime. She thought I meant this moment. I was dead tired and not in the mood to do that so I just said I mean it could be some other day instead. She hesitates a bit but eventually offers to exchange numbers. I enter my number into her phone and text myself “Hey it’s [Name] <3” . Texting was going decently well imo. I pushed myself to flirt a little but I think her english is not so good. Her responses are slowing down and ATM it’s looking flakey, unfortunately. This is entirely to be expected given how I didn’t micro-escalate much. Just doing the same-old shit. Ah well it was only the first approach of the week though. I just haven’t put in enough volume to really practice anything.

Night Game​

Another embarrassingly passive night. I wasn’t in a good mood going out because of the texting problem. and I didn’t really have a warm-up plan. For some reason, I was really taken aback by how packed the dance-bar was when I got in. This is actually a good thing cause then I have an excuse to touch people and get them to move aside and even just be like “excuse me, guys” as I’m going through.

I actually did get approached by this blonde. As soon as I got on the dance floor she started dancing with me and her friend was there too. Then she got up close to me, grabbed me, and then she put my hands around her. It was all very clumsy and I was also feeling stiff. And then the girls disappeared to their table shortly after.


Another girl(also blonde, coincidentally) commented that she liked my jacket but she was already with a dude who seemed like her bf.

I missed a good opportunity to approach a girl who was kind of dangling (yes dangling) near me because her friend that she was originally dancing with went off to talk to the rest of the group about something. I should’ve just given her a fist bump. I wasn’t too attracted to her so no biggie.

And going out only once a week is not good because I’m still in the “shake off the rust” mode. But I will only do more nights once I’m done with the dissertation.

EDIT: To the blonde chick, I should've just gone up to her couch/table later on and said "You can't just grab me like that and not introduce yourself!"

:facepalm:

Action Steps for Next Week​

• Okay so it’s pretty clear I need to baby-step things even more. I wanted to open girls with a “hows your night” routine but clearly that’s still beyond me. So my goal for next week will be something simpler like “give two people who are dancing a fist bump”.
• 2am you start your night-time routine, regardless of how ‘unfinished’ everything is, and by 4am you are in bed, no exceptions.
• You’re no longer allowed to take a girls phone number or move her for an instant date until you can point to two different things you did specifically to escalate the vibe.

 

[Skippy]

Soooooo...an update is in order as it’s been over two months. What happened is I decided to shut myself in the apartment, and just grind out everything I needed for the dissertation. It was the home stretch and if I could just get this off my plate I could then put more attention to the job hunt and pickup. Last week, I had my thesis defense, so I’m finally finally done! I was working towards this moment for nearly two decades, and it’s just surreal that it's over.


Being back in the field is like seeing everything with color for the first time. The weather started to get warmer, girls were out in booty shorts with tans and it was a delicious sight to behold.


The job hunt is actually going decently. I’ve refined my resume multiple times, and I actually did get an offer but I turned it down because I still have a lot of time and I think I can find something better. During the process, I’ve had the chance to refine so many aspects of my interviewing and technical skills, that I’m resuming the job search with a lot more experience and clarity.

One of the biggest things I was working on this past quarter was on cutting down the number of goals I focus on. I have a tendency to want to do everything and it just results in a watered-down effort. I kept that in mind while planning things for the next quarter and I will focus on only two main goals this upcoming quarter.

I did go out a couple times now that I’m back, to shake off the rust and to tame the approach anxiety.

In terms of posting, I’ll need to think of how often I want to post and analyze things. I think there's undoubtedly a benefit to posting and reflecting on my interactions, but I need to also reduce the amount of content I consume.

One idea I wanted to test out was to focus on getting a certain number of rejections each day rather than a certain number of approaches. This will force me to escalate and close harder.

 

[Skippy]

Thursday 3/31/2022 Background​

It’s been two years since I last went to the gym, so I’m restarting my workout routine and I feel amazing. Before covid, I was in peak shape, so I anticipate about 4-6 weeks in order to catch up to my previous numbers. In addition, I'm adding neck exercises and I will buy some mastic gum to see if it does anything, although I’m a little hesitant to change anything on my face.

I’ve also been super on point with my grooming routine, trimming my facial hair every day instead of every few days, and I always look super fresh now. Also this is because I am going out without a facemask now.

Daygame: Outfit: Black skinny jeans, black v-neck, gray button-less cardigan, rings, bracelet. white sneakers.

I’ve been doing Gun’s spam approach exercises these past two days. I did 4 approaches today with the weak emergency plan A opener(Just open direct “hey I thought you were attractive” and immediately ask for the number “can I get your number so I can ask you out sometime”...literally the lamest interaction you could possibly have while still showing intent )

In spite of that, the reactions have been pretty good.

The main point of this exercise is actually to drill holding eye contact until she breaks it first. Not to ‘game’ her per se. Sometimes when she’s walking and she doesn’t stop, it’s hard to “hold eye contact” in the sense that she’ll look away because she’s continuing to walk.

First girl today stopped and was happy but she was already engaged. The second girl was this hot Honduran chick with a jiggly butt. She gave me her number but she spoke almost no english, I couldn’t understand what she was saying 90 percent of the time.

The third girl was a blow-out and the 4th girl was actually on the phone with her friend but she ignored her friend to keep talking to me. She tried to swap social media but eventually took my number. I wasn’t that attracted to the 1st and 4th girls though. I’m not expecting much from these numbers given the circumstances, but I’ll follow up with them just for the hell of it.

It does go to show that so many times I’ve passed up on number closing abrupt-ending interactions when I could’ve just told the girl to “hold up for two seconds”.

Thursday Nightgame:
Went out around 11:30 . While I was waiting in line, there was some drunk dude who was making a commotion so I exchanged glances with the girls in line behind me, but didn’t say much until we entered the bar. Just asked them if it was their first time here because the entry way is a little unique and they huddled up and looked at me when we entered as if they knew me. They went off to the bathroom soon. I wouldn’t really count this as an approach.

But I finally did do a night game approach. Noticed this hot Filipina standing by the bar with her friend. So I just went up to her and asked her how her night was going, she was friendly but I ejected soon after.

Thoughts​

I was kicking myself for not doing more with the Filipina, like at least chatting for longer, but I have to remember that before, I couldn’t even do a single approach at that bar. And I'm gaming solo and sober unlike other dudes there. So there will be initial downsides from that but it'll pan out better in the long run.

If I consistently go out for nightgame 3x a week there will be serious gains. Just gotta stick with it and always keep it challenging. In order to ensure that I don't weasel out of going, I'll put a ColdTurkey block on my laptop from 9pm to midnight. so it'll shut the entire thing down between those hours.

And I don’t know why but it just feels like approaching is much much more fun these days. I feel like I’m getting a ton of approach invites during the day. Partly it’s because I’m in a good mood and partly it’s because I haven’t masturbated in a week, so I’m much more out of my shell. Just today for example, this hot latina with big boobs checked me out as I was walking down the street, one girl on campus made eye contact with me and smiled, and another girl who was out with her friends also made eye contact and smiled. And unrelated to that I opened maybe 5-6 girls and 3 of them were hot. So yea good times.

 

[DarkKnight]

In spite of that, the reactions have been pretty good.

Because your fundamentals are solid dude

And I don’t know why but it just feels like approaching is much much more fun these days

It's like opening a present box on christmas haha. Also when AA becomes history there is only an upside to opening especially when you dont take rejection personally.

 

[Skippy]

Background 4/1/2022 Friday​

Daygame: I went to the tourist trap today but the volume was not good. I opened 3 girls in total and got one phone number. So far I’ve done 11/25 from that exercise. But I need to be extra focused on eye contact. Because I get so caught up in actually opening her that I forget to think about the eye contact and I don’t remember if I did it correctly.

Nightgame: I went to the big gay district and opened 4 groups. This area takes hyperstimulation to the extreme. It makes all of the other nighttime venues seem tame by comparison. Good training, I suppose. The plan was to do Gun’s weak emergency plan B exercise which is opening with a ‘fun, social’ type opener, and then immediately going for a number close. Basically you say “hey can I tell you something...I have that exact same top at home blah blah blah” The first was a pair of girls. I just approached the one I was interested in and didn’t worry about the friend at all. She declined to give her number. Forgot to monitor eye contact.

Then I approached another pair of girls. One was wearing a tight green dress and one was wearing a tight black dress. I originally opened black dress. And she was like “why didn’t you wear it then!” and I said “Oh I but didn’t want to steal your thunder”. Some more banter ensues with black dress girl and she’s beaming so green dress girl gets more engaged actually and asks me what I said. somehow things got reshuffled and I find myself talking to her. But they go into a club shortly. They were actually in a big group. Didn’t have time to number close. or compliment. Again forgot to monitor eye contact.

Next I see a guy with two girls, but notice that he’s holding hands with one of them. Fortunately the other girl is hotter, so I open her, go for the number close, she’s like “yea why not”. Her friend needs to pee and it turns out they’re visiting her from another state. So they go off after she enters her number. I forgot to check my eye contact there.

Finally I opened another pair of girls and they do the same thing “oooh then why didn’t you wear it” . In these cases, it seems I’m not going for the number close because I get hung up on the banter, then ask them how the night is going and then I don’t do anything after that. But anyway...none of this is the focus. The focus is EYE CONTACT remember. And I actually remembered to do that with this set.

So let’s say 11/25 reps completed for exercise A and 1/30 reps completed for exercise B.

Thoughts​

I’ve been to this venue before and while I have opened girls there before, it just hasn’t been as much as this time. Seriously 4 sets in a night is a record. The most I’ve done before is like 1-2. And I bagged my first actual phone number from nightgame. Although this will be a dud. Strongly suspect.

My only actual regret is hesitating too long on these two latinas that were standing around. I guess I didn’t know how to open just one and not the other. Now that I think about it, I guess I could’ve walked by and body-rocked.