Sunshine Journal

[bgwh]

The fear of success definetely resonates.

 

[JT Sunshine]

Welp, another year down. By my calculations I did about 110 approaches, with a handful of numbers, kisses, and two new lays. Not where I wanted to be, but any positive result is better than not trying. And I learned a hell of a lot.

Goal for this year is to do an approach a day all year. Rain, shine, snowstorm, plague... I am getting it done. And I'll be tracking the metrics diligently like I did the first few months I started this.

Happy 2025 skilled seducers! May the new year bring you health, happiness, and bountiful hotties.

 

[JT Sunshine]

Three days and three approaches into 2025. Nothing much to celebrate yet, but I'm taking the challenge of winter head-on and actually having a bit of fun.

While I can sit here all I want and yearn for the days of warm weather, girls out and about in parks, beaches and on rooftop patios, it is straight-up FREEZING out. However, I have three things going for me: I am fairly talented at ice hockey, skiing, and I love me some good Asian food. I am going to spend this season getting good at some winter sports, approaching cute women while I do it, and hopefully finding some of the best Asian cuisine in town...

First approach was at an outdoor ice rink. Two girls and two guys there, probably dating each other but I didn't care. It was New Year's day and I wasn't going to fuck up my goal on day one. As I'm lacing up the cute brunette skates near me and I open with "how's the ice?" we chat for a bit, purely platonic but it was nice to talk to a super cute girl in front of her (probably) boyfriend. They all left soon after but she got to see me tear it up. Felt good.

Day two was at a new mall. Well, new to me. Typically can't stand malls but this place was supposed to have some of the best Korean BBQ around. Did not disappoint. As I am waiting in line I see a woman walk by me with possibly the nicest ass in tight leggings of 2025. Middle-eastern, maybe 25. She turns back around and we make eye contact. I smile and hold it. Hold it... hold it....... she cracks a big smile, and I say "hi". She says "hi" back, keeps walking. Barely an approach but I'll count it for now. I also chatted up the cute ass girl who took my order, but I won't count that one. She seemed impressed at how well I could pronounce things in Korean. Maybe I can use that to my advantage...

Day three I went skiing with a buddy. He's damn near a pro, I'm talented but rusty. We had a lot of fun. Chatted up a cute little blonde in the lift line. Super friendly, mostly talked about skiing, parted ways when the chair came. Felt good and my buddy (who is very shy), could not stop talking about it after maybe if I ever get good at this I can show him the ropes...

Also went to the gym and saw two total BADDIES. While it is an environment I frequent, it's still very intimidating for me. I never see anyone talking, I'm not quite where I want to be physically yet, but maybe I need to man up and bring the good vibes. I should get off the machines and do more with free-weights, ditch the earbuds and just ask girls about their workout routines and what they like. Idk. Seems like a treasure trove but I also want to keep going there to work out and not be "that guy" who is just trying to pick up. It's probably all about the frame.

Goal for the weekend/week/forever is to REALLY get into some more daygame. I've traditionally been much more of a night gamer, but I have a lot going on and being up til 3am is not something I can do more than 1-2x a week. If I can get proficient at daygame to where it brings me numbers/dates/lays I wouldn't be super sad about ditching the bars... at least until summer. I cannot turn down a good rooftop patio. I have a lunch "date" with an old flame tomorrow - perks of ending things cordially. Gym in the morning, which means (scary) opportunity. Might go back to the mall in the evening and try opening with a compliment, then just stacking forward as we used to say. Work schedule has gotten lighter, so must take advantage of this.

Cheers,
JT

 

[gameboy]

I am scared of the possibility of success. I truly believe that the first girl I banged from cold approach this year (who turned out to be a total psychopath) completely fucked me up.

What happened there?

 

[JT Sunshine]

Got my approach today, it went much better than the previous three this year. Ice rink approach again - blonde, probably late 30s. A bit older than my usual, but it was a total sausage fest and she had white teeth and a nice figure. I approached with "hi, how's it going?"... pretty lame, but it opened we talked skating for a bit and actually exchanged names. Nice! Eventually we went off and did our own thing, but towards the end I skated back by her and said something like "looks like you're having the most fun out here". Talked again briefly and mentioned a cool outdoor rink nearby. Said it might be fun to go there sometime. She agreed and we exchanged numbers. It felt a bit platonic, but I am used to picking up from bars at 1am, so I will call this a day game win. Also, I have been FUMBLING on making future plans/going for the contact info. PROGRESS BABY!!

For next time, I should screen for logistics and flirt more. But honestly if I can go from lame opener > chitchat/name exchange > future plans > contact info even somewhat consistently, I should be able to get at least a *few* to meet up with me. My nonverbals are rock-solid, but I need to tease/flirt more. Good stuff to work on moving forward.

Yesterday I read THIS ARTICLE by @Chase on the benefits of approaching four girls a day versus just one. Great article. Got me thinking that maybe this is why I went 2 for 120 last year - because by the time I am "warmed up", I am done for the day. I don't want to get ahead of myself, but maybe instead of setting my goal as one approach a day for the whole year, I up it to two a day in February, three a day in March and four a day from April on. That's a lofty goal for me, but I have lofty aspirations...

@gameboy she was my first bar-pull after getting back into this last year, we had one pretty amazing night, but I think she fell into obsession with me when I was thinking it was a one-time thing. She messaged me nonstop, and one night I made the mistake of meeting up again. To quote myself from months ago (I had to dig but I found it):

"She was stoned out of her mind and couldn’t pay for the $14 chicken wings she ordered. I reluctantly paid, and this was the moment I knew I would never be seeing her after tonight. I am a very kind hearted person, and I don’t think she solely wanted to use me for chicken wing money, but she knew she couldn’t pay when she ordered the wings (before I showed up) and she knows I have a good job… and I just can’t stand that shit.

Decided I would bounce her back to her place as quick as possible, do the nasty, then leave.

Went back to her place and had some absolutely dynamite sex. What they say about the crazy ones is true! However on the drive there as well as before the sex she couldn’t stop talking about how fate brought us together and that I am the most amazing guy she’s ever met in her whole life, how she’s waited years to find me, and even as we were f*cking she said “I want you to tell me your feelings about me”

She begged me to sleep over, begged to come back to my place, tried every excuse in the book to get me not to leave… but I left. Apparently didn’t make her that mad as she just texted me a novel. Be careful out here boys, the water is hot!"

That novel turned into weeks upon weeks of novels, calling me 4-5x a day, leaving me voicemails while she masturbated, leaving notes on my car, showing up at my job and ambushing me in the parking lot (I shut that down REAL quick). Thank god I have a generic name and she didn't find my home address. Made me regret some of the most solid seduction I've ever done, and I am still recovering... lol. I ended up telling her that I had absolutely no interest in having a relationship with her, and no interest in even hooking up as I didn't think it would be healthy for her, and that she would do better seeing other people who wanted more of what she wanted. She still sends me the occasional nude, and I leave it on read...

Not quite sure where I am going to get my approach in tomorrow, but I will get it. Maybe try a grocery store? Is it still considered day-game if you go to a bar at 3pm?

 

[gameboy]

Omg lol what a story! Yeah better beware of the crazies... they make for easy pulls and sometimes even great sex (sometimes not), but later one regrets it...

 

[JT Sunshine]

Omg lol what a story! Yeah better beware of the crazies... they make for easy pulls and sometimes even great sex (sometimes not), but later one regrets it...

Maybe I just need to find another one so they can duke it out in my parking lot LOL

 

[JT Sunshine]

Got two today, both at a grocery store. Spent a good 30 minutes there and didn't see much of anything. Spotted a brunette woman about my age, maybe a bit older, very cute face and a decent figure. I said hi, and teased her a bit about her messed-up sounding cart. Got a laugh. Next one was a trendy looking black girl, maybe 30. Decided to try a compliment. I opened with "your outfit is so well put together. It is truly a work of art." she smiled big and said "it must be all the Tetris I played as a kid". That was actually pretty funny!

I am going to keep pounding away at the day game approaches. If I can get good at day game in the dead of winter, summer will be cake. I can feel myself getting better - or at least more creative.

 

[JT Sunshine]

Four approaches in the last three days. Well, one was a group of two, and I kind of chatted up both… I suppose I’ll just count it as one.

First (Monday) was in line at a store. I had already been out to a different store and a bar and there was just… no women under 50 anywhere. This one was about my age, but not really the type I would go for. I tried striking a conversation but got nowhere. Some head nods and one word answers. Maybe subconsciously she could tell I wasn’t really interested.

Yesterday was at a gas station. It was busy and I was waiting for a pump. Lucked out I was behind a GORGEOUS girl. Early 20s Russian brunette. She was struggling to get her gas cap off so I opened with a little tease “that’s the hardest part about filling up gas, ya know ”. Got a big laugh. Followed up with something generic and we talked a little bit before she said “have a good day” and drove off.

Today was two girls, both SUPER cute, sitting down having lunch. This is a type of set I would typically be very nervous to approach, but I overheard one say “spicy mayo”, and without hesitation I jumped into their conversation with “that’s sounds so good right now”, very confident with a smile. They hooked! We talked a bit about how you can drown out the taste of bad food with spicyness, I told a story about a trip I took and they seemed to be hanging on every word. I went for the instagram of the girl I was talking to more, and I got it!! They seemed kind of bummed when I left (I did really have to get back to work). I’ll call this a big win! She works at a bar, maybe I can stop by and see her sometime, then suggest we go get a drink somewhere else after she gets off.

Happy I’m making day game work as I go about my life. I need to try and find a location where I can go *work* on day game, and not just do random approaches when I see a woman out and about… but that’s seeming hard to do with this weather. I’ll keep looking.

 

[JT Sunshine]

Awful week, proceeded to get some really nasty food poisoning that had me laid up for a few days. Needless to say I failed my task of an approach a day, but I also didn’t eat, or work, or do anything. Not a total loss as I got caught up on much needed sleep, and came to the realization I need to prioritize some self-care a bit. That being said it is back to approach mode!

I did get a few in before becoming bedridden, 5 I think. Two daytime, three nighttime. All the night time approaches were on the street, so not much different than day game?

All cute and reacted pretty positively, which is good reference experience. The one in the gas station was a particularly cute middle eastern girl and we had a GREAT interaction, started off talking about our favorite drinks and ended up talking about travel. I should have gone for the number when I said bye and she replied with “hope to see you around!” I was just taken a bit by surprise and my dumb ass just smiled and kept walking I do go there a lot so maybe I will see her around

Good to be feeling like myself again and will be going out/posting more

 

[JT Sunshine]

Feeling like things are finally starting to click, both with my fundamentals of opening, being more social, and self awareness of what I actually need to work on.

Went out yesterday, approached 4 women, two of which were total stunners. Also made random conversation with a few dudes just to try and stay in a social mood, which actually worked. My biggest victory was just leaving the house, as I was tired, freezing cold, and just… didn’t want to. But I pushed through and am glad I did.

One of my opens wasn’t verbal, per se, but it was calculated. I had the intrusive thought of “what if I just bump into this girl, apologize, then keep talking to her…” so I tried it, and it actually worked was mostly small talk, but she was smiling and even put her hand on my shoulder and said bye before she started walking again. Little victory, will field test this more especially once it warms up.

Two of the other four were walking opposite direction of me, got great nonverbals and smile from them but they didn’t stop for me.

The fourth was great. I opened with something stupid situational like “don’t worry, I’m not trying to steal your spot in line”. She smiled at me but said nothing. So I reopened again and we actually started talking. I teased her a bit about not dropping all the things she was trying to carry, and she started qualifying herself a bit. We were definitely in each other’s bubbles, I gave her a couple of light touches that were met with no resistance. I held the best eye contact I have in weeks and she held it right back. It was like we were staring into each other’s souls. She was definitely attracted.

This is kind of where it all clicked for me. I’m going to rant a bit…

Everyone talks about “approach anxiety”, and for over a year I’ve made approaching a large focus of mine as I’ve realized that the early stages of game are my weak point. And you can’t pick up if you don’t approach. But I don’t think that it’s really approach anxiety at all. At least not for me. Tell me, how scary would it be to just go tap some girl on the arm and say “Lexi? Ope, thought you were someone else” and leave. No risk, no reward, and really no fear in that. So did I ever really have anxiety about approaching? Or was it that maybe if I did the approach, I would get met with attention but a blank stare, and I would have to think of something else to say… aha! That’s it. There’s the sticking point.

So what if I reframe the approach as simply doing or saying something to get a girl’s attention, then focus on the follow up, whatever it may be. An observation, a question, maybe even a compliment. I think I can handle that. But what next? Well, maybe I can introduce a frame and see if she accepts it or not. If she accepts it, then I can challenge her a bit, and try to get her to qualify herself. “You have the most vibrant eyes I’ve seen today” if I get a dismissive “thanks” then I move on… but if she smiles and seems genuinely happy I said it, perfect, she accepted my frame. Then I can tease her “what’s with those earrings tho?” or challenge her “is there more to you then meets the eye?”

So if I catch myself blanking out, I just need to say/do something to fill in whatever step I am at.

1. get attention
2. Observation/question
3. Set frame, hopefully she accepts frame
4. Tease/qualify

If all that works, then I can go back to being less of a seduction robot and reward her with a name exchange, try and move her somewhere to deep dive, and I am off to the races. If time is short, get contact info, and try to set up a date.

Anything beyond getting her to move somewhere with me or getting her on a date is what I’m actually good at. I need to improve at seeing the windows open to escalate and escalating- always been a sticking point of mine as well. But that will come with practice. But can’t practice if I can’t get past the initial interaction…

I’ve been trying out a more natural style over the last year, with a bit of success and a lot of failure, but I think internalizing a simple structure and following it is going to work wonders for me. I can FEEL myself on the brink of a breakthrough here. Just in time for spring too

Have also been dealing with some inner game issues and feeling weird/insecure about going out by myself, whether it be during the day or bars at night with the intention of practicing my skills with women. And I think that’s subconsciously being reflected outwardly. But I really got to thinking, what is wrong with wanting to practice your social skills and become the best version of you? To get good at something that will positively affect every aspect of your life? That’s actually pretty fucking cool, and everyone should do it. Truly believing that has given me this weird confidence and I just KNOW that I am going to see massive improvement soon