Sunshine Journal

[JT Sunshine]

Been a while (again) since I’ve posted. Life continues to be beyond busy, but all the work I am putting in now will pay me huge dividends. I just wish I had more time to play, as the weather is gorgeous out and so are the women.

However, I did make it out last week/weekend for a few approaches and one very interesting adventure…

First of all, damn do I feel rusty! My first approach of the month (I think..?) was a mixed girl, very cute probably late twenties. Standing in a parking lot, watching a car try to back out. I opened over the shoulder mystery style, and asked if she thought they would make it out of the spot before they ran out of gas. She laughed but seemed more interested in her phone.

Next day I was on a walk and saw a VERY pretty girl, also probably late twenties, nerdy vibe with cute glasses a bangin’ body. Almost froze up as our paths crossed, but I mustered up a smile and a “hi”. She gave me a big ass smile back, but nothing else (I noticed the AirPods). In retrospect I should have stopped her and complimented her. I think it would have gone well.

Here is where things get better…

New client at work. She is blonde, 21 years old, the most amazing natural tits I have ever seen, perky ass, and a tight body. Even her name is sexy. I had to google her after our first meeting and she has quite the story, partially from being involved in a newsworthy scandal with a celebrity. Not at all what I was expecting to find, but one of my toxic traits is I love to flirt with fire, and this is the type of girl who is 10/10 hot but could ruin your life. She is definitely trouble. Sign me the fuck up.

If I do hook up with her, it will be slow game, similar to my ex who I worked with for a long time before we became sexually/romantically involved. While this is not my typical style, in my past I have faired quite well by building a slow burning fire with women who I interact with regularly in a business setting. Innocuous sexual undertones, subtle flirting, a little push-pull, and the eventual meet up outside of work where I build that sexual tension to the breaking point. I can see it unfolding already

Met with her on Friday. I held strong eye contact as we spoke, added some light humor into the conversation, and wore a bit of cologne that my ex gave me. She gave great eye contact back, stood so close to me that we were basically touching most of the time, and was 100% engaged in everything I said. It helps I’m considered a bit of an expert in my field. I was able to move the conversation to her personal life a bit, learned about where she grew up, things she likes to do, her love for the outdoors and rooftop patios. We talked about working out and how great it feels.

I imagine most of her conversations are either guys overtly hitting on her, or guys too scared to talk with her at all. I feel we connected great, and I was validated in that thought when less than 20 minutes after she left, I got a follow request from her on instagram. Her photos are insane. She knows exactly what she is doing and I will let her slowly “win me over”. I’m paid by the minute to talk to her anyways. Nothing to lose.

It had been a hot minute since I’d been out to the bars solo, so I decided to hit up the ole saloon and see where the night would take me. Initially got in a conversation with a very drunk, harmless 22 year old college kid. We had a great conversation about nothing, he wants to be my wingman (we’ll see…), and we exchanged numbers. His friends were pretty cool too, much more sober. If nothing else, I found a cool group of guys to shoot the shit with next time I’m downtown.

First approach was another mixed girl, by herself, wearing tight jeans and a little tank top. Super cute. I was standing at the bar waiting to order my one and only (or so I thought) drink of the night. She was waiting behind me. I said “come slide in here, you don’t want to be waiting an hour”. She smiled and pulled up next to me. I complimented her on her outfit choice, we talked a bit about how crazy the bar was, and how funny it was to watch drunk guys interact with the female bartender. Things were light and flirty until her friend showed up, literally grabbed her and pulled her away after she got her drink. Damn.

Next approach I tried a mixed set of 5. Three girls and two guys. I got them to engage for about 20 seconds and then they went back to their conversation and basically ignored me. Oh well.

At this point I decided to try Legacy, it was late and why not. I went out on the patio and scoped the area, but there was no one who piqued my interest. The venue was pretty dead. UNTIL a very sexy blonde girl and a skinny guy who couldn’t be any older than 21 wandered right next to me.

I (wrongfully) assumed he was her boyfriend, and there would be little to no point approaching her. But when I caught her looking at me, I smiled and said hi. She said hi back, and she asked my name.

Her eye contact was solid. Big, beautiful blue eyes that were beaming as she looked at me. The guy she was with was so scrawny he would have simply blown away with even a slight gust of wind, so I wasn’t concerned about flirting with her a bit. We talked about travel, our tattoos, I made sure to touch her early and often. Her skin was so soft. She was giving me all the signs of a girl who was very interested. She finally introduced the guy as her “gay best friend”, and I knew I’d hit 130am gold.

I love the question “if you could do anything you wanted in life with no chance of failure, what would it be?” You can build her up or bust her balls we talked about dreams, our passions in life, all the while playfully touching each other. She asked me what I was doing after the bar, to which I replied “no plans. This is a rare day I don’t work early in the morning, so I am living in the moment and going wherever the night takes me”. She asked if I would like to come back to (presumably her suburb) after to the bar, to which I said yes.

If only it was that easy…

A couple of her friends showed up at that moment and tried to drag her away. This is becoming a theme. I grabbed her hand and said “wait one second… if you have to go that’s fine, but I would love to hang out with you again. Let me take your number before they drag you away”. She laughed and said “I’ll be back in two minutes I promise”

She stood and talked to the friends, and seemed to be arguing with them. I assume they wanted her to leave with them, and she wanted to leave with me. I struck up a conversation with the bartender, who was actually super cool, told me all about the drama with him and his ex (who was also working at that bar), and gave me a free beer and a water. Nice.

It’s been more like ten minutes, but cute blonde shows back up and says “we’re all taking an Uber back, and you’re welcome to come with”. Not exactly ideal, but I decided to join. Tried talking to the friends on the way out but they were very much doing their own thing.

The Uber ride was silent except for me and my girl talking the entire time. It was kind of funny. She had been having car trouble and I think I figured out what was wrong with it. We talked about work, music, relationships. Things were going good. We got back to the house and the two friends immediately left. It was me, blondey, and the gay best friend.

Here is where things got weird, sort of. The gay friend said “she is my bestie, so I need to make sure you’re not creep. Let’s play the question game”. The question game?? Dude asked me all sorts of questions, but after I answered he wanted HER to answer them too. Felt like he was trying to set us up. Lots about relationships, sex, etc. I had fun with it, she seemed a bit embarrassed but to his credit we did get to know each other on a very personal level.

It was HELLA late at this point, this house was weird as hell (and not hers), and she said she has to work in 4 hours but would drive me back to my car on her way home. In hindsight I should have pushed to just go to her place. We had more great, flirty conversation on the drive. We made plans to get ice cream together this week. We exchanged numbers. As she pulled up to my car, I leaned over and made out with her. She is hands down the best kisser I’ve met post-ex-girlfriend. Soft but very sensual. I kept it going for quite a while but broke it off first. Told her I would text her soon so we could hang out, and went home to sleep. Solid ??

Well, when I texted her, I got no reply. That was two days ago. I am thinking of texting her again tomorrow, and if I get radio silence I will call it a loss. I just can’t imagine why…

Did she wake up with buyers remorse? Was she drunk and has a boyfriend? Did I say something that turned her off? I never bought her a drink, and she never asked, so I don’t think she was trying to use me. I just don’t get why we connected so well, shared what I thought was an amazing kiss, then get left on read. Oh well - I had fun regardless!

Out of town married friends staying with me this weekend, so I won’t be going to the bar. I have gotten back into my gym routine, so may strike up a conversation there. Still having sex with the ex, but I am limiting that to a couple of weekdays only. Need to get out more during the day and work on stopping the “moving sets”. That is my goal this week.

Anywho it’s good to be back!

JT

 

[Casanova Newhouse]

Great write up! Seems like an epic adventure. If I had a guess I’d say you got ghosted because she’s got a boyfriend. But why didn’t Gay Bestie say anything?

 

[JT Sunshine]

Thank you! That was my initial thought too. Maybe she has an on-again off-again boyfriend that the gay bestie can't stand? They get in a fight, she goes out and has a couple drinks, entertains the idea of me, then wakes up in the morning missing her boyfriend.

I'll probably never know, but I always like to guess!

 

[Casanova Newhouse]

That's a very plausible guess. Yes, we can never know for sure, but for sure it is fun speculating!

 

[JT Sunshine]

Been busy as ever lately, my assumption that summer would come with lots of free time to roam the streets in search of lovely women has proven false, but I have been making the most of my free time.

Still hanging with the ex a bit, although trying to limit that so I don’t find myself falling back into the comfort of familiarity and losing motivation.

Spent some more time (at work) with my client-crush. She’s started wearing extremely tight pants that show off her perfect ass. It’s hard to focus on anything else. Haven’t made plans outside of work yet as I’m trying to remain professional and not fuck up my career, but we were talking about outdoorsy stuff and I told her she might have to teach me how to paddleboard. Little seed planted. I’ll keep working the slow game and see what happens.

Friday night was exhausted after a 14 hour day, but Saturday I did go out on the town and got some approaches in.

First girl was on the street, dirty blonde and dressed like she had just come from a rave. Not my typical style, but she was cute and in close proximity so I figured why not? Opened with a “hi” and she said hi back, then proceeded to tell me that from the side I looked like Ryan Reynolds. Ha, I don’t get that every day! I told her that I appreciated the compliment and asked how her night was going. Right at this point her male friend came up and started talking to her. I exited the conversation, but she told me to have a good night as I was walking away, so that was positive. A good warm-up. I probably could have plowed on but the night was very young.

I’ve always had the belief that when the night is early, you shouldn’t invest an extreme amount of energy into an interaction unless the girl is an absolute stunner, or is incredibly receptive. If you’re towards the end of the night, and the situation is difficult, it may be best to go for it anyways as there may not be too many more opportunities. This has bit me in the ass before, as I’ve thought “I’ll see her later on” and then never did. On the flip side Ive spent a bunch of time on the first girl I talk to, just to get blown out a couple hours later and have wasted a good portion of the night. Just things to think about!

Next open was a blonde girl by the bar of the first venue I went to. I can’t remember exactly, but I complimented something on her outfit, to which the reaction was positive. Made a little small chit-chat that went nowhere.

Tried a couple pings with girls who were walking through the venue with no luck.

Went to another venue, it was fairly dead but I know the patio bartender, so had a nice conversation with him. As we were talking, a very cute brunette came out to order a drink. She was smoking a crazy colorful looking e-cigarette. I asked her about it and she went on and on about it. Perfect. I found a talker! Told her it complimented her eyes well in hindsight that sounded beyond corny but it was late and I was trying to add in some elements of the conversation turning non-platonic. She seemed to like it. Her friends came out and said “we have to go” and that was that. Dang! Still ended on a positive note as I had the balls to approach, and her nonverbal were all telling me she might have been interested.

Happy that I forced myself to go out solo and talked to some women. Wish I would have tried harder, I feel rusty but that’s a terrible excuse. My mentality going forward will be “if that little voice in my head tells me I should say something, SAY SOMETHING!” I also need to be more direct with my interest/intent. Sure these nice little conversations are fun, and have led to number exchanges/dates/kissing/sex, but I need to “fail forward” as they say, and accelerate my rate of rejections so I can accelerate my success as well.

Talked about it a bit with my ex using some creative framing, and her take is that I don’t get the initial signals of interest that I used to all the time because I look like a 30 year old man, and that girls her age (early to mid twenties) probably assume I am married, or at least boo’d up. Not sure if that’s true or not, but it’s interesting.

Also figured out that what I’m really bad at is starting conversations. Not necessarily the open, as that is as easy as “hi how are you?”, but how to turn that into a real conversation where the woman is hooked. Once I reach that point I’m pretty good at the rest, assuming I don’t chicken out when it comes time to ask for the number/go for the kiss. I think a little time away has made me really understand my sticking points better. I say this a lot, but I mean it this time, I am going full steam ahead this summer and getting this skill figured out!

 

[JT Sunshine]

Almost 3am, back home, get ready for some stream of consciousness rambling. It’s a long drive back from downtown and my mind has been racing.

To take things back a few steps, I decided my goal for August was to compliment or approach a girl every day. 31 girls, 31 days, no exceptions. After tonight I feel as though I may need to adjust my criteria for what an “approach” is, as I find myself beyond frustrated with myself.

Yesterday, August first, was a looooong day of work. I knew I worked early today with my best client, so I needed good rest. After I got home, I sat out on my steps, and saw a very cute girl jogging down my block. I said “hey”, she slowed down and looked at me, with a little smile. I said “I don’t mean to interrupt your run, but you’re looking good!” She smiled HUGE and said “thank you”, but kept running. Bet I made her day. Awesome. Sleep time.

In hindsight I probably could have “policeman style” stopped her and maybe asked her to be my running buddy. I’ve been hitting the gym hard lately but lacking on the cardio. Hindsight is 20/20, and lately it’s been a lot of that for me. Fuck. Day one approach 1/1.

Had a great day today. Got flown out to Green Bay for lunch with my client, threw some sex eyes at a girl working there, made some small talk but didn’t take it anywhere. Not counting that one. She’s being paid to be friendly. Got back home in time to freshen up and hit the town.

First stop saloon bar. Chock full of hotties. As always. I felt rusty, but could make that excuse forever. I’ve been rusty for 11 years. When am I going to officially knock the rust off? I did say hi to a girl that most men would call a “perfect ten”. By far the most attractive girl there. She said hi back with a big smile, and I… didn’t take it anywhere. My inner monologue chocked it up to the fact I was just “warming up”, but I know deep down that’s utter bullshit. Had a good three more opportunities to approach but I was in my head and did not. Decided to leave as I plan to go back tomorrow and didn’t want to look like a loner, and wandered to Legacy.

Legacy was DEAD. Probably 30 men there, and I counted 7 women, who were all 1-1 coupled up. Talked to a couple of random guys to try and get in a social mood, but left within ten mins.

Finally went to the dance club. I’ve been avoiding this place as it’s crowded, loud as fuck, and I’m old. I mean honestly I’m only 33 and not that old, but everyone there is 22 and drunk off their ass. I like to remain sober (two beer limit) as I used alcohol as a crutch back in the day.

Saw a group of three women being hit on by a couple guys who the women CLEARLY weren’t interested in. Props to the guys for going for it, but I slod in next to them and said “what’s up” to the cute blondie closest to me. She replied with “this shit” and pointed to the guys trying their hardest with her friends. I put my hand on her shoulder and said “welcome to downtown” with a little smirk. She seemed receptive, but her friends started to walk off and she followed.

Figured fuck it, I’ll get a beer and go dance my ass off on the dance floor. I am no dancer, but was in a semi-popular rock band when I was 19 and I can move to a beat. They were playing songs that I knew the words to, so I sang along with an animated smile.

I feel this place could actually be a gold mine if I knew how the fuck to interact with women on a dance floor. I got looks galore as most guys out there just stand around, clutching their drinks and ogling the women. I was having fun. But for whatever reason I just didn’t make any moves, because I was in my head thinking “I don’t know what to do here”.

I left at close, saw a cute girl in a cowboy hat walking by and told her “your hat is super cute” but got ignored. I’m sure a lot of guys shoot their shot at 2am… no offense taken.

So here we are. Another night spent with ample opportunity in front of me, another night spent going home alone with nothing to show but a couple of half-assed approaches and less gas in my tank. I am going to rip myself apart a bit here, but just know that I wholeheartedly believe in myself and 100% know this is something I can master.

WHY AM I REJECTING MYSELF?? There are no rules when it comes to night game, women expect to be hit on, I actually look amazing, yet I can’t seem to bring myself to say “hey what’s your name? You look really cute tonight and I wanted to see if there’s more to you than meets the eye.” What is the WORST that could happen? She had a boyfriend? She ignores me? I can’t look any more stupid than I already do bumming around alone, so that’s not it.

I am wondering if I’m afraid of success. That the last two women I went for ended up as years long LTRs, and my one lay since getting back into this STILL messages me three times a day, and I haven’t seen her in a month. My sex game is on point, but it’s GETTING to that point, or even hooking a conversation in general that seems to be my issue.

it’s not helping that I’ve been hanging out with my ex. I know it will end eventually as I don’t want to settle down with her, but we have sex 2-3 times a week and maybe that’s dampening my motivation. My goal is to get GOOD at this, not necessarily to have a great sex life, although I have an insanely high sex drive. Maybe if I just cut the ex off my biological needs will take over and force me to actually game proper.

My final thought is that I need some accountability, and a challenge. I need something that forces me to take action beyond saying “hi” to women and feeling like that’s progress. I’ve heard that humans are motivated more by pain than by pleasure. That we would rather not nose than win. I feel myself falling into both of these paradigms. But the pain of tonight may be enough to propel me forward. My time has become incredibly valuable and the warm months of summer are slipping away. I need to take action and get good at this.

To anyone who reads my journal, I welcome a challenge/mission for me to try. I am at the point where I really need to go all in and stop letting me stop myself from succeeding. I’ve crushed everything else in my life that I’ve wanted badly. Why is this so damn hard???

 

[JT Sunshine]

Third day of August, the goal was to approach or compliment at least one woman today. Crushed it, and feeling great.

If anyone read my post from yesterday, I was mad at myself. I did something last night I haven’t done in ages - get enough sleep. I now honestly believe that being fully rested is a superpower. Keeping this short and sweet so I can get another 8 hours.

Day off, spent the morning with my ex hanging out at her pool. Had some of the better sex we’ve had in weeks. My thought was if we did the dirty early, I might have more motivation later in the day to go approach. The theory proved true.

Found a free concert tonight. Rock/country group, really good. I made three approaches while at the concert. None ended up going anywhere beyond conversation, but for all three I FELT that approach anxiety badly, and I just went for it anyways. By the third one, we actually had some good flirty banter going. Fear is just a mental game.

Went to a bar after the show, and did three more approaches. Two were (unknowingly at the time) with guys, but I talked to the guys a bit and they were very cool with me. Third one was so fucking cute, a little too drunk but very receptive and we had a great interaction.

My biggest realization from tonight is that sleep is important. I’ve been acutely/borderline chronically fatigued for the last month or two, and it’s taken a big unknown toll on me. With rest comes clarity of mind, motivation, and feeling like my fucking self again.

Second realization tonight is I’ve been doing this all backwards. The old school of thought was that you go out at night to get good at talking to women (hard environment) so that you will be good when you see a quality woman you want to meet during the day. Wrong. I should be going out during the day and getting good at approaching/making connections with women so that on the weekend I can be on point and go in for the kill when the environment is more fast paced but also suited for a same-night-pull. Practice during the week so you can go perform on the weekend.

JT is back! Taking action tonight has me on cloud nine. Summer is far from over and I’m ready to grab this world by the balls and make my life what I want of it. My schedule is stacked tomorrow, but I’ll get at least a good approach in. Maybe more…

Cheers!

 

[JT Sunshine]

Day was busy, had no luck finding any hotties at the gas station or subway. Still, I made it happen and met the bare minimum requirement to keep going with my monthly challenge.

Decided my best bet was to go to one of those healthy-type grocery stores and just wander around with some bananas in my hand until I found a woman to approach. There is one close to my house. The three potentials I saw off the bat were all there with a boyfriend/husband. Damn. I knew I wasn’t going home until I got an approach in.

I saw a cute girl in the checkout line, so I pulled up behind her. She looked rather annoyed head down in her phone, but this was my best shot. God damn why do women make me so nervous sometimes I said “hi, how’s it going?” She looked up and said “good”, then head back down again. I couldn’t think of a damn thing to say at this point, so I reengaged with a “is it always this busy here on a Sunday night?” At this point she actually chatted with me for a minute or so about how it was oddly busy, and believe it or not, she smiled. Maybe I was a nice distraction from her phone.

She left, and I proceeded to buy my bananas

I felt totally awkward trying this at a grocery store, but I should do it more to try and get out of my comfort zone. Tomorrow I have a 1.5 hour break, thinking of going to the beach in the rich neighborhood if it’s nice out (find me a sugar momma??), but forecast looks like rain, so maybe I’ll try a mall. I could use a new shirt... but I hate malls. Love women tho

 

[JT Sunshine]

It may sound silly, but today was absolutely life changing. More on that later.

Firstly, for anyone with approach anxiety that responds well to a more "direct" type of motivation, read THIS article on destroying AA.

I have been feeling especially anxious/nervous lately. Sure, I've said hi to a few random cute girls who happened to be standing next to me at a bar or in the grocery line, but the amount of missed opportunities I've had the past two weeks, especially with real STUNNERS, has been absurd. I get nervous and the little negative voice in my head comes up with a million reasons why I shouldn't do it... and 98% of the time, I don't do it. I listen to that voice, and I regret it for hours, days, weeks. Hell, I remember the drop-dead gorgeous girl from Nikki Beach in Miami in 2014 who was shooting me the "fuck-me-eyes" and I didn't even say hi. WASTED. OPPORTUNITY. EVERYWHERE.

Well no more of that. I needed to dwell on the pain of, in simple terms, rejecting myself - for years. I thought back on all the girls I should have said hi to, or asked out, or kissed, or slept with. None of them rejected me... I just didn't try. I rejected myself, plain and simple. As the wise Woody Harrelson once said, it's time to nut up or shut up.

My goal today: approach one woman. Like every other day this month. And instead of just tallying approaches, I was going to tally missed opportunities too. Accountability. I picked what may have been the worst day ever to do so. Torrential downpours, 40mph wind gusts, and I forgot to put on deodorant. Teeth were nicely brushed tho I was sweaty and in my gym clothes (had a great workout sesh to get me fired up), and had been up since 4am. But no excuses today. Play it as it lies.

I just could not fathom going to the mall. Luckily after the gym, the rain had let up a bit, so I decided to go downtown in hopes of catching the office crowd leaving work. I picked a trendy neighborhood near the city center, with a bunch of old warehouses turned expensive apartments, condos, and bars catering to the late 20s/early 30s crowd. I parked, popped 50 minutes into the meter, and off I went. I could feel the nerves as I stepped out of my car.

After walking a couple of blocks, I spotted a girl walking two dogs. Hard to make out her face, but seemed about my age. As I got closer I saw she was definitely not my type. I did not engage. Did see a woman standing under an awning, on the phone and not smiling. Very attractive however. See what I did there? Excuses! I didn't approach, and added that to my missed opportunities list. 0-1. Turned the corner and by now the rain and wind was back in full force. I decided to pop in a restaurant and see if I could make an approach in there. There were two girls walking up to the door behind me, and I even held it for them, but didn't say ANYTHING. Like a scared little boy. 0-2.

The server/bartended was an absolute cutie. Easily a 9 if you were so inclined to rating women. And she was flirty with me. Not the fake-flirty you see with most servers, but smiling eyes that pierced the soul, looking at me like I was a juicy steak and she hadn't eaten in weeks. Either she has that down better than any other server I've encountered, or she genuinely thought I was hot. Either way she was busy as hell so I didn't get to chat as much as I'd have liked. Not counting this as an approach or a missed opportunity. I asked her name and if I ever go back and bump into her at least I'll know what too call her.

I was losing hope when a group of four women sat down next to me. All very cute. I thought up about 6 openers in my head, but my scared ass just couldn't force myself to say anything. I had already paid the bill. I left. 0-3. I stood at the door staring out into the wind and the rain. I had 6 minutes left on my meter. I had plans immediately after, lasting until 9pm. I did not want to go to the 24-hour walmart at night to try and get my approach today.

As I stepped out into that rain, something snapped inside my head. Maybe it was thought of all the squandered opportunities of the past mixed with the fresh wounds of today being washed away by the warm rain, but I told myself I would not fucking fail myself again.

And there she was. A blonde, about my height, probably 25 years old, holding an umbrella and looking like she walked right off the cover of a magazine in her little short shorts. The most jaw-dropping woman I've seen all summer. My exact type, and also the type of woman I've been scared to talk to my whole life. She was about half a block ahead of me walking in the direction of my car. I knew I had to huff it if I was going to catch up to her. I was drenched and in smelly gym clothes, and she was looking down at her phone. Did you see what I did there? EXCUSES! But not this time, you fucked-up-little-negative voice. I got about two strides in front of her, then over the shoulder said "you're really smart for bringing that umbrella today". I sounded confident, relaxed, I held eye contact, with a slight smile. And you know what? She smiled back at me BIG and said "where's yours?" with a laugh. I walked with her and said "back at my house, not doing me any good". She laughed again. And fellas, for the first time, in a long time, I felt like I was on cloud nine. THIS is what I've been afraid of? I had all the excuses in world, and I fought myself to approach my first true "ten" of the summer.

I am going to have so much fun with this now. Maybe I've been struggling as of late because I've been only approaching girls who are out of my league - because they weren't even in it to begin with. It's time I go for what I really want. This is a new chapter boys, and I can't wait to see what the rest of the week has in store for me.

 

[Casanova Newhouse]

It may sound silly, but today was absolutely life changing. More on that later.

Firstly, for anyone with approach anxiety that responds well to a more "direct" type of motivation, read THIS article on destroying AA.

I have been feeling especially anxious/nervous lately. Sure, I've said hi to a few random cute girls who happened to be standing next to me at a bar or in the grocery line, but the amount of missed opportunities I've had the past two weeks, especially with real STUNNERS, has been absurd. I get nervous and the little negative voice in my head comes up with a million reasons why I shouldn't do it... and 98% of the time, I don't do it. I listen to that voice, and I regret it for hours, days, weeks. Hell, I remember the drop-dead gorgeous girl from Nikki Beach in Miami in 2014 who was shooting me the "fuck-me-eyes" and I didn't even say hi. WASTED. OPPORTUNITY. EVERYWHERE.

Well no more of that. I needed to dwell on the pain of, in simple terms, rejecting myself - for years. I thought back on all the girls I should have said hi to, or asked out, or kissed, or slept with. None of them rejected me... I just didn't try. I rejected myself, plain and simple. As the wise Woody Harrelson once said, it's time to nut up or shut up.

My goal today: approach one woman. Like every other day this month. And instead of just tallying approaches, I was going to tally missed opportunities too. Accountability. I picked what may have been the worst day ever to do so. Torrential downpours, 40mph wind gusts, and I forgot to put on deodorant. Teeth were nicely brushed tho I was sweaty and in my gym clothes (had a great workout sesh to get me fired up), and had been up since 4am. But no excuses today. Play it as it lies.

I just could not fathom going to the mall. Luckily after the gym, the rain had let up a bit, so I decided to go downtown in hopes of catching the office crowd leaving work. I picked a trendy neighborhood near the city center, with a bunch of old warehouses turned expensive apartments, condos, and bars catering to the late 20s/early 30s crowd. I parked, popped 50 minutes into the meter, and off I went. I could feel the nerves as I stepped out of my car.

After walking a couple of blocks, I spotted a girl walking two dogs. Hard to make out her face, but seemed about my age. As I got closer I saw she was definitely not my type. I did not engage. Did see a woman standing under an awning, on the phone and not smiling. Very attractive however. See what I did there? Excuses! I didn't approach, and added that to my missed opportunities list. 0-1. Turned the corner and by now the rain and wind was back in full force. I decided to pop in a restaurant and see if I could make an approach in there. There were two girls walking up to the door behind me, and I even held it for them, but didn't say ANYTHING. Like a scared little boy. 0-2.

The server/bartended was an absolute cutie. Easily a 9 if you were so inclined to rating women. And she was flirty with me. Not the fake-flirty you see with most servers, but smiling eyes that pierced the soul, looking at me like I was a juicy steak and she hadn't eaten in weeks. Either she has that down better than any other server I've encountered, or she genuinely thought I was hot. Either way she was busy as hell so I didn't get to chat as much as I'd have liked. Not counting this as an approach or a missed opportunity. I asked her name and if I ever go back and bump into her at least I'll know what too call her.

I was losing hope when a group of four women sat down next to me. All very cute. I thought up about 6 openers in my head, but my scared ass just couldn't force myself to say anything. I had already paid the bill. I left. 0-3. I stood at the door staring out into the wind and the rain. I had 6 minutes left on my meter. I had plans immediately after, lasting until 9pm. I did not want to go to the 24-hour walmart at night to try and get my approach today.

As I stepped out into that rain, something snapped inside my head. Maybe it was thought of all the squandered opportunities of the past mixed with the fresh wounds of today being washed away by the warm rain, but I told myself I would not fucking fail myself again.

And there she was. A blonde, about my height, probably 25 years old, holding an umbrella and looking like she walked right off the cover of a magazine in her little short shorts. The most jaw-dropping woman I've seen all summer. My exact type, and also the type of woman I've been scared to talk to my whole life. She was about half a block ahead of me walking in the direction of my car. I knew I had to huff it if I was going to catch up to her. I was drenched and in smelly gym clothes, and she was looking down at her phone. Did you see what I did there? EXCUSES! But not this time, you fucked-up-little-negative voice. I got about two strides in front of her, then over the shoulder said "you're really smart for bringing that umbrella today". I sounded confident, relaxed, I held eye contact, with a slight smile. And you know what? She smiled back at me BIG and said "where's yours?" with a laugh. I walked with her and said "back at my house, not doing me any good". She laughed again. And fellas, for the first time, in a long time, I felt like I was on cloud nine. THIS is what I've been afraid of? I had all the excuses in world, and I fought myself to approach my first true "ten" of the summer.

I am going to have so much fun with this now. Maybe I've been struggling as of late because I've been only approaching girls who are out of my league - because they weren't even in it to begin with. It's time I go for what I really want. This is a new chapter boys, and I can't wait to see what the rest of the week has in store for me.

Inspirational my friend! I love that feeling of busting through your anxiety. Who knows what incredible possibilities lie on the other side?

 

[JT Sunshine]

Inspirational my friend! I love that feeling of busting through your anxiety. Who knows what incredible possibilities lie on the other side?

Thank you! I cannot wait to find out

 

[JT Sunshine]

Today was not as awe-inspiring as yesterday, but keeping my August streak alive as best I can... I worked 14 hours today with only a 30 minute break. Can't say I didn't try to get a good approach in - on my short break I went to a grocery store, a deli, and the gas station. No women under 70 to be found at any. I could have gone to the little beach that's 12 minutes away and had 6 minutes to hopefully see a girl and approach, but I was meeting with my client-crush right after and opted to have a sandwich and not let my car run out of gas instead.

There is a new girl where I work who I haven't talked to. She's a bit chunky, but has beautiful blonde hair, a very cute face and something about her just screams sex. If we were alone somewhere and she stuck her hands down my pants I wouldn't protest one bit I asked the manager to help me with something earlier and she pawned it off on the new girl. In front of client-crush, I went up to new girl said hi, and thanked her for helping me. She was very warm and smiley. Not going to risk my professional rep over her, but I'm going to start flirting with her if she puts in her notice someday, I will definitely invite her out for a drink lol.

Client crush was dressed down today, and I think she regretted it. Caught her putting on lipstick as I was coming back from the bathroom. We had a nice chat for a couple of hours. I was tired but threw a couple teases her way. I think it unintentionally gave off a bit of a playful "I don't give a fuck" vibe and she was digging it. Our conversation drifted away to movies, making up fun little stories, I felt like I've finally broken through the wall and started getting to know this chick's playful side. She told me her travel plans for the week fell through because her friends canceled on her, and she actually seemed a little sad. She said she's just going to have fun on her own. I briefly thought about inviting her to do something. But it felt uncalibrated, and I have a game plan with this one. Instead, I told her about the fun solo vacations I've been on and gave her a suggestion for one. When I see her next week I'll ask her how it went, and if it was anything less than stellar, I will say "I should have just invited you to ____" ... if the reaction is positive, then I'm in. I've done this before. I will start working in more sexual topics of conversation. Get her thinking about sex every time she's around me. Then when we finally hang out, I ramp up the flirting and playful touching. It's on.

As I'm walking in from the parking lot I see a hot girl walking out. She's clearly not going to hold the door for me, even though we made eye contact and smiled. I turned and said "thank you" loudly, and let the door hit me a little as she turned. "For the door" I said, with a big ass cheeky smile. She let out a nervous laugh I had a little laugh about it too.

That's it for today. Made the best of my 14 hours. Talked to two women I never had met before and felt I did really well with the one I had. I'm off part of tomorrow and plan to get a good approach or three in. The trickiest part is going to be FINDING a good place to approach. Thinking parks downtown may be my best bet. The weather looks perfect, but weekday daytime has proved a challenge. I need to location scout tomorrow. Could always hit up a brewery if all else fails.

Until next time,

 

[bgwh]

It may sound silly, but today was absolutely life changing. More on that later.

Firstly, for anyone with approach anxiety that responds well to a more "direct" type of motivation, read THIS article on destroying AA.

I have been feeling especially anxious/nervous lately. Sure, I've said hi to a few random cute girls who happened to be standing next to me at a bar or in the grocery line, but the amount of missed opportunities I've had the past two weeks, especially with real STUNNERS, has been absurd. I get nervous and the little negative voice in my head comes up with a million reasons why I shouldn't do it... and 98% of the time, I don't do it. I listen to that voice, and I regret it for hours, days, weeks. Hell, I remember the drop-dead gorgeous girl from Nikki Beach in Miami in 2014 who was shooting me the "fuck-me-eyes" and I didn't even say hi. WASTED. OPPORTUNITY. EVERYWHERE.

Well no more of that. I needed to dwell on the pain of, in simple terms, rejecting myself - for years. I thought back on all the girls I should have said hi to, or asked out, or kissed, or slept with. None of them rejected me... I just didn't try. I rejected myself, plain and simple. As the wise Woody Harrelson once said, it's time to nut up or shut up.

My goal today: approach one woman. Like every other day this month. And instead of just tallying approaches, I was going to tally missed opportunities too. Accountability. I picked what may have been the worst day ever to do so. Torrential downpours, 40mph wind gusts, and I forgot to put on deodorant. Teeth were nicely brushed tho I was sweaty and in my gym clothes (had a great workout sesh to get me fired up), and had been up since 4am. But no excuses today. Play it as it lies.

I just could not fathom going to the mall. Luckily after the gym, the rain had let up a bit, so I decided to go downtown in hopes of catching the office crowd leaving work. I picked a trendy neighborhood near the city center, with a bunch of old warehouses turned expensive apartments, condos, and bars catering to the late 20s/early 30s crowd. I parked, popped 50 minutes into the meter, and off I went. I could feel the nerves as I stepped out of my car.

After walking a couple of blocks, I spotted a girl walking two dogs. Hard to make out her face, but seemed about my age. As I got closer I saw she was definitely not my type. I did not engage. Did see a woman standing under an awning, on the phone and not smiling. Very attractive however. See what I did there? Excuses! I didn't approach, and added that to my missed opportunities list. 0-1. Turned the corner and by now the rain and wind was back in full force. I decided to pop in a restaurant and see if I could make an approach in there. There were two girls walking up to the door behind me, and I even held it for them, but didn't say ANYTHING. Like a scared little boy. 0-2.

The server/bartended was an absolute cutie. Easily a 9 if you were so inclined to rating women. And she was flirty with me. Not the fake-flirty you see with most servers, but smiling eyes that pierced the soul, looking at me like I was a juicy steak and she hadn't eaten in weeks. Either she has that down better than any other server I've encountered, or she genuinely thought I was hot. Either way she was busy as hell so I didn't get to chat as much as I'd have liked. Not counting this as an approach or a missed opportunity. I asked her name and if I ever go back and bump into her at least I'll know what too call her.

I was losing hope when a group of four women sat down next to me. All very cute. I thought up about 6 openers in my head, but my scared ass just couldn't force myself to say anything. I had already paid the bill. I left. 0-3. I stood at the door staring out into the wind and the rain. I had 6 minutes left on my meter. I had plans immediately after, lasting until 9pm. I did not want to go to the 24-hour walmart at night to try and get my approach today.

As I stepped out into that rain, something snapped inside my head. Maybe it was thought of all the squandered opportunities of the past mixed with the fresh wounds of today being washed away by the warm rain, but I told myself I would not fucking fail myself again.

And there she was. A blonde, about my height, probably 25 years old, holding an umbrella and looking like she walked right off the cover of a magazine in her little short shorts. The most jaw-dropping woman I've seen all summer. My exact type, and also the type of woman I've been scared to talk to my whole life. She was about half a block ahead of me walking in the direction of my car. I knew I had to huff it if I was going to catch up to her. I was drenched and in smelly gym clothes, and she was looking down at her phone. Did you see what I did there? EXCUSES! But not this time, you fucked-up-little-negative voice. I got about two strides in front of her, then over the shoulder said "you're really smart for bringing that umbrella today". I sounded confident, relaxed, I held eye contact, with a slight smile. And you know what? She smiled back at me BIG and said "where's yours?" with a laugh. I walked with her and said "back at my house, not doing me any good". She laughed again. And fellas, for the first time, in a long time, I felt like I was on cloud nine. THIS is what I've been afraid of? I had all the excuses in world, and I fought myself to approach my first true "ten" of the summer.

I am going to have so much fun with this now. Maybe I've been struggling as of late because I've been only approaching girls who are out of my league - because they weren't even in it to begin with. It's time I go for what I really want. This is a new chapter boys, and I can't wait to see what the rest of the week has in store for me.

Good stuff man, keep going.

Today was not as awe-inspiring as yesterday, but keeping my August streak alive as best I can... I worked 14 hours today with only a 30 minute break.

We seem to have this in common. I'm also stuck doing 16 hour workdays due some business I'm launching. Only end up approaching when I have to go grab groceries. Similar to you though I do have spots minutes away with foot traffic.

What are your thoughts on this? Maybe taking more short breaks? Like go out for "work breaks" do a couple of circles, very shortly?

 

[JT Sunshine]

Good stuff man, keep going.


We seem to have this in common. I'm also stuck doing 16 hour workdays due some business I'm launching. Only end up approaching when I have to go grab groceries. Similar to you though I do have spots minutes away with foot traffic.

What are your thoughts on this? Maybe taking more short breaks? Like go out for "work breaks" do a couple of circles, very shortly?

Those are my thoughts exactly. Tomorrow I'm looking at only 11 hours, but I am going to make a point of taking a couple short breaks and walk for 10 mins and back down the trail nearby, or hang out by the baseball field across the street where I occasionally see girls walking dogs. Just have to make the best of it and hope they're out and about at the same time as we are

 

[JT Sunshine]

Some good learning today and I was able to get two approaches in. Also missed 4 good opportunities. Using that as motivation.

The big debate in my mind this morning - do I walk around my own residential neighborhood and hopefully find some women to talk to, or do I drive 30 mins (and back) to the city center, where there would be, in theory, more women. Decided to start with my neighborhood, and walked for 40 minutes before seeing a woman. Lucky for me she was gorgeous, mixed, maybe 28ish? She was with her dog talking to another woman in her front yard. I immediately felt the nerves when she made eye contact with me, sooner than I expected, but before I could talk myself out of it I blurted out a loud, friendly "hi", and waved. Why did I wave? No clue she gave me a weird look and after a second said hi back. I said "how are you??" and she replied "good", then turned back to talking with her friend. At the time I felt like she didn't want to talk, but in hindsight I bet she was wondering if I knew her. I was too animated. Funny.

Decided it would be best to drive downtown. I need to find good daytime locations and my neighborhood just ain't it.

Made the unwise decision to take the scenic route through the college campus on the way there. Tons of road construction and added 30 mins to my drive. Lesson learned. When I arrived I was blown away. The scene was vibrant. More people out and about than I'd seen since before covid. I was honestly overwhelmed. The good news is I now have a sure-fire spot to practice day game. I spent a while walking around and have a good handle on where the high-foot-traffic areas are. I did freeze up for FOUR, yes four great approach opportunities. Idk why. That voice in my head was saying "look around, no one else is approaching, you would look weird!" Again, in hindsight, this is a good thing. Literally zero competition.

I was not leaving without an approach. Not today. I saw a short blonde with a Rolling Stones t-shirt on, just standing. I walked straight up and said "Hi, do you know where there's a patio around here?" she gave me some directions to one, then said "I hope you're not one of the assholes who goes out there to smash bottles". I replied "it's too early to be smashing bottles, but can't promise I'm not an asshole" with a smile. She laughed, and I told her to have a nice day.

Happy I approached, and even flirted a bit, but I could have done better. My streak continues, but now I need to build some momentum and get even more out of my comfort zone. I work a lot tomorrow but will use any free time to go out and get some approaches in. Also have two hours blocked off Friday for some day game, and I'm planning to go out both Friday and Saturday night.

I've waited too damn long, and I'm not resting until I get over my own excuses and get good at this. There is no stopping me!

 

[JT Sunshine]

Got in three approaches today, all before noon! I had an early cancellation and decided to go location scouting. My new mantra is that no matter where I go - a park, a grocery store, a bar, wherever, I will not leave until I make at least one approach unless there are genuinely no attractive girls there.

First location we’ll call “the cove”. Waterfront boardwalk with some fancy boutique shops and luxury apartments. I parked a block away and as I was walking up I saw a STUNNER turn the corner past me. She was on the phone and I should have just approached anyways but I bitched out. Missed opportunities - 1. Still, I was excited to see that there were lots of people walking around on a Thursday morning. The weather is truly spectacular.

As I got near the end of the boardwalk I came up on a two set, both were probably late 20s/early 30s, blonde, pretty cute. I heard them talking about the weather getting colder. Decided instead of opening them from behind and seeming like a potential creep, I would walk slightly past them then open over the shoulder, mystery style. I jumped right into their conversation with “it feels like the start of summer was just yesterday, doesn’t it?” They both agreed and I walked with them and we talked about how nice it actually was for a bit. Told em to have a nice day, and ejected. Hell yeah! 1-1

I was coming up on a stoplight when I saw a tall beautiful blonde, walking a little dog and pushing a baby stroller. That voice in my head told me I couldn’t open a woman walking a baby. I told that voice to fuck straight off.

Decided I’d try to non verbally get her attention, then open. I stood next to her at the red light, pulled out my phone, and laughed. As I predicted she looked over at me, and looked back and we made eye contact and a smile. I looked her up and down, then said “you have a very cute dog”. She started talking to me all about her dog. I think she was Russian, thick accent for sure. When the light turned green I told her to have a nice day and walked off. 2-1.

Didn’t see anyone on the way back to the car. As I had more time, I decided to scout one more spot. We’ll call it “spiral park”. Although I’ve surpassed my approach for the day, I must stick to my mantra. I must approach at least one girl at the next location.

This spot turned out to be a bit of a bust. Not going to write it off completely as it may be better on a weekend, but the talent just wasn’t there. Did see a hottie jogging by, but I didn’t approach. “She’s jogging” was the best excuse my mind could come up with. 2-2

Ventured a bit further and I saw a couple of cuties walking in my direction at a slight angle. Lunch break office-types. I couldn’t for the fucking life of me think of anything to say, so I said “hey… is that bridge over there still closed?” They stopped and told me it was. I said “dang, okay, thank you!” And walked off. For my lamest approach today I actually felt the best about it. They were moving, in the opposite direction of me, and it was two girls. A week ago I wouldn’t have even tried it. 3-2. I win!

All in all a great day. Approached two sets of two, both moving, and a hot chick with a baby. The excuses are still there in my head, but I’m getting better and better about ignoring them and doing the approach anyways. And I’m having fucking FUN!

Side note, I am going to keep recording the angles/positioning of my daytime sets. Once I get a good volume of data hopefully I can find some patterns that work better and try to position myself better.

 

[bgwh]

I told that voice to fuck straight off.

Loved this and chuckled reading it. This could be a movie quote. Also can relate. Telling that voice to fuck off was my biggest breakthrough.

Also love the idea of tracking angles and positioning.

 

[JT Sunshine]

Had a pretty fun night last night. Long workday today and I’m pretty beat from being out so late, even without writing up a debrief last night. I need to quit working on weekends. I took some notes on my phone however, so here’s a brief write up.

Made 4 approaches total.

The venue and rooftop patio was pretty packed despite the cool temps outside. Got opened by a couple of guys randomly fairly soon after arriving. Pretty sure they were both there looking to approach women, and talking to me in between sets kept them looking social.

The second guy was funny - after asking me about the venue (it was his first time there) he said “watch this” and opened a couple of hotties by saying “are you guys drinking tonight?” they said “yeah…” and he said “here come take a spot my the bar” and pulled them up in between me and him. They looked a bit uncomfortable, but I thought maybe he would try talking to the one by him and I could play wingman with the friend. However, all he said was “I was just talking to my buddy” and pointed to me.

Well now wtf do I do I smiled and said “hi, I’m JT”. I got a halfhearted hi back. This set was pretty much a bust from the get go. I said “it’s a beautiful night for a drink outside, who are you guys here with?” They said someone’s name, and asked if I could help get their attention. They started screaming at their friend, so I jokingly yelled for their friend too. It was really weird. Afterwards the guy gave me knuckles like that was the coolest thing ever. I do appreciate him setting me up! Also if he happens to be on this forum reading this I’m sorry I didn’t wing you better not sure where I could have taken this one, but a decent warm up.

I started walking to the other side of the patio and there was a girl walking opposite direction. She gave me great eye contact and a shy little smile. I opened with “looks like we’re both stuck in traffic! I’m never getting that way, you’re never getting that way, we’ll just be standing here all night!” She smiled back and said “haha it’s so busy in here isn’t it” then asked if I was having fun. I bantered with her for a bit until the traffic jam ended, and I said “see you later” with another smile, to which she said back “see ya!!”

Definitely hooked that one, my body language was on point, strong smiling eye contact and a flirty vibe. I had fun with it, and she reciprocated. I need to try and make every interaction like this, especially in a night setting. I should have taken mental note of where she went and reopened later, because I could tell she liked me and she was SO cute.

After this I got opened by another guy, apologizing for his wasted friend. We actually had a great 20 minute conversation about sports, and he ended up being my buddy for the night, which was great, because these solo night adventures can get a bit lonely in between sets, which tends to get me in my head. Him and 7 other guys were there all splitting into pairs to talk to pairs of girls. We discussed some game strategy, then I told him I was going to go find a girl to open and bid him adieu.

Ended up wedged in next to a blonde girl talking to a friend, who was speaking very animatedly and kept bumping my elbow with hers. I wondered if she was doing this on purpose. There was an empty drink can in front of her, so I put my hand on her shoulder and said “how are these? I’ve never had one before.” She turned to me, big ass smile, and said “it’s good but I thought it was yours. I’m just fucking with you”. She was druuunk. She kept saying “I’d fuck with you but I wouldn’t make you pay for it”. Was she hinting she wanted a drink but wasn’t going to ask me to buy her one? Was she implying she’d fuck me without monetary exchange? Is that a normal thing for her?

The dude I had been talking to popped up next to me so I told drunky to have a good night, and shot the breeze with dude for a bit. By this time it was getting very late and I had to work today so I figured I’d leave. I regret not getting dude’s insta cause he could have been a very good wing. Oh well, he says he’s down there all the time so I’m sure I’ll bump into him again.

Here’s the fucking weird part of the night. I feel someone tug my shirt, and it’s the gay best friend of the blonde girl I made out with a few weeks back. I give him a hi, and he taps blondie (who is clearly flirting with some other guy) and says “look who it is!” she gives me a half hearted hi. I say “hi”, again with a big smile, and say “what brings you out tonight?” “I’m just out with some of my friends…” she replied, in a tone that sounded borderline annoyed. “Well, nice to see you” I said, and left. What happened with this girl?? Maybe that was her boyfriend, she made out with me at 3am and hates me for it. I will never know, and that’s okay.

Headed downstairs and out I see a super hot girl in bright red cowboy boots walking up. I stopped her and said “hi, I just wanted to tell you that those are the cutest boots I’ve seen all night.” She started beaming and said “omg thank you!!!” I definitely made her night.

Proud that I made some real approaches as opposed to half-stepping and hoping to hook on my looks. Met three cool guys too. Spent more time in conversation than not. I feel a breakthrough coming!

When I actually get going, my social skills are so far ahead of these young dudes, if I can hook sets I bet I can take them far as fuck. I need to keep pushing and trying to get the number/IG at least. Time to shower, shave, and hit the night round two (got one little day approach in today, so tonight is bonus round)

Cheers

 

[JT Sunshine]

Another solo night game session in the books, did 5 approaches (7 total on the day). From a purely technical standpoint I did much better than last night, but it has done nothing but leave me wanting more. I want to get everything out in a debrief while it's still fresh in my head, so pardon the stream-of-consciousness rambling.

Got two "warm up" approaches in before going out tonight. One on the street, one at a gas station. Street approach the woman had two little kids with her, I wasn't going for anything other than a warmup, she was friendly, blah blah. Gas station girl was holding a crossword puzzle. Probably in her 40s which is older than my liking, but very fit and very cute. I said "that's impressive - you've gotten like 2/3 of that thing done. I can never finish them." she looked at me funny and didn't say anything. RBF for days. I held eye contact and said "good shit", while nodding in approval. Her face suddenly softened and she thanked me, said she loves it when she takes a wild guess on the first word and it comes out be true. We talked for a solid minute about crossword puzzles before it was her turn in line and my turn to leave.

Fast forward and I'm at the venue. A girl gets pushed into me. We both make eye contact. I say "it's all good - how's the night?" she tells me she's been waiting for 15 minutes for a drink. I bet her that I get asked what I want (water - stay hydrated) before her, even though I just got there. Told her I would make the bartender take her order first. She loves the idea, touches my shoulder and laughs, and asks me how old I am. I tell her I'm 33, she says "damn, I'm 23, turning 24 in a week!" We figure out we're damn near birthday buddies, and I keep the banter going for a solid ten mins. She asked if I was married. I said no. Maybe there's something to what my ex said about me looking the age where I would be married or boo'd up? I could have easily gotten a number, but she really wasn't my type. Life is too short, it was early, but I had so much fun talking to her. Apparently, she did too, as she said "I'm not sold on this venue, but if everyone here was like you, it would be great. Seriously, you made my whole night!" I wished us a happy early birthday and told her to sing something amazing for me when she does karaoke next weekend. I overheard her talking to her friends about me as she walked back to them.

Two short little blonde girls were to my left, the one closest looked visibly annoyed with the wait time at the bar. I made eye contact over the shoulder and said "they're moving extra slooow tonight" I got a little forced laugh. Asked how her night was going, and got a "fine". I didn't get the vibe she was annoyed with me, but with life in general. Got my water #2 and as I walked away I put my arm around her and said "good luck". She gave me a half smile, rolled her eyes and said "thanks".

I saw a super hot blonde with a friend, both pouring salt on their hands. I tapped blonde on the shoulder and said "tequila doesn't hit as hard without that salt, eh?" she said "you neeed it", then threw back her shot and started sucking on the salt. I said "cheers" and she smiled, but turned away to talk to her friend.

After I talked to a guy who was macking on by far the hottest bartender. He was actually doing pretty well all things considered, so we bullshitted for a bit about our love for women with big tits, and the joys of motorboating. Sounds juvenile, but I'm easily the oldest person at the venue by at least 5 years. I see a guy proposing to a girl... or so it seems... at this trashy country bar. I wouldn't have believed it, but the friends were all going nuts. After I said bye to mister motorboat, I walked right up to her (beautiful, by the way) and said "I have to ask - did I just see you get proposed to??" She said yes and I followed up with "I have to ask this as well.. what did you say?" obviously a yes.

My good buddy has been blowing up my phone for a while now, so I went over to a table to see what he's said. I look up for a second and see an ADORABLE blonde girl across the table form me. Almost automatically I said "hi", then looked back down at my phone. She says "I really like your shirt". I look up and say "thank you, I just got it. You're looking quite nice yourself!" she asks me about my tattoos, and I talk about them, add in a couple funny stories. She tells me about the one she has, very sweet, sentimental about her grandfather. I pull up my instagram and show her some fun stuff I did with my grandpa. She asked me how old I was. "I'm 33" I said. Her eyed widened a bit. "Damn, you look really good for 33!" "I take really, reeally good care of myself". Thing are going GOOD, until a dude and his buddy shows up with a drink for her and him, puts his arm around her and says "who's this?"

It was the boyfriend. Fuck.

I introduce myself to him, to the friend, and engage them both in conversation. Find out about their college majors, where they are from, then slowly work my conversation back to the girl. When I talked to her, I gave her the strongest eye contact I could. She had really beautiful, vibrant blue eyes. I was in lust. She stared back into my eyes with a mesmerized look, and we talked for quite a while her boyfriend *literally* had one arm around her and the other in his phone. I was hoping he would leave, so I could quick get her number, but he was planted. Then I hear a voice saying "EVERYBODY OUT". The bar was closing. The night was over. I spent the end of the night having a truly wonderful conversation with a girl who was very interested, but logistically unavailable.

Perspective is crazy. Two weeks ago I was scared to approach. Now I'm sitting here mad as fuck that I flirted with a hottie who was unavailable, and have to wait until tomorrow to get back out there and try again.

My takeaways from tonight are that I have killed my AA with "easy" sets. Close proximity, something I can situationally open with. If I never push myself further, I could probably end up with some lays working this angle. But that's not good enough. I need to start approaching the hard sets. Also, I hooked two girls really, really well. It wasn't anything I said, but a fun vibe, strong eye contact, and a conscious effort to keep the conversation going.

I need to improve on screening for logistics, and setting a sexual "man to woman" frame. Let's see what I can cook up for tomorrow.

 

[JT Sunshine]

Random thought I want to get out before I fall asleep and forget - I wonder if I should go up to a girl, start talking to her about pure nonsense but act like we've been friends forever, then make up an excuse as to why I have to leave but say "you seem really cool. Would should hang out sometime" and get her number. Meet up later, turn the conversation to sex, find a stupid excuse to go back home, and BOOM!

Will field test...